Assertiveness
Presented by
Maj Mercy Jacob
1st year M Sc
Trainee officer
WHAT IS
ASSERTIVENESS?
Assertiveness is about self confidence which
means having a positive attitude towards
yourself and others.
“it is not about dominating others”
Assertive
communication
It is the ability to express positive and negative ideas
and feelings in an open, honest and direct way.
It recognises our rights whilst still respecting the
rights of others.
It allows us to take responsibility for ourselves and
our actions without judging or blaming other people.
confidence
clear
control
Ten Points about Assertive
Behaviours
Or
Basic human rights
1 The right to be treated with respect.
2. The right to express feelings, opinions, and beliefs.
3. The right to say “no” without feeling guilty.
4. The right to make mistakes and accept the
responsibility for them.
5. The right to be listened to and taken seriously.
6. The right to change your mind.
7. The right to ask for what you want.
8. The right to put yourself first, sometimes.
9. The right to set your own priorities.
10. The right to refuse justification for your feelings
or behavior.
Response pattern
Based on response pattern 4 types
of behaviour are:
Non-assertive behaviour
I am not ok,you are ok
Assertive behaviour
I am ok,you are ok
Aggresive behaviour
I am ok,you are not ok
Passive aggressive behaviour
I am not ok,you are not ok
Manipulative or passive
Lack of self confidence and low self esteem
Lack of self respect and lack of respect for others
Mistrustful and suspicious of others’ motives
Negative feelings and thoughts about self and others
Feel very wary towards others
Dishonest and indirect
Twist what others have said
Undermine others’ self esteem
Depressed and demotivated
Why is it difficult to say NO
If I say no,they may feel hurt or injected
If I say no this time, they may not like me anymore
If I say no this time,they may never ask again
They won’t take any notice if I say no
They would say ‘yes’ to me (and so I will feel guilty if I
refuse them)
I can’t say no, because I feel sorry for them
Behavioural concept of
assertiveness
Skılls/techniques of assertıveness
Standing up for ones right
Assuming responsibility
Broken record
Agreeing assertively
Inquiring assertively
Shifting from content to process
Skılls/techniques of assertıveness(cont)
Fogging/clouding
Defusing
Delaying assertively
Responding assertively
Using I statements
To decide when to be assertive
Do you know really what is the situation?
How much importance it has for you?
Will you get what you want?
Do you want to just express yourself?
What is your options?
Do you want an optimistic result?
Are you ready to be assertive?
Did you count to the 10?
Is it beter to wait?
Will you get anger to yourself, ,f you don’t
do anything?
Have you done your best?
What are the possible results and risks?
Will assertiveness cause a change?
Role of nurse in assertiveness training