📝 IELTS Writing Task 2 sample - Band 7.
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Nowadays, students sleep less than they used to in the past.
What do you think is the reason behind this? What are effects on
individuals
In today's world, sleep deprivation is becoming a common occurrence among
students, unlike in previous generations. Some argue about the reason behind
this trend and its effect on a person’s body. In my view, the current competitive
nature of academic settings mainly contributes to this phenomenon, which
can potentially result in various negative physiological and psychological
issues.
Admittedly, the modern structure of the academic curriculum requires
students to take up multiple courses and provide numerous outputs to
achieve higher grades of performance. Consequently, their busy schedules
and increased homework lead to a lower chance of sleep. The more teachers
encourage competition between peers, the more students would likely
prioritise activities over rest. Therefore, it is clear that the school set-up
contributes to their lack of sleep habits.
Furthermore, sleeping less than the recommended duration for optimal
development can affect the physical and mental aspects of the human body.
Firstly, it hinders the process of growth and recovery in our body. For example,
teenagers who stay up late are found to have a higher risk of obesity and
cognitive impairment. Finally, it promotes irritability and anxiety in one's mind.
This is greatly attributed to mental fatigue , which can make young individuals
have reactive emotions. Thus, having a good amount of sleep can prevent
potential side effects of fatigue.
To summarise, getting enough sleep is vital for all individuals , especially
students. However, these populations often give utmost priority to academic
activities , which results in physical limitations and mental distress.
Result: 7.0
Task Response (TR): Band 6.5–7.0
● ✅ You answered both parts of the question: causes (academic
pressure, curriculum demands, competition) and effects (physical &
psychological problems).
● ✅ Clear position maintained throughout (academic pressure = main
cause, negative consequences).
● ❌ Ideas are a bit limited — you mainly focused on academic workload
as the cause, ignoring other modern factors like technology, social
media, or lifestyle changes.
● ❌ Some examples are too general (e.g., “higher risk of obesity and
cognitive impairment” without strong support or clear source).
● Why not higher than 7? To reach Band 8, you’d need a wider range of
ideas, deeper analysis, and more specific evidence.
Coherence and Cohesion (CC): Band 7.0
● ✅ Clear essay structure: introduction → cause → effects →
conclusion.
● ✅ Paragraphing is logical and well signposted with connectors
(“Admittedly…”, “Furthermore…”, “To summarise…”).
● ❌ Cohesive devices are slightly repetitive and mechanical. Example:
“Firstly… Finally…” is a bit abrupt; transitions could be smoother.
● ❌ Some sentences are slightly wordy or awkward: “Therefore, it is clear
that the school set-up contributes to their lack of sleep habits.” (better:
“Therefore, the school environment clearly contributes to sleep
deprivation.”)
Lexical Resource (LR): Band 6.5–7.0
● ✅ Good range of academic vocabulary: phenomenon, curriculum,
cognitive impairment, irritability, psychological issues.
● ✅ Some precise word choices: physiological, mental fatigue, prioritise.
● ❌ Occasional awkwardness: “outputs” (unclear in this context), “school
set-up” (informal), “give utmost priority” (slightly unnatural).
● ❌ Limited variety in expressing “effects” — you repeat “affect” /
“negative” often instead of using more nuanced terms (e.g.,
“detrimental,” “harmful consequences,” “adverse impact”).
Grammatical Range and Accuracy (GRA): Band 6.5
● ✅ You use complex sentences with subordinators and relative clauses.
● ✅ Tense control is mostly accurate.
● ❌ Frequent small grammar slips:
○ “their lack of sleep habits” → incorrect phrasing (should be “their
poor sleep habits”).
○ “higher grades of performance” → unnatural (better: “higher
grades” or “better performance”).
○ “This is greatly attributed to mental fatigue , which can make
young individuals have reactive emotions.” → clumsy structure,
could be simplified.
● ❌ Overuse of commas in wrong places (e.g., “mental fatigue , which…”).
● ❌ Some sentences are unnecessarily long and reduce clarity.
Overall Band Score: 6.5–7.0
(= Average of TR 7.0, CC 7.0, LR 6.5–7.0, GRA 6.5 → ~6.75 → rounded to 7.0)