Writing Composition
In this section, you will learn how to:
• construct an effective introduction that shows your understanding of the
question and the key issues to be discussed
• build key ideas into unified and coherent body paragraphs
• write a strong conclusion to end your essay effectively
Building the essay is the constructing and composing stage of the writing process. It
involves
• developing ideas logically in individual paragraphs
• including only ideas that are relevant to the central focus of the essay
• ensuring that each paragraph flows smoothly and logically to the end of the
essay
Introduction
• For undergraduate essays (between 700 and 3000
words)
• The introduction defines the topic, clarifies the context,
and prepares the reader for the discussion to come.
The introduction of an essay has the following features: The
background or context to the topic, the topic introduction, a thesis
statement, scope, and appropriate length.
Activity
Discuss the effects of the unemployment benefit system on the New Zealand
economy.
Which of the following features does the example introduction have?
context or background
scope (main discussion points)
topic introduction
thesis statement
appropriate length
Achieving coherence
What is coherence?
Coherence in a piece of writing means that the reader can easily understand it.
Coherence is about making everything flow smoothly. The reader can see that
everything is logically arranged and connected, and relevance to the central focus of the
essay is maintained throughout.
Two key aspects of coherence
• Cohesion: This relates to the linking of ideas within a sentence, the linking of
sentences (the ties between sentences) within a paragraph and the linking
between paragraphs.
• Unity: This relates to the question of relevance and maintaining the central focus
of a single paragraph and throughout the essay. A paragraph has unity when the
support sentences contribute to a greater understanding of the point made at the
beginning of the paragraph.
How can you achieve coherence in your writing?
We will examine four cohesive devices: (Note: the symbols in brackets will be used in
examples and practice activities.)
• Pronouns (P)
• Repetition (with exact word or parallel term/synonym) (R)
• Transitions (T)
• Parallelism (PllM): the use of similar grammatical forms and sentence structures
Four cohesive devices
This diagram shows how the four cohesive devices - pronouns, repetition, transitions
and parallelism - are used to create a coherent text.
.
Pronouns
Pronouns are useful cohesive devices because they make it unnecessary to repeat
words too often. Consider the following:
Repetitious referencing:
When Gillette first invented disposable razor blades, he found it very hard to sell the
disposable razor blades. He found it very hard to sell the disposable razor
blades because nobody had marketed a throw-away product before.
Better:
When Gillette first invented disposable razor blades, he found it very hard to
sell them. This was because nobody had marketed a throw-away product before.
Repetition
Repetition in a piece of writing does not always demonstrate cohesion. Study these
sentences:
Unnecessary repetition or limited vocabulary range:
The purpose of the simulation exercise is to simulate the racing performance of a racing car as
it will perform in an actual race.
Improved sentence:
The purpose of the simulation exercise is to recreate the performance of a car in an actual
race.
So, how does repetition as a cohesive device work?
When a pronoun is used, sometimes what the pronoun refers to (ie, the referent) is not
always clear. Clarity is achieved by repeating a key noun or synonym. Repetition is a
cohesive device used deliberately to improve coherence in a text.
In the following text, decide ifthe referent for the pronoun it is clear. Otherwise,
replace it with the key noun English where clarity is needed.
English has almost become an international language. Except for Chinese, more people
speak than any other language. Spanish is the official language of more
countries in the world, but more countries have as their official or unofficial
second language. More than 70% of the world's mail is written in
. is the primary language on the Internet. (p.23).
Text source: Oshima, A. and Hogue. A. (2006). Writing academic English (4th ed.). NY:
Pearson Education
Suggested improvement
English has almost become an international language. Except for Chinese, more people
speak it (clear reference; retain) than any other language. Spanish is the official
language of more countries in the world, but more countries have English (it is replaced
with a key noun) as their official or unofficial second language. More than 70% of the
world's mail is written in English (it is replaced with a key noun). It (clear reference;
retain) is the primary language on the Internet.
Sometimes, repetition of a key noun is preferred even when the reference is clear. In
the following text, it is clear that it refers to the key noun gold, but when used throughout
the text, the style becomes monotonous.
Sometimes, repetition of a key noun is preferred even when the reference is clear. In the
following text, it is clear that it refers to the key noun gold, but when used throughout the text,
the style becomes monotonous.
Example:
Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. First of all, it has a
lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. Therefore, it is suitable for jewellery, coins
and ornamental purposes. It never needs to be polished and will remain beautiful
forever. For example, a Macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it
was minted 23 centuries ago. Another characteristic of it is its usefulness to industry
and science. For many years, it has been used in hundreds of industrial applications,
such as photography and dentistry. Its most recent use is in astronauts’ suits.
Astronauts wear heat shields made from it for protection when they go outside
spaceships in space. In conclusion, it is treasured not only for its beauty but also its
utility. (p.22).
Text source: Oshima, A. and Hogue, A. (2006). Writing academic English (4th ed.). NY: Pearson Education
Transitions
Transitions are like traffic signals. They guide the reader from one idea to the next. They
signal a range of relationships between sentences, such as comparison, contrast,
example and result. Click here for a more comprehensive list of Transitions (Logical
Organisers).
Test yourself: How well do you understand transitions?
Which of the three alternatives should follow the transition or logical organiser in capital
letters to complete the second sentence?
1. In 2006, there was a proposal to build a stadium near the Auckland waterfront. IN
FACT,...
this proposal was turned down because there was simply insufficient land.
the government did not give its full support.
detailed plans had been drawn up to ascertain the site's viability.
2. The plans were submitted to the Auckland City Council for consideration in February
2006. HOWEVER,...
none of the plans met all the requirements.
the plans were all well-received.
several local bodies also submitted plans.
3. The main objection to the stadium proposal was the destruction of the waterfront
views. IN ADDITION,...
the estimated costs of building the stadium were deemed reasonable.
it would have been the best location for the rugby world cup.
it would adversely affect the busy shipping sector there.
4. The recreational needs of the waterfront residents were not ignored. ON THE
CONTRARY,...
letters were sent out well in advance to ascertain their views.
they were not consulted about the project.
they would also lose their privacy.
5. In the end, the final total costs were too high. CONSEQUENTLY...
the waterfront stadium proposal was a serious consideration.
the waterfront stadium proposal went into the second phase.
the waterfront stadium proposal was rejected in favour of an Eden Park upgrade.
Using transitions
Choose the most appropriate transition from the options given to complete the article:
Nuclear Hazards
There are three separate sources of hazards related to the use of nuclear reactions to supply us
with energy. , the radioactive material must travel from its place of manufacture to
the power station. the power stations themselves are solidly built, the containers
used for the transport of the material are not. Unfortunately, there are normally only two
methods of transport available, road or rail, and both of these involve close
contact with the general public, the routes are bound to pass near or through
heavily-populated areas.
, there is the problem of waste. All nuclear power stations produce wastes which
in most cases will remain radioactive for thousands of years. It is impossible to de-activiate
these wastes; , they must be disposed of carefully. , they may
be buried under the ground, dropped into disused mineshafts, or sunk in the sea. ,
these methods do not solve the problem; they merely store it, an earthquake
could crack open the containers.
, there is the problem of accidental exposure due to a leak or an explosion at the
power station. As with the other two hazards, this is extremely unlikely. it can
happen. Separately, and during short periods, these three types of risk are no great cause for
concern. Taken together, , and especially over much longer periods, the
probability of a disaster is extremely high. (p. 62).
Text source: Coe, N., Rycroft, R., & Ernest, P. (1983). Writing skills: A problem-solving approach for upper-intermediate and more advacned
students. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press.
Study the following examples:
Overuse:
If people stopped drinking, they might be able to prevent the onset of liver
disease. However, governments permit the production and sale of alcohol. So, they
should help in preventing this disease. Nevertheless, government resources are
limited.
Insufficient use:
If people stopped drinking, they might be able to prevent the onset of liver disease.
Governments permit the production and sale of alcohol. They should help in
preventing this disease. Government resources are limited.
Adequate use:
If people stopped drinking, they might be able to prevent the onset of liver disease. The
government should help in preventing this disease because they permit the production
and sale of alcohol. Government resources, however, are limited.
Practice
Identifying cohesive devices
Identify the type of cohesive device indicated by the numbered references 1-11. Write
the number followed by the name of the correct cohesive device
(Pronoun, Repetition, Pronoun+Repetition or Transition) in the submission box.
Answer key
1. Repetition of key noun 7. Transition
2. Repetition of key noun 8. Transition
3. Pronoun + Repetition 9. Repetition of key noun
4. Repetition with synonym 10. Pronoun
5. Pronoun 11. Pronoun + Repetition
6. Pronoun