testing, testing

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at [Link]

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
Relationship: Alhaitham/Kaveh (Genshin Impact)
Character: Alhaitham (Genshin Impact), Kaveh (Genshin Impact)
Additional Tags: Top Kaveh/Bottom Alhaitham (Genshin Impact), Top Alhaitham/Bottom
Kaveh (Genshin Impact), Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch
Alhaitham/Kaveh (Genshin Impact), POV Alternating, Mutual Pining,
Getting Together, Kink Negotiation, Kink Exploration, Anal Sex, Oral
Sex, Finger Sucking, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Nipple Play, Bondage,
Dirty Talk, Verbal Humiliation, Blindfolds, Light Choking, Edging,
Rimming, Begging, Praise Kink, mild exhibitionism, Mutual
Masturbation, Sexual Roleplay, Sort Of, Kaveh in a Sexy Akademiya
Uniform, Spanking, Gags, Sensory Deprivation, Aftercare, Dom/sub,
Dom Alhaitham (Genshin Impact), Sub Kaveh (Genshin Impact), Dom
Kaveh (Genshin Impact), Sub Alhaitham (Genshin Impact), Possible
Spoilers for Alhaitham Story Quest, Partly Written Before 3.6 Update
(Genshin Impact), alhaitham and kaveh finally conduct an amicable joint
research project, if that's what they're calling it these days
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2023-04-05 Updated: 2023-04-26 Words: 35,759 Chapters:
2/12

testing, testing
by Lithopus

Summary

When Kaveh discovers that Alhaitham has been reading a book about human sexuality and
kinks, he generously offers to assist Alhaitham with some sexual exploration. It’s a risky
proposal, and one that could end very badly—thanks to their falling-out years ago, the two
of them have trust issues galore.

But it turns out that Kaveh and Alhaitham are surprisingly good at trust and communication
when it comes to sex…which raises some questions about the nature of their relationship,
and where exactly this whole experiment is leading them.

“Look,” Kaveh says, “if you’re going to approach sexual pleasure like an
experiment, most potential partners won’t take too kindly to the idea of you
having sex with them for science. Therefore, to spare all the poor people you’d
inevitably insult in your quest for data, I am willing to be that person.”

“How charitable of you,” Alhaitham says.

“And I assume that you’re somewhat comfortable with the idea of having sex
 with me,” Kaveh adds, “or else you wouldn’t have been so willing to have my
fingers in your mouth just now.”

Notes

The tags for this fic are mostly listed in the order that they appear, but some of them may
repeat or be slightly out of order! The chapter notes will specify which tags appear in each
chapter.
 Chapter 1
Chapter Summary

Kaveh folds his arms and glares at Alhaitham. “And what kind of book is
this, even? A guide on how to harass other people? A Treatise on New and
Creative Ways to Piss Off and Horrify Your Poor Beleaguered Roommate,
perhaps?”

Alhaitham’s expression is neutral, but there’s a blush tinting his cheeks.

“Let’s see,” Kaveh says, checking the front cover of the book.
“Considerations on Human Sexuality and Arousal: A psycholog…” He
chokes on the rest of the title. “A psychological exploration of common
and uncommon triggers?!”

“Congratulations,” Alhaitham says. “You’re literate enough to read a book

title.”

Chapter Notes

in this chapter: finger sucking, hand jobs, very light dom/sub undertones

See the end of the chapter for more notes

When Kaveh emerges from his room after three hours of nonstop sketching, he expects to find
Alhaitham sitting on the couch reading a book—and that’s more or less what he finds, except for
two key differences.

One is that the book is abandoned on Alhaitham’s lap, about to topple off his knees.

The other is that instead of reading, Alhaitham is sucking on two of his fingers, lips stretched wide
as he contemplates the far wall.

That sight sends a jolt of arousal straight to Kaveh’s cock, so intense that it pisses him off. “What
the fuck?” he says.

Alhaitham’s eyes flick to him, and he slowly removes his fingers from his mouth. A string of saliva
clings to his skin, dripping down his knuckles, and he frowns at the mess, perhaps realizing that he
has no towel to wipe it off. “Do you need something?” he asks, as if Kaveh hadn’t just walked in
on him sucking his damn fingers like he's in an erotic novel.

“Yes, in fact,” Kaveh says. “What I need, Alhaitham, is an explanation for why you’re engaging in
borderline masturbatory activities in our living room.” When Alhaitham coolly raises an eyebrow,
Kaveh snaps, “Oh, are you going to tell me there’s a completely innocent reason for why you were
practically gagging on your fingers just now?”
“I don’t see why it’s your business,” Alhaitham says. “And it’s not ‘our’ living room. It’s mine. I’m
simply allowing you to use it, along with the rest of the house.”

“By that logic, should I worry that I’ll walk in here one day and find you sitting here with your
dick out? Do I need to confine myself to my bedroom and exit the house through the window, to
protect my eyes? Or perhaps you’ll say that my bedroom is technically yours, too, and that
nowhere in this godforsaken house is safe?”

“I have no intention of masturbating in your bedroom.” Scowling, Alhaitham wipes his fingers on
his pants and picks his book up, signalling that the conversation is over.

Kaveh suspects that Alhaitham didn’t rule out the other options solely for the sake of riling him up;
he doubts that he’ll actually get an eyeful of Alhaitham’s dick the next time he walks into the
kitchen for a glass of water. But he won’t take the bait. He’s more mature than that. “What were
you even trying to do, then?”

“I was verifying something I read in this book,” Alhaitham answers. “You should try doing that
more often, instead of believing everything you’re told.”

“I do not believe everything I’m told,” Kaveh snaps. “It’s called giving people the benefit of the
doubt, Alhaitham. You should try doing that more often.” He folds his arms and glares at
Alhaitham, who is pointedly staring at the book instead of Kaveh. “And ‘something you read’?
What kind of book is that, even? A guide on how to harass other people? A Treatise on New and
Creative Ways to Piss Off and Horrify Your Poor Beleaguered Roommate, perhaps?”

Alhaitham reaches up to fiddle with his headphones. Although Kaveh figures that he hasn’t
actually turned on the noise-cancelling function—since Alhaitham prefers to drive Kaveh insane
by ignoring him the old-fashioned way—he can’t be certain.

Huffing, Kaveh marches across the room and snatches the book from Alhaitham’s hands, holding
it open to the page he was reading. He doesn’t check the title right away, though. He keeps his eyes
carefully trained on Alhaitham’s face, searching for those subtle flickers of emotion that Alhaitham
doesn’t always manage to immediately hide.

Currently, Alhaitham’s expression is neutral—but there’s a blush pinkening his cheeks, and it
seems like he’s clenching his jaw.

Ha. He can try to act unruffled all he wants; Kaveh sees through him like a set of muslin curtains.

“Let’s see,” Kaveh says, flipping over the book to read the title. “Considerations on Human
Sexuality and Arousal: A psycholog…” He chokes on the rest of the title. “A psychological
exploration of common and uncommon triggers?!”

“Congratulations,” Alhaitham says. “You’re literate enough to read a book title.”

“Oh my gods.” Kaveh flips the book over and checks what page Alhaitham was on. “Finger
sucking. You really were…oh.” He glances between the book and Alhaitham’s unimpressed stare,
trying to wrap his mind around the fact that not only was Alhaitham reading about triggers for
arousal, but imagining them for himself.

“Are you done gawking at my book? It’s not as if you’ve never seen one before.” Alhaitham rolls
his eyes. “Snatching things from other people’s hands like a child stealing toys. You’re as uncouth
as ever.”

“I—me? I’m uncouth? I’m not the one testing out kinks in the middle of the living room!”
Kaveh can’t get that blasted image out of his mind: Alhaitham sitting casually on the couch, fingers
shoved in his mouth, looking not the least bit uncomfortable. He wonders what Alhaitham would
sound like if he tried to speak around those fingers, if he moaned around those fingers. Wonders
what his lips would look like stretched around three instead of two, what he’d look like with drool
dripping down his chin, what he’d look like with an actual cock in his mouth.

Fuck. Kaveh is turned on now, and it’s all Alhaitham’s fault.

Infuriating.

Kaveh waves the book at Alhaitham, hoping to distract from any potential developments below his
beltline. “And what kind of test was that, anyway? Sitting there all stone-faced, like a patient
waiting while the doctor depresses his tongue!” Alhaitham really had done it so stiffly, like a rusty
ruin guard taking its first steps after years of dormancy. “It’s not just the physical act, you know.
There’s a mental aspect to it, too. And some things you can’t replicate without other people.
Doesn’t your book mention that? Or did you not get that far, before you decided to shove your
stupid hand in your mouth?”

“I’m aware,” Alhaitham says. Kaveh doesn’t think he is. “It seems that you’re very bothered by the
idea of me sucking my fingers. Is there a reason you’re so worked up?”

Like hell is Kaveh going to admit the truth. “Because it was utterly passionless! Leave it to you to
take sex and arousal of all things, and perform like a machine!” He slams the book down on the
coffee table and steps closer, until he’s looming over Alhaitham’s spot on the couch. “Ugh! You—
you’re so desperately curious, huh, that you had to immediately test it out, right here in the living
room? It’s that urgent? Well, then, since you insist that I should put more effort into verifying
things, allow me to help.”

Fueled by an irascible horniness, Kaveh grips Alhaitham’s chin tightly with one hand. To his
shock, Alhaitham doesn’t jerk away. He stares up at Kaveh levelly and waits, hands resting on his
thighs.

Oh. Fuck. He looks so good like this.

Kaveh can’t stand it. Alhaitham is doing this on purpose. He’s trying to rile Kaveh up, and it’s
working, because his skin feels like it’s been dusted with flaming flower pollen, and he’s coming
to regret his choice of tight pants today.

“Open,” Kaveh says. The moment Alhaitham parts his lips—perhaps to say something, Kaveh
doesn’t know, doesn’t care—Kaveh shoves two fingers into his mouth and presses down on his
tongue. He holds Alhaitham’s gaze and slides his fingers further in, until Alhaitham’s lips brush
against his second knuckles.

Alhaitham’s eyes are half-lidded as he breathes heavily through his nose, jaw stretched wide to
make room for Kaveh’s fingers. His entire face flushes red, and he sits perfectly still aside from the
rise and fall of his chest.

Kaveh nudges his fingers against Alhaitham’s top lip, and Alhaitham closes his mouth around
them. His tongue swirls over the pads of Kaveh’s fingers, warm, wet, soft, and Kaveh bites back a
moan at the feeling.

He’s hard. He’s definitely hard.

Eyes wide, he yanks his fingers from Alhaitham’s mouth. A trail of spit clings to Alhaitham’s chin,
and Kaveh’s knees nearly buckle at the sight. “Th-there!” he says, voice pitching. He frantically
wipes his hand on his shirt. “That—that’s how you should be verifying what you read, if you’re
really trying to, ah…conduct a proper inquiry.”

Both of them are silent for a long moment. Then Alhaitham furrows his brow and asks, “You’re
suggesting I do that for every entry in the book?”

Kaveh glances at the tome—not small by any means, archons, it’s enormous—and nearly faints at
the thought. Help Alhaitham enact that entire book? There’s no way he’d survive that much sex
with Alhaitham. He’s already losing his mind just from seeing Alhaitham with fingers in his mouth.
He might legitimately go mad if nudity is involved.

Then again, Alhaitham probably isn’t talking about experimenting with Kaveh specifically. He’s
likely just asking if Kaveh thinks he should involve a partner of some sort.

“As it is,” Alhaitham adds, “I’m not certain your participation was particularly elucidating. It’s
difficult to become aroused when I don’t know where your hand has been, and therefore can’t help
but wonder what sort of contaminants you just introduced into my mouth.”

Difficult to become aroused? What a lie. Kaveh had seen how turned on Alhaitham looked,
sucking on his fingers with that dazed expression on his face. In fact, now that he looks closer,
Kaveh notices that Alhaitham’s hands have moved to strategically rest over his groin.

Over his groin. As if he’s hiding an erection. Does Alhaitham think that Kaveh is blind?

“Where my hand has been?” Kaveh echoes. “Nowhere, besides your mouth!” Oh, archons, his
hand was in Alhaitham’s mouth. His hand was in Alhaitham’s mouth. Why did he do that? What on
earth possessed him to do that? “I literally just washed some graphite off my hands before coming
in here, so they’re perfectly clean. Feel free to masturbate to this memory later without fretting over
germs.”

“It sounds like you’re projecting onto me. Are those your own plans for later? You’re clearly
worked up in more ways than one.” Alhaitham’s eyes don’t stray from Kaveh’s face, but from his
words, it’s fairly clear that he’s noticed the protruding fabric near Kaveh’s thigh.

“I’m not—no!” Kaveh tries to subtly adjust his pants so that his interest is hidden, and only
succeeds in making things worse when the fabric rubs against him in exactly the wrong way. (Or,
well, exactly the right way, if the circumstances were different.) “Argh! And—wh-why do you
care what my plans are, anyway? Hoping to steal me for your own devices, is that it?”

“Is that an offer?”

“What?!” Kaveh splutters. “I—you—you’re not going to make this a condition of my rent, are you,
you bastard?”

Alhaitham gives him a flat look.

And, well, okay. Even Alhaitham isn’t that bad. Nor would he need to resort to such measures to
have sex with Kaveh, because Kaveh has more or less lusted after Alhaitham ever since they met.
(And only lusted. Never pined. He certainly hasn’t pined, because he would never be foolish
enough to pine for Alhaitham. Even an ocean’s worth of wine couldn’t make him that stupid.)

“And why would I offer?” Kaveh says. “I don’t see why you’d want my help. You would just
complain the whole time, the way you whined about my perfectly clean hands. But, you know, if
you need another body, I know one or two reputable brothels that you could try. I’ve never had to
resort to them, of course, since I’m charming enough to land partners the conventional way—but,
well, given your personality, I don’t think you’d be too successful if you went that route.”

Silently, he prays that Alhaitham does want his help. Kaveh is, in fact, interested…but if
Alhaitham is going to feign indifference about all of this, then two can play that game.

“Being with a stranger would be ineffectual,” Alhaitham says. “I wouldn’t be comfortable with
someone unfamiliar to me, which would in turn skew my observations.” His expression hardens.
“And is your habit of philandering really something to brag about?”

Habit? Habit? Kaveh hasn’t even gotten laid once since he moved in with Alhaitham! He can’t
very well bring partners back to the house—if Alhaitham takes issue with Kaveh’s late-night
projects, then he’d definitely object to late-night trysts—and even if that weren’t an issue, Kaveh
has been far too busy trying to pay off his debt to scout around for a lover.

(Never mind that he’s refused the advances of at least a dozen attractive men who have invited him
over, and instead always hurries home to catch Alhaitham before his ridiculously early bedtime.
That’s not because he prefers Alhaitham. He’s just doing his duty as a roommate. Good roommates
tell each other goodnight. Everyone knows that.)

But Kaveh isn’t about to correct Alhaitham, because he refuses to admit that he’s experiencing a
dry spell, or that the two of them are currently getting the same amount of dick. “Well, if a brothel
won’t do,” Kaveh says, “then you can search your surprisingly large circle of friends. Oh, I know
—maybe you can commission that traveler friend of yours.”

He hopes Alhaitham can’t tell that he’s gnashing his teeth. Because that traveler is cute and all, but
if Alhaitham wants a blond so badly, Kaveh is clearly the better choice.

“You’re very fixated on the idea of me paying someone for sex,” Alhaitham says.

Yes, Kaveh nearly blurts out, because I’m worried that you’ll go that route instead of choosing me!

“Well,” Kaveh says, “you always love to brag about your financial freedom, so I assumed that
you’d have no qualms about paying for that sort of thing.”

“Weren’t you just accusing me of being utterly passionless?” Alhaitham asks. “And yet you’re
telling me to reduce sex to a monetary transaction. Do I have that correct?”

“I—well—no, I just…”

Alhaitham’s steady gaze is unsettling. It’s like he’s challenging Kaveh to offer the final alternative
and set himself up for rejection.

Not that Kaveh cares if Alhaitham rejects him. It’s not as if he feels anything toward the man
besides mild to severe annoyance, depending on the day.

“That’s not it,” Kaveh says, finally. “I was simply offering the options that you were more likely to
choose, before suggesting the one that you’re most likely to reject.”

“Which is…?”

“Which is,” Kaveh says, “that…I…well, I’d like some assurances against any impromptu
inquiries, you know, so that I don’t walk into the kitchen one day and discover that you’ve
suddenly decided to test out exhibitionism. So, ah, for some semblance of predictability, and seeing
as I’m a fellow scholar, I would…perhaps…that is, I could possibly be persuaded to…”
“So you are offering.”

“Yes!” Kaveh snaps, crossing his arms. “I’m offering to help. Take it or leave it.”

Now that he’s actually offered, he realizes that he doesn’t even know what he wants. He hates the
idea of Alhaitham turning him down—but the idea of Alhaitham actually accepting fills Kaveh
with a dreadful electric feeling that is beyond words.

“And this is a legitimate offer,” Alhaitham clarifies.

“Wha—would I give you something this embarrassing to hold over my head as a joke?” Kaveh
demands. “Do you think I’d risk you bringing this up over a card game with Tighnari and Cyno,
just for the sake of being funny?”

“Possibly. You tend not to think before you speak.”

“And how much did you think before shoving two fingers in your mouth in the middle of our living
room?”

“My living room,” Alhaitham corrects, incorrectly. “And I could ask you the same question,
regarding what you did with those perfectly clean fingers of yours.”

He’s so utterly aggravating. Had Kaveh actually found him attractive five minutes ago? Clearly a
terrible lapse in judgment.

And of course Kaveh hadn’t thought before shoving his fingers in Alhaitham’s mouth! If he’d
spent even a fraction of a second on contemplation, he never would have done it. (Technically, he
had thought to himself, Wow, Alhaitham would look extremely sexy with my fingers in his mouth
—but that is a thought so terribly stupid that it shouldn’t qualify as actual thinking.)

“You know, actually,” Kaveh seethes, “I thought so far ahead that I specifically washed my hands
on the very slight chance that someone would want to suck on my fingers! Isn’t that forethoughtful
of me? In fact, Alhaitham, I’ll be sure to keep my fingers extra clean from now on, just for you.”

Alhaitham squints at him quizzically, and Kaveh’s face burns with embarrassment. “You’re
absurd,” he remarks. “And you should keep your hands clean, regardless. Or do you eat shawarma
wraps with your feet?”

“Look,” Kaveh says, “if you’re going to approach sexual pleasure like an experiment, most
potential partners won’t take too kindly to the idea of you having sex with them for science.
Therefore, to spare all the poor people you’d inevitably insult in your quest for data, I am willing to
be that person.”

“How charitable of you.”

“Besides,” Kaveh adds, “I’m definitely familiar to you, and I assume that you’re somewhat
comfortable with me, or else you wouldn’t have been so willing to have my fingers in your mouth
just now.”

That, at least, Alhaitham can’t deny. He’d had a chance to knock Kaveh’s hand away, or tell him to
stop, or stand up and walk out of the room—but instead he’d sat there obediently and sucked on
Kaveh’s fingers, lips round and wet, eyes hazy with pleasure…

Oh, damn it, Kaveh is definitely going to dream about that tonight.
“Um, wait,” Kaveh says, faltering. “You were willing, right? Because if you weren’t—”

“The answer to that should be obvious.” Despite his unaffected expression, Alhaitham’s face is
flushed all the way down his neck. “To clarify: you’re offering to partake in a list of sexual acts
with me, in order to figure out which ones I find arousing?”

Should Kaveh take it all back? Shield what remains of his dignity? Claim that it was a poor joke,
and resign himself to merciless teasing at some point in the future?

“Yes,” Kaveh says, somehow without his voice cracking. “I am offering that, yes.”

He braces himself as he waits for Alhaitham’s response. Honestly, he can’t tell if Alhaitham is
actually considering it or not. In the past, Alhaitham has managed to trick him like this. Sometimes
he’ll pretend to entertain an idea for a few minutes or days, only to bluntly shut it down later on.

“Why?” Alhaitham asks. “Even your gratuitous generosity wouldn’t extend to something like this.”

Why? Because Kaveh has been attracted to Alhaitham for years, and he can’t stand the thought of
someone else having their way with him. “Because…I, um…have also been wanting to explore
kinks.”

“Weren’t you just bragging that you could easily find any number of partners on your own?”

“Yes, but…”

But none of them would be you.

Wait, where did that thought come from? That’s not why Kaveh has been turning down the
advances of nice, handsome men. That has nothing to do with his attraction to Alhaitham.

“This is a bigger commitment than a one-night stand,” Kaveh says. “And it requires a lot of trust,
so I think it’s better to do this sort of thing with someone you know well.”

“I see.” Alhaitham’s eyes bore into him for a long moment, unreadable. Slowly, he drags his gaze
down Kaveh’s body—lingering very pointedly at Kaveh’s crotch, the bastard—before letting it
wander back up to his face. “And if I accept your offer?”

Kaveh tries to tamp down the eagerness building in his chest. He shouldn’t get his hopes up just
yet, since Alhaitham could still be toying with him. “Then I’d say you have the rest of the week to
draw up a list of kinks that you want to test, and we’ll discuss from there.”

Silently, he applauds himself on his excellent delivery. Smooth, casual, assured. Just like assigning
homework to his students at the Akademiya—except Kaveh would never assign a kink list to his
students, dear gods.

But a roleplay with him as the experienced professor, and Alhaitham as an innocent student…wait,
no. He can’t let his mind go there.

(It’s too late. His mind has gone there.)

“Hm.” Alhaitham raises his eyebrows, as if to say, What a novel proposal—and then he grabs his
book off the coffee table and reopens it.

After several moments of silence, it becomes clear that he’s gone back to reading.

“Wha—that’s it?” Kaveh demands. “Just hm?!”

“I’m reading,” Alhaitham says, rather unnecessarily.

“And I’m still talking to you!”

Alhaitham peers over the book at him. “How exactly am I supposed to provide you with a list if I
haven’t finished the book?”

At the mention of The List, Kaveh’s mind turns as fuzzy as tri-lakshana fluff. “Y-you…list…” His
eyes drift down to Alhaitham’s newly-exposed lap, where—oh.

That’s—there’s a—there’s a distinct bulge in the tight fabric of his pants.

Alhaitham is turned on.

Alhaitham is turned on by the idea of testing kinks with Kaveh.

“Right!” Kaveh practically shouts. “I—I’ll leave you to, uh—that. Happy reading! Good night!”

He scurries back to his room and slams the door shut behind himself, breathing rapidly. His heart
pounds in his chest as his mind concocts a dozen different scenarios involving Alhaitham’s naked
body—and then two dozen, and three dozen, until Kaveh is fairly certain he’s well surpassed one
hundred.

Alhaitham. Oh, gods, Alhaitham.

Alhaitham writhing below him as Kaveh nips and sucks at his chest. Alhaitham yanking at his hair
while Kaveh licks his cock. Alhaitham sitting on his lap, begging to be touched while Kaveh trails
an oiled finger along his ass and teases him. Alhaitham sprawled on the bed with his wrists bound,
Alhaitham glaring up at him with his infuriating mouth gagged, Alhaitham, Alhaitham, Alhaitham.

Kaveh will absolutely not be getting any sleep tonight.

For several days, Kaveh and Alhaitham settle back into their usual routine.

Kaveh stays up too late working on projects, and Alhaitham complains about the noise. They eat a
fairly amicable breakfast together, and then Alhaitham leaves for work, abandoning some sort of
mess for Kaveh to clean up (usually dishes). Alhaitham goes to Lambad’s Tavern in the evening
with Kaveh tagging along, Alhaitham pays for both their drinks, and eventually the two walk home
while bickering together. Alhaitham goes to bed stupidly early, and Kaveh stays up stupidly late.

Their typical cycle, on repeat.

But there are differences.

As they sit and eat breakfast, Alhaitham’s eyes linger on him several seconds too long. When
Kaveh stands at the counter pouring himself a glass of water, Alhaitham suddenly slides up next to
him and starts washing a dish, his hips brushing against Kaveh’s. At Lambad’s, Kaveh drinks half
as much as usual, and when it’s time to leave, Alhaitham rests a hand on Kaveh’s shoulder or wrist,
his touch almost ticklish—until Alhaitham murmurs let’s go home, and those low words make
Kaveh feel like his blood is made of pure arak.
And a few times, Kaveh doesn’t stay up late working—he stays up late whispering curses under his
breath, stroking himself beneath the bedcovers and gasping Alhaitham’s name.

(If Alhaitham hears those noises, he doesn’t complain.)

Worst of all, Kaveh keeps seeing Alhaitham around the house with that blasted kink book. From
the peeks he’s gotten, he can see that Alhaitham is steadily making progress—but since when is
Alhaitham such a slow reader? Usually he finishes a book within forty-eight hours of starting it.

Ugh. He probably already finished it. He’s probably just pretending that he hasn’t, to torment
Kaveh.

Because Alhaitham is, without a doubt, trying to torture him. Five days after the finger sucking
incident, the bastard nearly gives Kaveh a heart attack when he turns to him in broad daylight and
hands him a folded-up piece of paper.

“By the way, here’s the list,” Alhaitham says casually.

Kaveh’s grip tightens so much that the paper crumples. “The—the list?” he hisses. “Now?”

They’re literally standing right outside Puspa Café. There are people everywhere. Is Alhaitham
really tactless enough to give him the list now of all times?

Alhaitham raises an eyebrow. “I figured we could go shopping, since we’re both free.”

“Shopping?” Kaveh practically shrieks. Several passersby glance at him oddly. “Just—just like
that? No preamble? We’re jumping straight to shopping?”

“There’s no need to be so worked up,” Alhaitham says, forehead wrinkling. “I wasn’t aware the
topic needed that much of an introduction.”

“Are you serious?” Kaveh waves the piece of paper at Alhaitham. “You can’t just hand me
something like this without warning!”

To his frustration, Alhaitham’s expression remains placid. “Noted.”

A few minutes later, Alhaitham leads Kaveh to Treasures Street and stops in front of a seemingly
innocuous vegetable stall. Turning to Kaveh, he asks, “Do you have the list?”

“The…this list?” Kaveh asks, withdrawing the folded piece of paper from his pocket. “Why on
earth would that be relevant here?”

Alhaitham frowns. “Have you never seen a grocery list before, Kaveh?”

Kaveh stares at him, mouth agape. Wonders if he has somehow misheard. Wonders if grocery list
is a codeword, and the merchant has been running a secret sex shop out of a warehouse this whole
time, the way Dori and her employees use a secret language to discuss canned knowledge.

Slowly, Kaveh unfolds the list and reads it.

1 bag of rice
1/4 kg lentils
4 tomatoes
1 kg ground beef
turmeric
 5 peaches
2 mangoes

“I’m going to murder you,” he tells Alhaitham.

“How many tomatoes?” Alhaitham asks.

Kaveh legitimately second-guesses his desire to have sex with the man.

Two days later, though, Alhaitham does approach Kaveh in the study with a piece of paper in hand.

“What’s that?” Kaveh asks, leaning back in his chair. “Another grocery list?”

“It’s a list of every sexual activity listed in the book,” Alhaitham says. Kaveh’s eyes are about to
pop out of his skull until he adds, “Mark the ones you’re comfortable with trying, and then I’ll
compare our answers to come up with a final list.”

Without waiting for a response, he deposits the paper on Kaveh’s desk and leaves the room.

Kaveh sets aside the sketch he’s been working on, takes a deep breath, and slides Alhaitham’s list
to the center of his desk.

Instantly, he’s overwhelmed by the columns of words in front of him. It’s like staring at an
unalphabetized roster of the entire Akademiya student body and trying to find one person’s name—
except, of course, Alhaitham did alphabetize this list, because of course he did.

Kaveh’s eyes leap from one point on the page to another. Bondage. Degradation. Begging.
Roleplay. Hair pulling. Dirty talk. Words upon words upon words, some incredibly general, others
surprisingly specific. There must be at least one hundred terms on this page, if not more.

It’s too much.

And this isn’t just a list. It’s a to-do list. It’s a list of activities that Kaveh and Alhaitham might
actually act out.

Does this mean that Alhaitham is officially agreeing to experiment with Kaveh? Somehow, despite
the list in front of him—the list that is literally in Alhaitham’s handwriting—Kaveh finds that
difficult to believe.

Why would Alhaitham want to have sex with him? Does he even find Kaveh attractive, or is it just
because Kaveh is the most convenient option? In fact, what if Alhaitham is so unattracted to
Kaveh that the entire process fails, because he isn’t turned on by a single thing Kaveh tries?

Kaveh can envision that scenario all too easily: him, stripped bare in front of Alhaitham, doing his
best to make him feel pleasure…all while Alhaitham lies there with a disinterested expression, his
dick immutably flaccid, his voice reciting belittlements and criticisms.

Dread curls in Kaveh’s stomach, and he curls over the desk, squeezing his eyes shut.

No. No, he can’t think like that. Besides, Alhaitham probably wouldn’t go to all of this trouble
unless he thought that he stood a decent chance of acquiring some new knowledge for himself. He
rarely engages in pursuits that seem unlikely to yield worthwhile results.

See, Kaveh tells himself. Alhaitham thinks that sex with you is likely to yield worthwhile results.

Of course, that thought is not nearly as encouraging as Alhaitham thinks you’re extremely
attractive or Alhaitham wants you to rail him into the mattress…but it will do.

And hadn’t Alhaitham seemed somewhat interested, when he sucked Kaveh’s fingers the other
day? The answer to that should be obvious, he’d said, when Kaveh asked if he was willing to have
his fingers in his mouth.

Ugh. Nothing with that man is ever obvious, except for the fact that he’s a raging asshole ninety
percent of the time.

“Focus,” Kaveh mutters, picking up his pen. He can start by finding the kinks that he absolutely
doesn’t want to try and crossing those off. That will make the rest of the list less overwhelming.

He accomplishes that part without any trouble, marking down a few as probably not, but
negotiable. Then he sits back in his chair to regard the remaining items on the list.

There are still so many. Literally dozens of options.

Kaveh doesn’t want to seem desperate by leaving too many options open—but, well, isn’t
Alhaitham going to check this list against his own? Just because Kaveh indicates an interest in
something, that doesn’t mean it will necessarily be included on the final list.

Except…what if Kaveh marks yes for something Alhaitham is absolutely repulsed by? Will
Alhaitham judge him if their lists don’t completely line up? Will he mock Kaveh for expressing an
interest in something that he thinks is foolish?

Kaveh reflects on how he told Alhaitham that this sort of thing requires a lot of trust. It’s better to
do this sort of thing with someone you know well, he’d said. And yet, it’s precisely because he
knows Alhaitham so well that he’s having trouble trusting him. He keeps expecting Alhaitham to
somehow turn this into an opportunity to mock him.

Maybe this is unwise. Maybe he should go find Alhaitham and call the whole thing off.

Kaveh hums to himself, his eyes trailing across the remaining items on the list. He wonders what
Alhaitham’s list looks like—what Alhaitham wants to do with Kaveh, what he wants to do to him.

As Kaveh reads over the list, his imagination supplies plenty of possibilities.

Dominance and submissiveness. Kaveh has always been curious about that dynamic, since he and
his partners tend to be fairly easygoing with each other. He’s not sure which role he’d prefer,
though. His pride hates the idea of submitting to Alhaitham—but, well, that’s bound to be how it
works out. Alhaitham would certainly have no trouble bullying Kaveh and telling him what to do.
He already does that constantly. He’d be a natural.

Would it even work, though? Kaveh tries to envision it: Alhaitham, fully clothed with Kaveh naked
in front of him, ordering him to drop to his knees. Once Kaveh knelt, Alhaitham would grip his
chin and murmur, Stay still. He’d make him wait there while he read a book, until finally, he’d
beckon Kaveh closer and tell him to suck his cock, fingers curled tightly in his hair. Then he’d
force Kaveh to sit on his lap and ride his cock, refusing to let Kaveh come until he properly begged
for it. And, oh, Kaveh would beg: Please, Alhaitham, please, let me come, gods, let me come on
your cock, it feels so good, please.

You can come, Alhaitham would say, fingers digging into Kaveh’s waist, but I won’t stop fucking
you until I finish, so don’t blame me if it ends up being too much.

Oh, gods. Kaveh’s face burns at the thought, and his cock presses against the fabric of his pants,
half-hard.

Alright, fine. So it would probably work. But Kaveh would love to see the alternative, with
Alhaitham reduced to a whimpering, incoherent mess. Fucking himself on Kaveh’s cock, whining
for permission to come, so desperate that his clever mouth can only pant and drool.

Except Kaveh highly doubts that Alhaitham would ever be willing to try that headspace. He’s too
stubborn and prideful. He’d never even entertain the notion of letting Kaveh dominate him.

Still, he’ll mark it down as a yes, and pray that Alhaitham is open-minded.

Praise kink. Well, Kaveh already knows that he has one of those, but he wonders whether
Alhaitham does, too. While the man is certainly egotistical, Kaveh can count on one hand the
number of times Alhaitham has properly appreciated a compliment that someone gave him. If
Kaveh tried to praise him during sex, his compliments would probably fail to meet Alhaitham’s
ridiculous standards and have zero effect on him.

And although Kaveh would love for Alhaitham to praise him, he just can’t imagine that happening.
Alhaitham only ever compliments him sarcastically. He’d probably prefer to insult Kaveh during
sex.

Fortunately for Alhaitham, Kaveh is marking down degradation and humiliation as yeses, too—so
Alhaitham can have his fun that way, even if Kaveh is more partial to praise.

(He’s still definitely voting yes for praise kink, though, in case Alhaitham feels uncharacteristically
generous.)

Bondage. Alhaitham is almost guaranteed to be interested in that, since it’s a classic kink, but
Kaveh wonders how he’ll want to approach it. Would he prefer to tie up Kaveh, or to be tied up
himself?

Really, Kaveh is struggling to imagine Alhaitham giving up any control during sex. He prefers to
be in charge of himself; he’s not the sort of person to follow orders or listen to authority. He’d
always skipped classes as an Akademiya student, and even now that he’s employed, he rarely
actually shows up to his office. The only time Alhaitham doesn’t like to be in charge is when the
alternative seems like more of a hassle, like when he stepped down from being Acting Grand Sage
because the position was too troublesome.

Wait. Alhaitham isn’t going to be a pillow prince, is he? Kaveh absolutely refuses to have sex with
a slacker.

But sadly, that’s the easiest thing to envision yet: Alhaitham lounging in bed with loose limbs,
insisting that Kaveh do all the work. You offered to help me explore kinks, Alhaitham would say.
You never specified that I needed to be an active participant.

“Ugh,” Kaveh mutters. “Insufferable. Well, maybe I will tie you up and do all the work. See how
you like that.”

Despite his irritation, that image sends a pulse of arousal straight to his groin. Alhaitham would
look so pretty trussed up with rope—arms and legs bound, unable to move as Kaveh flips him onto
his stomach and fucks him senseless. Desperately trying to muffle his moans against the pillows,
and writhing as he attempts to escape Kaveh’s gaze, his ass on full display.

Spanking. Kaveh isn’t sure about that one. He’s never tried it before, since he always felt too
embarrassed to ask his partners. In theory, it could be exciting…but it also could be incredibly
awkward.

He taps his pen against the page, trying to imagine what that would look like. Alhaitham might
drape Kaveh over his lap and shove his pants down, running a palm along his bare skin. Maybe
he’d scold Kaveh for running up a tab at Lambad’s again, prompting him to retort—and then
Alhaitham’s palm would crack against his ass, hard enough to sting, making Kaveh jolt from the
impact. Then another smack, and another. And if Kaveh tried to squirm away, Alhaitham would
press one hand to his back and hold him down, pinning Kaveh so that he could feel Alhaitham
getting hard beneath him, and…

Kaveh shudders. Why is that image so damn erotic? Could he really get off from being spanked by
his infuriating roommate? Shouldn’t that idea be ridiculous and annoying, at most?

Glancing down, he realizes that he’s pressed his pen in place for too long, too hard, making a large
blot of ink bleed across the word spanking. It makes it look like Kaveh was trying to black out the
word.

Kaveh instantly snatches his pen off the page. No, no—he definitely wants to try that one. He can’t
let Alhaitham think that he crossed it off.

Frantically, Kaveh scribbles MY INK SPILLED BUT THIS ONE IS A YES, and instantly feels his
face burn with shame, because now he seems far too enthusiastic about either spanking or being
spanked.

That makes him wonder: would Alhaitham let Kaveh spank him? Surely not. Alhaitham would
probably find the idea silly.

Oral sex. Anal sex. Yes, yes, a thousand times, yes. Kaveh wants Alhaitham’s dick inside him, any
way possible. Of course, he also wants his dick inside Alhaitham, but he’ll have to wait and find
out where Alhaitham stands on that issue. Perhaps Alhaitham doesn’t even want to have penetrative
sex at all…which is fine, as long as Alhaitham is amenable to oral sex. Kaveh hasn’t forgotten how
tantalizing Alhaitham looked with those fingers in his mouth. He’s certain he’d look even prettier
sucking on cock.

Kaveh’s skin feels warm, and there’s a feeling of molten need building in his gut. He’s tempted to
abandon the list and lose himself to his fantasies, guiding himself to satisfaction with his hand.

It almost pisses him off. He really shouldn’t be this worked up over the idea of sex with Alhaitham,
of all people.

Kaveh quickly reviews the list one last time—cringing once again at how he might as well have
written PLEASE SPANK ME!!! in the margins—and then he forces himself to wait for the ink to
dry.

By now, the sun has sunk below the horizon, leaving dusk light to seep through the windows of the
study. Although Alhaitham has probably started getting ready for bed at this point, he should still
be awake. As long as Kaveh doesn’t dally, he can catch Alhaitham before he goes to sleep.

Once the ink seems dry and Kaveh’s erection has mostly gone away, he plucks up the list and
leaves in search of Alhaitham. It takes most of his willpower not to crumple up the paper like a
scrapped design and throw it in the trash, but he resists the temptation long enough to find
Alhaitham in the kitchen.

Alhaitham stands at the counter in a loose black shirt and pants, a glass of water in his hand, his
headphones conspicuously absent. His hair looks damp, and there are a few water droplets dotting
his collarbone. He must have showered while Kaveh was agonizing over the list.

His eyes track Kaveh as he enters the room. Once again, there’s a strange intensity to his gaze, as if
Kaveh is covered in runes that he needs to decode.

Kaveh is fairly certain that before this past week, Alhaitham never looked at him like that. He’d
have noticed if he did. It makes him feel helplessly exposed, and sends sweet shivers across his
skin.

Kaveh clears his throat and holds up the paper. “I, um…I have my list.”

Alhaitham nods. He takes a sip of water, then sets down the glass and moves to wash his hands in
the sink.

It suddenly occurs to Kaveh that Alhaitham just showered. Does that mean that he’ll want to look
at the lists and start tonight? Archons, no. Kaveh isn’t mentally prepared for that.

He waves the paper awkwardly. “So, I guess I’ll just…give this to you? Or, ah, set it on the
counter…”

Alhaitham dries off his hands and circles the counter to stand in front of Kaveh. Instead of taking
the proffered paper, though, he simply stares into Kaveh’s eyes, saying nothing.

Just as Kaveh is about to snap at Alhaitham for his mysterious silence, Alhaitham reaches out and
grips Kaveh’s chin.

Kaveh frowns. What is he…?

Then Alhaitham presses his index finger against Kaveh’s lower lip, and heat pools below his
stomach.

Oh. Oh. Is Alhaitham—is he really—?

Kaveh tentatively opens his mouth, wondering if he’s read the situation correctly.

Carefully, Alhaitham slips his finger past Kaveh’s lips and rests it against his tongue. Kaveh
hesitantly licks, and when Alhaitham doesn’t withdraw, he closes his lips and sucks more intently.

Alhaitham slowly thrusts his finger in and out, rubbing against Kaveh’s lips and slicking his
knuckles with drool. Heat curls in Kaveh’s stomach, and he stares at Alhaitham with half-lidded
eyes, breathing through his nose.

Then Alhaitham slides a second finger alongside the first, stretching Kaveh’s lips wider, and Kaveh
practically goes limp. He whimpers from the weight of Alhaitham’s sharp gaze, from the mouth-
full feeling.

Alhaitham delicately strokes Kaveh’s cheek with his other hand. Tucks a strand of hair behind his
ear, trails his fingertips along Kaveh’s jaw. Curls his other fingers against Kaveh’s tongue and
makes Kaveh moan against his skin, so loudly that shame curls in his chest.

Alhaitham looks so good when he’s in control. He’s dressed down while Kaveh is still wearing his
daywear, but it doesn’t matter; Kaveh might as well be stripped naked in front of him. He’s biting
back whimpers and whines while Alhaitham just stands there, casually fucking Kaveh’s mouth
with his fingers, his intense gaze never wavering.
Kaveh’s cock presses against his pants, fully hard again, practically aching to be touched.

He wonders how the fingers in his mouth would feel around his cock, stroking and squeezing. Or
how they’d feel if they brushed against his entrance and slipped inside, pressing in all the right
places, stretching him open.

Kaveh moves his head to take Alhaitham’s fingers farther into his mouth, until they reach the back
of his throat. Alhaitham watches with a fascinated look in his eyes, and Kaveh returns his stare with
an unfocused gaze. See how good I am, he thinks. Choose me, Alhaitham, choose me, please,
please, I’ll be good.

Alhaitham’s other hand keeps petting Kaveh’s cheek as he works his fingers in and out of his
mouth. Kaveh moans again, gasping at the sound of his voice being muffled by Alhaitham’s
fingers. It’s good, so good, and he’s hard, gods, he’s so hard.

Alhaitham keeps staring at him, lips parted slightly, breaths coming faster, and Kaveh tries to
imagine what Alhaitham sees. He remembers how Alhaitham had looked with his pretty lips
rounded around Kaveh’s fingers, and that docile expression on his face—hopes that he looks just as
good, lips stretched wide as he licks and sucks—imagines how it would feel if he had Alhaitham’s
cock in his mouth instead, thick and heavy on this tongue, pressing the back of his throat, and—

And Alhaitham is still looking at him, and—

Kaveh’s breath stutters, and his hips jerk forward as he comes.

It’s like sparks are igniting in his veins, flashing and then fizzling out in an instant. Kaveh bows
his head as a shudder races through his body, and a low moan slips from his lips.

Gradually, the feeling fades, and Kaveh takes a shaky breath.

“Hm.” Alhaitham withdraws his hand, then wipes his fingers on Kaveh’s shoulder.

Kaveh gasps for breath and stares at Alhaitham in disbelief. Shame courses through him as he
registers the wet, sticky feeling in his underwear.

He came. He literally just came from sucking on Alhaitham’s fingers.

“Kaveh,” Alhaitham says. He holds out his hand, presumably for the list, but Kaveh doesn’t move.
“Kaveh…?”

Kaveh’s face burns hot, and he watches Alhaitham with wide eyes, mortified. He can’t bring
himself to speak.

A smirk tugs at Alhaitham’s lips. “Heh. Are you…” His eyes trail down to Kaveh’s pants, and he
squints. “Wait, did you…?”

Kaveh shuts his eyes and winces, feeling the blush spread to his ears. He can’t believe it. This can’t
be happening. Did he seriously just come untouched from having Alhaitham’s fingers in his
mouth?

Not even his dick! Just his fucking fingers!

He wants to die. Alhaitham is never going to sleep with him after this. He’ll never let him live this
down.
Then Alhaitham laughs—but it’s a deep honeyed sound, like tea brewed with rose petals. Liquid
and sweet, and oh, Kaveh’s knees nearly buckle from hearing it.

Alhaitham has no right to sound that good. He has no right to make Kaveh feel this way.

Kaveh opens his eyes to find that Alhaitham is still staring at him. His lips are curled in a curious
smile, and his eyes glimmer with interest, as if he’s just spied a particularly rare book on
someone’s shelf.

Kaveh takes a trembling breath and tries not to sob. “I—sorry, I—”

“You did, then?”

“What does it look like?” Kaveh hisses, covering his face with his hands. He thinks the wet spot on
his pants speaks for itself.

“Good. That means you’re interested.” Alhaitham takes the list dangling from Kaveh’s hand, then
brushes past him and leaves the kitchen.

Kaveh stands completely still in the warm lamplight of the room, head spinning, heart racing in his
chest.

That means you’re interested.

What…

What is that supposed to mean?!

That was Alhaitham’s main takeaway? Not that Kaveh won’t even last five seconds in bed with
him, or that Kaveh is pathetic, or even that Kaveh clearly isn’t getting laid enough—no,
Alhaitham’s reaction is just, Oh, at least I know that Kaveh really wants my dick.

Really? Really?

“Augh!” Kaveh fists his hands in his hair and glares at the abandoned glass of water on the counter
—because of course Alhaitham left behind a dirty dish. Of course he did. Why, why, why must
Kaveh live with the most attractive yet infuriating man in all of Sumeru?

In theory, that’s probably the best reaction Kaveh could hope for. It means that Alhaitham isn’t
thinking about how badly this reflects on Kaveh. He isn’t disgusted or disappointed. Maybe he
even found it slightly attractive.

But naturally Alhaitham is thinking of how Kaveh’s orgasm reflects on him. Self-centered bastard.

Self-centered bastard…with sinfully deft fingers, an enticing smirk, and a laugh that makes Kaveh
want to drop to his knees and do whatever he says.

Gods. Arranging to sleep with Alhaitham may be Kaveh’s stupidest move to date. (And he’s still
practically bankrupt from the Palace of Alcazarzaray project, so it’s not as if there’s a shortage of
stupid mistakes to choose from.)

For once, Kaveh starts getting ready for bed early—because there’s no way he’ll be able to focus
on work with Alhaitham’s stupid sensuous laugh echoing in his mind.
The next day, Kaveh purposely stays in his room until he’s sure that Alhaitham has left for work.
As a result, the two don’t run into each other until Alhaitham comes home for dinner that evening.

Kaveh has just finished dicing an onion when Alhaitham peers into the kitchen and says, “Oh.
There you are.”

Nodding, Kaveh scoops the onion off the cutting board and into a bowl. “Welcome home.”

Alhaitham leans against the doorframe. He’s already taken off his ostentatious cape, leaving only a
black buttoned shirt and pants. The top two buttons are undone, exposing a triangle of light tan
skin beneath. “You started dinner without me,” he notes.

“I needed something to do,” Kaveh says, pointedly keeping his eyes on the knife he’s rinsing off.
He’s seen Alhaitham wear that top before—it’s one of his only shirts that isn’t somewhat
transparent—but why does it feel so different now? And why is the glimpse of skin from those
undone buttons somehow worse than when Kaveh can see Alhaitham’s entire tits through his shirt?

“Your piles of work and overwhelming debt aren’t enough?”

“Tch.” Of course Alhaitham would find an opportunity to point out Kaveh’s financial failings. “I
wasn’t going to eat without you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“The food would taste the same whether or not I ate it alone.”

“Well, then. Eat it alone.”

“I’d prefer not to.”

Kaveh meets Alhaitham’s eyes. There’s no humor in them; it seems that he doesn’t have a quip
queued up. “Then you can start cooking the onions while I prepare the rest of the ingredients.”
Swallowing thickly, he grabs a tomato from the pile of ingredients and sets about slicing it.

Surprisingly, Alhaitham joins Kaveh at the counter without protest. He grabs the bowl with the
chopped onions, then pauses. “You haven’t cooked the rice yet.”

“What?” Kaveh glances at the washed rice sitting on the counter. “Oh. I forgot.”

Alhaitham places the bowl back on the counter and goes to the stove instead, setting a pot of water
to boil. Just as Kaveh turns back to the tomato he’s chopping, Alhaitham’s hand lands on his
shoulder, light but firm.

“There’s no need to be embarrassed about yesterday,” Alhaitham says.

Kaveh’s face instantly heats, no doubt the same color as the tomato in front of him. “Can you not
—”

“I assume that’s the reason you avoided me this morning, and why you’ve barely spoken a word to
me this evening.”

“I—I’m busy.” Alhaitham’s hand is still on his shoulder, and he’s standing far too close. Kaveh
sets down the knife and grips the counter, inhaling deeply. “It’s not…I…”

Alhaitham is right, though. Despite his positive reaction to Kaveh’s blunder last night, Kaveh can
barely look him in the eyes. He feels like it’s impossible for Alhaitham to take him seriously now.
Not that he ever took Kaveh seriously to begin with—but how can Kaveh feign scholarly
indifference towards this sexual experiment of theirs, when his body has made it abundantly clear
how much he wants Alhaitham? His desperation is pathetically obvious.

“Would you prefer for me to think that you’re indifferent?” Alhaitham asks, because he’s always
had an uncanny ability to identify Kaveh’s anxieties. “A good scholar doesn’t conduct an
experiment in which they have no interest. I’d think less of you if you were apathetic.”

That’s rich coming from Alhaitham, a man who is completely uninterested in his job—although, to
his credit, he does become quite absorbed in his independent research projects.

But why must he phrase things so frustratingly, in a way so utterly devoid of passion? He can’t
simply say, Relax, Kaveh. I find you attractive. You looked so pretty when you came from sucking
my fingers. Instead he has to say it like a fucking performance review. The higher-ups are
impressed by your investment in the project, Senior Kaveh.

“I’m glad you appreciate my enthusiasm,” Kaveh mutters.

Alhaitham’s hand disappears from his shoulder. “You still feel upset.”

“Yes, I’m upset!” Kaveh says, whirling around to face him, and—oh. Alhaitham is looming
surprisingly close, enough for Kaveh to see the fiery rings around his pupils. “I fucking came in my
pants just from sucking on your fingers, and meanwhile, you’re completely unfazed by everything!
If anything, it seems to me that you lack interest!”

“That’s what you think? That I lack interest?” Alhaitham idly dips his finger into a jar of yogurt
that Kaveh forgot to put away, and contemplates the spot of white on his fingertip. “I still haven’t
finished reviewing our lists. Do you know why?”

“Because you stopped to laugh at every single thing I marked as a yes?” Kaveh says. “Also, your
hands had better be clean. We’re eating that yogurt with dinner.”

“I haven’t even looked at your list yet.” Staring at nothing in particular, Alhaitham licks the yogurt
off his finger and sucks at the tip, humming. Kaveh feels a distinct tightening between his legs at
the sight.

“I—I see,” Kaveh says, his heartbeat quickening. “So you lack interest and promptness, is that
it?”

“I didn’t think I’d get any sleep if I looked at it. The image of you sucking on my fingers was
already enough to keep me up for a few hours.” Alhaitham slowly drags his lips along his finger,
which seems extremely unnecessary when he’s already licked the yogurt off. Then he leans close
to Kaveh’s ear and murmurs, “I’m surprised you didn’t hear me. Our walls aren’t that thick.”

There’s an implication, there: that Alhaitham has most certainly heard Kaveh touching himself and
gasping Alhaitham’s name this past week. “H-hear what?” Kaveh asks, just to be difficult. “The
sound of your boisterous laughter? I must have slept through it.”

“Hm. You’re trying to goad me into saying it explicitly, aren’t you.”

Kaveh catches Alhaitham’s eye and forces himself not to look away. “And if I am? It’s not like you
to be so indirect, Alhaitham.”

“Fine.” Alhaitham presses a hand to Kaveh’s chest, palm cool against his exposed skin, and says,
“I fucked my hand last night and imagined that it was your mouth. I haven’t been able to stop
thinking about the sounds you made when you came, or the face you made when you realized what
had happened. I even thought about it at work today, and couldn’t leave my desk for twenty
minutes because I was so hard.”

“Fuck,” Kaveh breathes.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Did Alhaitham’s book teach him to talk like that? What was Kaveh thinking,
asking Alhaitham to give him a straightforward answer?

Alhaitham’s hand trails down to Kaveh’s waist. “Do you want me to get you off?”

“Wh—now?” Kaveh’s eyes widen. “I—I mean…”

Alhaitham waits. Kaveh is sorely tempted to say yes, to go pliant in his hands and let Alhaitham do
whatever he wants. Yes, yes, yes, he nearly says, except—

Except no, because he can’t just let Alhaitham have control so easily! Alhaitham already seems like
the sort of person who probably wouldn’t let anyone dominate him, and if Kaveh gives in now,
then he’ll be permanently locking himself into a submissive role. He needs to maintain some
semblance of composure, unless he wants to abandon several dozen of his sexual fantasies about
Alhaitham.

“Right now,” Kaveh says, gripping Alhaitham’s wrist, “I want you to behave yourself and help me
make dinner.”

There’s a moment of silence, and then Alhaitham lets go of his waist. “Alright,” he says, stepping
away. A moment later, he’s standing at the counter next to Kaveh, peeling potatoes as if nothing
happened.

Shit. Why is he so attractive and composed? It’s not fair.

Kaveh clears his throat. “Do—do you want me to get you off?”

Alhaitham’s eyes flick toward him. “While I peel and chop potatoes? I don’t believe that’s what
knife play refers to, Kaveh.”

“You—I—oh, shut up!”

Alhaitham smirks, and his deft fingers continue their work.

After dinner, instead of reading a book on the couch like he normally does, Alhaitham retreats to
his room—although whether it’s to jerk off or finally review the lists, Kaveh can’t be sure.
Alhaitham had certainly seemed distracted during dinner, staring off into space and responding
belatedly to Kaveh’s comments.

Later, as Kaveh emerges from the bathroom with minty breath and wearing a soft pair of pajamas,
he nearly collides with Alhaitham in the hallway. “Oh, sorry,” he says. “I—”

His eyes land on the paper in Alhaitham’s hand, and his stomach swoops. “Is…that, uh…”

“I have the final list,” Alhaitham says. He looks a bit nonplussed—eyes startled, limbs frozen—
despite the fact that he must have been searching for Kaveh.

Kaveh suddenly feels as if he bid on a construction project and is about to find out whether he’s
been chosen for the job. His stomach flutters with nerves, and he can’t breathe deeply, can’t quite
meet Alhaitham’s eyes.

Alhaitham stiffly holds out the paper, and Kaveh takes it from his hand.

Is he supposed to read it now? Or does Alhaitham expect him to leave and review it in the privacy
of his room? Maybe the latter would be better. Despite Alhaitham’s earlier reassurances, Kaveh
still half-expects the paper in his hand to say NOTHING—AS IF I’D EVER HAVE SEX WITH
YOU!

Seconds crawl past, and neither one of them moves.

Finally, when the silence has begun to grate on his ears, Kaveh takes a deep breath and looks at the
list.

Oh.

It’s real. It’s a real list.

And it’s long.

“Comparing the lists didn’t take much time,” Alhaitham says, “seeing as—”

“Holy shit,” Kaveh mutters.

It’s all there. Everything he marked down. Everything.

Praise kink, begging, dominance and submissiveness, so many others. And spanking—archons,
Alhaitham agreed to spanking…wait.

Kaveh squints at a note scrawled in the margins next to that one.

Kaveh seems quite enthusiastic about this kink.

“You ass!” Kaveh snaps. “I told you, my ink spilled!”

“I see.” Alhaitham raises an eyebrow. “So did I misunderstand? Are you not—”

“Shut up,” Kaveh sings, “shut up, shut up, shut up.”

“Fortunately for you, gags are on the list as well, so—”

“Glad to see you’re so calm about this.” Kaveh almost feels like screaming. It’s overwhelming,
seeing all of the options laid out like this and knowing that every one is an actual possibility now.
“Aren’t you even slightly daunted? This is a to-do list, Alhaitham! Every single thing on here...”

“Relax,” Alhaitham says, which has historically had the opposite effect on Kaveh. Now is no
exception: he grinds his teeth and clenches the list in his hands. “This is a list of things that we
both indicated we were willing to try. That doesn’t mean we’re obligated to do everything on it.”

“We…” Kaveh wets his lips. “We really didn’t eliminate many options, did we?”

“No. It seems we’re both rather curious.” When Kaveh doesn’t reply right away, Alhaitham asks,
“Are you still comfortable with this arrangement?”

“What?” Wide-eyed, Kaveh looks up at Alhaitham. “I—yes, obviously yes. I’m just…
overwhelmed.” He taps the list with a finger. “You—you said we don’t have to do everything on
here, but…do you want to? Do everything?”

“I’m open to that. Unless it’s too much for you.”

“Too much,” Kaveh scoffs. “As if.”

Oh, gods, it’s definitely too much.

“If you say so,” Alhaitham says.

“I—I do say so.” Kaveh clears his throat and turns the list to face Alhaitham. “And when you say
everything…do you mean both ways? As in, you want to try doing these things to me, and also
having them done to you?”

Alhaitham frowns at the paper being thrust in his face. “Of course. Our investigation would be
incomplete otherwise.”

“So, you—you want me to dominate you, and…and restrain you, and…spank you?”

Kaveh knows that the answer is probably yes, but he doesn’t dare hope. He can’t actually believe
that Alhaitham would agree to any of that.

Folding his arms, Alhaitham says, “I think the answer to that question is encapsulated by my
previous response. The only exception would be if you were uncomfortable with something going
both ways.”

Kaveh grunts. He’d rather hear that Alhaitham wants it, in plain and simple terms. None of this
roundabout I want a complete investigation nonsense.

“Oh, I see.” Alhaitham’s lips curl upward, and he steps forward, pushing the list aside so that he
can look at Kaveh properly. “You like to make me say things explicitly. In which case…” Another
step forward, and Alhaitham smooths his hands up Kaveh’s chest, his fingers tracing the deep
collar of his silk shirt. “Yes, Kaveh. I want you to dominate me, and restrain me, and spank me.”

Kaveh gasps and nearly drops the list. Heat shoots through his veins like espresso, making every
inch of him feel alive and wired. Arousal stirs below his hips, and he suddenly craves more of
Alhaitham’s skin against his.

Alhaitham chuckles. “You really are easy to rile up.”

“You…!” Kaveh huffs and points a finger at Alhaitham—but Alhaitham captures his wrist and
regards his hand pensively, almost like he’s considering sucking on his fingers again. Dear gods.
“You say it as a joke now, but I’ll make you say it like you mean it. I’ll make you beg.”

“Also on the list,” Alhaitham says smoothly. His lips are tilted in a definite smile now, though it’s
hard to tell whether it’s a teasing or genuine one.

“Once I have my way with you,” Kaveh growls, “you won’t be so nonchalant.”

“I suppose we’ll see.”

“Yes, we will!”
Alhaitham’s lips twitch, and he exhales a laugh through his nose. “Then we’re on the same page.
Good.”

“N-no, we’re not!” Kaveh says. “Because you don’t really think I can do it.”

Alhaitham raises his eyebrows—and that does it.

Kaveh drops the list and grabs him by the arms, then spins and pushes Alhaitham against the wall.
“I’m going to wreck you, do you hear me?” He presses his hands to Alhaitham’s hips and leans
close to his ear, lowering his voice to a murmur. “I haven’t forgotten how desperate you looked
with my fingers in your mouth. I’m sure you’re equally desperate to suck on my cock—and judging
by our list, you don’t want to stop at having it in your mouth.”

He drags a hand along Alhaitham’s waist, ghosting under the hem of his shirt and skimming his
bare hip. Alhaitham’s breath hitches.

“Isn’t that right, Haitham?” Kaveh says. “You want me to fuck you, too. And no, that’s not a
question, because the answer is obvious. You can’t hide how much you want it.”

Alhaitham exhales shakily. He doesn’t try to escape from Kaveh’s grasp—just stands there, breaths
coming faster, head tilted back slightly.

Kaveh grips his hips and pulls him close, grinding against him once. “But you’re right,” he says. “I
do like to make you say things explicitly. So why don’t you tell me, Alhaitham? Tell me how
much you want it.”

Alhaitham says nothing, but his hands latch onto Kaveh’s arms, holding him in place.

“Or,” Kaveh adds, brushing his lips against Alhaitham’s jaw, “I’ll settle for you showing me
instead. My requirements are flexible.”

He’s intending to touch Alhaitham, one way or another—but then Alhaitham grabs Kaveh’s face
and pulls him into a kiss.

Kaveh’s nails dig into Alhaitham’s waist as he kisses him back, crowding him against the wall.
One of Alhaitham’s hands tangles in his hair, tugging lightly and making Kaveh groan. Kaveh
deepens the kiss in response, rolling his hips against Alhaitham’s.

Alhaitham gasps and jerks against him. Despite the intensity, though, his lips move sweetly,
carefully, and Kaveh wonders whether it’s precision or inexperience.

Gods, how much experience does Alhaitham actually have?

Rather than making Kaveh ease off, the question only makes him redouble his efforts. Regardless
of the answer, Kaveh is determined to be better than anyone else Alhaitham has had.

He keeps grinding against Alhaitham, and Alhaitham copies the movements, rubbing their clothed
cocks together. He must feel how hard Kaveh is, because Kaveh’s sleep pants are thin, and arousal
pulses below his stomach with every move Alhaitham makes. There’s no question that he’s
interested.

Kaveh’s hands fumble at Alhaitham’s beltline, searching for the button to undo his pants.
Humming, Alhaitham reaches down and tugs Kaveh’s cock free from his pants—and when he
wraps his calloused hand around it, Kaveh breaks the kiss to moan into his shoulder instead. He
shivers and lets his eyes fall shut, nearly forgetting his intention to get Alhaitham’s pants off.
Alhaitham’s amused huff brings Kaveh back to himself, and he hastily reaches for Alhaitham’s
pants and undoes them. Smirking, he pulls Alhaitham’s pants down unnecessarily far, enough to
bare his entire ass.

“Wh—” Alhaitham’s question is muffled by Kaveh’s lips on his, and he groans as Kaveh’s nails
drag across his ass and squeeze.

Kaveh pulls him closer and pins their hips together, then reaches one hand between them and
messily strokes Alhaitham’s cock. His other hand continues to cup Alhaitham’s ass, nails digging
into the soft skin.

Alhaitham’s breaths are quick and ragged, even as his hand steadily strokes Kaveh’s cock. He
braces his free hand against Kaveh’s shoulder, and Kaveh presses haphazard kisses to his lips,
revelling in the way Alhaitham chases his mouth for each kiss. When Kaveh eventually pulls back
for air, Alhaitham drags kisses along his jaw instead, sending a thrill down Kaveh’s spine.

Kaveh buries his face against Alhaitham’s neck and sucks a mark onto his skin, too high for any
collar to hide. Alhaitham jolts, a quiet moan slipping from his mouth, and Kaveh nips playfully at
his throat before leaving another conspicuous mark.

Alhaitham feels so warm, so close, his hair tickling Kaveh’s face, his nails biting into his shoulder.
And he’s clinging so tightly to him, too—like he refuses to let Kaveh leave, like he needs to keep
Kaveh’s hands on him, like he actually wants Kaveh.

Like he actually wants him.

Kaveh gasps, suddenly hyperaware of each touch of Alhaitham’s hand—how his thumb circles the
tip of his cock, how he trails his fingertips below the head, how he tightens his grip as he slides his
hand upward. Alhaitham is touching him, really touching him, and will keep doing that until Kaveh
comes.

The thought of Alhaitham actually trying to make Kaveh feel good is so surreal, so unbelievable,
that Kaveh feels like he must be dreaming. His mind spins with the realization that Alhaitham must
be paying attention to his reactions, carefully calculating his movements, adjusting each touch to
bring Kaveh closer to the edge.

It's possibly the most effort Alhaitham has ever put into their nebulous relationship with each other,
and Kaveh’s stomach flutters stupidly at the thought.

But this definitely isn’t a dream. If it were a dream, Kaveh would have buried himself inside
Alhaitham by now, fucked him against the wall and refused to let him come unless he begged.

He’s definitely making him beg, next time.

Kaveh trails a finger along the cleft of Alhaitham’s ass. “One of these days,” he whispers, “I’ll
make good use of this pretty ass of yours.”

Alhaitham makes a choked sound and curls against Kaveh, his hand momentarily fumbling.

Kaveh laughs and presses a gentle kiss below Alhaitham’s jaw. “And you say I’m easy to rile up? I
think that’s you.”

“N-not—” Alhaitham’s breath rasps with a sigh, and Kaveh wonders how he must feel right now,
hearing his own voice so abnormally wrecked. “Not mutually e-exclusive.”
“At least I can still form complete sentences.”

It’s entrancing, the way Alhaitham is lost for words. Stubborn Alhaitham, always so composed, so
confident that he can win any argument—now reduced to a breathless mess, barely able to spit out
three words.

Kaveh nearly comes just from that thought. But he holds himself together, determined to watch
Alhaitham come undone first. He strokes Alhaitham’s cock and focuses on the sound of his uneven
breaths, on the open-mouthed kisses Alhaitham presses to his throat.

Struck by inspiration, Kaveh lets go of Alhaitham’s ass and grips his chin. “Look at me,” he says.

Alhaitham’s eyes meet his. His lips are parted as he gasps for breath, matched by the sharp rise and
fall of his shoulders, and his brow is pinched in confusion, as if he doesn’t understand how he
could end up so powerless, doesn’t understand how Kaveh could make him feel like this.

Still gripping his cock, Kaveh releases Alhaitham’s chin and taps his lips. He doesn’t issue the
actual command—just lifts his eyebrows pointedly and waits.

Eyes widening, Alhaitham parts his lips and takes Kaveh’s finger into his mouth.

It’s ten times more erotic than that day in the living room, because now Alhaitham is panting, skin
flushed, his cock slick with precum in Kaveh’s hand. His nails carve into Kaveh’s shoulder hard
enough to sting, and the hand stroking Kaveh’s cock loses its precision.

“Go on,” Kaveh murmurs. Alhaitham intently sucks and licks, then drags his lips upward so that
the finger smears spit on his chin. “J-just like that. I know what you want.”

Gods, oh, gods. Alhaitham is so eager as he practically drools on Kaveh’s hand, his eyes never
straying from Kaveh’s.

Kaveh doesn’t know if he can last much longer when Alhaitham looks like this, feels like this. His
mouth warm, wet, pliant—it’s too easy to imagine how it would feel to have those lips around
Kaveh’s cock instead.

Breathing shakily, Kaveh presses another finger alongside the first, and Alhaitham instantly takes
both into his mouth, moaning around them. His hand somehow manages to grip Kaveh’s cock
again, and he resumes his previous efforts with unsteady movements.

Kaveh keeps stroking Alhaitham as he thrusts his fingers in and out of his mouth, gradually
pushing them deeper. Quiet moans stutter in Alhaitham’s throat as his tongue sweeps along
Kaveh’s skin, spit gleaming on the corner of his lips.

Then Kaveh presses his fingers a bit too far, and Alhaitham gags, his body seizing up. A low moan
tears from his lips, and as Kaveh yanks his fingers back, he feels Alhaitham’s cock twitch in his
grasp, spilling onto his hand.

Alhaitham trembles against Kaveh, squeezing his eyes shut as he comes. Kaveh grabs his chin and
kisses him through the rest of his climax, feeling each moan vibrate against his lips. It’s good, so
good, too good—

And then Kaveh hurtles after Alhaitham, body tensing as his cock adds to the mess on their hands.
He gasps into Alhaitham’s mouth, and then his legs buckle, collapsing him against Alhaitham’s
chest.
They both go limp, and for a moment, the only sound is their lungs heaving for air. Kaveh presses
his forehead to Alhaitham’s shoulder and breathes in the faint scent of sweat and sex, trying to
collect himself.

Gradually, his ability to think returns, and he drifts back to reality.

His clothes are askew. Both of his hands are wet. Alhaitham is shifting beneath him, trying to
nudge Kaveh’s full weight off his chest.

And the two of them just got each other off in the hallway.

Kaveh slowly pushes himself upright, staggering slightly as he regains his balance. He notes that
Alhaitham seems equally disheveled: he’s slumped against the wall with his pants around his
thighs, at least three hickeys on his throat, and a splayed hand covered in cum.

Kaveh glances down at his own messy hand. Raising an eyebrow, he lifts his fingers to his mouth
and sucks, relishing how Alhaitham watches with wide eyes as he licks his hand clean.

Thick, alkaline, it certainly doesn’t taste as good as an evening cup of tea—but it’s better for the
way it makes Alhaitham’s face and shoulders flush deep red, his lips parting in surprise. He
legitimately looks like he might try to go for a second round.

When Kaveh finally lowers his fingers from his mouth, an uncertain silence settles over the
hallway, and Alhaitham grips the bathroom doorframe with his clean hand. “I’m going to take a
shower,” he says, his voice surprisingly level.

He—he’s done, just like that? Gods above. The only way Alhaitham could make this any more
impersonal would be to give Kaveh a handshake and thank him for doing business.

“Wait!” Kaveh blurts out, and Alhaitham stares at him. “Let me, um…clean you up first, and get
you some water.”

“I can clean up and get water in the bathroom.”

“R-right, but…”

Is this really the same person who just came from gagging on Kaveh’s fingers two minutes ago?
Was there some strange bacteria in the yogurt they ate earlier that somehow made Kaveh
hallucinate that whole encounter?

Well, Alhaitham might want to beat a hasty retreat, but Kaveh isn’t satisfied with just walking
away—he feels the need to do some sort of bonding or aftercare, however slight. Even if there will
be plenty of chances once they officially start working through the list, this feels too…abrupt.
Meaningless. As if Kaveh failed to give Alhaitham a good enough reason to stick around, and
doesn’t deserve a minute more of his time.

“Um.” Kaveh swallows nervously. Since Alhaitham rejected his offer to clean him up or get him
water, he isn’t sure what else to suggest. “I’ll…brew some tea, then…?”

Alhaitham regards him for longer than necessary, then nods.

As he turns to leave, Kaveh adds, “Don’t forget to take off your headphones!”

Alhaitham gives him a quizzical look. “What?”

“You…I wasn’t sure how distracted you’d be, after…” Kaveh waves his hand. “So, ah—you
know, just in case you forgot that you were wearing them, don’t…get your headphones wet.”

“I see.” Lingering in the doorway, Alhaitham contemplates the mess on his hand. Then he holds up
a finger and sucks it clean, staring off into space. “Hm.”

Without another word, he slips into the bathroom and shuts the door behind him.

Kaveh wheezes.

He can’t believe that man. How can he act so unaffected, when Kaveh feels like dropping to the
ground and screaming?

He just touched Alhaitham’s dick. He just made Alhaitham orgasm.

He just had sex with a man that he’s known for close to a decade—except there was a conspicuous
falling-out in the middle of that decade: one that detonated their years-long friendship and landed
them in this inexplicable arrangement, where they’re still something, but neither one of them knows
what.

The two of them can’t even figure out how to be friends again, and now they’re having sex.
Because of course they are. Kaveh and Alhaitham have been a complete disaster ever since that
joint project; it only makes sense that they’d continue to complicate things now.

And yet, there had been nothing complicated about how Alhaitham fell apart in Kaveh’s hands,
gasping and moaning as he came.

Well. At least one part of his relationship with Alhaitham is finally simple.

Kaveh sighs and tugs his pants back up. Years ago, back when he and Alhaitham were still friends,
Kaveh might have been upset that this first encounter wasn’t more romantic. He might have
fantasized about slow lovemaking on soft sheets, their bodies tangled together in the amber glow of
late evening. Whispered affections, playful teasing. Lingering kisses and delicate touches.

Even if they were just friends instead of lovers, Kaveh still would have wanted to take his time
with someone he cared about. He’d have balked at the idea of a quick fuck in the hallway, with no
sweet words, no taking their time, not even a bed.

But this is what they are, now: a disjointed patchwork of past and present, like a beautiful old
house with ghastly renovations. There’s still the foundation of familiarity, but the house itself has
been painted over with ugly things: quick tempers, biting sarcasm, foolish impulses. Some days,
Kaveh doesn’t even remember what he and Alhaitham used to look like. Even as the paint peels, he
just sees a second hideous layer underneath.

So, a sexual encounter where they moved almost wordlessly in tandem, but couldn’t be bothered to
make it intimate or loving—in a pitiful way, it suits them.

With shaky steps, Kaveh retrieves the list from where it fluttered to the ground. As he scans the
words a second time, reality settles in: this was the first time he had sex with Alhaitham, but it’s
nowhere near the last.

He doesn’t know what that means—whether the two of them will further disarray themselves with
each attempt, or whether they’ll eventually find some sort of footing with each other. Although
Kaveh has no illusions that he and Alhaitham will ever salvage their failed friendship, he wonders
if maybe he and Alhaitham can still succeed at something together.
 Even if that something is sex.

Because just now, Alhaitham had been far more cooperative than Kaveh had anticipated. He was
an active participant. He was visibly affected by what Kaveh did to him. He was interested.

It’s a promising start, even if it follows on the heels of a years-old ending.

Kaveh reads over the list again.

It…really is a long list.

A long list of things he’s going to do with Alhaitham.

Sexual things. Because they’re having sex now, apparently.

Face heating, Kaveh leans his forehead against the wall and wonders what he’s gotten himself into.

Chapter End Notes

“what have i gotten myself into”: kaveh agreeing to test kinks with alhaitham me
posting the first chapter of this fic

I’m still setting up my Twitter account and trying to remember how social media
works, but you can find me on Twitter here. Thank you for reading!
 Chapter 2
Chapter Summary

“Hm.” Alhaitham runs his fingers along Kaveh’s bare thighs, and Kaveh
jolts, nearly splashing the coffee out of his cup. “Would you be more
persuaded if I said that I want to feel your mouth on my cock?”

Kaveh sharply inhales, and his knuckles pale as he tightens his grip on the
cup. “You—ah—th-that…”

Alhaitham leans closer. “What if I said that I also want to get on my knees
and suck you off?” He slips his fingers beneath Kaveh’s shorts, and
Kaveh visibly shivers. “Well? Will you let me taste you, Kaveh?”

“Oh, gods,” Kaveh breathes. “What the fuck.”

Alhaitham really is inclined to believe Kaveh’s complaints about not

getting laid, if this is all it takes.

Chapter Notes

in this chapter: mild footjobs(?), grinding (of coffee beans), light bondage, nipple play,
blowjobs, mild edging, mild begging, verbal humiliation/degradation*, submissive
alhaitham, dominant kaveh, use of safeword*

*If you need more information before reading, check the endnotes for details about the
verbal humiliation and safeword.

(Also, no discussion of leaked content in the comments section, please! I actually still
haven't seen the Kaveh leaks, and I know that some of my followers/readers are
avoiding them, too.)

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Standing at the kitchen counter, Alhaitham watches steam curl over his cup of coffee. Bubbles
cluster on the foamy surface and obscure the liquid below, much like the questions that keep
crowding his mind.

Kaveh has given him too much to think about.

Even though their friendship dissolved years ago, Alhaitham has continued to appreciate that
Kaveh acts as a mirror for his philosophies. As such, he has never been dissatisfied having Kaveh
as a roommate, however much they bicker. As long as Kaveh’s presence somehow continues to
expand Alhaitham’s understanding of the world, he considers their current arrangement to be
worthwhile.
Except now that understanding has suddenly expanded in several different directions at once, and
Alhaitham finds himself struggling to track each development. It’s like trying to decode a tablet
with a dozen sets of runes layered on top of each other, all in different languages. He could easily
read any one passage on its own—but with all twelve overlapping, it’s a headache just to decipher
each layer, let alone figure out what the actual symbols translate to.

Alhaitham had agreed to this current experiment with two specific inquiries in mind. The first was,
of course, to figure out how he responds to the stimuli mentioned in that book. Human sexuality is
part of human psychology, so a better understanding of his sexuality will naturally equate to a
better understanding of himself.

The second was to further observe Kaveh, particularly his approach to sex with Alhaitham.
Alhaitham is curious to see if the two of them can have a functional sexual relationship despite
their tendency to clash in nearly every conceivable manner—and if they do somehow manage that,
then he wants to know how exactly that happened. They clearly hadn’t been able to maintain their
bygone friendship, so a comparison of that failed relationship to a successful one might be
illuminating.

Alhaitham has no sentimental intentions of salvaging their former relationship, obviously; for him,
the current situation is perfectly satisfactory. But he certainly won’t forgo an opportunity to learn
more about the human experience or his own psychology, especially one this promising.

The problem is that Alhaitham can’t think.

No, that’s not quite true—he’s perfectly capable of it. But the moment Kaveh touches him,
Alhaitham starts asking himself all the wrong questions. His mind searches for ways he can feel
good, ways he can make Kaveh feel good, and thinks of little else. And afterwards, he finds that he
doesn’t have much in the way of answers: just an ever-growing list of fantasies he wants to enact,
persistent memories of Kaveh’s tempting hands and lips, and an intense desire to touch Kaveh
again as soon as possible.

The experiment has gone sideways from the start, and Alhaitham doesn’t like how that bodes for
his results.

Footsteps shuffle in the hall, and a moment later, Kaveh appears in the kitchen doorway. His hair is
rumpled from sleep, but his posture is lax and his eyes are bright, so it doesn’t seem that he’s been
prematurely roused.

“You’re up early,” Alhaitham comments, and takes a sip of his coffee.

“Mm.” Kaveh yawns and stretches his arms above his head, causing the hem of his pajama shirt to
lift. It reveals a glimpse of tan stomach with a trail of soft bronze hair, which seems like a much
better place for Alhaitham’s lips than the rim of his coffee cup. “I hope you made enough coffee
for two.”

“I didn’t, since I had no reason to think you’d be joining me.” Historically, Kaveh has barely
managed to drag himself out of bed in time for breakfast—and even then, he often goes back to
sleep once he’s done eating. “But you’re welcome to make your own. The beans and cezve are
here on the counter.”

Kaveh rolls his eyes. “And I suppose I’ll have to grind the beans myself.”

“Is your wrist that tired from a single handjob?”

The comment slips out before Alhaitham can think better of it. Instantly, Kaveh’s face darkens with
a blush, and he clasps his hands close to his chest, almost like he’s trying to keep them safe from
something. “You—so casually! And first thing in the morning! Well, I suppose I know what you
dreamed about last night.”

Alhaitham takes another sip of coffee, and wonders if he can pass off his heated cheeks as a result
of the hot drink. “I don’t recall.”

It’s a lie. He vividly recalls a dream where Kaveh had knelt in front of him and taken his cock in
his mouth, wide ruby eyes staring up at Alhaitham as he sucked. And he also recalls how that
dream had ended with Alhaitham on his hands and knees, Kaveh delicately stroking his back as he
murmured filthy things in his ear.

(Alhaitham remembers the things Kaveh said in the dream, too, but he’s not about to revisit those
when Kaveh is standing a meter away from him.)

Kaveh folds his arms and leans forward with a suspicious glint in his eyes. “How strange, that
you’re blushing from the memory of a supposedly dreamless sleep. Hm…did you wake up to some
sort of evidence, then?”

“No,” Alhaitham grits out, because no, he has not been afflicted with nocturnal emissions (partly
because he’s been actively jerking off to thoughts of the man in front of him, which keeps his dick
plenty occupied). “But I notice that you’re wearing shorts instead of the pants you had on last
night. Is that what happened to you?”

“You might find this hard to believe,” Kaveh says, “but impromptu handjobs sometimes result in
clothing stains. I went back to my room and got changed after you disappeared with your cup of
tea.” He says disappeared the way he might say demolished my architectural models or painted the
walls valberry pink—as if Alhaitham had committed some unforgivable offense by retiring to his
room for the night. “And I don’t see that cup anywhere in the kitchen, which I suppose means you
left it in your room, didn’t you.”

“Does it affect you if I did?”

“Since you seem to expect me to keep this house clean, yes. Ugh. You’re despicable, do you know
that?” Kaveh hops onto the counter opposite from Alhaitham and perches on the edge, swinging
his feet above the ground. “But I don’t need coffee, anyway. I feel perfectly awake.”

Beneath wispy golden hair, his legs are smooth and unblemished—the same as his throat and
shoulders, where Alhaitham hadn’t managed to leave a single mark. It feels like an error, that they
had a sexual encounter last night and Kaveh wears no evidence. There’s no trace of the truth on his
body.

There are traces on Alhaitham’s, though, in the form of two prominent bruises that are too high to
be covered by any of the shirts he owns. He’s almost certain Kaveh did that on purpose, in an
attempt to get on his nerves.

Not that Alhaitham cares what other people think about his sexual exploits. He only cares that he
didn’t have a chance to return the favor. But he certainly intends to—and when he does, he’ll start
with Kaveh’s thighs, which are currently bared by the shorts riding up his legs.

“It’s unusual for you to be this energetic in the early morning,” Alhaitham says, dragging his eyes
back up to Kaveh’s face. A hair clip hangs tenuously from the edge of his bangs. “Do I need to
worry about you spending your rent money on illicit substances?”
Kaveh’s face scrunches. “The only illicit substance I’ve consumed recently is the ejaculate I licked
off my hand last night.” Those words conjure memories of how Kaveh’s tongue had thoroughly
captured every drop, a thought so overwhelming that Alhaitham nearly lets go of the cup in his
hand. “I suppose I feel refreshed thanks to our little tryst. I always sleep better after some stress
relief.”

The way he says stress relief makes it clear that he’s referring to a very specific kind of outlet.
Alhaitham’s grip on his cup tightens. “In that case, I’m surprised that you don’t wake up early
more often, considering how much stress you relieve.”

“Are you serious? What relief? I’m constantly pent-up living with you! Not only are you utterly
aggravating, but I haven’t gotten laid even once since I moved into this fucking place. Ten bottles
of Lambad’s best wine would barely put a dent in the stress I’m carrying around.”

Just as Alhaitham opens his mouth to chastise Kaveh for constantly racking up tabs at the tavern,
he registers Kaveh’s inadvertent admission. “That’s a surprise. Then, when you boasted about your
ability to find sexual partners, I take it that you were exaggerating your prowess?”

“Exaggerating!” Kaveh exclaims, and crosses his arms. “As if. I certainly have the ability—in fact,
I’ll have you know that I’ve turned down plenty of offers. There’s no shortage of people who are
eager to fall into bed with me.”

“Is that so?” Alhaitham drawls. “If you’re in such desperate need of stress relief, then why would
you turn down so many overtures? Are they not up to your standards?” He raises an eyebrow.
“Could it be that you only manage to attract unsavory partners?”

“No,” Kaveh snaps, “and I hope you realize you’ve just described yourself as unsavory, with that
clever quip. But no, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the offers I’ve gotten. They’re all
perfectly nice and attractive individuals, because I attract perfectly nice and attractive partners.”

“I’ll keep in mind that you think I’m perfectly nice and attractive,” Alhaitham says, smirking
when Kaveh splutters in response. “And I fail to see why you’d complain about not having enough
sex, when you’re supposedly getting good offers and turning them down. If that’s really the case, it
sounds like a self-inflicted problem. Unless you had a compelling reason for refusing so many
legitimate and promising offers?”

Of course, he doesn’t actually think Kaveh is getting that many viable offers. Not because Kaveh
is incapable of finding a partner—he’s certainly attractive, and potentially charming to anyone who
can tolerate his foolishness—but because the evidence simply indicates that he isn’t. If he were,
then he would have accepted at least a small percentage of those offers, and wouldn’t be
complaining about his completely nonexistent sex life.

Still, Alhaitham finds it amusing to see Kaveh scramble to cover up his bluff. He watches as
Kaveh’s face flushes even darker, and then Kaveh turns away with a humph, pointedly avoiding
Alhaitham’s eyes.

“It’s alright, Kaveh,” Alhaitham says, stepping closer. “Sometimes perfectly talented individuals
nonetheless struggle to find opportunities.”

“You—” Kaveh turns to scowl at him, his cheeks puffed indignantly. “That’s what I said when I
was having trouble finding clients! You ass. I’m not struggling to find opportunities. I just—” He
freezes when Alhaitham leans into his space. “Wh-what are you doing?”

Snorting, Alhaitham reaches up and plucks the red hair clip dangling from the end of Kaveh’s
bangs. “You forgot to take out one of your clips before going to sleep. It was falling off.”
Eyebrows raised, he holds up the red clasp.

Kaveh growls and snatches the clip from Alhaitham’s fingers. “Are you just looking for an excuse
to get in my space?” he asks, securing the clip in his hair. When Alhaitham doesn’t respond, a sly
smile tugs at Kaveh’s lips. Extending his leg, he trails his bare foot up Alhaitham’s thigh. “You
know, if you woke up horny, you can just say so.” He taps his toes against Alhaitham’s groin and
adds, “I won’t judge. I already know you’re sexually repressed.”

“I…” Alhaitham clings to his cup of coffee as Kaveh’s foot starts rubbing up and down his crotch,
stirring his cock to attention. “It seems you’re trying to distract me from the discovery that you—
ngh.” His hips twitch, and Kaveh smirks, drawing a circle with his toes. “That you aren’t as
efficient at finding sexual partners as you claimed to be.”

“Hm.” Kaveh sits back with his hands braced against the wooden counter, still moving his foot.
“Well, it’s none of your business why I turned down all those handsome people, so I suppose I’ll
let you come to an incorrect conclusion. Besides…” He presses down against the outline of
Alhaitham’s cock, and the pressure nearly makes Alhaitham groan a second time. “You didn’t
seem to like it when I bragged about philandering, anyway. Are you worried that I’ll go test kinks
with someone else?”

“No,” Alhaitham says tensely. It occurs to him that if he isn’t careful, his pants will suffer the same
fate as Kaveh’s did a few days ago; Kaveh is surprisingly adept at using his foot this way, and he’s
sadly not wrong that Alhaitham woke up aroused. “I’m fairly confident that I’m your only option.
And it would be unprofessional of you to abandon an experiment at the outset, especially when I
—” He grits his teeth as Kaveh presses his heel to the underside of his cock and then pushes
upward, dragging his foot toward the head. “I’ve already invested resources in this venture.”

“Resources? Making use of that financial freedom, I see.” Kaveh nudges his toes against the tip of
Alhaitham’s cock, which now juts noticeably against his loose pants. “Oh, you really are ready to
go, aren’t you? And the sun is barely up. What would you have done if I’d slept for another three
hours?”

“This naturally resulted from you stimulating my genitalia, not because I’m ready to go. If you had
stayed asleep, I wouldn’t be aroused right now.”

“For gods’ sakes,” Kaveh mutters. “Stimulating your genitalia? Is our expert linguist really that
bad at dirty talk?”

“That wasn’t an attempt at dirty talk. I was just correcting your mistaken conclusion.” Alhaitham
steps away from Kaveh before his foot can do something that results in more clothing stains. “I’m
making coffee.”

Nose wrinkled, Kaveh lowers his leg. “You haven’t even finished that first cup.”

“Weren’t you just demanding that I make you some?” Normally, Alhaitham would make Kaveh do
the work himself, but he needs a distraction, and he especially needs an excuse to get away from
Kaveh’s compelling touch. He’s not sure how carried away the two of them might get, otherwise.

That’s another interesting development: when Kaveh starts touching him, Alhaitham loses his
ability to think ahead. He’s reminded of the night before, when he tried to approach their
spontaneous tryst methodically—but the moment Kaveh shoved his fingers in Alhaitham’s mouth,
Alhaitham stopped trying to make predictions, too fixated on how good everything felt.
It's not particularly surprising, because Alhaitham knows that sexual activity can muffle the more
logical parts of a person’s mind. But Alhaitham should find it alarming, that he so easily enters a
state of mind where he doesn’t take time to contemplate. In fact, in any other situation or with
anyone else, Alhaitham might very well be unsettled.

With Kaveh, though, Alhaitham has no qualms about abandoning rational thought and letting go.
What’s more, the concept of forgoing all calculations and jumping straight to execution is
actually…exciting.

Alhaitham almost never feels excited by things.

But it’s also not surprising that Kaveh would be the person to produce that sort of response. He’s
Alhaitham’s equal and opposite, the mirror that constantly interrogates his perspectives; he was
bound to eventually catch Alhaitham off-guard.

He doesn’t mind the unpredictability, though. Being in uncharted territory, with no idea what might
happen and no inclination to form a hypothesis—how intriguing.

As Alhaitham rotates the handle of the coffee grinder, Kaveh hums appreciatively. “Look at those
muscles. Did you get those biceps just from grinding coffee beans? Careful with the coffee
drinking, Alhaitham, or you might jeopardize your reputation as a feeble scholar.”

Alhaitham shakes the grinder to dislodge a few loose beans, then resumes spinning the handle.
“Does my physique bother you, Kaveh?”

“Mm. That’s one way to put it, I suppose.”

Even without looking at Kaveh’s face, it’s clear what direction his thoughts have gone. (Although
that was already rather obvious, from how he teased Alhaitham with his foot a few minutes ago.)

“I’m starting to suspect that you didn’t get out of bed just for a cup of coffee,” Alhaitham remarks.

“Hm. I did, actually. I have no intention of disrupting your morning routine.”

When Alhaitham glances at Kaveh, he’s surprised to see no trace of a joke on his face. “Really,” he
says, dubious.

“Really. However,” Kaveh adds, kicking his feet playfully, “if I happen to get a glimpse of your
nice dick and big muscles while I’m here…well, that’s an incidental benefit, I suppose.”

Alhaitham’s face heats as he relights the stove. Nice dick and big muscles. Kaveh is ridiculous. He
says the most absurd things.

And yet, the way Kaveh said that—almost patronizing, as if he felt assured that he could do
whatever he wanted to those parts of Alhaitham’s body—has heat building slowly in Alhaitham’s
gut, like he’s a pot of water that’s been set to boil.

Sighing, Alhaitham dumps the coffee grinds and some water into the cezve, then places the brass
pot on the burner.

“You forgot the sugar,” Kaveh says.

“I don’t make it with sugar.”

“But I do.”
“Then make your own.”

“But you’re already making it for me!”

“Then don’t complain about my generosity.”

Alhaitham turns and leans back against the counter that’s opposite from Kaveh, then takes a drink
from his lukewarm cup. Kaveh pouts back at him, lips pursed, cheeks flushed. His heel knocks
against the cabinets below the counter as he swings his leg, producing an arhythmic thumping that
would drive Alhaitham insane if it were caused by anyone else.

“Fine,” Kaveh says, after a moment. “But if my semen tastes disgustingly bitter because I drank
unsweetened coffee, you brought that on yourself.”

“One cup of coffee won’t drastically alter the flavor of your seminal fluids,” Alhaitham says.

Unfortunately, he now finds himself wondering why Kaveh was thinking about Alhaitham tasting
him—and his mind instantly answers with an image of him kneeling on the kitchen floor in front of
Kaveh, Kaveh’s fingers curled tightly in his hair, his cock hard beneath the loose fabric of those
shorts.

Alhaitham sips distractedly at his coffee as he considers that idea, which is absolutely not helping
his dick settle down.

It’s almost funny that Kaveh is so convinced of Alhaitham’s disinterest. Just yesterday, in this
same room, he’d accused Alhaitham of being unfazed by everything—which then required
Alhaitham to awkwardly correct the record by admitting that he’s been thinking almost nonstop
about fucking Kaveh.

Because, well. He has been.

And the fantasizing started even before Kaveh gave him his list of approved kinks. If pressed for
the truth, Alhaitham would say that he began thinking about Kaveh the day that they agreed to
experiment together…except that wouldn’t actually be the truth, either. In all honesty, Alhaitham
has been thinking about Kaveh ever since he read the foreword of that book.

Some things you can’t replicate without other people, Kaveh had lectured him, as if Alhaitham
would fail to realize something so obvious. Of course he had considered that some activities in the
book required another person. And rather than imagine a faceless entity as his hypothetical sexual
partner, Alhaitham had naturally envisioned the person he felt most comfortable viewing in that
light.

Kaveh had been the most logical choice. Due to their former friendship, Alhaitham is intimately
familiar with him—but because they’re no longer actual friends, there’s no relationship to
jeopardize if Alhaitham fantasizes about sex with him. Furthermore, Alhaitham is comfortable
enough with Kaveh that the idea of sex with him actually seems appealing, and obviously it helps
that Alhaitham also finds Kaveh physically attractive.

Alhaitham wonders if Kaveh has failed to realize that last part, too.

He shouldn’t have to spell it out. Even if attraction is subjective, it should be evident from the way
Alhaitham stares at Kaveh’s lips too long, the way he keeps looking at Kaveh’s legs, the way his
eyes instantly latch on to brief glimpses of bare skin.

Alhaitham is attracted to Kaveh. Obviously.

That said, Kaveh has no way of knowing just how extensively Alhaitham has fantasized about him.
He doesn’t realize that Alhaitham had already devised several different ways for Kaveh to restrain
and dominate him before their conversation in the hallway—or that when Alhaitham compared
their lists and saw that the two of them wanted the same things, he’d nearly charged out the door
and demanded that Kaveh fuck him on the nearest piece of furniture.

Or perhaps Kaveh does realize that second part. You don’t want to stop at having my cock in your
mouth. Isn’t that right, Haitham? You want me to fuck you, too.

Alhaitham breaks into a coughing fit as grit slithers down his throat. Lost in thought, he’d
accidentally drained the entire cup of coffee, chugging the heap of coffee grounds that had settled
at the bottom.

“Are you alright?” Kaveh exclaims. “Can—can you breathe, or—”

“Fine,” Alhaitham croaks. “I…” Coughing again, he sets the empty cup on the counter. “Drank the
grounds.”

“You aren’t supposed to do that.”

“I’m aware.”

“Hm. So, is this an indication that you prefer to swallow, or does it mean that you’re more suited
for spit—"

“It means,” Alhaitham says, face hot, “that I accidentally drank the grounds.”

He spins to check the coffee on the stove. It’s just beginning to froth, so Alhaitham hastily removes
it from the burner and moves to pour it—only to realize that he hasn’t grabbed an empty cup for
Kaveh. Alhaitham quickly retrieves one from the cupboard, nearly sloshing hot coffee onto himself
as he does, and shakily pours the drink into it.

It’s almost incomprehensible, how badly Kaveh jumbles his thoughts. Alhaitham had thought that
his rational approach to life would help him maintain a cool head when it comes to sex, but
evidently he’s just as susceptible to hormones as the average human being. His intellect provides
no defense against his libido, and reading an entire book on the subject has done nothing to prepare
Alhaitham for the way his mind floats away when Kaveh touches him.

Alhaitham’s only qualm is that he dislikes being at a disadvantage. It’s troublesome enough that he
can’t think properly when Kaveh’s hands are on his skin, but it’s made worse by the fact that
Kaveh has the upper hand—or at least, that’s certainly how Kaveh acts.

Like right now: Kaveh sits on the counter with loose limbs, looking far too pleased with himself
for his spit or swallow joke. Alhaitham feels the sudden urge to unbalance him somehow, just to
prove that he can.

He carries the cup of coffee over to Kaveh and presents it to him. “Can you hold this yourself, or
are your wrists too tired for that, too?”

“My wrists aren’t tired,” Kaveh grumbles, taking the drink from him. “Thank you for the horribly
bitter cup of coffee.” He grasps the cup with two hands and lifts it to his nose, inhaling. “It smells
good, at least.”

“It also tastes good,” Alhaitham says. “You have too strong of a preference for sweets.”
Kaveh huffs. “Taste is subjective.”

“And yet you constantly criticize my aesthetic preferences.”

“That’s different. You buy hideous furniture.”

“Subjectively hideous furniture.”

Rolling his eyes, Kaveh takes a delicate sip of coffee. Alhaitham watches him as he does, and finds
himself admiring the most immaterial things: the mole below Kaveh’s right collarbone, exposed by
the wide collar of his pajama shirt; the way his bangs are ruffled, strands curling in five different
directions; how his slender fingers drum against the cup in his hands, nails clinking lightly against
the porcelain.

Alhaitham steps closer, bracketing himself between Kaveh’s legs. Kaveh starts to lean back to give
himself more room, before apparently realizing that he has nowhere to go. “What—what are you
doing?” Kaveh asks.

“Standing in the kitchen,” Alhaitham answers. He grips Kaveh’s knees and slowly slides his hands
up toward his thighs. “Watching you drink the coffee I made you.” He traces his fingers along the
hem of Kaveh’s thin shorts, and feels Kaveh’s legs twitch at the light touch. “And asking if you’re
free tonight.”

Kaveh stares at him with wide eyes and red cheeks. “Free…free for what, exactly?”

“Some stress relief.”

Kaveh goes still as Alhaitham smooths his thumbs back and forth along his thighs. “Y-You’ll have
to be more specific.”

“A sexual encounter, Kaveh.”

“What an arousing way of phrasing it,” Kaveh says. “You really are a master of seduction,
Alhaitham. My loins are burning with desire. Keep up that dirty talk, and I might come just from
the sound of your voice.”

“Hm.” Alhaitham slides his hands farther upward, bunching up Kaveh’s shorts until they meet the
crease between his legs and hips. He runs his fingers along Kaveh’s inner thighs, and Kaveh jolts,
nearly splashing the coffee out of his cup. “Would it be better if I said that I want to feel your
mouth on my cock?”

Kaveh sharply inhales, and his knuckles pale as he tightens his grip on the cup. “You—ah—th-
that…”

Alhaitham leans closer, still petting Kaveh’s thighs. “Would you be more persuaded if I said that I
also want to get on my knees and suck you off?”

At that, Kaveh visibly shivers. “Y-you…”

Formulating dirty talk that works on Kaveh, Alhaitham has discovered, is not that difficult. Kaveh
is a visual person, and prefers honesty—so Alhaitham merely needs to describe sex acts in direct
terms, and Kaveh instantly buckles.

Alhaitham really is inclined to believe Kaveh’s complaints about not getting laid, if this is all it
takes.
“Well, Kaveh?” Alhaitham asks. He slips his fingers beneath Kaveh’s shorts, grazing the short
hairs near his cock. “Are you amenable to that?” When Kaveh squirms at his touch, Alhaitham
smirks and adds, “Will you let me taste you later?”

“Oh, gods,” Kaveh breathes. “What the fuck.”

His wide eyes meet Alhaitham’s, irises matching the red of his cheeks. Alhaitham realizes that he
and Kaveh are easily close enough to kiss, slotted together like this.

That’s not his current objective, though.

“Do you want to see me with your cock in my mouth?” Alhaitham asks. “Are you wondering what
sounds I’ll make?” He squeezes Kaveh’s thighs, then leans forward until his lips brush Kaveh’s
ear. “Do you want to make me swallow when you come, Kaveh?”

“Fuck,” Kaveh hisses. Alhaitham runs a hand across his shorts and feels the firm outline of his
cock. “What—how are you so…”

“Heh.” Alhaitham drags a finger down to the where the tip of Kaveh’s cock pokes at the fabric of
his shorts. “Looks like your loins really are burning with desire.”

“Shut up,” Kaveh groans.

“Well? Are you interested?”

“If you’re going to rile me up like this, then you should just suck my cock now.”

Alhaitham very well might, if he weren’t determined to tease Kaveh right now. “Is that so? But I
thought you didn’t want to disrupt my routine.”

“I don’t!” Kaveh snaps, surprisingly agitated. “Ugh. I was being considerate, since I know you like
to stick to your stupid schedule. But as usual, my efforts are wasted.” Avoiding Alhaitham’s eyes,
he hunches his shoulders and takes a long sip of coffee.

Oh. So Kaveh was actually trying to be accommodating.

Now Alhaitham marginally feels like an ass.

“I…” He searches for words that won’t aggravate Kaveh further, and finds none; he’s far more
practiced in saying things that have the opposite effect. “I see.”

“And maybe,” Kaveh grumbles. “Maybe I’m interested. It depends how insufferable you are for
the rest of the day.”

“Even if I’m insufferable, didn’t you recently boast about your ability to dominate me? If you were
telling the truth, then you shouldn’t have any trouble putting me in my place.”

Kaveh’s eyebrows shoot upward. “You? No trouble dominating you? You’re the most difficult
person I know!”

“Difficult,” Alhaitham echoes. “And was I difficult last night?”

He knows that he wasn’t. And that’s yet another intriguing thing about sex with Kaveh—because
normally, Alhaitham is never that agreeable. Whenever Kaveh asks or insists on something,
Alhaitham always pushes back: he complains, or bickers, or does the opposite of what Kaveh
requested. He jumps on any chance to tease Kaveh or fire off a sarcastic comeback. He picks apart
half the things Kaveh says, and he rarely lets Kaveh have the last word. Essentially, the two of
them are opposite poles—while they don’t repel each other, they always contradict.

(Except they didn’t always contradict like this. Once, years ago, their opposite philosophies had
been more like melodies composed in counterpoint: independent, sometimes even dissonant, but
nonetheless complementary, and always part of the same song.

Now, though, they aren’t even playing in the same key. Every single note clashes, and the two of
them stumble along to mismatched rhythms.)

And yet, last night, Alhaitham had completely ceded control to Kaveh. He hadn’t pushed back at
all. He’d allowed Kaveh to yank his pants down, grope his ass, and insist that he’d fuck him—all
of which brought Alhaitham dangerously close to orgasm, and that was before Kaveh shoved his
fingers in Alhaitham’s mouth.

Kaveh didn’t even need to ask. He offered his fingers, and Alhaitham sucked on them without a
second thought.

Because he knew that it would feel good, and it did. It felt good for all of the reasons that the book
said it would, and for one more: the way Kaveh watched Alhaitham as he did it, his pupils blown
wide, lips slightly parted, something almost hungry in his expression.

In that moment, Alhaitham hadn’t doubted Kaveh’s promise to wreck him. It was all too clear that
Kaveh was capable, and that he absolutely intended to follow through.

Alhaitham is surprisingly invested in seeing that promise fulfilled. He doesn’t entirely understand
why, yet—but perhaps it has something to do with the simplicity of it all. Last night, the two of
them had matched each other’s rhythm for the first time in ages, when Alhaitham had almost
forgotten what it was like to be in synchrony with Kaveh. It makes him feel secure in the same sort
of way that his headphones do, although that isn’t the best way to articulate it. There’s more to it
than that.

But while Alhaitham is equally open to wrecking Kaveh in the same fashion, he gets the sense that
Kaveh currently feels safer occupying the dominant role. And that’s fine; Alhaitham has no
objections to their current dynamic. He doesn’t want to do anything that will upend their newfound
ability to cooperate.

That doesn’t mean he won’t still tease Kaveh every chance he gets, though.

“Maybe I’m misremembering,” Alhaitham says. “Could you remind me when I was disagreeable?
Was it when I let you grab my ass? When I let you leave these marks on my neck? When I let you
fuck my mouth with your fingers, to the point that I gagged?”

Kaveh shudders and closes his eyes, and a quiet moan hums in his throat. “Y-you were…somewhat
cooperative, I suppose.”

Alhaitham wonders how long it will take for Kaveh to realize that this isn’t as difficult as he’s
making it out to be. Kaveh is so determined to “prove” that he can dominate Alhaitham, except
there’s literally nothing to prove. Alhaitham thinks he’s made it fairly obvious that it won’t take
much to make him submit.

But if Kaveh needs to feel a sense of accomplishment, then Alhaitham can let him believe that he
needs to earn his dominance. His efforts will be entertaining to watch, at the very least.

“If I wasn’t compliant enough for your liking,” Alhaitham says, “then you’ll have to try harder to
convince me that you should be in charge.” He pinches Kaveh’s thighs and pulls back. “Before
dinner, then?”

Kaveh nods. He no longer seems quite as relaxed as before, though—his posture is a bit slouched,
and he chews on his lip as he regards the coffee in his hands.

Alhaitham is reminded of Kaveh’s earlier attempt to be considerate, and how he had

unintentionally rebuffed that effort. An unpleasant feeling twists in his gut, and before he can
process what he’s doing, he’s reaching out to take the cup of coffee from Kaveh’s hand.

Kaveh’s brow scrunches with a frown. “Wait, what…”

Alhaitham takes a sip of the coffee, then shakes his head. “Hm. Too bitter. I must have let the
water come to a boil by mistake.”

“I don’t think you did,” Kaveh says, as Alhaitham carries the cup over to the sink. “I was watching
—hey!”

Alhaitham dumps the coffee down the drain and rinses out the cup. “I’m remaking it.”

“That—did you just waste an entire cup of coffee?” Kaveh exclaims. “That doesn’t seem very
practical of you.”

“It’s perfectly practical, from my perspective. I don’t want you complaining that I don’t know how
to make a cup of coffee. If you ever said something when we had guests over, they might not drink
the coffee I made, and that would be even more wasteful.”

“I wouldn’t have—hold on. We never have guests. What are you…” Kaveh trails off when he sees
Alhaitham set a jar of sugar next to the stove. “Oh. Uh, I…I suppose you could remake it, then.”

Alhaitham spoons more beans into the grinder, and feels the strange hint of a smile tug at his lips.

“So, if I recall correctly,” Kaveh says, standing with his hands on his hips, “you requested that I
orally stimulate your genitalia. Is that right?”

Alhaitham sits at the foot of Kaveh’s bed and stares flatly at him. He has always believed that
words have power—and those particular words have the power to make his arousal evaporate like
dew in the desert. “Keep up that dirty talk,” he says, “and I might come just from your voice.”

“Ha, ha.” Kaveh tugs off his gloves and lays them on the nightstand next to the kink list. Evening
sunlight slants across the wood, shining a beam of light on the paper. “Anything else you’d like to
try, while I’m at it? I can multitask.”

“I’m surprised you haven’t mentioned restraining me, given how enthused you were last night.”

“Are you asking me to tie you up? Because I know you’re interested, too, or else it wouldn’t be on
our list.”

Alhaitham clears his throat. “That’s fine. And I assume you’ll try to dominate me, as well.”

“Only if you want.” Kaveh smirks. “Do you still think I’m incapable?”
“If you’re so certain that I have doubts, then I expect you’ll make a genuine effort to prove me
wrong.”

“A genuine effort, hm?” Kaveh stalks toward the bed and plants his hands on either side of
Alhaitham’s thighs, leaning into his space. “Careful with your words, Alhaitham . That almost
sounded like a veiled request for me to dominate you.”

His earrings dangle against his hair, glinting in the golden light. Each one consists of teal beads
strung together in a diamond shape, a bit longer than the earrings he usually wears. Alhaitham
remembers Kaveh buying them at the Grand Bazaar a few weeks ago, when the two of them went
shopping to restock on spices.

At first, Kaveh had lamented not being able to afford the earrings—and although Alhaitham had
intended to tell Kaveh that the earrings were immaterial in the grand scheme of things, something
entirely different had come out of his mouth: that Kaveh had paid too much for rent that month,
because their water bill was surprisingly lower than usual, and Alhaitham owed him a bit more
mora than the earrings cost.

Which was a ridiculous lie. Kaveh had actually increased their water bill with his absurdly long
showers, which he refused to curtail because that’s when I do most of my thinking, Alhaitham. (And
far be it from Alhaitham to discourage Kaveh from thinking. He rarely does enough of it—
although, when he does use his brain, it’s usually to overthink some insignificant matter.)

The earrings are pretty, though. They contrast nicely with Kaveh’s eyes…which are now staring at
Alhaitham expectantly, as if waiting for him to say something.

“What?” Alhaitham asks.

“Fantasizing about my mouth again?” Kaveh asks. “Thinking of ways for me to dominate you?”

Alhaitham refuses to admit that he was lost in thought over Kaveh’s accessories, so instead he says:
“Wondering how exactly you intend to restrain me, when you don’t have the proper equipment.”

Kaveh heaves a sigh. “Of course that’s where your mind went. How very practical.” He stands
back up and folds his arms across his chest. “But that does pose a problem. I hesitate to use
something improvisatory…and dendro vines seem a bit adventurous, for our first foray into
bondage…”

Dendro vines? How does Kaveh’s mind come up with these things? The thought hadn’t even
occurred to Alhaitham, but now that Kaveh has placed it in his mind, he can’t say he’s opposed.
“Fortunately for you,” Alhaitham says, “I did in fact do some shopping, albeit not at the Treasures
Street produce stall.”

“Oh, yes, that little prank of yours,” Kaveh grumbles. “Very clever. You had quite the laugh at my
expense.”

Alhaitham smirks. It was very clever, and Kaveh’s face upon realizing the trick had been priceless
—but that’s beside the point. “If you hadn’t looked so scandalized then, I might have taken you
shopping for toys with me. But seeing as you were so overwhelmed…”

“I—toys—you—” Kaveh sighs in frustration. “What fun equipment did you buy, then?”

Alhaitham leans down and retrieves a wooden box from beneath the foot of the bed. He’d brought
it into the room with him in case Kaveh agreed to test bondage—which had seemed like a near-
certainty, based on his previous reactions. “Take a look.”
He holds out the box, and Kaveh tentatively accepts it. When he flips open the lid and peers inside,
his eyebrows arch upward. “Handcuffs. You…you bought handcuffs.” He pinches one of the cuffs
and lifts them from the box for inspection. “This is expensive leather. How much did you spend on
these? No, you know what—as long as I don’t owe you, I don’t care.”

“Technically speaking,” Alhaitham says, “this is a joint endeavor, so we should be splitting the
costs. But since I went shopping on my own and you had no input on the purchases—and
considering that I have a higher income—I’ll foot the bill.”

“How generous,” Kaveh murmurs, still ogling the handcuffs. “Ha. So this is what you spend your
Acting Grand Sage salary on. If only the Akademiya knew. They’d lose their damn minds.”

“That’s their fault for giving me more money than I know what to do with.”

“And yet I’m still paying you rent.”

“Would you rather handle buying any future equipment we require? You might run into someone
you know while you’re shopping, and I know you love to worry about the opinions of others.”

“I don’t love to,” Kaveh mutters. “I—never mind. These will work well.”

“Rope is more flexible and provides more mobility,” Alhaitham explains, “but handcuffs carry
fewer risks and require less expertise, which makes them easier to use. I assume I won’t need much
mobility while you’re performing oral sex, so this seems like a suitable occasion to use them.”

Kaveh nods. “That makes sense—but, wait. You brought this box in here with you.” He looks
between the box and Alhaitham, then shakes the handcuffs at him. “That means you were thinking
about me restraining you!”

Alhaitham shrugs, hoping that the warmth glowing in his cheeks isn’t too noticeable. “Perhaps I
was imagining it the other way around.”

“You wish,” Kaveh says. “You know, maybe I’ll consider it, if you can go a few days without
pissing me off somehow.”

Well, if those are the terms, then Alhaitham will never get a chance to restrain Kaveh. That task is
about as impossible as a burgeon without a bloom. “I’ll try to be on my best behavior,” he says
dryly.

If he did have the chance to restrain Kaveh, though, he doesn’t think he’d stop at the handcuffs.
Alhaitham’s preferred fantasy also involves strapping a gag into Kaveh’s mouth and making him
ride Alhaitham, hands bound behind his back so that he struggles to keep his balance. He wants to
see the frustrated gleam in Kaveh’s eyes, wants to hear his muffled whines of protest when
Alhaitham refuses to make things easier for him.

“Alright,” Kaveh says. “Oral sex, handcuffs, some domination. I—I can do that.” He stares down
at the handcuffs for a long moment, and Alhaitham wonders if Kaveh is once again overthinking.
“One more thing, before we begin our joint research project—”

“Don’t call it that,” Alhaitham says, reflexively.

“How else should I refer to it, then?”

“Anything else.” Alhaitham swallows and looks away, not sure why his chest suddenly feels
knotted up. “And technically speaking, our experiment already started last night.”
“Last night?” Kaveh says. “But I wasn’t trying to test out kinks. I just wanted to see you come.”

Alhaitham scrutinizes Kaveh’s face, searching for some trace of a joke. He wasn’t trying to test out
kinks? How exactly would Kaveh describe the act of pinning Alhaitham to the wall, murmuring
filthy things in his ear, and fucking his mouth with his fingers until he came? Alhaitham had
discovered several new things about himself during that encounter, one of them being that he most
definitely has a submissive streak.

In what world was that not testing kinks?!

“You were saying?” Alhaitham prompts, almost certain that the flush on his face has become
noticeable.

“We should establish safewords,” Kaveh says. “One to indicate that things should continue,
another to indicate that we need to slow down or pause to discuss something, and a third to indicate
that we should immediately stop altogether.”

Fortunately for them, Alhaitham has been considering the issue ever since he read that chapter in
the book. “Bloom, dendro core, and burgeon?”

“Oh, thank goodness,” Kaveh says, sounding genuinely relieved. “I really couldn’t come up with a
good set of words. I spent almost an hour earlier trying to think of some.”

Alhaitham can imagine that: Kaveh sitting at his desk, tapping a pencil to his lips as he bounces his
leg and murmurs to himself. It’s not an erotic image, by any means, but the thought warms
Alhaitham’s chest nonetheless.

“Should we begin?” Alhaitham asks.

Kaveh nods and tosses the handcuffs onto the bed. “Let’s start by getting you out of those clothes.”

Clothes, plural? Alhaitham had only expected to undo his pants for this. “All of them?”

“I want you naked,” Kaveh says. He reaches down and untucks Alhaitham’s shirt. “Come on. Take
this off.”

Frowning, Alhaitham removes his headphones and pulls his shirt over his head. He tosses it toward
the pile of pillows further up the bed, then slips the headphones back over his ears. “I don’t see
why this is necessary.”

Kaveh folds his arms and smiles down at Alhaitham, looking quite satisfied with himself. “It’s
necessary because we’ve agreed that I’m in charge, and I said so.”

Ah. So Kaveh intends to take advantage of being in control. Not surprising.

“And,” Kaveh adds, dragging a hand down Alhaitham’s chest, “because I’ve just decided that I
want to touch you here, too.”

“Nipple play,” Alhaitham clarifies.

“Ugh. Such an unattractive term.” Kaveh reaches down and undoes Alhaitham’s pants. “You’re the
linguistics expert. Isn’t there anything else I can call them?”

Alhaitham considers several creative alternatives, and instantly dismisses all of them. “Everything I
can think of sounds worse.”
“Let me think, then…” Kaveh tugs at the pants, and Alhaitham lifts his feet, allowing him to pull
the garment off. The bedroom air is cool against the bare skin of his legs, and he suddenly feels
overly exposed. “Oh, I’ve got one,” Kaveh says, with a teasing smile that makes Alhaitham feel
concerned. “How about chestly epicenters?”

“What.”

“Not poetic enough for you?” Kaveh asks, dropping Alhaitham’s pants onto the floor. “Well, I’m
an expert on artistry, so I’m sure I can do better. Maybe…” He snaps his fingers. “Pectoral jewels.”

Alhaitham snorts, just barely holding back a laugh. “The worst abuse of the Sumerian language
that I’ve ever encountered.”

“Fine, I give up. I’ll play with your nipples,” Kaveh grumbles, dragging out the word. “Unless you
think there’s a word in another language…?”

“Perhaps we could leave linguistics out of the bedroom.”

“Is that so? I would have thought you’d like that.” Bracing one warm hand against Alhaitham’s
thigh, Kaveh leans forward and retrieves the handcuffs from the mattress. “Alright, let’s…”

Alhaitham reaches up and pinches one of Kaveh’s earrings between his fingers, prompting Kaveh
to pause and hum in confusion. Brushing Kaveh’s hair behind his ear, Alhaitham pulls off the
backing and slips the earring off, then repeats those actions for the other one. Holding the earrings
in his palm, he presents them for Kaveh to take.

“Oh,” Kaveh says, plucking the earrings from Alhaitham’s hand. “Right. Those might get in the
way.” He clambers across the bed to deposit them on the nightstand, then kneels on the mattress
behind Alhaitham. “Arms behind your back.”

Alhaitham complies, holding his wrists together against his lower back. “There were handcuffs that
attached to a collar,” he says, “but I wasn’t sure if that would interest you.”

He feels Kaveh fumble with the cuffs behind him. “Collar—like a—” Kaveh is silent for a long
moment, and Alhaitham suspects that he’s imagining what that would look like. “Hah.”

Then he traces a finger down Alhaitham’s back, and Alhaitham shivers at his touch. He rolls his
shoulders and forces himself to sit still as Kaveh continues dragging his finger down, down, until it
reaches the small of his back.

Kaveh’s hand brushes against the curve of Alhaitham’s ass, and then he dips a finger beneath the
waistband of his underwear. Alhaitham involuntarily arches his back, not sure whether he wants to
lean into the touch or pull away.

Kaveh momentarily withdraws his hand, and then he brushes Alhaitham’s hair away from his
neck, fingers resting lightly on the back of his throat. “You’d look good in that,” Kaveh finally
says.

Alhaitham inhales sharply. The way Kaveh said you’d look good—Alhaitham can only imagine
how Kaveh would look at him, if he were restrained like that.

He should have bought the other cuffs.

“Th-there were also…” Alhaitham shudders when Kaveh smooths his palm back down his spine.
“Also cuffs that connected to the…thighs or ankles.”
Is it starting already? Unbelievable. Kaveh hasn’t even bound his wrists yet, and Alhaitham is
struggling to form complete sentences.

He hears Kaveh inhale shakily. “You’re giving me too many ideas, Alhaitham. You know I’m a
visual person.”

“I’m aware.”

In fact, Alhaitham had been trying to tease Kaveh by planting those images in his mind—but now
it’s backfiring, because all he can think about is being tied up while Kaveh tells him how good he
looks, being immobilized while Kaveh has his way with him.

Fuck. He’s getting hard.

Alhaitham feels Kaveh secure the cuffs around his wrists. The soft leather is more comfortable
than he expected, although he doubts he’d want to keep his arms in this position for hours.

“Is that alright?” Kaveh asks, fingers brushing against Alhaitham’s palms.

“Yes,” Alhaitham says.

“Tell me if you have any circulation issues, so that I can take them off right away.” Kaveh grips his
shoulders and leans close to his ear. “You know, you won’t be able to cover your face, with your
arms bound like this.”

“I fail to see why I would need to.”

“Oh, you will.” Tapping one of Alhaitham’s shoulders, Kaveh says, “Sit farther up on the bed,
against the pillows. I’ll play with you there.”

Play with you. He says it like Alhaitham is a toy for his amusement.

Alhaitham almost wants to hear him say more things like that.

At Kaveh’s request, he makes himself comfortable among the multicolored array of pillows at the
head of the bed. Alhaitham has always thought that Kaveh sleeps with far more pillows than
necessary, and he personally fails to see the utility in having so many—but now, at least, the wall
of cushions helps him comfortably prop himself up.

Alhaitham sits with his legs extended and his ankles crossed, aware that his cock is straining very
prominently against his underwear. And he knows that Kaveh has noticed, too, because it doesn’t
seem like an accident when Kaveh crawls up the bed and brushes a hand against the outline of his
cock.

“Ah, uncross these legs,” Kaveh says, nudging Alhaitham’s ankles. “That’s not good for
circulation.”

“Now you show concern for good posture?” Alhaitham says, although he does as Kaveh asks.
Kaveh has always had a terrible habit of giving himself neck pain, the way he sits when he’s
working on designs—so Alhaitham suspects that circulation isn’t his real motive here.

He’s proven right when Kaveh grabs his uncrossed legs and spreads them far apart, then kneels on
the mattress between them. “That’s better,” Kaveh says. His hand settles dangerously high on
Alhaitham’s thigh. “Now…”
“Aren’t you going to undress?”

Kaveh raises his eyebrows. “Why would I? I don’t need to be naked to touch your chest or suck
you off. That would be unnecessary.”

Alhaitham grits his teeth. Unnecessary? Kaveh certainly hadn’t cared about necessity when he
stripped Alhaitham down like this. He’s being cheeky.

And frustratingly, Alhaitham likes that. Arousal tightens below his stomach at the realization that
Kaveh can be as infuriating as he wants right now, and he’ll still get his way—because Kaveh is in
control, and Alhaitham isn’t allowed to stop him.

“Unnecessary,” Alhaitham echoes. “And yet you wanted me to take all my clothes off.”

“Not all of them,” Kaveh says, tapping Alhaitham’s chest. “I’m letting you keep the underwear for
now. And the headphones can stay, too.”

“How considerate.”

(Hmph. It is considerate.)

“What’s wrong?” Kaveh asks teasingly. His lips part in a toothy smile. “Do you feel exposed? Is it
embarrassing to be naked while I’m fully clothed?”

Embarrassing isn’t quite the word. It’s dizzying in an indefinable way, to be bared like this while
Kaveh is completely covered up. Alhaitham feels vulnerable. Like he’s at Kaveh’s mercy.

He supposes that’s probably the goal.

It’s working.

“And surely you don’t mind being shirtless,” Kaveh adds, “when you walk around in transparent
shirts most of the time.”

“That’s not for sexual reasons.”

“Oh, I thought maybe it was a power play. You know, Look at these nice tits that you aren’t
allowed to touch. It’s like you’re taunting everyone.”

Alhaitham arches his back slightly, pushing his chest out. Won’t Kaveh just touch him already?
Apparently his idea of foreplay is nonstop chattering—just like the unending small talk that
Alhaitham seeks to avoid by never working in his actual office. “I’m not invested in how the public
reacts to my torso,” Alhaitham says. “And I doubt that many people have that sort of reaction,
anyway.”

“Trust me, they do. You should hear—well, never mind. Regardless of their reactions, they aren’t
allowed to touch.” Smirking, Kaveh cups Alhaitham’s chest with his hands and squeezes. “Unlike
me.”

Kaveh stares at him expectantly. Alhaitham knows what he’s waiting for him to say—and because
of his damnable curiosity, he says it anyway. “What sort of things are people saying, exactly?”

“Oh, you know.” Kaveh drags his hands down the muscles of Alhaitham’s chest and grips his
waist. “I’d love to use his chest as a pillow. Look at those pectorals—is he really just a scholar? I
wonder how many mercenaries he could beat in a fight.”
Kaveh’s ruby eyes glimmer with a joke, and Alhaitham wonders if something has gone over his
head. “I fail to see why I should care about those reactions,” Alhaitham says.

At that, Kaveh’s smirk turns downright infernal, and Alhaitham realizes that he’s definitely walked
into a trap. “Because, Alhaitham,” he says, “it’s not what people are saying. It’s what they’re
thinking.”

Alhaitham’s eyes widen. He’s starting to sense the actual theme of Kaveh’s dirty talk, and feels
foolish for not anticipating it sooner.

Kaveh pushes his hands back up Alhaitham’s chest. “Those people are thinking, I wonder how
sensitive he is there.” He lightly brushes his fingers over Alhaitham’s nipples, sending a thrill
straight to his cock. “And I wonder what those look like when they’re hard.” He pinches both
nipples lightly and rubs them between his fingers, tugging and twisting.

Alhaitham sucks in a shuddering breath as he watches them visibly stiffen at the touch, a sight
made lewder by the way Kaveh laughs in satisfaction. Alhaitham instinctively tries to cover his
chest with his hands, but his wrists tug uselessly against the leather cuffs encircling them, unable to
move.

His face burns, and he squeezes his eyes shut in an attempt to hide from the sight.

Kaveh’s voice is inescapable, though. “I wish I could suck on them,” he says, and suddenly his
warm mouth is pressed to Alhaitham’s chest, tongue flicking against one of his nipples.

Alhaitham jerks and squirms his hips, opening his eyes against his better judgment. Kaveh peers up
at him through messy bangs, eyes glinting with satisfaction. He nips and sucks, sending pulses of
arousal to Alhaitham’s cock that make him roll his hips involuntarily, a moan on the tip of his
tongue.

He’d known from experience that his nerves connected that way—but he’d had no idea that he was
this sensitive. Alhaitham doesn’t see how he can fairly tease Kaveh for being easy to rile up, when
he’s already painfully hard just from having his nipples touched.

Alhaitham clenches his jaw. He’s not going to come from this, is he? Kaveh will never shut up if
he does. Alhaitham can already imagine the nonstop taunts he’ll have to listen to, if that happens.

Who knew that you were secretly so sensitive, Alhaitham? You might be hardhearted, but those
pretty nipples of yours respond so easily. I never expected you to come in your underwear just from
me playing with them. Do you wear those transparent shirts because you like to play with your
chest when you’re alone, and watch your nipples get hard?

Fuck, fuck, why is his imagination making him feel even more turned on? He was supposed to find
those imaginary taunts annoying. He’s supposed to find Kaveh annoying.

“And of course,” Kaveh says, with a mischievous smile, “people think to themselves, I wonder if
he likes a bit of pain.”

He raises his eyebrows in a question—and when Alhaitham simply stares at the ceiling without
objecting, Kaveh hums. “I’ll count down for you. Five, four…three…”

Suddenly, he pinches both nipples hard enough to sting. Alhaitham gasps and bucks his hips, a
delicious rush of heat surging through his veins.

“Hm, I think the answer is yes,” Kaveh says. He leans forward and places a messy kiss against
Alhaitham’s chest, then sucks at the nipple he’d neglected before. Alhaitham feels a trail of saliva
crawl down his skin, and shivers. “Are we still good?”

“Good,” Alhaitham manages to say, between heavy breaths. He’s now legitimately concerned that
he might come just from this. “But I—I doubt anyone besides you…has those sorts of thoughts.”

“Well, if they do,” Kaveh says, pulling back, “they’ll unfortunately never have a chance to
discover the answers to their questions.” He lightly grips the back of Alhaitham’s head and tilts it
downward, forcing Alhaitham to meet his eyes. “But I’ve certainly made a few discoveries, haven’t
I?”

“Congratulations,” Alhaitham mutters.

“Congratulations?” Kaveh says. He reaches down and rubs Alhaitham’s cock through his
underwear. “Is this my reward?”

Alhaitham groans. With his wrists cuffed behind him, he can’t shove away Kaveh’s hands or wrest
back control. All he can do is sit there while Kaveh toys with him.

“It seems you like not being able to move,” Kaveh says. “Do I have that right? Do you like that I
can touch you wherever I want, and you can’t do anything to stop me?” Still rubbing Alhaitham’s
cock, he reaches up and pinches a nipple. “You don’t have to answer. I think I have enough
evidence to come to a conclusion.”

“You—your reasoning is…potentially flawed,” Alhaitham says, desperately willing his body to
calm down. “I could favor being tied up for…for other reasons.”

“Then here’s another,” Kaveh says. He trails his finger up Alhaitham’s chest and throat, then taps
at his lips. “If you need to moan, you won’t be able to cover your mouth. I’ll hear every lovely
sound you make.”

Alhaitham’s breathing quickens, and a sweet feeling pools low in his abdomen. He grits his teeth
and resists the urge to thrust against Kaveh’s hand.

“I’m surprised that you like my dirty talk so much,” Kaveh comments. “Here I thought you’d be
telling me to shut up.”

Alhaitham should. He should tell him to shut up.

He doesn’t.

“Should I be taking notes?” Kaveh wonders.

Alhaitham stares at him in disbelief. “During sex?”

“I mean, this is an inquiry to figure out what arouses us…”

“I’ll remember later.” Alhaitham rolls his hips pointedly. “Don’t you have something to attend to?”

A new smirk seeps onto Kaveh’s face. “Someone’s eager.” He drags the tip of his finger along the
outline of Alhaitham’s cock, stopping at the spot where precum has dampened the fabric. “You
aren’t even trying to hide how much you want it.”

“I don’t see why I should, when you told me last night not to bother.”

“I’m just surprised you’re being so honest.” Kaveh leans down and mouths over the clothed head
of Alhaitham’s cock, and the warmth of that light touch makes Alhaitham twitch. “Do you think
I’ll still take you seriously during our debates, once I’ve seen you become a wreck like this?”

“Should I stop taking you seriously because you came in your pants from sucking on my fingers?”

“I—ugh!” Kaveh yanks Alhaitham’s underwear down, exposing his flushed cock. Grabbing his
hips, he says, “Be grateful for how generous I am, since I’m still willing to suck your dick after
that comment.”

“Truly benevolent,” Alhaitham says. “Thank you so much, Kaveh.”

“I’ll make you thank me sincerely,” Kaveh grumbles. His nails dig into Alhaitham’s skin, stinging
slightly. “And I’m not going to let you off easy for your attitude. You don’t get to come until I say
so. Are we clear?”

“Fine. Will you get on with it now?”

“Agreeing so easily? Oh, I’ll definitely have fun with that.”

Kaveh runs his nails across Alhaitham’s legs, tracing shapes on his skin. Then he tugs Alhaitham’s
underwear farther down his thighs, leaving the fabric to partly restrain Alhaitham’s legs.

That done, Kaveh’s fingers move higher, and one of his hands lightly grasps Alhaitham’s cock. He
rubs the tip and slicks precum down the side, which feels good—but it’s not what Alhaitham wants.
He wants Kaveh’s mouth.

Just when Alhaitham is about to start making demands, Kaveh finally bends over and licks his
cock, his hair tickling Alhaitham’s skin.

Alhaitham takes a trembling breath and tries not to be overwhelmed. He’d underestimated how
potent this image would be: Kaveh between his legs, one hand holding his hair back from his face,
his tongue dragging up the length of Alhaitham’s cock. The sight alone is nearly enough to make
Alhaitham come.

Except that isn’t an option—not only because his dignity demands that he last longer, but because
he apparently requires Kaveh’s permission to orgasm.

Kaveh suddenly sits up and crawls over to the nightstand, grumbling. Alhaitham hums in
confusion, which only mounts when he sees Kaveh grab a thin red ribbon from one of the drawers.
He watches as Kaveh gathers his hair back and ties it in a low ponytail behind his head, pulling the
shaggy strands away from his face.

Oh. His hair had been getting in the way.

Alhaitham should have anticipated that issue, the same way he’d thought to remove Kaveh’s
earrings earlier—but after being touched and teased by Kaveh so much, he’s far past the point of
predictive thinking.

With a satisfied nod, Kaveh bends over and takes Alhaitham’s cock into his mouth.

“Fuck,” Alhaitham gasps, hips jerking. Kaveh’s mouth is warm and wet in a way that a fist isn’t,
and his tongue keeps moving, swirling unpredictably along Alhaitham’s skin. He’s somehow even
better than Alhaitham imagined he’d be.

As Kaveh continues to lick and suck, he keeps a hand braced against Alhaitham’s hip, as if warning
him not to thrust again. Instead, Kaveh bobs his head up and down on his own, working his mouth
so that drool slicks Alhaitham’s cock and makes the slide wetter.

Alhaitham’s hands twitch with the urge to grab Kaveh’s head or stroke his hair. He’s powerless to
touch him, though, with both his hands bound behind his back.

Kaveh peers up at him. “Would you like me to take the whole thing?”

Alhaitham blinks rapidly. The words spin incomprehensibly in his mind. “The…you—yes…?”

With a smirk, Kaveh widens his mouth and slides the whole way down Alhaitham’s cock, until his
nose is pressed to the hairs above his groin. Alhaitham feels the tip of his cock bump against
something solid, and Kaveh gags quietly before easing his lips back to the head.

“Wh—” Alhaitham’s face burns. He wishes he could cover his mouth, to hide the way that his lips
part with desperate pants for breath. “What—what did you—”

Kaveh tilts his head and repeats the motion, this time without gagging. He hums around
Alhaitham’s cock, and Alhaitham shivers at the sensation. It’s wet, and tight, and Kaveh looks so
damn good with his lips stretched wide like that. The sight nearly drives Alhaitham insane.

Kaveh pulls off his cock with a gasp, spit dripping from his lips. “What did I do, you said?” He
reaches under Alhaitham to squeeze his ass, then runs his lips along his cock and places a wet kiss
on the tip. “I’ll give you a hint. I took you deep into my throat. Any guesses, Haitham?”

“Deepthroat,” Alhaitham mutters. He’s fairly certain he can feel his ears burning under his
headphones.

“Very good,” Kaveh says. “I’d expect nothing less from a Haravatat prodigy like you.” He lifts
Alhaitham’s ass off the bed, pulling his cock closer to his mouth. “Did you like that? Do you like
seeing me take your cock all the way down?”

Alhaitham squeezes his eyes shut. He did. He liked it too much. He doesn’t know how he’s going
to last.

Kaveh resumes working his mouth along Alhaitham’s cock, occasionally taking it back into his
throat. Before long, Alhaitham feels an unmistakable tension building around his hips. “K-Kaveh,”
he says, thighs shaking. “I—I’m going to—”

Instantly, Kaveh’s mouth disappears from his cock, and Alhaitham’s eyes snap open. “Not until I
say so, remember?”

Alhaitham groans. He’d nearly forgotten about that rule.

“If it really upsets you,” Kaveh says, “you can safeword. But personally, I’d like to make you
squirm a bit.” Holding Alhaitham’s gaze, he sucks lightly at his cock. “You look good when you’re
desperate.”

Alhaitham’s face feels impossibly hotter, and he turns his head to the side, staring at the stained
glass window. Maybe he can count the panes of glass. Maybe that will distract him until Kaveh
finally lets him come.

Kaveh laughs. “I told you that you wouldn’t be able to hide your face with your wrists tied up. Oh,
speaking of which…” He pointedly squeezes Alhaitham’s ass. “You can’t come unless you’re
looking at me.”
Alhaitham turns to face him, eyes wide. A sound of disbelief stutters in his throat.

“Hm.” Kaveh’s tongue flicks just below the head of Alhaitham’s cock, and he nearly shouts.
“Maybe you shouldn’t have agreed to my rule so easily?”

Realization slams into Alhaitham. He opens his mouth to argue—except Kaveh is right. Alhaitham
did agree too easily. He hadn’t even considered the possibility that Kaveh would add conditions.

It makes Alhaitham feel like he’s been pinned in an entirely different way, restrained by Kaveh’s
words alone. His head feels light, and he feels his body go lax, helpless to stop anything Kaveh
does.

Kaveh moves one hand to tap Alhaitham’s thigh. “How’s your circulation? Are your wrists
alright?”

A few seconds pass before Alhaitham manages to make sense of the question. He flexes his hands
and twists his wrists, and doesn’t detect any issues. “Good—or bloom, I—”

And then Kaveh’s mouth is back on his cock, sucking and teasing relentlessly.

Would it be so bad, if Alhaitham came without permission? Kaveh hadn’t named a specific
penalty. Really, Alhaitham has no reason to comply with his orders—except that he likes doing
what Kaveh says, likes forcing himself to obey.

He’s running out of patience, though.

“Kaveh,” Alhaitham growls, as Kaveh’s wet lips slide up and down his cock. “Come on, that—
that’s enough. Stop teasing—”

Kaveh’s mouth pops off his cock. “I don’t like that attitude,” he says, and Alhaitham groans in
frustration. “But since I’m so benevolent, Alhaitham, I’ll offer you a way out. Instead of being
rude, why not try asking me nicely?” A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. “I seem to recall that
begging is on our list?”

“Wh—what—I—”

“Lost for words? You’re usually so articulate.” Kaveh arches his eyebrows, watching as Alhaitham
fumbles for words that aren’t fuck, fuck you Kaveh, let me fucking come. When several seconds
have passed and Alhaitham still hasn’t spoken, Kaveh adds, “But don’t worry. I can tell you what
to say. You just need to repeat after me, and then I’ll let you come.”

Nerves flicker in Alhaitham’s stomach, and he stares at Kaveh with wide eyes. Fuck. What on earth
is Kaveh going to make him say? Alhaitham is an idiot. He never should have agreed to this so
easily.

Kaveh hums in thought, then nods. “Alright. Just say, Your mouth feels so good, Kaveh. Thank you
for sucking my cock. Please, please let me come in your mouth.”

Shame burns in Alhaitham’s chest at the mere thought. “I’m not saying that.”

“Then I’m not letting you come.”

“What?”

“You agreed to come when I say so,” Kaveh says. “And unless you beg nicely like I asked, then
I’m not saying so. Or…” Alhaitham growls in protest, and Kaveh leans down to kiss the crease of
his hip. “You still have your safeword, too. There’s no shame in using that, if you’ve really had
enough.”

Alhaitham keeps his mouth clamped shut. He doesn’t want to stop—but he doesn’t want to say
those unnecessary things, either. Even just imagining those words coming out of his mouth makes
him feel ridiculous.

“Alright,” Kaveh says slowly. He still hasn’t resumed touching Alhaitham, although that’s
probably a good thing, since Alhaitham is teetering on the brink of orgasm. “Your third option is
that we end things here, and you can spend the rest of the night knowing that you deprived yourself
of a perfectly good orgasm.”

That—that’s the punishment if Alhaitham doesn’t comply? Kaveh will fucking blue-ball him?

Alhaitham scrambles to organize his thoughts, to come up with a rebuttal. “I—I’ll sound silly
saying those words,” he says. “You won’t find any of that arousing.”

To his dismay, Kaveh responds with an exhaled laugh. “Oh, it’s not the words themselves.” He
leers up at Alhaitham. “It’s how embarrassed you’ll feel when you say them.”

What? That’s what he’s getting off on? The fact that Alhaitham doesn’t want to say those things?

It’s humiliating—and it’s also horribly appealing, the way that Kaveh has managed to trap him
like this.

Alhaitham swallows. “And…and what if I’m not embarrassed? That defeats the purpose.”

“If you weren’t embarrassed, you would have spoken those words by now.” Still smiling
infuriatingly, Kaveh sits up and kisses Alhaitham’s chest, sucking at one nipple while he pinches
the other. The opposite sensations send a punch of arousal to Alhaitham’s gut, nearly strong
enough to make him come. “Are you going to make me wring this out of you? Come on,
Alhaitham. Thank you, Kaveh, you make me feel so good. I’m dying to come down your throat.
Please let me come, please.”

“I don’t even want that,” Alhaitham blurts out.

“You don’t want to come?”

“No, I meant—” Alhaitham cuts himself off, but it’s too late. Kaveh looks up at him with glinting
eyes, his gaze almost predatory.

“You meant what?” Kaveh prompts. “Do tell. Maybe I’ll amend my requirements, if I like your
answer.” He trails his hands down Alhaitham’s stomach and lets them rest on his thighs. “What do
you want, Alhaitham?”

Alhaitham can’t tell if this is a better deal or a worse one. In another situation, he might get the
upper hand by brazenly telling Kaveh what he actually wants—but right now, he’s absolutely
certain that Kaveh will use this to tease him.

The image has been on his mind for days, though. If there’s a chance Kaveh will let him fulfill that
fantasy…

“I’d rather come on your face,” Alhaitham says, nearly a whisper.

Kaveh’s eyes go wide, and his cheeks darken with a blush. “Y-you—oh—ha, um.” He blinks as if
he’s been flicked between the eyes. It takes several seconds for him to compose himself, during
which his blush spreads to his ears and neck. “You—you want to make me your canvas, is that it?
How artistic.” He leans closer and smiles. “Maybe you do have some aesthetic sensibilities, after
all.”

Alhaitham bites his tongue and glares, resisting the urge to say anything that will get him into more
trouble.

Kaveh laughs, and it’s a light musical sound, bright like the glow of his cheeks. “Alright, alright. I
appreciate your honesty. I think I can be persuaded to give you what you want…but I need you to
do one little thing for me.”

This time, Alhaitham isn’t stupid enough to agree right away. “What one thing?”

“Tell me why you want to come on my face.”

“What?” Alhaitham says, as Kaveh slides down the bed and bends forward. “Why—why does that
matt—ah!” Kaveh’s lips close around the head of his cock and suck, bringing him dangerously
close to the edge. “Hah. Fuck.”

Kaveh leans back and says, “For research purposes.” He grips Alhaitham’s cock and gives it a few
teasing strokes. “And because I think the answer will embarrass you. Oh, but don’t lie—that might
compromise my findings. It wouldn’t be in the scholarly spirit of things.” He lowers his head and
lazily swirls his tongue around the tip of Alhaitham’s cock, staring up at him as he does.

Scholarly spirit, findings, Alhaitham doesn’t care, doesn’t even understand the question, just wants
Kaveh to stop torturing him. “I—it would look good—”

“My face doesn’t already look good?”

“What? Of course it does—”

“Then why would you want to sully my pretty face?”

Alhaitham groans and tugs uselessly at the restraints around his wrists. He can’t take much more
of this. He needs Kaveh to let him come. “Not sullying.”

“What, then?”

“I—it—” He can’t think of words right now. All he knows is that Kaveh would look good with
Alhaitham’s cock spilling onto his face. “I—decorating, I don’t—”

“Decorating?” Kaveh echoes. “Oh, now we’re getting somewhere.” He presses a kiss to the side of
Alhaitham’s cock. “So, what is it? Do you think it would be nice to lose control and make a mess
of me? Do you like the idea that I won’t stop you, that I’ll let you do that?” Kaveh takes Alhaitham
in his mouth and moans, looking up through half-lidded eyes—and Alhaitham lets out a desperate
moan of his own, barely holding himself back. “Do you want to mark me as yours? You’ve always
been a bit possessive. Of course, I wouldn’t let just anyone do that, but I’ll let you, Alhaitham.”

Alhaitham takes a trembling breath. “Kaveh—Kaveh—”

“I’ll let you come on my face,” Kaveh says. “I want you to look at my decorated cheeks and see
how good I made you feel. But first—which reason is it, Alhaitham? You need to tell me,
remember?”
What? He needs to do what? All he can think about now is the image of Kaveh’s face looking like
that. “Reason—I—all of that, Kaveh, all of it, just…just…”

But Kaveh just sits still and stares blankly up at him, as if Alhaitham still hasn’t given the right
answer.

Alhaitham whines in despair and thrusts his hips upward. He doesn’t know what else to say. He
doesn’t know which answer to pick. He can’t think. “Kaveh, please,” he says, his breath hitching.
“I—all of that—just let me come, please, let me come on your face, Kaveh, please…”

Kaveh breaks into a smile. “Alright,” he says, and finally resumes stroking Alhaitham’s cock.
Alhaitham nearly sobs with relief. “Since you begged so nicely…there we go.” He kisses the head
and quickly slides his hand up and down. “Go on, Alhaitham. Show me how good you feel. Come
on my face.”

A moan slips from Alhaitham’s lips, and he jerks his hips as he comes.

Gasping, he watches as Kaveh catches some of his release on his lips and face. It drips down his
chin and cheeks, leaving streaks on his skin, and he takes it so willingly, even parting his mouth to
let some land on his tongue.

Alhaitham shudders, nails digging into his palms. Another moan stutters in his throat at the sight of
Kaveh gazing up at him, hand still stroking his cock, trails of white clinging to his face. He looks
wickedly pleased, as if Alhaitham is somehow the one demeaned by this—and maybe that’s right,
because Alhaitham can only sprawl there with his hands bound as he makes a mess of Kaveh,
unable to control himself.

You asked for this, Kaveh’s eyes seem to say, as he messily licks Alhaitham’s cock and lets him
dirty his skin. You begged to come on me like this.

Alhaitham’s chest heaves for breath. The last of his climax courses through him, and then warmth
settles into his bones, with a sense of calm that makes his whole body go limp.

Kaveh swipes a finger across his cheek and into his mouth. Winking at Alhaitham, he pointedly
sucks it clean, and Alhaitham lets out a weak groan. (It’s a scrunched-up wink that twists half his
face, because Kaveh has never quite figured out the muscle movements for a proper wink—but it
doesn’t matter, because right now, everything Kaveh does seems incredibly appealing.)

“Hm,” Kaveh says. “You know, I’ve always considered myself more of a visual person, but those
nice moans of yours have me reconsidering. It’s a shame you held back most of them.” He waves a
hand at Alhaitham. “Turn around so I can take the cuffs off. Are your hands still okay?”

Wincing from stiff muscles, Alhaitham twists so that Kaveh can free his hands. The moment he
does, Alhaitham brings his hands forward and stretches his arms in front of himself, sighing in
relief.

Kaveh startles him by grabbing one of his hands, his thumb gently massaging Alhaitham’s wrist
and palm. “No pain? Numbness?”

Alhaitham stares at him in confusion. There’s still a mess dripping down Kaveh’s face, but he
doesn’t seem to care, intent on soothing Alhaitham’s hands. “No. And you don’t have to—”

“We can talk more later,” Kaveh interrupts, switching hands, “but were you bothered by anything
we did?”
“I’m fine.” Although he’s in a post-orgasmic haze, Alhaitham can recall enough to know that
Kaveh hadn’t crossed any boundaries. Currently, the only thing that bothers him is the fact that
Kaveh’s face needs to be cleaned off. “Your face…”

“I hope you’re not about to complain,” Kaveh grumbles, his thumb digging into the meat of
Alhaitham’s palm. “I meant it when I said that I wouldn’t let anyone else do that. You should be
appreciative.”

Alhaitham feels his cheeks heat anew. It stirs a strange feeling in his chest, hearing that Kaveh
trusts him, only him, enough for something like that. “I have no complaints.” With the hand Kaveh
isn’t holding, he reaches up and swipes his thumb through a smear of white under Kaveh’s left eye,
wiping it away. “You shouldn’t let that dry on your face, though.”

“I’ll get to it,” Kaveh mutters. He gives Alhaitham’s hand a curt squeeze, then releases it. “Let me
know if you feel any pain later. Ugh, where’d I put the paper and pencil…?”

He crawls up the bed and grabs the list off the nightstand, then roots around the drawers until he
comes up with a small notebook and a pencil. Alhaitham squints at Kaveh as he sits cross-legged
on the bed next to him and starts mumbling to himself, jotting down notes every few seconds.

His…his face is still covered in semen. Alhaitham grimaces at the thought of how it would feel to
have that dry on his skin, and on his face, of all places. “Do you want me to get—”

Kaveh shushes him. “Hold on. Before I forget.”

He mutters and scribbles for at least two more minutes. During that time, Alhaitham pulls his
underwear back on, then stands and stretches his arms and legs, not sure what else he’s supposed to
do with himself. When he sits back down on the bed, Kaveh is still scrutinizing the list.

Finally, Kaveh nods and sets the papers and pencil on the nightstand. “I’ll go clean my face. Don’t
run off this time.”

He jumps to his feet and crosses the room, then disappears out the door.

Alhaitham almost follows him—except he’s not sure what he would do if he did. Clean Kaveh’s
face himself?

Perhaps he should. That book had mentioned the psychological need for reassurance and validation
from one’s partner after having sex, in order to offset the emotional intensity of some kinks. Of
course, Alhaitham feels fine one way or the other, but Kaveh is a much more sensitive person. He
might benefit from some sort of aftercare.

Don’t run off this time. Hm. Kaveh had been irritated this morning, too, when he mentioned how
Alhaitham retreated with his tea last night. That might be related.

Alhaitham obviously hadn’t intended for him to take it personally. His head had been completely
muddled after their encounter in the hallway, and he’d been thinking that the shower would give
him some clarity—except it didn’t. When he trudged out to the kitchen and Kaveh poured him a
cup of tea, his head was still a mess. Alhaitham couldn’t figure out how to act after coming undone
like that. It felt wrong to revert to their usual sniping, and at the same time, he didn’t know what
would be right…so he’d withdrawn to his room for some time to think.

Which hadn’t helped any more than the shower. What exactly was Alhaitham supposed to do,
though? Find Kaveh and demand that he make sense of Alhaitham’s sexual desires? Admit that
he’s completely out of his depth, and risk making Kaveh nervous about experimenting with him?
So Alhaitham stayed in his room, and didn’t even bring his cup out to the kitchen before going to
sleep.

(But he did wash it eventually, after Kaveh complained.)

Uncertainty prods at Alhaitham’s stomach. It’s the feeling he gets whenever he’s missing a key
piece of information and has to feign confidence as he proceeds—just like his plan to help save
Lesser Lord Kusanali, which had been a complete gamble despite his best strategizing.

Once the haze of hormones clears, will Kaveh be upset that he let Alhaitham finish on him like
that? Is he irritated that Alhaitham didn’t cooperate more? Had he even gotten any gratification
from what they just did?

Too many questions with undeterminable answers. Alhaitham feels the echo of Kaveh’s soft touch
on his hands, and tries to resummon the sensation in his mind—but it’s not the same as having
Kaveh actually touch him.

Needing a distraction, he picks up Kaveh’s small notebook and reads through the notes, one of
which is partially scratched out.

Restraining a partner – yes. Enjoyed making him beg. Voice kink? Edging good.
Dominating – YES. Humiliation – yes(???????)

Facial – strangely arousing but only because █ █ █ █ █

Nipple play – yes. Ask about nipple clamps. Seems to like a bit of pain, bodes well for
spanking. Also seems to like sense of ownership – somehow test with him as dom?

Alhaitham snorts. Kaveh definitely can’t deny his enthusiasm toward impact play. It’s almost
funny—except the image of Kaveh restraining Alhaitham and spanking him is by no means
humorous. That idea has a moan building in his lungs, and he shifts in place awkwardly, feeling his
cock pulse with interest.

At that moment, Kaveh returns to the room with damp bangs and a clean face, his cheeks pink
from washing. There’s a glass of water in his hand, and a strange relief floods Alhaitham’s chest at
the sight of him.

Eyebrows raised, Alhaitham holds up the notebook. “You seem to have come up with more
questions than answers.”

Kaveh’s eyes widen. “Hey!” He lunges across the room, sloshing water onto the floor, and snatches
the notebook from Alhaitham’s hand. “I didn’t say you could read that.”

“Won’t I find out anyway, if you’re planning to enact these things with me? I thought open
communication was important for sex.”

Kaveh pouts and hugs the notebook to his chest. “I—I would have told you, but you didn’t need to
read—ugh, whatever.” Deflating, he tosses the notebook onto the nightstand, then sits on the bed
beside Alhaitham. He holds out the glass of water and adds, “I don’t see why you’re surprised,
anyway. You should know that the process of discovery often involves more questions than
answers.”

That’s true—but the questions occupying Alhaitham’s mind don’t resemble the ones Kaveh wrote
down. They sit heavy on top of everything else, preventing him from organizing his thoughts.
Without thinking, Alhaitham combs his fingers through Kaveh’s bangs, checking for any traces of
fluid. His hand trails down Kaveh’s cheek, thumb stroking his chin…and then he realizes that he
doesn’t know what he’s doing. He doesn’t know why he did that.

Alhaitham abruptly pulls his hand away and accepts the glass of water, his heart thudding
uncomfortably.

“How—how do you feel?” Kaveh asks, resting a hand on Alhaitham’s thigh.

Alhaitham takes a sip of water to compose himself. “I’m good.”

“The restraints?”

“Good.”

“The, um…edging?”

Alhaitham takes a moment to consider, then says, “Good.”

“The…” Kaveh rubs his neck and glances away. “The domination? Dirty talk? Begging?”

“Yes,” Alhaitham says. As he thinks back over their encounter, though, he frowns. “Wait—me
begging?”

He knows that Kaveh had tried to make him beg, but he’d refused to say any of that. Instead,
he’d…

Wait.

Alhaitham’s face burns, and he nearly tries to hide behind the glass of water when he sees Kaveh’s
incredulous smile. “Oh, my gods,” Kaveh says, sounding horridly delighted. “You forgot that you
begged.”

“Urgh.”

“Well, you saw from my notes that I liked it, so there’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” Kaveh
reaches up and toys with a piece of Alhaitham’s hair. “Or, even if I didn’t like it, there’d still be no
shame. But, uh, I definitely liked it. Did you, though?”

The memory alone makes arousal curl hot around Alhaitham’s hips. After taking another sip of
water, he answers, “Yes.” Kaveh smiles at that, and Alhaitham squints at him. “What’s that look
for? Are you imagining something lascivious?”

“No, no.” Kaveh tilts his head to the side. “Well, I was thinking about how nicely you beg. But
right now, I’m just thinking that it’s nice to see you being so transparent for once.”

Transparent? Alhaitham is, at his core, a blunt person. He doesn’t mince words or spare feelings;
he speaks factually, not rhetorically. “Am I not usually straightforward?”

“Not with me, you aren’t. I can never tell if—never mind. Do you need to take any notes for
yourself?”

“I’ll worry about that later. Did we do anything you didn’t like?”

Kaveh shakes his head. “The opposite. I quite enjoyed all of that.”
“You wrote a lot of question marks after humiliation.”

“Oh.” Pressing his lips together, Kaveh looks away. “Ah, you see, I—in the past, I wasn’t
necessarily interested in embarrassing my partners, but…” He clears his throat. “With you, at least,
I apparently like being a bit mean.”

Alhaitham snorts. So Kaveh makes an exception when it comes to humiliating him—why is he not
surprised?

“What about you?” Kaveh asks.

“Do I like it when you’re a bit mean?” Alhaitham clarifies, and Kaveh nods. “I…would be open to
more of that, yes.”

“Mm. Then we’re on the same page.” Kaveh is silent for a moment, cracking his knuckles and
flexing his hands. “Perhaps you’ll consider this a stupid question—but you’re aware I wouldn’t
actually force you to do or say anything, right? If you used a safeword, I would have stopped
edging you.”

“You already reminded me of that while you were doing it.”

“Well, it bears repeating. I don’t ever want to do anything that makes you feel bad.”

That should go without saying, because although the two of them rarely get along, Alhaitham
would never expect Kaveh to inflict that sort of harm on him. It’s reassuring to hear, though, so
Alhaitham sees no reason pick apart Kaveh’s words. “Understood.”

Thinking about it, though, he realizes that he’d nearly forgotten about safewords until Kaveh
reminded him. Alhaitham really had felt completely trapped by Kaveh’s whims, left with no way
out. It hadn’t occurred to him that he still had control over his own pleasure.

He can’t think when it comes to Kaveh. He really can’t.

His eyes fall to Kaveh’s lap, where there’s an unmistakable sign of arousal. “You haven’t had a
chance to finish,” Alhaitham notes.

“Hm? To…” Kaveh follows Alhaitham’s gaze. “Oh. Well, I—it’s fine. I’ll take care of myself after
dinner. Aren’t you tired?”

Alhaitham is sated and relaxed, certainly—but he’s also been planning to get his mouth on Kaveh’s
dick ever since he woke up this morning. Even if he were exhausted, that prospect would rouse
him faster than ten cups of coffee. “I told you earlier that I intended to suck you off. Do you think
I’d fail to carry out my intentions?”

“N-no,” Kaveh says, though he looks a bit uncertain. Perhaps he really did think that Alhaitham
had no intention to follow through. “But, well—I’m a bit tired and hungry, so how about dinner
and a nap, first? And if you’re still in the mood after that, um…” He gestures awkwardly at his
groin. “All yours.”

“Hm.” Alhaitham feels his brows draw together, and tries to smooth his expression before Kaveh
can notice. “That’s fine. You go nap. I’ll start preparing dinner.”

Kaveh snorts. “Multitasking so that you can suck my dick sooner?”

“And if I am?”
“Oh, come on. You can’t be that eager to get my dick in your mouth.”

Alhaitham raises an eyebrow. “I’ve literally been waiting all day.” He stands and retrieves his
pants from the ground. “Go ahead and sleep. I’ll probably wake you in time for dinner.”

“You—probably! You’re not exactly incentivizing me to nap, you know.” Kaveh folds his arms
and glares as Alhaitham tugs his pants back on. “And what do you mean, literally? You’re always
on my case about how it doesn’t mean figuratively, but surely you haven’t literally spent your
whole day thinking about my cock—”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Alhaitham asks. “It’s a fascinating topic to study, Kaveh. After all, yours must
have unique properties, to come untouched so easily—”

Kaveh chucks Alhaitham’s discarded shirt at him, and it hits his face with alarming accuracy. “Out.
I’m taking a nap.”

Alhaitham peels the shirt away from his face. “Should I wake you up by sucking you off, or—”

“Out.”

“Not even giving me time to get dressed? How impersonal,” Alhaitham says. “In that case, I'll
leave this here."

He tosses his shirt back onto the bed, then turns and walks to the door while Kaveh splutters
behind him.

“What—no, I didn’t mean—you’re going to get another, right, you aren’t going to cook shirtless,
that would be—”

“Feel free to dream about my nice tits,” Alhaitham says, and then he pulls the door shut behind
him, cutting off Kaveh’s indignant response.

After dinner—during which Kaveh blatantly ogled Alhaitham’s chest, since he never actually
bothered to put a shirt back on—Kaveh sits quietly on the couch with a cup of tea, seemingly doing
nothing in particular. Alhaitham watches him from the living room doorway, trying to figure out if
the tea is meant to indicate disinterest.

Hadn’t Kaveh only said dinner and a nap? He hadn’t mentioned a cup of tea. He’s deviated from
the original plan, and Alhaitham doesn’t know what to make of that.

Kaveh had been interested this morning. Alhaitham is almost certain of that. He remembers the
way Kaveh gasped and squirmed when Alhaitham told him that he wanted to taste him, the way he
turned bright red and hissed out a curse.

Has Kaveh changed his mind, then? Alhaitham supposes he could ask, but he would probably
somehow manage to accidentally offend Kaveh with the question. Sometimes the most unlikely
things set him off—and if Alhaitham wants a chance at getting Kaveh’s dick in his mouth, then he
can’t risk aggravating him.

So instead, Alhaitham grabs a book and sits on one of the other couches, skimming the pages while
he waits for Kaveh to finish his tea. Every few minutes, he notices Kaveh’s eyes dart to his bare
torso, and he wonders if Kaveh is thinking about his discoveries earlier: that Alhaitham’s chest is
sensitive, that he’ll gasp if Kaveh sucks at it, that he likes a bit of pain.

Great. Now he’s thinking about that.

Alhaitham’s cheeks burn, and he holds his book a bit higher to cover his face.

Though, that does make him wonder: is Kaveh physically attracted to him?

It almost seems like an idiotic question, considering that Kaveh has agreed to sexually experiment
with Alhaitham and seems to be easily flustered by his advances. But it seems equally absurd that
Kaveh—Alhaitham’s ex-friend, now someone who can barely tolerate being in the same room as
him—would actively desire him in any way.

Of course, Kaveh had said those things about Alhaitham’s chest, but that was only meant to
embarrass him. And technically, Kaveh had spoken on behalf of others, not himself. Other people
wonder how Alhaitham looks with his shirt off. Other people want to suck on his chest. Alhaitham
doesn’t recall an actual admission of desire from Kaveh personally.

Does…does Kaveh actually like his chest? Alhaitham can’t tell. He knows that he theoretically has
a nice one, since he stays in good shape, but that doesn’t guarantee that Kaveh is attracted to it.

Damn it. Alhaitham is doing it again. He’s overanalyzing the wrong questions, overfocusing on
irrelevant things. What does it matter, if Kaveh likes his chest or not? Why does Kaveh need to be
attracted to him? Clearly the two of them will manage to test the kinks on that list regardless, if
their successful endeavor earlier was any indication.

And perhaps Kaveh simply prefers to be as efficient as possible. He’d been taking notes earlier—
maybe that’s to ensure that he doesn’t unnecessarily retread old ground. And he’s more
experienced than Alhaitham is, which means that he already knows how he likes to receive oral
sex. He might not see any reason to let Alhaitham suck him off.

Alhaitham resists the urge to bury his face against the book in his hands. None of that seems right.
That doesn’t sound anything like how Kaveh makes decisions. Besides, hadn’t Kaveh suggested
last night that he’d like to try everything both ways? That implies reciprocation.

He growls under his breath. Kaveh was embarrassingly right. Alhaitham really is that eager to get
his dick in his mouth.

“Is everything alright?” Kaveh asks, startling him.

“I’m fine,” Alhaitham says. “Are you enjoying your incredibly slow tea-drinking?”

Well. That came out more aggressive than he intended.

Kaveh immediately bristles. “Am I not allowed to enjoy a drink after dinner? I would have thought
you’d praise me for my choice of beverage. Would you prefer that I be draining an entire bottle of
wine?”

“No.” Alhaitham turns back to his book, his face now burning with something like shame. “Enjoy
the tea. Antioxidants are good for you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I suppose you don’t mean literally.”

“I mean it literally the way you’ve literally been waiting to suck my dick all day.”

“Hm. In that case, antioxidants reduce your risk for a variety of diseases. Red wine actually
contains them as well, but other sources include spinach, carrots, and—”

“Figuratively! I meant figuratively!” Kaveh says. “Why do you care how slowly I drink my tea?”

His brow isn’t pinched with irritation, though. It’s something more like anticipation. As if he’s
waiting for his opponent to roll their dice, nervously watching to see which sides face up.

It feels like another test—an attempt to make Alhaitham say things explicitly, like how Kaveh had
compelled him yesterday to admit that he jerked off to thoughts of him.

Why does Kaveh keep doing that? At first, Alhaitham thought that Kaveh was simply trying to
tease him, or that maybe he got off on hearing Alhaitham confess embarrassing truths. Now,
though, he gets the sense that there might be something more going on.

He’ll worry about it later. For now, if a confession is what stands between Alhaitham and his goal,
then he’ll happily oblige.

“Because,” Alhaitham says, lowering his book to his lap. “I literally—and I mean literally, Kaveh,
as in, words meant to be taken at face value—have been waiting to suck you off all day.” He snaps
the book shut and sets it aside, and Kaveh’s eyes widen in surprise. “I’m sitting on this couch with
a book when I should be on my knees with your cock in my mouth. Naturally, when you’ve been
sitting there for almost an hour sipping your tea—after originally saying that you only wanted
dinner and a nap—I’m beginning to feel frustrated.”

“Y-you—frustrated?” Kaveh echoes. “Over me?”

Alhaitham sighs. “How many other ways do I need to phrase it, Kaveh?”

“None! That—that way was…enough.” Kaveh runs a hand through his bangs, dislodging one of
the clips in his hair. “I just…you don’t have to, you know.”

“Yes,” Alhaitham says, “I am aware that I have no legal, moral, or social obligation to perform oral
sex on you.”

“What a passionate way of expressing your desires.”

“Why are you so insistent on making me speak unnecessarily, when we both know that I could be
using my mouth for something better right now?”

Kaveh’s face flushes, and he responds with a vague hum.

“Are you done with your tea?” Alhaitham asks.

For a moment, Kaveh stares at the cup on the coffee table, and Alhaitham almost wonders if he’s
going to dump the dregs and attempt to read them for an answer. “Yes.”

“Good.” Alhaitham sets aside his book and crosses to where Kaveh is seated, then lowers himself
to his knees in front of him. “I’ll—”

“Are you sure?” Kaveh asks, watching as Alhaitham removes his headphones. His hands are curled
into fists on his lap, and he sits with his legs pressed tightly together, staring down at Alhaitham
like he’s a scorpion with its tail arced. “Because, I mean, you…”

“Do you not want me to?” Alhaitham asks. He tentatively rests a hand on Kaveh’s knee, a
hairsbreadth from one of his clenched fists. “I’m asking seriously. You seem legitimately reluctant
to do this. I don’t want to do anything that will make you feel upset.”

“No, no, I want you to,” Kaveh says, leaning forward. One of his fists unfurls, and his fingertips
brush lightly against Alhaitham’s. “I just…have you ever actually…?”

Oh.

So that’s why he’s hesitating.

“You’re questioning my skills,” Alhaitham observes.

“Not your skills! Just—I’m concerned about your comfort, alright?”

“If I weren’t comfortable, would I be on my knees demanding that you let me do this?” Alhaitham
folds his arms on Kaveh’s legs and leans closer. “Do I need to beg nicely again?”

“Tempting,” Kaveh mutters.

“And if I have no experience,” Alhaitham says, “then doesn’t that mean that it’s even more
important for me to test this out, for the sake of our research?”

Kaveh’s teeth dig into his lip. His other hand is still balled in a fist. “I…but you…with me…”

“What about it? Would you feel uncomfortable being my first?”

“No, but—it doesn’t seem like I should…or, it’s just, that would…”

For once, Alhaitham can’t guess what’s going on in Kaveh’s mind. “Which answer would turn you
on more?” he asks, arching an eyebrow. “That I have experience, or that this is my first time?”

“What? I want the truth, you ass! I don’t want to go overboard if you’ve never done this before.”

“So you’re threatening to hold back if I’m inexperienced.” Well, that’s disappointing. Hadn’t
Kaveh promised the other night that he would wreck Alhaitham? It looks like he might not follow
through, after all. “You realize that could incentivize me to lie.”

“Don’t you dare,” Kaveh says. “If you lie to me even once while we’re doing this, I’m calling the
whole thing off.” He sighs heavily. “Anything you want to try, we can still try. I’m not going to
deny you the chance to experiment. But it would be useful information to have.”

Alhaitham personally fails to see how the information could be useful, or how it’s any of Kaveh’s
business—but if telling the truth will finally get Kaveh to put his dick in Alhaitham’s mouth, he’ll
comply. “Once.”

“Once?”

“I have given oral sex once.”

Kaveh’s eyes widen. “Wha—when?!”

Well, that information is definitely unnecessary. “Orientation week at the Akademiya,” Alhaitham
says. “I figured I should see what all the fuss was about.”
“Of course that was your reason.” Kaveh flexes his hands. “So, uh—I guess you must have liked it,
since you’re so intent on doing it now.”

“Not particularly,” Alhaitham says, enjoying how Kaveh’s brow furrows in confusion. “He wasn’t
anywhere near as attractive as you.” He slides his hands up Kaveh’s thighs until one of them
reaches the waistband of his pants, and then he smoothly flicks the button open. “If I’d known that
I’d eventually be here doing this, I wouldn’t have bothered with him.”

Kaveh’s hand lightly grasps Alhaitham’s wrist, halting his progress. “Wait, but—but what if you
don’t like it this time?”

Ridiculous. Can’t Kaveh try to be a bit rational, for once? He really thinks that Alhaitham will
dislike sucking the cock he’s been thinking about for days? “There’s a chance that I could dislike
any of the things we try,” Alhaitham points out. “Does that mean we shouldn’t attempt anything?”

“No, no. But…well, if you’ve done this before, then you already know what it’s like, right? So…”

“I see,” Alhaitham says, except he doesn’t. Because he still doesn’t know what it’s like to suck a
cock that he actively wants to suck. He doesn’t know what it’s like to taste Kaveh’s. “In that case,
let’s try a few more things on our list.”

“Oh, I—I didn’t mean…”

“Hairpulling,” Alhaitham decides. At this point, he has the list memorized, so it’s not difficult to
mentally sift through the terms. “And would you be comfortable speaking to me in a demeaning
manner? That is, attempting some sort of verbal humiliation. You seemed rather interested earlier.”

“Gods,” Kaveh breathes. “That—I—yes, I…I think I can do that.”

“You don’t have to.”

“No, I can,” Kaveh insists. “Usually I praise my partners, but I’m sure I can come up with
something. We’re supposed to be testing kinks, after all.” He gives Alhaitham a tentative smile,
one that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “And like you said, there’s a chance we’ll dislike some of
this. That’s…fine.”

He says the last word like a question, and Alhaitham squeezes his thigh reassuringly. “Perfectly
fine.”

A heavy exhale gusts from Kaveh’s lungs. “Alright. Then, in that case—if I say anything you don’t
like, or if you need to stop for any reason, our safewords still stand. But since your mouth will be
occupied…” He taps the back of Alhaitham’s hand. “Tap on my thigh three times. Do that now.”
Alhaitham gives three precise taps, and Kaveh nods. “Good. Either that or the safewords, then.”

Good. A strange sense of satisfaction warms Alhaitham’s chest. Very rarely does Kaveh call
anything he does good.

“I want you to be a bit rough,” Alhaitham adds.

“Dear gods,” Kaveh mutters. “Yes, alright. If you insist.” At that, Alhaitham reaches for the
waistband of his underwear, but Kaveh firmly pins his wrist to his thigh. “Not yet. I still need to
check something. When you say verbal humiliation or degradation, what exactly are you thinking?
Calling you a whore? Are you asking me to insult you a certain way?”

Alhaitham shrugs. “Whatever you want. Surprise me.” He doesn’t mind the unpredictability of sex
with Kaveh—in fact, he finds that it’s something he’s coming to crave.

“No,” Kaveh says, his voice surprisingly stern, and Alhaitham flinches. The sudden shift in tone
startles him…and it also makes a warm feeling of need curl in his stomach, as if he somehow likes
hearing Kaveh talk like that. “That’s completely irresponsible. Didn’t your book mention the
importance of explicit consent?”

“It said that partners should discuss verbal humiliation before attempting it,” Alhaitham says. “As
far as I can tell, we just discussed it.”

“Did we? Because I certainly wouldn’t like it if you called me a slut out of nowhere. I’d want to
negotiate that ahead of time.”

“Would you like that if we did negotiate it?” Alhaitham asks, curious.

“Hm.” Kaveh’s mouth twists. “Probably not, but…I’m not sure. It’s possible. With you, I—”
Suddenly, he presses his lips together and shakes his head. “Mm.”

Well, that supports Alhaitham’s hypothesis that Kaveh is more partial to a praise kink, anyway.
“The ideas you listed are fine,” Alhaitham says. “I’ll safeword if anything is bad, but I trust that
you can figure out what I’ll like.”

“No pressure,” Kaveh mumbles.

It’s not a challenge, though; Alhaitham genuinely means it. For better or worse, Kaveh knows him
more intimately than anyone else does. If there’s one person in Teyvat who can determine how
Alhaitham likes to be humiliated or degraded, it’s him.

“Can I start?” Alhaitham asks, and when Kaveh nods, he tugs Kaveh’s pants down enough to
reveal his underwear. Alhaitham rubs him through the fabric, watching as Kaveh’s cock responds
almost instantly. “Didn’t take much.”

Kaveh spreads his legs a bit wider and rests a hand lightly on the back of Alhaitham’s head. He
doesn’t push, yet—but Alhaitham wonders what would happen if he moved too slowly for Kaveh’s
liking. Would he actually be forceful? Or would he keep holding back, because he’s afraid to go
overboard?

Carefully, Alhaitham lowers Kaveh’s waistband and pulls his cock free.

For a moment, he can only stare. He hadn’t actually gotten a good look in the hallway last night—
and even if he had, it’s been literal years since Alhaitham’s face was this close to a dick. It’s an
unfamiliar feeling, to say the least.

Alhaitham gives Kaveh’s cock a few strokes and watches as it hardens completely, flushed and
stiff, curving slightly to the right. Kaveh takes shaky breaths above him, his fingers playing
delicately with Alhaitham’s hair. Alhaitham smooths his thumb over the tip, feeling his own cock
stir just at the thought of having it in his mouth.

“You know,” Kaveh says, “if you want, you can just do that. You don’t have to use your mouth,
really—”

“Is your idea of degradation to tell me that my services aren’t needed?” Alhaitham asks, glaring up
at him.

“Oh. Right.” Kaveh clears his throat, then gestures with his free hand as if to say please continue.
Alhaitham resists the urge to audibly sigh. He has a feeling that Kaveh won’t actually manage the
verbal humiliation part of this—but that’s fine, because Alhaitham is still getting what he wants
most.

Wetting his lips, he leans forward and takes the tip into his mouth, sucking lightly. Kaveh groans,
and his hand curls in Alhaitham’s hair, tugging gently at the strands.

His cock fills Alhaitham’s mouth far better than his fingers did. Alhaitham hums and slides his lips
farther down, taking as much as he can manage without gagging. (And if Alhaitham has made that
determination by conducting improper experiments with bananas and toys, well, Kaveh doesn’t
need to know that.)

“Th-that’s good, that’s far enough,” Kaveh says, with a shallow roll of his hips. Alhaitham keeps a
hand at the base of his cock, twisting and stroking what doesn’t fit in his mouth. “Tongue, use your
tongue.”

Alhaitham works his tongue along the underside of Kaveh’s cock, dragging his mouth toward the
tip. Then he licks lightly at the ridge just below the head, and Kaveh’s hips jerk at the touch. “Ah
—c-careful, I’m sensitive there.” His grip on Alhaitham’s hair tightens, putting pressure on his
scalp. “Take me in your mouth again. And let me hear you.”

Squinting, Alhaitham rounds his mouth and presses his tongue against his lower lip, trying to
produce a wet sound. He lets drool drip onto Kaveh’s cock and sucks messily, producing slick
sounds as he slides his mouth up and down.

“Oh, that—that’s good,” Kaveh says, breathily. “But I want to hear your voice.”

Alhaitham hums quietly as he sucks. He’s never been a vocal person; it feels odd to be any louder.

“Come on,” Kaveh says. “Louder.”

Alhaitham pulls off and loudly kisses up the side of Kaveh’s cock, the sounds obscene in his ears.
Surely that’s enough to satisfy him, if—

“Louder.” Kaveh yanks at Alhaitham’s hair, and pain radiates across his scalp. An involuntary
moan slips past his lips, little more than a breathy whimper. Kaveh’s grip doesn’t loosen.
“Alhaitham, I want to hear you.”

Alhaitham takes his cock back into his mouth and tries to moan around it. The sound is soft,
muffled—and it’s clearly not enough, because Kaveh pulls his hair again. The pain goes straight to
Alhaitham’s cock as pleasure, and he shudders.

“Now, Haitham,” Kaveh says, voice shaking slightly. “I know you don’t always use that voice
much, but…” He flattens his palm against Alhaitham’s head and shoves, nearly making him gag.
“Surely you can be louder than that, if you’re such a whore for my cock.”

Alhaitham inhales sharply, and a sweet heat pulses below his stomach.

A whore for my cock. His face burns. It’s embarrassing for Kaveh to realize how much Alhaitham
wants him, to point out the obvious—and then to say it like that, as if Alhaitham would do
anything for his cock, as if he wants it that badly.

He probably would. He probably does.

Alhaitham shivers and keeps sucking. He still can’t bring himself to moan any louder, but he trusts
that Kaveh can get him there.

“Oh, does that turn you on?” Kaveh asks. And it does, it does, but why does Kaveh have to sound
so pleased about it? The condescension makes frustration tug at Alhaitham’s chest—except it’s a
good kind of frustration, the kind that makes him sink deeper under. “Of course it does. You and
your love of words.” He pulls Alhaitham’s hair and thrusts into his mouth, just shy of choking him.
“You love when things are properly labelled and defined. Of course you’d like being called a
whore.”

Alhaitham takes shuddering breaths. Does he like being called a whore? He certainly likes the way
Kaveh says it, like he has Alhaitham completely figured out—as if it’s futile to argue, because
Kaveh reached the proper conclusion long ago.

Kaveh knows the truth: that Alhaitham is far too eager to have his cock in his mouth, that he’d
even beg for it if he had to.

Some unnamed feeling mounts in Alhaitham’s chest. He feels like he’ll either fracture or float, and
he doesn’t know which. All he knows is that he’s in Kaveh’s hands, that he’ll stay in Kaveh’s
hands, no matter what. If he floats away or falls apart, Kaveh has him.

“Oh,” Kaveh says, “but you always insist on precise definitions, don’t you. Because language is
variable and all, isn’t that right? So let me define what it means when I call you a whore,
Alhaitham, in case your head’s too full of cock to understand.”

He’s right. Alhaitham can’t think right now. He can only feel: Kaveh’s cock weighing on his
tongue, his own pressing painfully against his pants, Kaveh’s words making heat pulse through his
veins.

Kaveh cups Alhaitham’s face with both hands, then roughly runs his fingers back through his hair,
tangling and tugging at the strands. He tilts Alhaitham’s face to stare up at him, and Alhaitham
whimpers at the amused glint in Kaveh’s eyes.

“It means,” Kaveh says, “that you love having my cock in your mouth.” He smooths his thumb
along the corner of Alhaitham’s lips, smearing drool down his chin. “It means you’re desperate to
make me come. You’re dying to know how I taste.” He yanks painfully at Alhaitham’s hair, his
other hand delicately stroking his cheek. “And it means that you really did think about sucking me
off all day, because you’ve never wanted anything as much as you want my cock.”

The words hit Alhaitham with so much force that he nearly buckles. There’s a sound building in his
chest, squeezing his lungs—a sob, a scream, he doesn’t know. He’s floating away, and he’s under
Kaveh’s thumb, and he feels utterly exposed. He might as well be completely naked, the way
Kaveh’s words have stripped him down.

“Did you think I wouldn’t notice?” Kaveh asks, and Alhaitham gasps. “What a silly mistake,
Alhaitham. Of course I can tell that you’re a whore for my cock. I know you best, after all.”

Alhaitham squeezes his eyes shut in shame. It’s true, it’s completely true—Kaveh knows him best.
Kaveh knows what he wants, knows who he is, sees through him so clearly that Alhaitham can’t
stand it.

“Embarrassed?” Kaveh coos. He brushes Alhaitham’s bangs back from his face. “You shouldn’t
be. You really are quite smart, Alhaitham. Always such a fast learner. Look at you now—you’ve
already figured out that the best use of your mouth is sucking cock.”
It is, it is—except Alhaitham would only do this with Kaveh. He wouldn’t do this with anyone else.

He can’t correct Kaveh, though. He can’t say anything at all. He can only sit there with his mouth
full while Kaveh keeps talking.

“And I don’t think I need to tell you again what the best use of your voice is, do I?” Kaveh asks
sweetly. He tightens his grip on Alhaitham’s hair and tugs expectantly.

Alhaitham lets out a loud moan, his eyes locked onto Kaveh’s. He’s forgotten that he’s supposed to
be moving his mouth, simply kneeling there with his jaw slack—but it doesn’t matter, because
Kaveh starts thrusting his hips, doing the work for him.

“Good,” Kaveh says. “Again.”

Alhaitham moans a second time, so loudly that his face burns with embarrassment. He sounds
desperate, pathetic, like—

“Now you sound like a whore, too,” Kaveh says, and Alhaitham nearly topples over the edge from
those words.

He’s so close, even without touching himself. He might actually come from this.

“Are you going to come just from this?” Kaveh teases, and Alhaitham groans in protest. Kaveh
keeps doing that—picking him apart, exposing him, all while Alhaitham can barely form a
coherent thought. “By all means,” Kaveh says, prodding between Alhaitham’s legs with his foot,
“go ahead.” His toes nudge the bulge of Alhaitham’s cock. “I don’t care what your cock does, as
long as your mouth keeps doing its job.”

Alhaitham clings to Kaveh’s thighs, anchoring himself as Kaveh slides his cock in and out. He
doesn’t even bother touching himself. It’s all he can do to breathe through each thrust, to keep his
mouth open as Kaveh fucks it.

“The best definitions have visuals, don’t they?” Kaveh muses. “You’d be perfect for an illustration
of desperate.” Foolish, he’s saying utterly foolish things, but somehow every word flickers like
fire in Alhaitham’s gut. “Drool all over your face, flushed cheeks, eyes rolling back because my
cock feels so good.” His fingers comb through Alhaitham’s hair. “I think this is the best you’ve
ever looked, Alhaitham. It’s nice to see you so honest.”

Alhaitham’s jaw aches, and his throat tenses with the need to swallow. He pulls his mouth off,
ducking his head for a reprieve—but Kaveh’s firm hand instantly pushes his lips back onto his
cock. “Ah, ah,” he says, as Alhaitham’s throat tightens. “There you go. Back where you belong.”

Oh, oh. Kaveh’s stern grip, his refusal to let up, his lilting voice—it all pushes Alhaitham closer to
the edge. Then Kaveh’s foot starts rubbing up and down the outline of his cock, and Alhaitham lets
out a shuddering moan, his eyes fluttering shut.

“Don’t forget you have a safeword,” Kaveh says gently.

Alhaitham hums. He remembers: tap three times if…if he needs to. Or something.

But what would he need, besides this? This is what he’s wanted for days.

“Good.” Kaveh lightly pets his hair, and another shiver races down Alhaitham’s spine. “I—I’m
close. Where should I come, Alhaitham? Too many options. I’m sure you’re desperate for all of
them, but you’ll need to choose one. So, do you want to swallow? Do you want me to paint that
handsome face of yours? Cover your chest?”

All of it, any of it—Alhaitham just wants him to come. He bobs his head and flicks his tongue
against Kaveh’s cock, his lips wet with spit and precum.

“Alhaitham.” Kaveh tugs at his hair. “I asked you a question. Where should I come?”

Alhaitham doesn’t care. He bobs his head more insistently, focused on making Kaveh finish.

“Alhaitham.” Kaveh yanks hard at his hair, and Alhaitham moans. “That—that’s not an answer.
Can you…”

He’s keeps talking, but Alhaitham barely registers it. He devotes his attention to the cock in his
mouth, lets his mind sink into that heady feeling—

“Dendro core,” Kaveh says sharply.

Alhaitham’s eyes blink open. He pauses and slowly eases off Kaveh’s cock, looking up at him in
confusion. “Wh—”

“I’m not going to finish in your mouth or on your face without consent.” Kaveh grips Alhaitham’s
face with one hand, thumb digging into his cheek. His brows are drawn together, and there’s clear
concern in his eyes. “Understood?”

Alhaitham nods. He understands the words themselves, if not the reason for Kaveh’s question.

“Alright, then.” Kaveh’s fingertips trace from his temple to his jaw, then down to the sensitive skin
of his throat, his touch almost ticklish. “Where do you want me to come?”

“Mouth,” Alhaitham breathes.

“Thank you.” Grabbing a handful of Alhaitham’s hair, Kaveh presses his cock against his lips, and
Alhaitham opens his mouth to let it slide in. “There, just like that. I—I should have guessed that
you’d want to swallow, with how desperately you’ve been sucking. Isn’t that right?”

Alhaitham hums in response. He doesn’t particularly care what’s right or wrong—all that matters is
that his mouth is back where he wants it, and Kaveh doesn’t seem to be upset anymore.

“Fuck,” Kaveh hisses, as Alhaitham stares up at him and sucks. “You—you look so—” He presses
a hand to his mouth, his cheeks bright red. “I-I’m going to—oh, gods, Haitham—”

His cock twitches against Alhaitham’s tongue, and with an unrestrained moan, he spills down
Alhaitham’s throat.

Alhaitham swallows as much as possible before he can register the texture, then helplessly holds
the rest in his mouth. Kaveh’s moans and gasps fill his ears, and his foot presses down against
Alhaitham’s cock, maybe by accident—but that’s all it takes for Alhaitham to hurtle after him, his
body tensing and trembling as he comes.

Kaveh unexpectedly pulls out, and Alhaitham doubles over, the unswallowed remains dripping
from his mouth. He gasps and digs his nails into Kaveh’s legs, head fuzzy as his climax unties
each knot of tension in his body. Kaveh’s taunts echo in his mind—whore, desperate, I know you
best—and Alhaitham moans, tears pricking his eyes, nearly overwhelmed.
Warm hands cup his face, thumbing away the mess dribbling down his chin. Alhaitham closes his
eyes and takes deep breaths, trying to center himself as he comes back down.

“Are you alright?” Kaveh asks softly.

Alhaitham can’t quite bring himself to speak yet. He nods.

Sighing, Kaveh combs his fingers through Alhaitham’s bangs. “What am I going to do with you?”
he murmurs.

Hazily, Alhaitham cracks his eyes open. The first thing he notices is a whitish mess of drool on
Kaveh’s pants—and after a moment of confusion, he realizes that it’s the result of his failure to
swallow everything. “Sorry,” he says hoarsely.

“What? For what?” Kaveh glances down at his lap. “This? It’ll wash out. I—hold on.” He wiggles
out of his pants and kicks them aside, then tucks himself back into his underwear. Lightly grasping
Alhaitham’s bicep, he tugs him upward. “Come sit. No running off, do you hear me? You need
aftercare.”

The thought of leaving didn’t even occur to Alhaitham. He doesn’t know where he’d run to,
anyway. Everything feels blurry.

He slumps onto the couch next to Kaveh, grimacing at the stickiness around his crotch.

Ugh. Uncomfortable.

Kaveh wraps an arm around Alhaitham and pulls him closer so that they’re sitting side by side. His
hand gently guides Alhaitham’s head onto his shoulder, and Alhaitham doesn’t resist; he merely
settles against Kaveh and closes his eyes, breathing deeply.

Kaveh’s hair smells faintly of roses. It’s the shampoo he uses, the same since his Akademiya days.
Alhaitham usually isn’t close enough to detect the scent.

In fact, Alhaitham can’t even remember the last time Kaveh touched him this way. The weight of
his hand is comforting, and it makes Alhaitham wonder why it’s been so long since they sat quietly
like this, thighs brushing, wrapped up in their own world together.

Kaveh lightly strokes Alhaitham’s hair, his touch rhythmic, soothing. It’s almost enough to make
Alhaitham fall asleep, until the sound of Kaveh’s voice rouses him. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I should
have asked you about swallowing ahead of time.”

“Mm.” Alhaitham cracks his eyes open. “Didn’t need to.”

“Yes, I did,” Kaveh says, “but we’ll talk about that later. Are you alright? Do you need anything?
I’ll get you some water in a second.”

Water would be nice. There’s a salty, metallic taste lingering in Alhaitham’s mouth, and his tongue
curls from the memory of that texture—but he’d prefer for Kaveh to stay here. He doesn’t want
either one of them to move, just yet.

“I’m fine,” Alhaitham murmurs.

They sit in silence. It’s unusual, to be this close and not fight; normally one of them would have
offended the other by now. Instead, Kaveh simply pets Alhaitham’s hair without saying a word,
and Alhaitham struggles to stay awake.
“You know that I think you’re good for more than sucking dick, right?” Kaveh asks, after a while.

“Hm?” Belatedly, Alhaitham processes his words. “Tch. I certainly hope so.” Although he often
aggravates Kaveh, he’d like to believe that Kaveh could name one or two redeeming qualities of
his, in addition to capable of giving blowjobs.

“I—I actually think you’re smart, too.”

Alhaitham frowns. Why would he think that Kaveh considers him stupid? Even though their
philosophies clash—and even though they’ve forgotten how to make those philosophies fit
together—the two have always acknowledged each other’s ingenuity.

“And you can be an annoying pedant sometimes,” Kaveh adds, “but obviously I admire your
understanding of language. Linguistics is one of the few things I’ve actually seen you get
passionate about. I…I would never actually demean that, you know.”

His voice cracks a bit on the last word.

Alhaitham lifts his head to look up at Kaveh. “Are you alright?”

Kaveh glances down at him. “I—yes.” He takes a deep breath and exhales. “Yes. But I’d hate
myself if you actually thought that I meant any of the things I said earlier.” He strokes the spot
behind Alhaitham’s ear, sending a tingle across his skin. “And…and we aren’t exactly
complimentary with each other, usually. It just now occurred to me that for things like humiliation
or degradation, aftercare is meant to be a return to normalcy, but…”

He trails off, and Alhaitham waits for him to organize the rest of his thoughts.

“I mean,” Kaveh finally says, “how can I reassure you that I actually think good things about you,
if I normally never say those things?”

Oh. That hadn’t occurred to Alhaitham.

He’d assumed that if Kaveh demeaned him, then his own logic would reassure him afterwards.
After all, it would be absurd if Kaveh actually thought that the only good use of Alhaitham’s
mouth was sucking cock. Logically speaking, anything Kaveh said was only for the sake of the
scene.

But Kaveh has a point. Even if Alhaitham knows that those humiliating words were false, there
aren’t any true words of praise underneath them—or, if there are, those words are old and faded,
the illegible remnants of a friendship from years ago. Alhaitham can tell himself that Kaveh
doesn’t think demeaning things about him, and erase those from the record…but if he does that,
then all that’s left is a blank page, devoid of insults or praise.

“I see,” Alhaitham murmurs.

“So, don’t—don’t laugh at me for saying this,” Kaveh says, looking away, “but I think you’re
smart, and I think you do a lot of good for others despite your bizarre worldview, and I actually
enjoy hearing you talk about linguistics, except when you nitpick things like my usage of the word
literally.” His fingers keep playing with Alhaitham’s hair, even as he avoids looking him in the
eye. “Just because I enjoyed what we did just now, that doesn’t mean I’d ever actually delight in
insulting you like that.”

Alhaitham isn’t sure how to respond to that. The candid praise sits conspicuously in his mind, out
of place alongside all of the bickering and sniping that he’s grown used to. “I understand.” Kaveh
hums, and Alhaitham can’t help but ask, “So you liked that.”

“Yes,” Kaveh mutters. “It was incredibly attractive. You were…” He seems to fumble for words.
“Entrancing. I didn’t think I’d last as long as I did.”

That compliment, at least, Alhaitham knows how to handle. A smug sense of satisfaction washes
over him, and he adds that comment to his mental library of ways to tease Kaveh.

Kaveh’s eyes flick down to him. “Oh, I know that look. Ugh, don’t act so pleased with yourself.”
His arm disappears from Alhaitham’s shoulders, and Alhaitham instinctively sits upright. “I’ll go
get us some water and a snack. Stay here.”

He leaves for the kitchen, and Alhaitham instantly feels cold without Kaveh’s body beside his.

And he feels…sticky, still.

Ugh. It’s even worse now. Alhaitham would go back to his bedroom to change his pants, except he
doesn’t want Kaveh to come back to an empty couch.

So what if he does? Alhaitham’s rationality urges. You’d be back a few seconds later. If he’s
annoyed or upset, that’s his problem.

But instead Alhaitham folds his arms and waits, silently cringing at the dampness around his
crotch.

A few moments later, Kaveh comes back with a small tray holding two glasses of water and a plate
of what appears to be nan-e nokhodchi. (Alhaitham now recalls that Kaveh bought a box of those
shortbread cookies at a stall the other day, and somehow managed not to eat the entire container
the moment they got home. Perhaps he’d been saving some of them for this.)

Alhaitham shifts uncomfortably and plucks at his pants, trying to adjust the fabric so that it’s less
unpleasant. Kaveh’s gaze follows the movement, and his eyes widen in realization. “Wait, you—
oh. Hold on.” He sets the tray on the coffee table, then disappears into the hallway again.

When Kaveh returns, he’s carrying a washcloth and a pair of pajama pants that seem to have been
retrieved from Alhaitham’s dresser. And while Alhaitham might normally criticize him for going
into his room like that, privacy is currently the furthest thing from his mind; the only thing that
matters right now is that he can finally change into clean clothes.

“You can take those off,” Kaveh says, setting the pants on the couch next to Alhaitham.

Alhaitham doesn’t require further instruction. He stands and swiftly shucks his pants and
underwear, not even caring that it leaves him completely naked, and then he reaches for the
washcloth.

“I’ll get it,” Kaveh says. He perches on the couch and dabs the warm cloth around Alhaitham’s
legs, wiping away the traces of stickiness. Alhaitham doesn’t protest, although he admittedly finds
Kaveh’s assistance somewhat baffling. There’s nothing particularly alluring about scrubbing his
thighs and flaccid cock clean. “Sorry. I didn’t realize you had been sitting there with…” He waves
his hand vaguely, then tosses the cloth onto the pile of discarded pants. “Let’s get some water and
sugar in our systems.”

Alhaitham pulls on the pajama pants and sits back on the couch, grabbing a glass of water and a
cookie. As he sips at his drink, Kaveh settles onto the seat next to him, close enough that their
thighs graze.
“You wanted to discuss the safeword,” Alhaitham remembers. He takes a bite of his cookie and
hums as the sweet cardamom flavor melts on his tongue. He’s usually not too partial to sweets, but
right now, the sugar feels needed.

“Right.” Kaveh nibbles at one of the cookies, his fingers drumming against his thigh. “I should
have clarified ahead of time how we wanted things to end, so that you weren’t put on the spot like
that.”

“Hm.” Alhaitham brushes a few crumbs off his lap, which prompts an exasperated sigh from
Kaveh. “You didn’t need to stop.”

“Yes, I did,” Kaveh says, waving his cookie at Alhaitham. As he does, some of its pistachio
garnish flakes onto the carpet, joining Alhaitham’s crumbs. “If I had finished in your mouth
without asking, we might have fortuitously been on the same page that time—but what about other
things? What if we’d agreed to incorporate some pain, and I slapped you in the face when you’d
only expected me to hit your legs and ass? At best, you wouldn’t be expecting it, and at worst, you
wouldn’t want it.”

He pinches the cookie a bit too hard between his fingers, and a piece crumbles onto the cushion.
Alhaitham stares at the fallen crumb, his face burning with chagrin.

“I can’t infer consent like that,” Kaveh says, “and I absolutely refuse to risk non-consent. I know
you like to be stubborn and stoic, Haitham, and I know you love to drive me insane—but you can’t
put me in that sort of situation.” He stares at Alhaitham with wide eyes, his gaze pleading. “I’m
literally, literally begging you not to do that to me. Please. I need to know that you’ll safeword
when you need to, and I need to trust that you won’t set me up to cross your boundaries.”

His shoulders slump, and he stuffs the remainder of his cookie in his mouth, looking utterly
dejected.

Alhaitham stares helplessly at him. That…makes a surprising amount of sense. If Alhaitham

doesn’t consistently consent, then Kaveh can’t trust that he’ll safeword when he’s reluctant about
something. That insecurity will color all of their future encounters, which will make it difficult for
them to enjoy themselves.

And although it’s often an exercise in futility, Alhaitham tries to imagine things from Kaveh’s
perspective. What if Alhaitham were the one to do something Kaveh didn’t like, because Kaveh’s
behavior had led him to assume consent? What if Alhaitham had finished on Kaveh’s face earlier
because he didn’t necessarily say no, only to find out afterward that Kaveh found the act
distressing?

Alhaitham’s chest hurts at the thought, as if a serpent is sinking its fangs into his heart. He and
Kaveh have their squabbles, and they sometimes exchange hurtful words—but Alhaitham would
never want to inflict that kind of pain on him.

And Kaveh has always been more prone to guilt than the average person. If he accidentally did
something without Alhaitham’s consent, he’d tear himself apart for weeks, months, maybe even
years.

Kaveh is terrified of ending up in that position—and Alhaitham had threatened him with that
terrifying possibility when he didn’t offer his clear consent.

A horrible feeling squeezes his throat, stopping his words. He can’t shrug this off like he does
when Kaveh complains about ugly furniture or gets upset about Alhaitham’s attitude. Alhaitham
made Kaveh feel insecure in a moment of vulnerability, and despite the emotional distance he tries
to maintain, Alhaitham does care about Kaveh’s feelings.

Maybe not always. Maybe not often enough. But he cares now, sitting here while Kaveh looks like
he’s trying not to add tears to the crumbs on the floor.

Alhaitham is not a man prone to issuing apologies, and it especially rankles him to admit that he
miscalculated. Still, something needs to be said. He can’t leave Kaveh like this.

He sets down his half-eaten cookie and glass, and Kaveh startles at the sound. “I think,” Alhaitham
says, slowly, “that you need aftercare, too, Kaveh.”

Kaveh stares at him uncomprehendingly, crumbs clinging to his worried lips. “I—no, I’ve gotten
enough, and…and that’s what we’re doing, still, with—with the water, and…” His voice shakes a
bit, and he wrenches his head to look away.

“Aftercare is different for everyone,” Alhaitham says, recalling a line from the book. He lightly
rests a hand on Kaveh’s thigh. “You might need something different.”

“What I need,” Kaveh says shakily, “is for you to promise that you won’t put me in that position
ever again.”

“I promise I won’t.” When Kaveh looks at him disbelievingly, Alhaitham repeats, “Kaveh, I
promise I will never put you in a position where you feel that way. And I’m sorry I didn’t answer
your question earlier. You were right to stop and ask.”

“You—you’re—” Kaveh drags a hand down his face, a hysterical laugh slipping past his fingers.
“You’re sorry, and I’m right? Did that orgasm rearrange your brain patterns, or something?” He
buries his face in both his hands, his shoulders shaking with an incomprehensible sound. “You
aren’t real. You can’t be real.”

“Well, someone certainly ate half of that cookie on the coffee table, and it wasn’t you.”

Kaveh peeks through the cracks between his fingers. “What—you—urgh, don’t joke about this—”

“I was serious about the topic that required sobriety,” Alhaitham says. “I see no reason to refrain
from humor in other matters.”

Kaveh sighs, his breath hitching like a sob. “You…” He twists toward Alhaitham and presses his
face to Alhaitham’s shoulder. “I’m taking you up on that aftercare.”

With stiff movements, Alhaitham loops an arm over Kaveh’s shoulders and runs his fingers across
his hair. Kaveh gradually relaxes against him, until he’s so limp that Alhaitham wonders if he’s
fallen asleep.

After a while, Kaveh grumbles, “I can’t believe I had to explain all of that to you. Aren’t you
always saying more time on contemplation?” He pokes Alhaitham’s thigh. “What, was my dick so
good that you forgot how to think?”

Alhaitham presses his lips together, glad that Kaveh can’t see the flush on his face. Because,
well…basically, yes, although Alhaitham certainly wouldn’t put it in those terms.

“How did all of that feel?” Kaveh asks. “The kinks we tried, I mean.”

“Was my orgasm not answer enough?”

“No, it wasn’t. That’s not how it works, you blockhead, and you know it.” Kaveh huffs. “I know I
said that you have a smart head on your shoulders, but that brain of yours can’t help you if you
only think with your dick.”

“I suppose my dick is more interested in execution than in contemplation, but I believe that’s rather
standard for appendages of its kind.”

Kaveh hums. “Oh, there’s nothing standard about your—no, never mind. You’re right, your dick is
a plain, boring, average one. Don’t let it get as egotistical as its owner.” His index finger starts
drawing circles and shapes on Alhaitham’s thigh, the movements almost hypnotic. “Did I go too
far with anything? How did you feel about being called a whore? Or the rest of what I said?”

This time, Alhaitham does in fact contemplate—because he doesn’t intend to share the first answer
that surfaces in his mind, which is Your dirty talk is so ridiculously effective that I could probably
come untouched just from hearing you say those things.

“Surprisingly effective,” Alhaitham finally says. “While the word on its own doesn’t hold any
personal significance for me, it’s still a derogatory one, which sets the tone of communication—
and that context means that your other comments carry a similar connotation of degradation.

“That said, the content of the comments still matters. Generally speaking, your approach seemed to
consist of backhanded praise, which is apparently effective on me. For example, you praised my
intelligence, but specifically in the context of my decision to debase myself. Seeing my good
qualities twisted in that way essentially recontextualizes how I understand them, which in turn
lowers my opinion of myself and humiliates me.

“Tone is also important. You spoke with a balance of affection and derision, which made you seem
like you were in control and reinforced your dominant position. Overall, those elements combined
in a way that made your speech degrading and instilled a feeling of humiliation in me.”

“Oh, my gods,” Kaveh mutters.

“So, in conclusion,” Alhaitham says, “yes, it worked.”

“It worked,” Kaveh says, “but did you like it? Archons, Alhaitham, you gave me a whole fucking
linguistics essay and still didn’t answer my question.”

“Oh.” Alhaitham blinks and stares at his abandoned glass of water on the coffee table—which he
would retrieve, except leaning forward to grab it would disturb Kaveh. “That. Yes.”

Kaveh snickers. “I only needed to hear yes, I like verbal humiliation, and I got an entire thesis.
Maybe you should try putting this sort of effort toward your actual job, sometime.”

“Hmph. You’re overgeneralizing. I stated that I liked your verbal humiliation, but that doesn’t
mean I would enjoy someone else’s approach.”

In all honesty, Alhaitham can’t see himself enjoying anyone else’s approach—or, really, he can’t
even imagine himself doing any of this with someone who isn’t Kaveh.

And that’s because Kaveh is familiar to him. The reason is purely logical.

“Well, I’m glad to see I managed to deliver,” Kaveh says. “I was a little concerned when you first
requested the humiliation, you know. You seemed to have rather high expectations of me.”

Of course. That’s because Alhaitham does have high expectations of Kaveh. Despite Kaveh’s
 oversentimentality, he’s an intelligent and capable person. Alhaitham isn’t worried about Kaveh’s
ability to deliver, and never has been; if he did have such concerns, he wouldn’t have agreed to this
arrangement in the first place.

“My expectations of you are perfectly reasonable,” Alhaitham says.

“Says one of the most unreasonable people I know.”

“Hm.” Alhaitham tugs lightly at a strand of Kaveh’s hair. “Weren’t you the one who worried that a
single cup of coffee would embitter the taste of his semen?”

“Wh—you!” Kaveh squawks and abruptly sits up, turning to scowl at Alhaitham. “I knew it! I
knew you’d bring that up again. You always—hrgh!” He grabs another cookie and bites off half of
it, chewing aggressively.

“It doesn’t taste much different from mine,” Alhaitham says. “I suppose that makes sense, since we
mostly eat similar meals—”

As expected, the teasing sets off a round of indignant ranting from Kaveh—and with normalcy
restored, Alhaitham finally reaches for his glass of water.

Chapter End Notes

*Verbal humiliation: During the second blowjob, Kaveh mostly taunts Alhaitham for
being so eager to suck him off, but he also uses the word “whore” (spoken out loud 5
times during the actual scene).

*Safeword: Kaveh uses their “yellow” safeword during the second blowjob (when
Alhaitham is giving oral sex). When Kaveh asks Alhaitham if he wants to swallow,
Alhaitham doesn’t answer the question, which causes Kaveh to safeword so that he
can obtain proper consent.

Additional note about the coffee: Alhaitham is preparing it in the style of Turkish
coffee, since that seems to be what the game based Sumeru’s coffeemaking on. And if
you’re adding sugar to Turkish coffee, you add it when the water is heating, not
afterwards—so that’s why Alhaitham made a new cup of coffee instead of just giving
Kaveh the jar of sugar.

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