Dave Transcripts

×
FAQ

Memberships

Contact us
Facebook Twitter Tumblr
Board indexTV ShowsDDave
03x06 - #RIPLilDicky

Series stars a fictionalized version of Lil Dicky, a suburban neurotic man in

his late twenties who has convinced himself that he's destined to be one
of the best rappers of all time.
1 post • Page 1 of 1

03x06 - #RIPLilDicky
Post 05/07/23 06:16

DAVE: I've never been on tour before,

so, you know, I didn't

even know what to expect,

but I imagined it would feel like...

freedom, you know?

Like, freedom from having

to create every day.

Freedom from being a

prisoner of my own ambition.

And I could just have

one task every night:

perform my music.

But it's a lot different

making these songs,
like, in my studio by myself.

I mean, every night I'm out

there and I really do, like,

face the music, you know?

I'm seeing the crowd.

And I love my fans, I really do,

but some of them are ruining

it for the rest of them,

because we're at a time right now

where our country is,

like, eating itself alive,

and I'm up there making jokes

that I don't even know

if I find funny anymore.

A-And, like, on top

of that, every moment

I'm, like, being filmed and scrutinized,

and, like, if I say

the wrong thing onstage

or do the wrong thing, who

knows what would happen?

A-And I thought this tour

was gonna be, like, me living,

but it really just

feels like I'm surviving.

I need to rebrand
'cause I'm breaking down.
(SIGHS) I just can't do it anymore.

So what are you saying?

He's saying he wants to

cancel the rest of the tour.

Yeah.

(DAVE SIGHS)

We'll be okay.

Think about Lincoln.

Everything that he went through.

Stay strong mentally.

'Cause we're gonna get

through this as a unit.

Honestly, I just don't even

know what this doc is anymore.

Like, it feels half-baked

if we're stopping now.

Look, life isn't all

about content, okay?

Everything is content, dawg.

No, Gata, not everything is content.

I am not content.

I'm not content.

(SIGHS) How does Jack Harlow...

How does this guy's

followers go up like this?
- EMMA: Comparison is the thief of joy.
- (PHONE CHIMES)

DAVE: None of those f*cking

phrasings today, okay? Those idioms?

They're ill-kempt. Do I need

to wear this mic anymore,

- now that you're not interested in...

-_

- EMMA: Who cares?

- GATA: Come on, man.

Okay. : , Dave.
Let's go. We got to go.

- We got to get ready for this call.

- The call's at : . I need the two minutes.

No, 'cause I need to connect

to the Wi-Fi because there's

no signal out here, Dave.

- Wi-Fi connects instantaneously.

- So we need to be prepared.

- 'Cause they're gonna call any minute now.

- Look, just let me gather

- my whole...
- I know you want to cancel your tour

for your mental health,

and I'm here for you, okay?

Bieber did it last year.

It's not that big of a deal.

It's okay. I love you, all right?

- I'm doing this with you.
- I know.

I love you, too, I just

feel so bad for all my fans

- that bought tickets. I love my fans.

- You can't feel bad for the fans.

They're gonna get a full refund.

Plus, your fans would rather

- have you happy and healthy.

- (PHONE RINGING)

- I would hope so.

- And look.

- And look. What did I say?

- They're calling.

- And they're early. You're...

- That's why I do what I do.

- You're buttoned up. Hey.

- Yo! You got Mike and Dave.

- Both.
- KEITH (OVER PHONE): Yeah, it's Keith.

Oh, Keith. The big dog.

What do we owe this

pleasure to you... uh...

- What's up?
- Hi.

Yeah, shut the f*ck up.

What you idiots are

proposing is outlandish.
Dave here. (CHUCKLES)

So, look, I just want you

to know that I really put

a lot of thought into this

decision to cancel the tour.

It's not one I took lightly.

I don't know if you watch

CNN these days, but, like...

the nation is so divided right now.

- Pretty toxic.
- Yeah.

Again, shut the f*ck

up and listen to me.

You have been a thorn

in this label's side

- since we signed you.

- Yeah.

- "Jail"?
- That's a good song still.

The sh*t in Korea?

Let's just keep this conversation

purely domestic, if possible.

If we start talking
international issues,

- we're just gonna be talking for hours.

- Yeah. It's dirty.

You refused to promote

your album at the VMAs.
You did a song with
Gator? f*cking Gator?

- It's Gata.
- Yeah, it's... Whoa!

- Whoa! Whoa!
- (METAL SCREECHING)

Sorry, folks. Engine's

being frisky, okay?

KEITH: Am I on
speakerphone? Take me off.

MIKE: No. Uh, sorry about that, Keith.

Let me... Hold on, let me

talk to you outside, Keith.

This is the most mismanaged

operation I've ever seen.

You've recouped about grand

out of a $ , advance, leaving...

-$,.
- Right.

And you've breached contract

more than enough times,

so you will be hearing from our lawyers.

Whoa. You're gonna get litigious?

Yes, and to put it even more simply,

we just don't believe in

this Lil Dicky sh*t anymore.

(LAUGHS): Okay.
That is... that hurts. But...

Look, I understand that, like,

the Lil Dicky thing

hasn't really popped off

the way that we all would

have imagined it would,

but I have a whole plan to rebrand.

Mike, take me off speakerphone now.

Hey, Keith. Yeah, okay,

- l-look, let us come back with a plan...

- I can't hear.

- ... to show you that this can be way more...

- I can't hear.

... cost-efficient. Okay?

I am going to take care of this.

I can prove to you

this is a-a well-run machine, you know?

Let-let me show you that we

can get our sh*t together here.

I promise you, even if it

seems bad now, it's not...

Holy sh*t!

(SOFTLY): What the f*ck?

- What the f*ck?

- Cliff.
What in the f*ck?!

- Cliff!
- Cliff! Cliff!

Get away from the bus,

Dave! Get away from the bus!

Dave! Dave, get over here!

Get him away from the bus!

Oh, man, it was the rats.

The rats, the wires down

in the undercarriage.

What the f*ck are you

talking about, bro?

We could have f*cking died.

- All my sh*t is on there, bro!

- (SCREAMS)

- We're alive. We're alive.

- You better ask somebody about me...

- My f*cking laptop!
- My God, we are so lucky.

How much does a f*cking bus cost?

- (MOANS)
- I ain't worrying about that sh*t.

We could have died. Like...

f*ck all this Lil Dicky f*cking sh*t.

Man, this some real Bad

Boys sh*t right here.

I'm about to get this on the Story.

IG, look...

f*ck. Ain't no g*dd*mn service.

♪♪

MIKE: There's still no

cell service out here.

Damn, I f*cking left my meds on the bus.

My Adderall was on that bus, too.

I didn't take my Adderall today, so...

CLIFF: This is all y'all's fault.

Y'all left the food that

draw the rats to the food

that caused the expl*si*n.

ELZ: Cliff, if you don't

hurry the f*ck up...

Gata, we have to save that.

Are we really in that type of situation?

- Yes.
- (SCOFFS)

I'm trying to cool down, man.

It's hot as a m*therf*cker out here.

(BIRDS SQUAWKING)

Who's Lil Dicky?

MAN: I don't know.

But R. I. P., Lil Dicky.

Wait.

What?

Whoa.

- I'm gonna sit in that booth.

- (EMMA SIGHING)

Oh, my God. Got food.

Ugh. I need to wash my hands.

- I'm so dirty.
- EMMA: Oh. (SIGHS)

Finally, Wi-Fi.

- (GROANING)
- Oh, you got the Wi-Fi?

I don't know how the Jews...

did all the f*cking

traveling and the wandering.

Hey, will you share

the password, please?

GATA: I just shared it with you, Mike.

You need to get me water 'cause

I've never been more thirsty.

- (PHONES CHIMING)
- Yo. What the f*ck?

- Wait. Are you guys seeing this?

- Nah, nah.

WAITER: What drinks can I get you guys?

- Just give us a minute, please.

- GATA: I mean, bro...
- DAVE: What's going on?
- ... this sh*t ain't cool, man.

- EMMA: This is insane.

- Is it another mass sh**ting?

Dude, dude, dude, dude,

dude, dude, dude, dude, dude.

Everyone thinks you're dead.

- Thinks I'm what?

- Dead.

I'm getting "Sorry for your loss" texts,

I'm getting calls. I

have unanswered texts

that are just like, "Yo, sorry, bro,

didn't know what was going

on, bro." Like, what the f*ck?

MAN (OVER VIDEO): R. I. P., Lil Dicky.

DAVE: That's my sex doll legs.

How many Instagram followers

did you have this morning?

Uh... Wait, I don't keep track.

Like , or something?

Well, you've got . million now.

No, I don't.

. million in, like, three hours?

ELZ: Everybody thinks you're dead.

It's the number one trending
topic on Twitter, bro.

- ELZ: My mom has texted me, bro.

- That's crazy, man.

- ELZ: I don't know what the f*ck to do.

- DAVE: Oh, my God. #RIPLilDicky?

Holy sh*t. This is

exactly the story I needed.

Okay, I need the Wi-Fi right now.

- Someone give me the Wi-Fi.

- ELZ: Okay, yeah. I need to...

Dave, can I talk to you

outside for a second?

Yeah, give me a second, I just

want to see what's going on...

EMMA: What are you...

what are you doing?

- No.
- Talk outside, just for two seconds.

- What are you doing? Stop messing...

- Real fast.

Outside. Outside. Real fast.

Outside, outside, outside.

- Give me my phone right now.

- Just one minute. Please.

- Give me my phone.
- GATA: Mike, you always tripping, man.

I'll go.

Hey, can I have my phone back

so I can tweet to the world

- that I'm not dead, please?

- Yeah, yes, yes, we can do that.

- We can do that.
- Yeah. Thank you.

Or we don't...

- we don't at all.
- What?

Just-just for a short amount of

time, a little period of time,

- we do nothing.
- I don't understand.

I'm not gonna let people think I'm dead.

My mom thinks I'm dead.

- My... Give me the phone.

- Listen. No, no, no, Dave.

- I have to call my parents, man.

- Shh...

- My mom thinks I'm dead.

- Listen. Listen.

Listen to me for two seconds, please.

Okay, just... Your

streams are up. Way up.

- Give me my phone.
- And I'm talking so way up

that we could recoup

the label's losses...

all of them... in one day.

- One day?
- I did the math. One day.

This could fix our entire situation.

If we just play into this

little misunderstanding

just a little bit, you know, and...

We can't do this, man.

- Elz. Think about Elz.

- We're not doing this.

I mean, he's got pub

on most of those songs.

He produced almost the whole thing.

He's broke as sh*t.

GATA: Trending right now.

On Twitter. Everywhere.

ELZ: That's crazy.

Or Gata? Gata's streams...

through the roof.

- It's absurd, what's happening right now.

- Okay, they're not...

Even Emma, the documentary, it's like

- think about the eyes that gets.

- It's #RIPLilDicky that's trending.

That's my name, okay?

I'm gonna deal with the fallout.

It's already f*cking trending, dude.

The Internet has it, it's gone.

It-it exists, Dave. You know?

And at some point, you're

gonna come forward and go,

"Hey, I'm not dead, obviously."

- That's gonna be weird, and that's gonna be...

- No. Because

you didn't control the

narrative in the first place.

You're just saying, "Hey,

I'm not dead, you guys."

And what's the difference

in doing that right now

or tomorrow morning?

It's like...

Man...

Y-You're playing with

fire here doing this.

Why? We didn't do anything.

Let's do nothing.

I really wish I was on

my Adderall right now.

This is the first time in ten years

that I haven't been on my

Adderall. My brain is not able to

- f*cking process this sh*t.

- There's a lot of money coming in.
Let me process it, okay?
That's what I'm here to do.

Do I even want more attention on...?

I mean, this is the same music

that I just canceled my tour for,

because I was so ashamed by it.

Why do I want more eyes on that?

I need to do a whole rebrand.

Oh, what... What's a better rebrand than

coming back from the dead?

This could be huge.

Massive. We just let it

drag out a little bit longer.

- Uh-huh.
- Yes.

I don't, I don't even

have to check Twitter.

Why did I... I didn't have to know...

- I don't even have to know about this.

- No.

I don't know.

Look, I've...

I got to tweet that I'm alive.

I have to tweet that I'm

alive. Give me my phone.
- I understand.
- Hold on. Hold on.

Got to figure out what I'm gonna tweet.

"LeBron..."

- LeBron.
- LeBron follows me?

LeBron Raymone James follows you.

Oh, it's not the real LeBron?

What? Yes, no.

- His middle name is Raymone?

- No... Yes, yes!

- That's LeBron James. Yeah.

- This is LeBron?

(CRYING SOFTLY)

It's okay, buddy.

I know, I know.

I know. This is a big moment.

(DAVE WHIMPERS)

- I know.
- It's like...

- I worked so hard.
- You did.

And LeBron Raymone

James recognized that.

Okay?

But think about this, dude.

I mean, who's next now?

- Drake? It's like...

- Oh, man.

- Oh, my God.
- (EXHALES)

This is f*cking...

So, we're gonna...

- One night.
- One night.

Tomorrow morning we're gonna

say that the bus blew up,

we had no service, we were

wandering around the desert...

- That's exactly what happened.

- We had no idea this was happening.

- Not an idea.
- By the time we arrived at service,

we found everything out.

And the second we have

to tell a lie, I'm out.

I don't see any lies. Do you?

- No.
- No. Good. Okay.

We should get out of

here. I'll get everybody.

'Cause, you know, we got to just move.

We can't... We shouldn't be here?

Yeah, we should move. We should move.

- We should move.
- Okay.

We're alive, Dave!

LeBron Raymone James!

DAVE: I'm alive.

♪♪

- MIKE: You guys, we got to go. Come on.

- Fine.

- Let's go, please.

- CLIFF: Have to eat.

- EMMA: So annoying.
- Come on. Thank you. Thank you, thank you.

- Thank you.
- GATA: Man, let me get my phone, man.

(DOOR CLOSES)

Hi, honey.

Mom, ugh, I'm so happy you picked up.

Look, everything is
fine, we're all okay.

I'm not dead, there's

nothing to be concerned about.

Hang-hang on a second.

Your father just dropped

potatoes, I couldn't hear you.

- I just dropped one potato.

- What...
The... Have you guys not been
on your phone all day today?

No, we were playing bridge

all morning. What's going on?

It's a very complicated situation,

so just don't ask all

your usual questions,

but, essentially, the bus blew up...

Oh, my God.

- Just listen, please.

- What happened?

I... Shh, I can't hear.

Everyone is okay,
but there's this, like,

Internet rumor going

around that I'm dead.

- Who's dead?
- What? What happened?

Did somebody commit suicide?

Look, I'm gonna make things very simple.

Listen to these instructions:

don't go on your phone all day,

don't talk to anybody, just

sit at home and do nothing.

Can you please do that for me?

No, wait, we're having dinner

with the Mendelsons tonight.
No. Cancel. You have to cancel.

It's hard to reschedule

with the Mendelsons.

They live in Conshohocken.

What, we have to reschedule

with the Mendelsons?

I don't care, there's,

like, bigger things at stake.

I will explain everything in

more detail later. I have to go.

- I love you both. Drive safe. See you soon.

- CAROL: Okay. I don't understand,

- but I never do.

- Love you both, drive safe.

- See you soon. Bye.

- Okay, I love you...

Mike, you call your dad, bro?

- Um...
- ELZ: I just had

the strangest phone call with my sister.

DAVE: This is so weird.

This whole thing is so weird.

They sad as hell in my hood,

too, man, but I told 'em we good.

- You know why, LD?

- Huh?

Because we top on Spotify, my guy.

Okay, I told Ally the deal,

and she needs to hear everyone's voices.

- We're top ?
- ALLY (OVER PHONE): Hello?

- Ally's on the phone.

- Oh. Ally.

- Oh, I forgot to... Hey.

- Dave?

- We're okay. - God, you're fine.

- GATA: Good, Ally, we good, yo.

- Top on Spotify, baby.

- Do you guys have any idea

what the past four hours has been like?

I... What are you doing?

Y-You need to stop and tell

- everyone that you are not dead.

- No, we don't have to...

- You cannot let anybody...

- This is not important at all.

- (DISCONNECT TONE)
- I'm sorry, it's just not.

- EMMA: What are you doing?

- We need cash. Does anybody have cash?

If we're gonna stay at a motel tonight,

we can't use a credit

card. They're traceable.

What is the issue if it's traceable?

You said we're doing nothing wrong.

We're not doing anything wrong.

And if traceability's an issue,

we were just all on the phone.

That-That's two different things.

Two different systems.

Hey, I think I see a

pawnshop over there.

Pawnshop.

Does anybody have anything we can pawn?

I ain't got sh*t.

Oh... (SCOFFS)

Come on, man.

Y'all f*cking tripping, dawg.

(PHONES CHIMING)

MIKE: This is crazy, man.

(CRUNCHING)

DAVE: Look who's catching up.

God, you sound like

you're eating gravel.

- So loud.
- You know,

if I wasn't on Adderall,
I would be, like, , pounds.
I can't stop.

♪ H-E-A-R-say, why, that's hearsay... ♪

DAVE: Oh, they put

it out. Good for them.

- That's smart.
- Whoa.

Post Malone just dropped an

"I'm Drunk" acoustic remix.

- No, he didn't.
- Yeah, he did.

That f*cking tattooed rat.

I literally DM'd him the

second I made that song

'cause I knew he'd be a perfect fit

for it, and he didn't even respond.

Get that sh*t taken down.

- Have the label take it down.

- No, Dave, this could be huge.

Trying to ride my f*cking death?

- No...
- Think about this for a second.

I know I said tomorrow,

but it's a down week on Billboard.

Nothing new dropped.

Okay.

I'm saying it's-it's Monday

night. It's almost Tuesday.
Billboard stops counting
streams on Thursday.

Are you telling me

that there's a legitimate

shot at a number one here?

I am telling you that I've been

running the numbers all day long,

and Penith as an album

and "I'm Drunk" as a single

have a very good chance of

being the number one album

and the number one single in

the country at the same time.

I've told you that the only way

I'm gonna be satisfied in life

- is if I have...
- A number one on Billboard, I know.

I know it's a really dumb way

to live your life, but I...

No, you want to be acknowledged

at a given point in time

by the industry as the best.

And you'll have achieved your dream

- and be free.
- And be free.

- I say this all the time?

- A lot, yeah.

But I'm listening.

So what does that mean? Two more
days and then we get number ones?

(LAUGHS) Look at me.

But that's lying.

- What's lying?
- That's lying.

If we don't come out and...

Uh, you said... we agreed

- on tomorrow morning.
- There is no lie to be told.

You didn't say anything,

you didn't do anything.

- I got to look this sh*t up.

- Dave, you're not on social media.

You're off the grid.

You're off the grid.

I'm never getting off my phone.

This is the most interesting

content in the world.

- Everyone's talking about me.

- You're gone.

- You want to be number one? You're gone.

- (SIGHS)

I got to find a way to get

more radio play, like, right now.

I'm gonna go get food. Stay here,

don't move. I'm serious. Please.

I got to sit here like

Anne Frank all night?
You know, you kind of look
like her when you shave. I...

- Oh, my God!
- What?

- What happened?
- Drake.

Drake liked my last tweet.

- Mm. Mm.
- He knows who I am. I have to DM him.

- No! Dave, don't-don't do that, Dave.

- I have to respond.

- I'm DMing LeBron!

- Dave! Do you want your dreams to come true?

- I have to DM these men.

- Do you want your dreams to come true?

- God!
- Then you got to be patient, Dave.

You said you want to rebrand.

What better time to

think about a rebrand

than right now, in

this room, by yourself?

Let me do my thing, you do your thing,

and then the whole world

is gonna be watching

when you decide to reveal, finally,

who the real Lil Dicky is.

Uh-huh.

(LAUGHS SOFTLY) Okay.

I'm on it. Good f*cking sh*t, Mike.

(DOOR CLOSES)

(EXHALES)

(PHONE CHIMES)

ROBYN (OVER PHONE): Dave.

It's, um, it's, um, it's me.

It's... it's Robyn. Um...

And...

(SIGHS)

I can't believe... (RAGGED INHALE)

Ugh, this is stupid.

(LINE RINGING)

(NEW YORK ACCENT): Hello. Yeah, hi.

(CLEARS THROAT) Is this Keith?

Keith, it's Jim Morera.

Yeah, I'm an attorney.

I represent David Burd.

And Mike Spera. Yes.

I know. It's been a long day over here.

You can imagine how we feel, you know?

Yeah. Well, crazy thing...

Mike told me about a

conversation you guys had.

Uh, earlier. Prior. Before...

Yeah. No, I know.

I can't imagine the

guilt you're feeling.

Everyone over there, really.

Yeah, no. No, we're praying.

I'm praying. I'm praying

myself that they're missing,

but the likelihood is high

that they were... incinerated.

Uh-huh.

Well, I'm curious to know...

is the label gonna be supporting

Dave's album posthumously?

Uh-huh.

The-the boys said, you know,

there was something about radio, maybe.

That they'd get radio play.

And, um...

Yeah. Well, they never really

felt supported most of the time.

Keith, let me...

let me call you right back, Keith.

You left these.

Thank you.

They seemed ex pensive. I

didn't want you to lose them.

Thanks.

LD.

What's that stand for?

Uh, Landon Donovan.

Landon Donovan is an
American soccer player.

The U. S. men's team.

Ah.

USA. USA.

♪♪

DAVE: This is all making me feel crazy.

Here's one you can weigh in on.

MGK... who I've never

even met, mind you,

so I have no idea why

he's posting about me

in the first place... wrote,

"I'm so sorry about what

happened in Germany."

What is this guy talking about?

I've never even been to Germany.

Is he just, like, apologizing

in general for the Holocaust?

That's all he wrote?

Yeah.

- Strange.
- Yeah.

"LeBron is listening."

Uh, what is this?

Yeah. Very important. Got

to keep this top of mind.

LeBron is listening. We got

to remember that, it's...

Who is LeBron? Is he a n*zi?

No. No. Anne, you are safe here.

Uh, LeBron is actually

the opposite of a n*zi.

He's a crusader for justice,

on and off the court.

He's got, like, schools and...

really carries himself well.

He followed me today, so...

it's pretty cool.

He's tracking you?

No. No, no, no.

Following, uh...

Hmm. How do I explain the

Internet to Anne Frank?

So, every fact that exists in life

can be obtained,

like, through this box.

And through this box,

you can communicate

with everybody...

on Earth, pretty much.

Y-You know, when I was

hiding from the Nazis...

LeBron could unfollow me at any moment,

which is, like, a

really troubling reality.

And-and that's something

that I need to, like,

keep in mind as well. Because...

I really got to figure out how I'm

gonna get out of this whole thing.

Get out of...?

This. This entire situation.

Are you kidding?

I was worried about scrutiny before.

What about now?

I've, like, opened up such a...

I mean, what am I gonna do,

like, go to a park and be like,

"I'm alive" and hope

that goes over well?

Like, I don't think I've even

f*cking properly contemplated

my exit strategy.

You know. f*ck. It's like,

what are they gonna...

People are gonna eat

me alive, potentially.

Or not. Uh, but,

you know, my life

could end at any moment.

Uh, what I mean by that is not, like,

end my life in the way that you were...

clipped. I mean, like, uh,

today, in America,

they can k*ll you while you're alive.

Which, in my opinion,
is worse than being dead.

Although I can't speak to... I

don't know how you were k*lled.

How did you die? Was it, like, a...

- I-In a camp.
- In a camp.
So it was, like, a slow death.
I-I kind of always imagined,

like, people running up and,

like, Osama bin Laden-style,

just, like... (MIMICS g*nf*re)

- Uh, but...
- (CLAPS HANDS)

Yeah, cancel culture

is a total nightmare.

Yeah, you make coffee in that.

Coffee.

Coffee? No, it's good.

I don't know if you guys

even had stimulants, but...

Did you have Adderall back then?

I'm not on my Adderall.

And it's...

I don't know if that's

why this is happening.

(PHONE CHIMES)

Oh, my God. They just added

six of my songs to RapCaviar.

That's million new listeners.

Is that what you want?

Uh, listeners?
Yeah.

Uh, how many listeners is enough?

Uh...

That's a... big question, Anne.

But, uh, I don't know. You

can really never have too many.

But more listeners you have,

the more scrutiny. Right?

And scrutiny leads to feeling

like everything could just end,

you said. Right?

Very good memory, Ms. Frank.

It was ten seconds ago.

Uh, mm, true.

What is this? Uh, your shirt.

- "Whip"? What is this?

- Oh.

- Whip. Yeah, whip.

- Whip?

Uh, it's like a contemporary dance.

It's actually not

even that contemporary.

It's pretty old at

this point. But, uh...

It's like, uh...

I normally have to, like,
stand to do it well. But, uh...

Hey, how did you deal

with all the scrutiny

as far as your diary?

Y-You...

know of my diary?

Oh, my God. Yeah, everyone

knows of your diary.

- Everyone?
- Yeah.

I mean, I don't know if

every single s... I mean,

it's one of the most

popular books of all time.

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

Uh, how... how did this happen?

How did it happen? Like, I

don't understand the question.

Like, how did it get published?

Uh, I can... I'll use the box.

This is the advantage of the box.

Okay, it says here

that your diary was

published by your father.

Um...
My father published

- my f*cking diary?!
- Anne,

nobody came out of the Holocaust

looking better than you.

- (YELLS)
- Oh! Hey!

You came across

really well in the diary!

You got nothing to be concerned about!

Everyone loves the diary. You're, like,

- a treasure of the Holocau... Uh...

- (KEYS JANGLING)

- (DOORKNOB RATTLING)
- No! Anne, no, you're safe!

You're safe here! Where are you going?

(MUTTERING)

Hey, uh, we got to go.

Elz is over it. I almost

keyed a man in the face.

And-and Gata's ramping up real bad.

- Leave now?
- Yeah, we got to go.

We should go.
I bought a van, by the way.

- So it's... I'll meet you out front with it.

- What?
We need to keep control
of the narrative.

- The narrative.
- Here, meet me out front.

(DOOR CLOSES)

♪♪

(EXHALES)

Being back in L. A., honestly, it's...

just the right move for

the next phase of this.

It's a full media

operation at this point.

Yeah, we got to come out of it right.

I mean, your audience has

gotten way, way bigger.

- Yeah.
- (PHONE CHIMES)

Oh, that's-that's my phone.

Uh... will you grab that?

- I don't want to...

- Yeah.

Who is it?

Uh...

your brother.

Oh. Put it down. I'll hit him later.

Okay. I...
I read it.

About your dad.

Yeah. Yeah, my... our

dad has, uh, Alzheimer's.

It's a... like, a recent development.

- I am so sorry, Mike.
- It's totally cool.

My brother's been taking care

of him, and the deal was...

I-I'd take him to L. A., put

him in one of those... (SNIFFLES)

you know, assisted living homes

as soon as the tour's done.

And...

the tour's done. (SCOFFS)

On one hand, you know, he's

never gonna remember being a,

you know, emotionally abusive as*h*le.

But he's also never gonna forget

to call me a failure when he

sees my face, that's for sure.

Hey, you've managed the hell out

- of this situation, Mike.

- (SIGHS)

- I'm serious.
- Oh, Dave. Come on, man.
It's fine. It's totally good.

I... honestly, I don't

even want to think about it.

'Cause that's why I did this.

I took this tour because I just...

I wanted to be with you and get that...

We're not gonna let my

dad rain on this parade.

I mean, look at what

we're about to pull off.

- Yeah.
- The number one song in the country

and the number one album in the country?

- DAVE: It's f*cking crazy.

- You just got to lay low for two more days.

- hours.
- Please lay low.

I'm not... No one's gonna see me.

And then...

everything that you've ever wanted.

- DAVE: That's crazy.

- You called it.

Do you remember that...

you remember that email

that you sent me before you

uploaded your first video?

That destiny manifesto?

Oh, my God. I forgot all about that.

R-Read it to me.

- You want me to pull it up...

- Right now. Do it.

DAVE: All right. f*ck it.

(CLEARS THROAT) "Lil Dicky"

isn't just my rap name.

It's my actual destiny."

- It's so stupid.
- (CHUCKLES)

"I'm taking my biggest insecurity...

- parentheses, my p*nis..."
- Yeah.

"... and turning it into

my biggest superpower.

I'm sick of seeing people

pretend to be one thing

even when they're not.

That's not Lil Dicky.

And I will never change who I am

just to be successful."

MIKE: Just keep going.

"I'm doing this for everyone out there

who believes they can do something

the right way.

I will always hold up
my end of the bargain.

I will never take shortcuts.

I will never sell my soul.

I don't care how long it takes

or how hard it gets. I will not stop.

Because that is my responsibility.

And whatever happens, I can accept that.

Because that is my destiny.

Today is the day that I am reborn

and Lil Dicky will live...

forever."

♪♪

I don't want to get a

number one like this.

Yo.

Are you...

are you Lil Dicky?

Yeah.

Aren't you supposed to be dead?

Yeah, I'm not.

- Whoa. Can I get a picture?

- Of... yeah.
- MAN: Yo, what?
- WOMAN (LAUGHS): Oh, my God.

Yo, it's Lil Dicky, bro.

- He's still alive?

- He's alive.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

♪♪

(CHEERING)

♪ I feel brand-new ♪

♪ I feel brand-new ♪

♪ I cannot move ♪

♪ I'm feeling brand-new ♪

♪ You cannot say what I can't do ♪

♪ I feel so brand-new ♪

♪ I feel so brand-new. ♪
Top
1 post • Page 1 of 1

PayPal - The safer, easier way to pay online!

© 2000-2026 Forever Dreaming. All rights reserved

About Contact Copyright Shop

Board indexAll times are UTC-05:00

00:00
/
00:41

Powered by 3Di (phpBB Studio)

Privacy | Terms

Time: 0.172s | Peak Memory Usage: 4.96 MiB | GZIP: Off | Queries: 18

This site uses Google AdSense ad intent links. AdSense automatically gen -
erates these links and they may help creators earn money.

Privacy and cookie settings

Managed by Google. Complies with IAB TCF. CMP ID: 300