INTRODUCTION TO

PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

The concept of personality - Dimensions of personality – Theories of Freud & Erickson-

Significance of personality development. The concept of success and failure: What is
success? - Hurdles in achieving success - Overcoming hurdles - Factors responsible for
success – What is failure - Causes of failure - SWOT analysis.

THE CONCEPT OF PERSONALITY- DEFINITION:

“Personality is that pattern of characteristic thoughts, feelings, and behaviours that distinguishes one
person from another and that persists over time”
“It is the sum of biologically based and learnt behaviour which forms the person's unique responses to
environmental stimuli”

DIMENSIONS OF PERSONALITY:
The Big Five personality traits, also known as the five factor model (FFM), is a model based on common
language descriptors of personality (lexical hypothesis). These descriptors are grouped together using a
statistical technique called factor analysis (i.e. this model is not based on scientific experiments).
This widely examined theory suggests five broad dimensions used by some psychologists to describe the
human personality and psyche. The five factors have been defined as openness to experience,
conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism, often listed under the acronyms
“OCEAN”.

Dimension of Personality High Level Low level

Openness to experience Inventive, Curious Cautious, Conservative
Conscientiousness Efficient, Organised Easy going, Careless
Extraversion Outgoing, Energetic Solitary, Reserved
Agreeableness Friendly, Compassionate Competitive, Outspoken
Neuroticism Sensitive, Nervous Secure, Confident
These five factors are assumed to represent the basic structure behind all personality traits. They were
defined and described by several different researchers during multiple periods of research.
Employees are sometimes tested on the Big Five personality traits in collaborative situations to determine
what strong personality traits they can add to a group dynamic. Businesses need to understand their people
as well as their operations and processes. Understanding the personality components that drive the
employee behavior is a very useful informational data point for management.

THE FIVE DIMENSIONS OF PERSONALITY: (THE FIVE FACTOR MODEL)

a. Openness to experience: (inventive/curious vs. consistent/cautious):
Openness to experience describes a person's degree of intellectual curiosity, creativity, appreciation for art,
emotion, adventure, unusual ideas, curiosity, and variety of experience. It is also described as the extent to
which a person is imaginative or independent, and depicts a personal preference for a variety of activities
over a strict routine. High openness can be perceived as unpredictability or lack of focus. Moreover,
individuals with high openness are said to pursue self-actualization specifically by seeking out intense,
euphoric experiences, such as skydiving, living abroad, gambling, etc. Conversely, those with low
openness seek to gain fulfilment through perseverance, and are characterized as pragmatic and data-
driven—sometimes even perceived to be dogmatic and closed-minded. Some disagreement remains about
how to interpret and contextualize the openness factor.

b. Conscientiousness (efficient/organized vs. easy-going/careless):

Conscientiousness is a tendency to show self-discipline, act dutifully, and aim for achievement.
Conscientiousness also refers to planning, organization, and dependability. High conscientiousness is
often perceived as stubbornness and obsession. Low conscientiousness is associated with flexibility and
spontaneity, but can also appear as sloppiness and lack of reliability.

c. Extraversion: (outgoing/energetic vs. solitary/reserved):

Extraversion describes energy, positive emotions, assertiveness, sociability, talkativeness, and the
tendency to seek stimulation in the company of others. High extraversion is often perceived as attention-
seeking, and domineering. Low extraversion causes a reserved, reflective personality, which can be
perceived as aloof or self-absorbed.

d. Agreeableness: (friendly/compassionate vs. analytical/detached):

Agreeableness is a tendency to be compassionate and cooperative rather than suspicious and antagonistic
towards others. It is also a measure of one's trusting and helpful nature, and whether a person is generally
well-tempered or not. High agreeableness is often seen as naive or submissive. Low agreeableness
personalities are often competitive or challenging people, which can be seen as argumentative or
untrustworthy.
e. Neuroticism: (sensitive/nervous vs. Secure/confident).
Neuroticism is a tendency to experience unpleasant emotions easily, such as anger, anxiety, depression,
and vulnerability. Neuroticism also refers to the degree of emotional stability and impulse control and is
sometimes referred to by its low pole, "emotional stability". A high need for stability manifests as a stable
and calm personality, but can be seen as uninspiring and unconcerned. A low need for stability causes a
reactive and excitable personality, often very dynamic individuals, but they can be perceived as unstable
or insecure.

PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT:
 Personality development includes activities that improve awareness and identity, develop talents
and potential, build human capital and facilitate employability, enhance quality of life and
contribute to the realization of dreams and aspirations.
 When personal development takes place in the context of institutions, it refers to the methods,
programs, tools, techniques, and assessment systems that support human development at the
individual level in organizations.
 Personality development includes activities that develop talents, improve awareness, enhances
potential and looks to improve the quality of life. It involves formal and informal activities that
put people in the role of leaders, guides, teachers, and managers for helping them realize their full
potential.
 Hence, it can be concluded that the process of improving or transforming the personality is called
personality development.

SIGNIFICANCE OR IMPORTANCE OF PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT:

Most people underestimate the importance of having a pleasing personality. Majority think it just
means being born good-looking, that there isn’t anything much to do about it. But this is not true. The
scope of personality development is quite broad. It includes knowing how to dress well, social graces,
grooming, speech and interpersonal skills. Whatever your career, these are very important skills that will
promote your objectives.

To better appreciate its importance, some of the key benefits of developing your personality include the
following:

a. Confidence:
Personality development gives more confidence to people. When you know you are appropriately attired
and groomed, this makes you less anxious when meeting a person. Knowing the right things to say and
how to conduct yourself will increase your confidence.
b. Credibility:
Personality development makes people more credible. Despite the saying that you don’t judge a book by
its cover, people do tend to judge people by their clothing and how it is worn. This does not mean buying
expensive clothes. We all know people who look shabby in expensive clothes. There are also people who
look great even if their attire is inexpensive. Because of this, you must know what to wear and you must
be aware of other aspects of enhancing your physical features.

c. Interaction:
Personality development encourages people to interact with others. Studies have consistently shown that
people communicate more openly with people they are comfortable with. If your hygiene and social
graces are unrefined, then expect to have a much harder time connecting with people.

d. Leading and Motivating:

Personality development enhances the capacity to lead and motivate. A person with a winning personality
will be able to motivate better. People are less likely to get bored, and our ideas will have more credibility.
We can lead better if we project an aura of confidence and credibility.

e. Curiosity:
A single wrong word can destroy a business relationship. Knowing the right things to say shows both
respect and intellectual sophistication. This is especially the case if you are dealing with foreigners or if
you conduct business outside the country. The right thing to do in our country could be horrible blunders
in a different culture. These are the soft skills that may break or make a deal.

f. Communication skills:
It improves your communication skills. People are more receptive to what you say if they are impressed
with your personality. Verbal communication skills are also part of personality development; improving
your speech will strengthen the impact of your message.

You cannot win by talent and hard work alone. Personality development is a crucial ingredient that you
must obtain. Most of the people you see as models of great personality have taken a lot of effort in
developing their natural features.
ATTITUDE & MOTIVATION
Attitude - Concept - Significance - Factors affecting attitudes - Positive attitude –
Advantages –Negative attitude- Disadvantages - Ways to develop positive attitude -
Differences between personalities having positive and negative attitude. Concept of
motivation - Significance – Internal and external motives - Importance of self- motivation-
Factors leading to de-motivation

DEFINITION:
An attitude is a positive, negative, or mixed evaluation of an object that is expressed at some level
of intensity. It usually implies feelings that are either positive or negative.
Attitudes are our established ways of responding to people and situations that we have learned
based on the beliefs, values and assumptions we hold and our life experiences.
Our attitude towards a person or event is displaced through our behaviour as a result of interaction
with that person. A person’s attitude represents how he or she feels about something or their state of mind.

Example:
If one can have a good (or positive) attitude toward their work, it means they feel good about their
work, their job, their organisation, etc.
If one can have a bad (or negative) attitude, it means they dislike their environment no matter
what is going around them.

CONCEPT OF ATTITUDE:
The concept of attitude occupies a very favoured position in social psychology and is considered
very important for every individual who wants success in their life.
Attitudes are evaluative statements, either favourable or unfavourable, concerning objects, people
or events. They reflect how one feels about something.
Example:

When you say “I like Mathematics”, you are expressing your attitude towards the subject of mathematics.

THREE CONCEPTS OF ATTITUDE:

1. Cognitive Attitude:
Our belief in something is the cognitive attitude.
Example: “Gender discrimination is widespread” - This is an opinion which evaluates the topic of discrimation
based on gender.
 Affective Attitude:
It is the emotional or feeling segment of attitude.
Example: “I don’t like Jon because he discriminates against minorities.”

1. Behavioural attitude:
It refers to an intention to behave in a certain way toward someone or something.
Example: Employees working in an organisation commonly can follow certain behaviour for the purpose of
betterment of the organisation

SIGNIFICANCE OR IMPORTANCE OF ATTITUDE:

Attitude plays a very important role for achieving the success. It is more important than
education, money, knowledge, intelligence, talents or skills.
It applies to every sphere of life, including one's personal and professional life. Can an executive
be a good executive without a good attitude? Can a student be a good student without a good attitude? Can
a parent, teacher, salesman, employer, employee be good in their roles without a good attitude?
The foundation of success regardless of your chosen field is attitude. If attitude is such a critical
factor in success, shouldn't you examine your attitude toward life and ask how your attitude will affect
your goals?
Example:

Journalists, friends, armed forces, Specialists and event their father laughed at an idea of an aeroplane proposed
by Orville Wright and Wilbur Wright (Wright brothers). Many people told “What a silly and insane way to
spend money?” “Only birds can fly. Machines cannot fly!”

The Wright brothers responded we have a dream and we can make it happen”. As a result, the aeroplanes were
invented.

This shows the importance of attitude towards the success.

FACTORS AFFECTING ATTITUDE:

There are primarily three factors that determine our attitude. They are:
1. Environment
2. Experience
3. Education
These are called the triple Es of attitude. Let's evaluate each of the factors individually.

1. Environment
Environment consists of the following:
 Home: Parents, Siblings, relatives, Neighbours and friends.
 School: Teachers, school staff, seniors, juniors.
 Work place: Colleagues, superiors and subordinates.
  Media: Television, newspapers, magazines, radio, movies
 Cultural background
 Religious background
 Traditions and beliefs
 Social environment
 Political environment
All of these environments create a culture. Every place, a home, organization or a country has a culture.
In countries where the government and political environment is honest, generally you will find that the
people are honest, law abiding and helpful. And the reverse is true too. In a corrupt environment, an
honest person has a tough time whereas in an honest environment, the corrupt one has a tough time. In a
positive environment, a marginal performer's output goes up. In a negative environment, a good
performer's output goes down.

2. Experiences:
Our behaviour changes according to our experiences with people and events in our life. If we have a
positive experience with a person, our attitude toward him becomes positive and vice versa.

3. Education:
It refers to both formal and informal education, not just academic qualifications. Knowledge strategically
applied translates into wisdom, ensuring success. Education makes the role of the educator vital. A teacher
affects eternity. The ripple effect is immeasurable.
We are drowning in information but starving for knowledge and wisdom. Education ought to teach us not
only how to make a living but also how to live.

POSITIVE ATTITUDE:
A positive attitude helps you to cope more easily with the daily affairs of life. It brings optimism
into your life and makes it easier to avoid worry and negative thinking. It will bring constructive changes
into your life and make you happier, brighter and more successful.
People with positive attitudes have certain personality traits that are easy to recognize. They are
caring, confident, patient, and humble. They have high expectations of themselves and others. They
anticipate positive outcomes. A person with a positive attitude is like a fruit of all seasons. He is always
welcome.

The Benefits of a Positive Attitude:

These are many and easy to see. But what is easy to see is also easy to miss. To mention a few, a positive
attitude
 increases productivity
 fosters teamwork
  solves problems
 improves quality
 makes for congenial atmosphere
 breeds loyalty
 increases profits
 fosters better relationships with employers, employees, and customers
 reduces stress
 helps a person become a contributing member of society and an asset to their country
 makes for a pleasing personality

Steps to build a Positive Attitude:

Step 1: Changing the Focus and Looking for the Positive:

We need to become good finders. We need to focus on the positive in life. Let's start looking for
what is right in a person or situation instead of looking for what is wrong. Even in paradise, fault finders
will find faults. Most people find what they are looking for. If they are looking for friendship, happiness
and the positive, that is what they get. If they are looking for fights or indifference, then that is what they
get. Looking for the positive does not mean overlooking faults.

Step 2: Making a Habit of Doing It Now:

We have all procrastinated at some time in our lives. Procrastination leads to a negative attitude.
The habit of procrastination fatigues you more than the effort it takes to do it. A completed task is
fulfilling and energizing; an incomplete task drains energy like a leak from a tank. If you want to build
and maintain a positive attitude, get into the habit of living in the present and doing it now.

Step 3: Developing an Attitude of Gratitude:

Count your blessings, not your troubles. Take time to smell the roses. It is not uncommon to hear
that someone, because of an accident or illness, became blind or paralyzed but won a million dollars in
settlement. How many of us would like to trade places with that person? Not many. We are so focused on
complaining about things we don't have that we lose sight of the things we have. There is a lot to be
thankful for.

Step 4: Getting into a Continuous Education Program:

Let's get some myths out of the way. It is a general belief that we get educated in schools and
colleges. "Do we really get educated in schools and colleges?" Generally, there is a consensus that some
do but most don't. We receive a lot of information in schools and colleges and that alone is not needed in
achieving our goals. We do need information to be educated. But we need to know the true meaning of
education.
Step 5: Building a Positive Self-Esteem:
Self-esteem is the way we feel about ourselves. When we feel good within, our performance goes
up, our relationships improve both at home and at work. The world looks nicer. What is the reason? There
is a direct correlation between feeling and behaviour.

Step 6: Staying away from Negative Influences:

Today's teenagers learn from adult behaviour and the media. They face peer pressure. Peer
pressure is not just limited to teenagers; it is also prevalent in adults. It shows a lack of self-esteem when
people do not have the courage to say "No, thank you," and stay away from negative influences: What are
the negative influences?

NEGATIVE ATTITUDE:
People with negative attitudes will blame the whole world, their parents, teachers, spouse, the
economy and the government for their failures.
Some people criticize no matter what. It does not matter which side you are on, they are always on
the other side. They have made a career out of criticizing. They are "career critics." They criticize as if
they will win a prize at a contest. They will find fault with every person and every situation. You will find
people like this in every home, family, office. They go around finding fault and telling everybody how bad
things are and blaming the whole world for their problems.
All that they are doing is causing more tension for themselves and for others around them. They spread
negative messages like a plague and create an environment conducive to negative results. Some people
always look at the negative side.

Who are pessimists? Pessimists

 are unhappy when they have no troubles to speak
 feel bad when they feel good, for fear they will feel worse when they feel better
 spend most of their life at complaint counters
 always turn out the lights to see how dark it is
 are always looking for cracks in the mirror of life
 stop sleeping in bed when they hear that more people die in bed than anywhere else
 cannot enjoy their health because they think they may be sick tomorrow
 not only expect the worst but make the worst of whatever happens
 don't see the doughnut, only the hole
 believe that the sun shines only to cast shadows
 forget their blessings and count their troubles
 know that hard work never hurts anyone but believe "why take a chance?"
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN NEGATIVE AND POSITIVE ATTITUDES.
[Link] Negative attitude personality Positive attitude personality

1 They are always part of the problem They are always part of the answer

2 They always has an excuse They always has a program

3 Sees a problem for every answers Sees an answer for every problem

4 Says “It may be possible but it is too difficult” Says “It may be difficult but it is possible”

5 Says “It was not my fault Says “I was wrong”

6 Always apart from the team Always a part of the team.

7 Sees only problems Sees all possibilities

8 Says “Life is hard” Says “Life is filled with experiences”

9 Thinks “People are worst” Thinks “Good people are there”

10 Always hates the work place Always work with lovely people

11 They are mostly losers They are mostly winners

12 Always looks on the negative side Always looks on the positive side

13 They are always angry, frustrated and stressed. They are always happier, polite and lovable

14. Always says “Impossible” Always says “Possible”

15. Says “I can’t do” Says “I can do”

MOTIVATION
Concept of Motivation:
 Motivation is something that encourages action or feeling. To motivate means to encourage and
inspire. Motivation can also mean to turn on or ignite the feeling or action.
 Motivation is powerful. It can persuade, convince and propel you into action. In other words,
motivation can be defined as motive for action. It is a force that can literally change your life.
 Motivation is the driving force in our lives. It comes from a desire to succeed. Without success
there is little pride in life; no enjoyment or excitement at work and at home. Often life becomes
like a lopsided wheel giving a bumpy ride.
The greatest enemy of motivation is complacence. Complacence leads to frustration, and when people are
frustrated they give up because they cannot identify what is important.
Significance and types:
Once you understand the principle that motivates the motivator, you can proceed to achieve your
goal and can motivate others too.
Your internal motivation is your drive and attitude. It is contagious. Attitude is the key to getting
the response you want from others. How does a person stay motivated and focused? One important tool
that has been used by athletes for a long time is called auto-suggestion. Auto suggestions are positive
statements made in the present tense and repeated regularly. In other words it is positive self-talk.
Motivation is classified into two types:
1. External motivation and
2. Internal motivation.

EXTERNAL MOTIVATION
External motivation comes from outside, such as money, societal approval, fame or fear.
Examples of external motivation are fear of getting spanked by parents and fear of getting fired at work.
A company wanted to set up a pension plan. In order for the plan to be installed, it needed 100%
participation. Everyone signed up except John. The plan made sense and was in the best interest of
everyone. John not signing was the only obstacle. John's supervisor and other co-workers had tried to
persuade him without success.
The owner of the company called John into his office and said, "John, here is a pen and these are
the papers for you to sign to enrol into the pension plan. If you don't enrol, you are fired this minute."
John signed right away. The owner asked John why he hadn't signed earlier. John replied, "No one
explained the plan quite as clearly as you did."

Fear Motivation
The advantages of fear motivation are:
 It gets the job done quickly.
 It is instantaneous.
 It prevents loss, by meeting deadlines.
 In the short run the person's performance may
improve. The disadvantages of fear motivation are:
 It is external, which means the motivation is there while the motivator is there. When the
motivator goes, the motivation also goes.
 It causes stress. Performance is limited to compliance.
 In the long run, performance goes down. It destroys creativity.
 They get used to the stick and then need a bigger stick.

Example: A customer asked an employee, "When did you start working here?" He replied, "Ever since
they threatened to fire me."
Incentive Motivation
External motivation can also take the form of incentives, bonuses, commission, recognition, etc.
What are the advantages of incentive motivation? The major advantage is that it can work very well as
long as the incentive is strong enough. Think of a donkey with a carrot dangling in front and with a cart
behind. Incentive motivation will only work if the donkey is hungry enough, the carrot is sweet enough
and the load is light enough. From time to time, you have to let the donkey take a bite of the carrot;
otherwise it is going to get discouraged. After the donkey takes a bite, its stomach is full, and you need to
wait for the donkey to get hungry again before it will pull the cart. This is typically seen in our business
environment. The moment sales people meet their quota, they stop working. This is because their
motivation is limited to meeting their quota. That is external, not internal.

INTERNAL MOTIVATION
Internal motivation is the inner gratification, not for success or winning, but for the fulfilment that comes
from having done it. It is a feeling of accomplishment, rather than just achieving a goal. Reaching an
unworthy goal does not give the gratifying feeling. Internal motivation is lasting, because it comes from
within and translates into self-motivation.
Motivation needs to be identified and constantly strengthened to succeed. Keep your goals in front of you
and read them morning and evening.
The two most important motivating factors are recognition and responsibility.
 Recognition means being appreciated; being treated with respect and dignity; and feeling a sense
of belonging.
 Responsibility gives a person a feeling of belonging and ownership. He then becomes part of the
bigger picture. Lack of responsibility can become demotivating.
Monetary rewards are temporary and short-lived; they are not gratifying in the long run. In contrast, seeing
an idea being implemented can be emotionally gratifying by itself. People feel that they are not being
treated like objects. They feel part of a worthwhile team. The reward of doing the right thing by itself is
motivating.

THE FOUR STAGES FROM MOTIVATION TO DEMOTIVATION

1. Motivated Ineffective
This is the stage when the employee is most open minded, receptive and easy to mold to the culture of the
organization. Training and orientation become imperative.
Professional organizations, on the other hand, take special care to induct people into their organizations.
They explain to them, among other things, the following:
 the hierarchy
 expectations of each other
 do's and don’ts
 parameters and guidelines
  what is acceptable and what is not
 what are the resources

2. Motivated Effective:
This is the stage when the employee has learned what to do and does it with drive and energy. He has
learned the trade and it reflects in his performance. Then he moves on to the next stage.

3. Demotivated Effective:
After some time the motivation level goes down and the employee starts learning the tricks of the trade.
This is the stage when the employee is not motivated. He continues doing just enough so that the employer
has no reason to fire him but he is really not motivated.
This stage is detrimental to growth--most people in organizations fall into this third stage. A motivated
professional learns the trade and leaves the tricks to cheats and crooks, but a demotivated employee start
sabotaging the company. His performance is marginal. He makes fun of the good performers. He rejects
new ideas and spreads the negativity all around.
Our objective is to bring them back to the second stage of motivated effective through training. An
employee ought not to stay in the third stage too long; because from here either they move back to the
second stage, which is being motivated and effective, or they move into the fourth stage.

4. Demotivated Ineffective:
At this stage, the employer does not have much choice but to fire the employee, which may be the most
appropriate thing to do anyway at this point.
Remember, employers want the same thing as employees do. They want to succeed and improve business
and if employees help in this objective, then they make themselves valuable and achieve their own
success.

DEMOTIVATING FACTORS:
Some of the demotivating factors are:
 Unfair criticism
 Negative criticism
 Public humiliation
 Rewarding the non performer which can be demotivating for the performer
 Failure or fear of failure
 Success which leads to complacence
 Lack of direction
 Lack of measurable objectives
 Low self-esteem
 Lack of priorities
  Negative self-talk
 Office politics
 Unfair treatment
 Hypocrisy
 Poor standards
 Frequent change
 Responsibility without authority

MOTIVATING FACTORS:
What we really want to accomplish is self-motivation, when people do things for their own reasons and
not yours. That is lasting motivation.
Remember, the greatest motivator is belief. We have to inculcate in ourselves the belief that we are
responsible for our actions and behaviour. When people accept responsibility, everything improves:
quality, productivity, relationships and teamwork.
A few steps to motivate others:
 Give recognition
 Give respect
 Make work interesting
 Be a good listener
 Throw a challenge
 Help but don't do for others what they should do for themselves
 SELF-ESTEEM
Term self-esteem - Symptoms - Advantages - Do's and Don’ts to develop positive self-esteem
– Low self- esteem - Symptoms - Personality having low self esteem - Positive and negative
self esteem. Interpersonal Relationships – Defining the difference between aggressive,
submissive and assertive behaviours - Lateral thinking.

DEFINITION:
Self-esteem is how we value ourselves; it is how we perceive our value to the world and how valuable we
think we are to others. Self-esteem affects our trust in others, our relationships, and our work – nearly
every part of our lives.

HIGH or POSTIVE SELF ESTEEM:

Positive self-esteem gives us the strength and flexibility to take charge of our lives and grow from our
mistakes without the fear of rejection.

Symptoms and Signs of High Self-Esteem:

Some of the outward signs of high self-esteem:
 Confidence
 Self-direction
 Non-blaming behaviour
 An awareness of personal strengths
 An ability to make mistakes and learn from them
 An ability to accept mistakes from others
 Optimism
 An ability to solve problems
 An independent and cooperative attitude
 Feeling comfortable with a wide range of emotions
 An ability to trust others
 A good sense of personal limitations
 Good self-care
 The ability to say no
Advantages of High Self-Esteem
There is a direct relationship between people's feelings and their productivity. High self-esteem is evident
in respect for one's self, others, property, law, parents and one's country. The reverse is also true.
Self-esteem:
 Builds strong conviction.
 Creates willingness to accept responsibility.
 Builds optimistic attitudes.
 Leads to better relationships and fulfilling lives.
 Makes a person more sensitive to others' needs and develop a caring attitude.
 Makes a person self-motivated and ambitious.
 Makes a person open to new opportunities and challenges.
 Improves performance and increases risk-taking ability.
 Helps a person give and receive both criticism and compliments tactfully and easily.

LOW SELF ESTEEM:

Low self-esteem is a worst condition that keeps individuals from realizing their full potential. A person
with low self-esteem feels unworthy, incapable and incompetent. In fact, because the person with low self-
esteem feels so poorly about him or herself, these feelings may actually cause the person’s continued low
self-esteem.

Symptoms and Signs of Low Self-Esteem:

 Negative view of life
 Perfectionist attitude
 Mistrusting others – even those who show signs of affection
 Blaming behaviour
 Fear of taking risks
 Feelings of being unloved and unlovable
 Dependence – letting others make decisions
 Fear of being ridiculed

INCREASING OUR SELF ESTEEM:

Feelings of low self-esteem often build up over a lifetime, and letting go of ingrained feelings and
behaviours is not an easy task. It may take time, hard work, and it may require professional counselling.
But there are some simple, positive thinking techniques that can be used to help improve self-esteem.
These are called affirmations.
Using affirmations to stop negative self-talk is a simple, positive way to help increase self-esteem.
Affirmations are encouraging messages we can give ourselves every day until they become part of our
feelings and beliefs. Affirmations work best when a person is relaxed. But since people are often upset
when they are giving themselves negative self-messages, they may need to counter negative messages
with positive ones.

For example, replace the message “I made a stupid mistake, and I am no good at this job,” with “Yes, I
made a mistake but I have learned from it, and now I can a better job.”

Begin each day by looking in the mirror and giving us a positive message. The following
affirmations can help you to work toward a positive self-image:
 I respect myself and others
 I am lovable and likable
 I am confident, and it shows
 I am creating loving, healthy relationships
 I am a good friend to myself and others
 I accept myself just as I am
 I look great
 Life is good, and I like being a part of it

PERSONALITY HAVING LOW SELF ESTEEM

 They are generally gossip mongers.
 They have a critical nature. They criticize as if there is a contest going on and they have to win a
prize.
 They have high egos they are arrogant and believe they know it all. People with low self-esteem
are generally difficult to work with and for. They tear down others to get a feeling of superiority.
 They are closed minded and self-centred.
 They constantly make excuses--always justifying failures.
 They never accept responsibility--always blaming others.
 They have a fatalistic attitude no initiative and always waiting for things to happen.
 They are jealous by nature.
 They are unwilling to accept positive criticism. They become defensive.
 They are bored and uncomfortable when alone.
DIFFERENCES BETWEEN HIGH SELF ESTEEM AND LOW SELF ESTEEM:

[Link] High Self-Esteem Personality Low Self-Esteem Personality

1 Talk about ideas Talk about people
2 Caring attitude Critical attitude
3 Humility Arrogance
4 Respects authority Rebels against authority
5 Courage of conviction Goes along to get along
6 Confidence Confusion
7 Concerned about character Concerned about reputation
8 Assertive Aggressive
9 Accepts responsibility Blames the whole world
10 Self-interest Selfish
11 Optimistic Fatalistic
12 Understanding Greedy
13 Willing to learn Know it all
14 Sensitive Touchy
15 Solitude Lonely
16 Discuss Argue
17 Believes in self-worth Believes in net worth only
18 Guided Misguided
19 Discipline Distorted sense of freedom
20 Internally driven Externally driven
21 Respects others Looks down on others
22 Enjoys decency Enjoys vulgarity
23 Knows limit Everything goes
24 Giver Taker
 OTHER ASPECTS OF
PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT

Body language – Problem solving - Conflict and Stress Management - Decision-making

skills - Leadership and qualities of a successful leader – Character building -Team-work –
Time management -Work ethics –Good manners and etiquette.

BODY LANGUAGE:
Definition:
"Body language is the unconscious and conscious transmission and interpretation of feelings,
attitudes, and moods, through: body posture, movement, physical state, position and relationship to other
bodies, objects and surroundings, facial expression and eye movement, the process of communicating
what you are feeling or thinking by the way you place and move your body rather than by words”
The study of body language is known as kinesics, which is derived from the Greek word kinesis,
meaning motion.

Importance of Body Language:

When one expresses his/her feelings, it has been said that.
 55% of the communication consists of body language.
 38% is expressed via the tone of voice or intonation and amazingly only
 7% is communicated via words.
This means that we express most of our feeling (93%) in a non-verbal way and our words only convey 7%
of what we are saying or expressing.
Body Language is a significant aspect of modern communications and relationships. Body
Language is therefore very relevant to management and leadership, and to all aspects of work and business
where communications can be seen and physically observed among people.
Body language is also very relevant to relationships outside of work, for example, in families and
parenting, behaving with friends, etc
Communication includes listening. In terms of observable body language, non-verbal (non-
spoken) signals are being exchanged whether these signals are accompanied by spoken words or not.
Factors of Body Language:
Body language is not just about how we hold and move our bodies.
Body language potentially (although not always, depending on the definition you choose to apply)
encompasses:
 how we position our bodies
 our closeness to and the space between us and other people and how this changes
 our facial expressions
 our eyes especially and how our eyes move and focus, etc
 how we touch ourselves and others
 how our bodies connect with other non-bodily things, for instance, pens, cigarettes, spectacles and
clothing
 our breathing, and other less noticeable physical effects, for example our heartbeat and
perspiration

Body language tends not to include the pace, pitch, and intonation, volume, variation, pauses, etc., of our
voice.

Voice type and other audible signals are typically not included in body language because they are audible
'verbal' signals rather than physical visual ones, nevertheless the way the voice is used is a very significant
(usually unconscious) aspect of communication, aside from the bare words themselves. Similarly
breathing and heartbeat, etc., are typically excluded from many general descriptions of body language, but
are certainly part of the range of non-verbal bodily actions and signals which contribute to body language
in its fullest sense.

More obviously, our eyes are a vital aspect of our body language.
Our reactions to other people's eyes - movement, focus, expression, etc - and their reactions to our eyes -
contribute greatly to mutual assessment and understanding, consciously and unconsciously.

Our interpretation of body language, notably eyes and facial expressions, is instinctive, and with a little
thought and knowledge we can significantly increase our conscious awareness of these signals: both the
signals we transmit, and the signals in others that we observe.

Doing so gives us a significant advantage in life - professionally and personally - in our dealings with
others. Body language is not just reading the signals in other people.
PROBLEM SOLVING:
Problem Solving is a mental process wherein an individual analyzes interprets a task or a problem
at hand and chooses from a pool of possibilities to reach the simplest solution. It involves an
individual’s creativity and decision making abilities.
Following steps should be followed while solving a problem:

1. Identifying the problem: It is important to have clarity about what the problem at hand is and what it
demands. The resources required to solve the task and the kind of solutions that have been used before and
have been successes and failures.

2. Forming a strategy: The approach to solving the problem will depend upon the environment and the
available resources. It will differ from individual to individual since they will have their own preferences
and set schemas.

3. Organizing Information: As stated before, it is important to gather as much information as possible

and organizing it, segregating it to identify the gaps. Whether it’s a top down approach or a bottom up
approach, one should be able to identify the source of the problem.

4. Allocating resources and monitoring the process: Once you know the problem, its source and have
organized the information, allocate the resources such as time, money etc, including past experiences and
future impacts. For effective solutions, one also needs to monitor the progress of the approach to avoid
being caught in the vicious circle of escalation of commitment.

5. Evaluating the Solution: Once the task at hand has been solved, what is its present and future impact?
It can be immediate such as solving a math problem or a long term process such as a learning curve.

CONFLICT AND STRESS MANAGEMENT:

a) Conflict Management:
 Conflict is a condition where there is opposition, disagreement between two or more people. This may
be due to lack of communication, differences over certain issues and/or contradiction in ideas, beliefs and
thoughts.
 Conflicts at workplace can hamper the progress of your work and in turn stunts the growth of the
organization.
 Conflicts act as barriers to healthy organizational development. Sometimes, however, how hard we try;
we end up with conflicting thoughts with team members. Therefore it is necessary to manage conflicts in a
way such that it has minimum impact on our lives.
 Unresolved conflicts can be hazardous especially at work places. They can lead to inappropriate
behavior such as avoidance, inability to work in teams, verbal assaults, and overall resentment. In worst
 cases, some of the employees in the organization become so hostile that they eventually have to quit their
work and separate from the organization.

b) Stress Management:
 All of us are living a fast paced demanding life, dealing with work pressure, home responsibilities, and
other commitments all the time that leads to the stress.
This stress becomes a part and parcel of our life. However, managing stress is extremely important.
Stress has a lot of harmful effects on our body and mind.
People under stress often experience headaches, anxiety, depression, negative thoughts, nausea, anger,
frustration etc.
Hence to avoid these problems, maintaining stress is extremely important.. Regular Exercising, change
the routine work, yoga, meditation and breathing exercises are great ways to combat stress. The ultimate
goal to manage stress is to lead a balanced life.
 Some people with stress is to smoke and consume large amounts of alcohol. Also, avoid eating or
sleeping too much when you are stressed because this will make you lethargic.
Relax, rejuvenate and recharge yourself so that you can function more efficiently.

DECISION MAKING SKILLS

A Systematic Approach for Making Decisions

In real-life business situations, decisions can often fail because the best alternatives are not clear at the outset,
or key factors are not considered as part of the process. To stop this happening, you need to bring problem-
solving and decision-making strategies together to clarify your understanding.
A logical and ordered process can help you to do this by making sure that you address all of the critical
elements needed for a successful outcome.
Working through this process systematically will reduce the likelihood of overlooking important factors. Our
seven-step approach takes this into account:
Create a constructive environment.
Investigate the situation in detail.
Generate good alternatives.
Explore your options.
Select the best solution.
Evaluate your plan.
Communicate your decision, and take action. Let’s look
at each of these steps in detail.
Step 1: Create a Constructive Environment

Decisions can become complex when they involve or affect other people, so it helps to create a constructive
environment in which to explore the situation and weigh up your options.

Step 2: Investigate the Situation in Detail

Before you can begin to make a decision, you need to make sure that you fully understand your situation. It
may be that your objective can be approached in isolation, but it’s more likely that there are a number of
 interrelated factors to consider. Changes made in one department, for example, could have knock-on effects
elsewhere, making the change counter-productive.

Step 3: Generate Good Alternatives

The wider the options you explore, the better your final decision is likely to be.
Generating a number of different options may seem to make your decision more complicated at first, but
the act of coming up with alternatives forces you to dig deeper and look at the problem from different
angles.

Step 4: Explore Your Options

When you're satisfied that you have a good selection of realistic alternatives, it’s time to evaluate the
feasibility, risks and implications of each one.
Almost every decision involves some degree of risk. Use Risk Analysis to consider this objectively by
adopting a structured approach to assessing threats, and evaluating the probability of adverse events
occurring – and what they might cost to manage.
Step 5: Select the Best Solution

Once you’ve evaluated the alternatives, the next step is to make your decision. If one particular alternative is
clearly better than the rest, your choice will be obvious. However, if you still have several competing options, there
are plenty of tools that will help you decide between them.

Group Decisions:

If your decision is being made within a group, there are plenty of excellent tools and techniques to help you to
reach a group decision.
If the decision criteria are subjective, and it's critical that you gain consensus, Multi-Voting can help your team
reach an agreement.
When anonymity is important, decision-makers dislike one another, or there is a tendency for certain individuals to
dominate the process, use the Delphi Technique to reach a fair and impartial decision. This uses cycles of
anonymous, written discussion and argument, managed by a facilitator . Participants do not meet, and sometimes
they don't even know who else is involved.
Step 6: Evaluate Your Plan

With all the effort and hard work you’ve already invested in evaluating and selecting alternatives, it can be
tempting to forge ahead at this stage. But now, more than ever, is the time to "sense check" your decision.
Before you start to implement your decision, take a long, dispassionate look at it to be sure that you have been
thorough, and that common errors haven't crept into the process.
Step 7: Communicate Your Decision, and Take Action

Once you've made your decision, you need to communicate it to everyone affected by it in an engaging and
inspiring way.
Get them involved in implementing the solution by discussing how and why you arrived at your decision. The
more information you provide about risks and projected benefits, the more likely people will be to support your
decision.