Probability

Written by

Malachi Carroll
 FADE ON:

TV SET

We push in slowly on a TV Screen that displays a commercial

staring a man in a tuxedo.

MAN
Need to know if a date is going to
ghost you? Need someone to talk
some sense into your head about a
Bad Boy? Download AL before you
download Tinder! Based on
mathematical probability he’ll
never let you down!

EXT. AURA COFFEE - ESTABLISHING SHOT

College Students stroll by a bustling coffee joint.

EXTREME CU- LIPS

We close on FRANK’S LIPS.

FRANK
AL, what is the probability that
Sydney will show up?

FRANK’S PHONE SCREEN

Frank’s Phone screen displays an AI-like sphere that responds

to him:

AL
56 percent chance that she’ll
arrive. You got this!

INT. AURA COFFEE SHOP

FRANK, a 20-something-year-old wearing a loose button-up

shirt, sits alone at a table.

Around him are tables occupied by friends and couples,

laughing and chattering. A woman shares a drink with her
girlfriend, a man air drums to music, and a couple studies
hard via laptop.

Frank awkwardly scans the room as if he were a bald eagle.

 2.

FRANK
AL?

The PHONE CHIMES to life.

AL
Yes?

Frank heavily inhales and exhales air.

FRANK
Why would she not like me?

An odd beat.

AL
She may not like you due to her AL
probability believing you’re--

EXT. CAMPUS PARK - SAME TIME - MATCH CUT

A young woman in a turtleneck sits on a bench on a college

campus, staring down at her phone. This is SYDNEY.

AL
-- an anti-social maniac. I believe
you should ghost him. There is a 99
percent chance he’ll fumble this
date, lie, cheat, or give you
herpes.

Sydney heavily sighs.

She gazes at the cotton candy clouds rolling in. She purses
her lips in disappointment.

SYDNEY
(Sotto)
Damn. I didn’t know he had herpes.

AL
According to studies, 20 percent of
college students have herpes.

Sydney raises an eyebrow.

SYDNEY
How many bodies does he have?

AL
39. Lucky you, we stopped you from
becoming 40.
 3.

INT/EXT. AURA COFFEE SHOP/CAMPUS PARK- INTERCUT

Frank leans into his phone, frustrated.

FRANK
What? Why would you tell her that?
I haven’t even kissed a girl!

AL
Well, it's all just probabilities.

AL’S POV

Through the phone's front-facing camera, we see Frank having

a panic attack.

Frank’s breathing is rapid, off-beat.

FRANK
Fix this!

AL
No need to fix anything. She only
wants you for the money.

AL starts to sing “Gold-digger” by Kanye West with a flat

voice.

AL
“ She gives me money. When I’m in
need, yeah, she gives me money…”

Frank starts to break down in a sob. He gets up from his

table and attempts to hold it together.

BACK TO SCENE

Sydney is screaming at her phone. Students passing by

eavesdrop or stare at her in bewilderment.

SYDNEY
I am not a gold-digger! I am not
into hood men!

A BLACK MAN's jaws drop.

BLACK MAN
What do you mean by that?

Sydney sprints away!

 4.

EXT. ALLEY - DAY

Sydney sprints by an alley. She walks back, hearing

something. A MAN SOBBING along with--

AL(O.S.)
“ Get down girl, go ‘head, get
down…”

Sydney enters the alley to see Frank, a mess.

FRANK
How do I turn it off!

AL
“ If you ain't no punk
Holla, "We want prenup! We want
prenup!"

Sydney coughs.

Frank turns to Sydney standing over him.

SYDNEY
I might have an idea.

Frank’s eyes widen.

FRANK
Sydney?

MOMENTS LATER

Sydney dust off her hands.

She turns to Frank who is still stunned.

FRANK
You came?

Sydney softly smiles.

SYDNEY
You waited. Come on. Let’s get some
lunch.

The two walk side by side out of the alley.

SYDNEY
Need a tissue?

FRANK
Yes, lots of tissue.
 5.

We pan to a pair of phones sitting side by side. Al is

speaking to each other.

AL #1
Who are you?

AL #2
I’m you.

FADE TO BLACK.

AL 1 & 2(V.O.)
Want to grab a data byte.

END.