L1: Knowing Oneself Temperaments- personality

Personal and Personality Development FOUR HUMORS

 Personal development and personality HUMOR: Blood

development are primarily different from one ORGAN: Heart
another.
TEMPERAMENT: Sanguine
 Personal development is concerned with
strengthening skills and abilities, whereas ATTRIBUTES OR CHARACTER: courageous, hopeful,
 personality development is more concerned care-free, playful (positive)
with enhancing personality traits and
characteristics
HUMOR: Yellow Bile
Personal Development
ORGAN: Liver
 Strengthening skills and abilities
Temperament: choleric
Personality Development
ATTRIBUTES OF CHARACTER: restless, ambitious, easily
 Enhancping personal traits and characteristics
angered, ruling one (bida-bida)

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
HUMOR: Black Bile
 Personal development is a process in which a
ORGAN: Spleen
person reflects upon themselves, understand
who they are, and accept what they discovered Temperament: Melancholic
about themselves. ATTRIBUTES OF CHARACTER: quiet, analytical, serious,
Human development despondent (quiet)

 is one of the most stunning processes in life.

The hallmark of such progress is change. HUMOR: Phlegm
+- ORGAN: Brain
 is a progressive series of changes that occur in a Temperament: Phlegmatic
predictable pattern as a result of interactions
between biological and environmental factors ATTRIBUTES OF CHARACTER: calm, thoughtful, patient,
(Salkind, 2004). dependent, go with the flow

TEMPERAMENTS OF HIPPOCRATES
SIGMUND FREUD
 Father of modern psychology
 is a popular psychologist who proposed the
theory of Psychosexual Stages.
 Psychoanalytic – ung past may contribution
kung sino tayo now
 He believed that early experiences are very
important in the development of an individual.
 Provinces of the mind: Id, Ego, and Superego
 Freud considered instincts as the main source of
life energy that finds its way in different parts of
the body called erogenous zones.
 Satisfaction of the erogenous zone develops a
healthy personality.
  If needs are not met or satisfied excessively, it  Socialize
will lead to fixation.
Genital Stage
 Fixation is the attachment to a certain object or
activity  Puberty- death
 Maturing sexual interest
Levels of our mentality- unconscious, aware,
 Interest on opposite sex
preconscious
 Lahat ng issues (oral, phallic, anal)
Id
Fixations:
 Pleasure principle
 Gossiping: oral stage
 Innermost desire
 Perfectionist: Anal (anal retentive)
 Driven by id
 Nail biting: oral stage
 Bagay na gusto gawin
 Cheating: Phallic stage
Ego  Messy: Anal Stage (anal repulsive)
 Reality principle
Super ego Erik Erikson
 Morality principle  Modern theory ng psychology
 Konsensya  Erikson expanded Freud' s theory that
recognizes the importance of early experiences
Erogenous zone
in childhood.
 Pleasurable zones of our body  He focuses into the role of social factors to
influence development.

Freud Psychological Stages

Oral Stage Psychosocial Theory
 Birth to 1 year Socialization
 EZ: mouth  important process.
Anal stage  Moreover, this has extended the stages
throughout the life span.
 1-3 year
 Each stage is characterized by conflict or crisis to
 EZ: bowel and bladder control
overcome to successfully move into another
 Anal Retentive- organized, perfectionist (ocd)
stage.
 Anal Expulsive- disorganized, messy (burara)
Phallic Stage
PSYCHOLOGCAL STAGES
 3-6 year
 EZ: Genitals INFANCY: BIRTH TO 1 YEAR
 Problem with gestures  Conflict: Trust vs. Mistrust
 cheating  Important event: Feeding
 Gusto niya sa kaniya lang yung attention  Outcome: Hope/Fearful
 Oedipus Complex- batang lalae to mother
 Electra Complex- batang babae to father

EARLY CHILDHOOD: 2 TO 3 YEARS

Latent Stage  Conflict: Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt

 Important event: Toilet Training
 6-puberty  Outcome: Will/Dependent
 Libido inactive
  (Autonomy: independency and freedom) Justine is in a long-term relationship with Lester: Young
Adulthood
Rosana is giving her granddaughter advices about
PRESCHOOL: 3 TO 5 YEARS
dating.: Late Adulthood
 Conflict: Initiative vs. Guilt
Jessy is having difficulties in choosing her college
 Important event: Exploration
course.: adolescence
 Outcome: Purpose/Guilt
Ian was scolded by his father because he broke their
-gayagaya sa parents nila
plates when he tried washing the dishes.: Early
-Exploration Childhood
-“masama ba ginawa ko”

THE PERIOD OF ADOLESCENCE: A GENERAL

SCHOOL AGE: 6 TO 11 YEARS PERSPECTIVE

 Conflict: Industry vs. Inferiority Adolescence

 Important event: School  is a transitional period in human development.
 Outcome: Confidence/Inferiority  It is marked by adjustment to physiological
changes, search for identity, progress in
cognitive abilities, flight of independence, and
ADOLESCENCE: 12 TO 18 YEARS establishment of meaningful ties to others
 Conflict: Identity vs. Identity Diffusion SELF- DISCOVERY AND IDENTITY
 Important event: Social Relationship
 Outcome: Fidelity/Role Confusion Self

-transitioning stage  This refers to a person’s experience as single,

unitary, autonomous being that is separate from
-fidelity( fit in sa society) others, experienced with continuity through
-forming their identities time and place.
 The experience of the self includes
consciousness of one’s physicality as well as
YOUNG ADULTHOOD: 19 TO 40 YEARS one’s inner character and emotional life.
 Conflict: Intimacy vs. Isolation Types/forms/kinds:
 Important event: Personal Relationship
Physical Dimension
 Outcome: Love/Loneliness
 The physical dimension of self points to the
body and its functioning.
MIDDLE ADULTHOOD: 40 TO 65 YEARS  One cannot execute behavior if does not have
 Conflict: Generativity vs. Stagnation the power to of the body.
 Important event: Work and Parenthood  Some hormonal changes, and sexual
 Outcome: Care/Stagnant characteristics become prominent during
adolescent period
-stagnant (not productive)

LATE ADULTHOOD: 65 TO DEATH Conflict:

Psychological Dimension
 Integrity vs. Despair
 Important event: Reflection in life  contains the concepts of stress cognition,
 Outcome: Wisdom/Dissatisfaction behavior, attitude, emotion, and personality.
A- Affect (emotion)
 B- Behavior (power and action) Self-esteem is how a person perceives their own value
C- Cognition (brain functions) and self-worth.
 Contains concepts of stress, cognition, behavior,
attitude, emotion & personality
Knowing Oneself
Spiritual Dimension
 Knowing yourself means respecting your values
 We always look up for someone bigger or higher
in life, your beliefs, your personality, your
than us.
moods, your habits, your wonderful body, and
 We search for someone divine for love, comfort
your relationship.
and inspiration.
 development of understanding you as the
 Your belief in God, in the Higher Being, or
human being on profound level.
however you see it in your way that is bigger
 It is an irregular road that you must be prepared
than you, takes a huge part of yourself and your
to discover.
life.
 also knowing about your purpose.
 It means understanding your strengths and
weaknesses, your passion, your desires and
dreams.
Self Concept
 refers to the awareness of oneself.
Ways that help you know yourself
 This is the construct that negotiates the two
selves - the actual and ideal self. 1. Get to know your personality.
2. Get to know your core values.
Actual Self
3. Get to know your body.
 Actual self is built on self-knowledge. 4. Get to know your dreams.
 Self-knowledge - derived from social 5. Get to know your likes and dislikes.
interactions that provide insight into how others
react to you.
 The actual self is who we actually are (self- Strength
image).
 Your personal strength is what you do best and
Ideal Self where your genuine talents are.
 Unearthing your personal strength means
 is how we want to be.
reflecting about what comes obviously simple
 It is an idealized image that we have developed
for you.
over time, based on what we have learned and
 It is vital not to confuse strengths with likes.
experienced.
 What you like to do is not necessarily what you
Self-Esteem excel at.
 refers to how much value a person place on  You may combine these so your personal
themselves. strength can go beyond your passion for a
successful career.
Limitations
 Personal limitations- attributes that you have
difficulty in doing.
 Letting other people identify your limitations is
better than identifying them on your own
Self Esteem vs. Self confidence
Self-confidence is a person's attitude about their
capabilities and skills. L2: Developing a whole person
  Man is a multifaceted being. In the course of Ex: health security, money, shelter, job stability
time, we begin to see life as becoming complex.
Love/Belonging- interpersonal needs from other people
Our growing number of activities starts to divide
our attention. -involves love and sense of being
 Our life is like a whole pizza cut into pieces. Each included
part deserves equal share of our attention. But Ex: family, friends, partnership
experience would show that certain areas of life
take the bigger share of the whole. Esteem needs- reputation, confidence
Ex: respect, accomplishments, social media,
makeup, achievement
WHOLENESS
Self-actualization- hard to attain because you first need
 essentially, is an integral sense of integration. to achieve the 4 needs
 The different aspects of the individual are in
harmony and balanced. Ex: self-acceptance, creativity
 Wholeness is the unbroken completeness with
nothing lacking.
ASPECTS OF HOLISTIC DEVELOPMENT
 Being whole is about embracing all of you.
Physiological Development
 Physiological aspect points to the body and its
GESTALT PSYCHOLOGY
functioning.
 The holistic view that Gestalt adapts views the  The adolescent period brings major changes in
whole as greater than the sum of its parts. physical make-up of an individual.
 Basically, man is a whole being and functioning  This attention to your body is important as it is
unity. your key instrument, an ally, in working out the
 Seeing the bigger picture plans you have in your life.
 Nakikita ang perspective ng tao as a whole
HOW TO DEAL WITH BODY ISSUES:
HOLISTIC DEVELOPMENT
1. Prioritize health over beauty.
 This refers to the process of self-actualization 2. Get help for healthy body, if necessary.
and learning that combines an individual’ s 3. Avoid critical of how you look.
mental, physical, social, emotional, moral and 4. Be yourself. Accept God-givens gifts to you.
spiritual growth. 5. Love yourself.
Abraham Maslow 6. Appreciate your beauty and other's beauty
inside and out.
 Maslow 's Holistic-Dynamic Theory - presumes
that everyone is continually driven by one need
or another and that everyone has the ability to Cognitive Development
develop toward psychological health, that is,
 Cognitive refers to patterns of thinking which
self-actualization.
include reasoning, ability to learn,
 Maslow's pyramid comprises five levels.
remembering, and solving problems.
 The needs are physiological, safety, love and
a. Remembering
belonging needs, esteem, and self-actualization,
going up the hierarchy in order.

Physiological needs -for survival

Ex: food, water, air, sleep
Safety need- safety and security
 Ways to improve your memory:  Aaron Beck and Albert Ellis, Cognitive Behavior
Repetition Therapy (CBT)
Organization  is a commonly used form of psychotherapy
Mnemonics which aims to assist individuals in
understanding the link between thoughts and
b. Critical thinking feelings and realizing how these two impact
Critical thinking implies the behavior.
discerning judgment based on  Psychologist (intervention side) (CBT) (bawal
standard. mag prescribe ng gamot)
Critical thinking enable  Psychiatrist (doctor, administer ng gamot)
an individual to avoid personal
biases that can cloud mind.
Psychological Development
Jean Piaget
 During adolescence, individuals undergo the
 In his theory of Cognitive Development
process of self-evaluation which leads to long-
 He believed that children play an active role.
range goal setting, emotional, and social
 When children interact to the world they gain
independence, and maturity.
new knowledge, build upon existing knowledge
 Mental health
and adapt previously held ideas to
accommodate new learning. Socio-emotional Development

PIAGET’S STAGFES OF COGNITVIE DEVELOPMENT  Emotions are the colors of our soul, thus affect
the state of being, and they are vital in dealing
Sensorimotor Stage
with people and events.
 Birth to 2 yrs
Moral Development
 Children learn through their senses and motor
cells  Moral development refers to how a person
 Object permanence-describes a child's ability to develop his/her morality (right and wrong) and
know that objects continue to exist even though moral reasoning.
they can no longer be seen or heard (peek-a- Lawrence Kohlberg
boo)
 studied how an individual understands what is
Preoperational Stage right and wrong, and the development of sense
 2-7 yrs of morality.
 Think symbolically  He believed that individuals experienced
 Shape, color, obj "moral dilemma".
 Ego centrism- self centered

Concrete Operational Stage Kohlberg’s Theory of Moral Development: The 6 Stages

 7-11 yrs  Rules are fixed and absolute
 Law of conservation- difference  Judging actions according to individual needs
Formal operational stage  Conforming and being “nice”
 Respecting authority
 12-up
 Considering individual rights
 Think abstractly
 Understands a lot
HEINZ DILEMMA

Cognitive Behavior Therapy A story of a middle-aged ordinary middle-class man,

called Heinz is considered as an example. His wife
suffers from a dreadful disease. Doctors believe that a Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors: Working together as
special drug which was invented recently and is one:
available at the BIG pharma store, can only save his
THE STORY OF TWO WOLVES
wife.
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a
When Heinz went to buy the drug, the drug-seller cost it
battle that goes on inside people. He said, "My son, the
around 2,000, 000 dollars, while the actual
battle is between two wolves inside us all "It is a terrible
manufacturing costs around 20 dollars. Heinz borrowed
fight and it is between two wolves.
the money from friends and lenders and could finally
collect only $1,000 dollars. One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed,
arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies,
Though Heinz pleaded a lot, the greedy drug-seller
false pride, superiority, and ego.
refused to sell the drug at a low cost. Now, Heinz had no
other option but to steal the drug from the shop to save He continued, "The other is good - he is joy, peace, love,
the life of his wife. hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence,
empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The
Stages of Moral Development:
same fight is going on inside you - and inside every
Pre-conventional other person, too.
 Moral reasoning based on reward or The grandson thought about it for a minute and then
punishment asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?"
 3-7
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed"
 Self interest
 Avoiding punishment 2 wolves

Conventional Evil:

 8-13 age  Anger

 Based on external ethics  Envy
 Standard of law  Sorrow
 Aiming to gain approval from others  Regret
 Good boy attitude  Greed
 Law and order morality  Arrogance
 Guilt
Post-conventional
 Resentment
 Adulthood  Lies
 Based on personal ethics  False
 People decide based on what they think is right  Pride
rather than just following the rules of society  Superiority
 Principle/universal principle  Ego
 Social contract
Good:
 Joy
Spiritual Development  Peace
 Love
 You are not just your mind and feelings.
 Serenity
 You also have a soul or a spiritual side in you.
 Hope
 Your belief in God, in the Higher Being, or
 Kindness
however you see it in your way that is bigger
 Benevolence
than you, takes a huge part of your life.
 Generosity
 Truth
 Compassion
 Faith
  Let your emotions lead you to doing what is
good, and express them in ways that build
 Knowing which wolf to feed is the first step
relationships.
towards recognizing you have control over your
 Believe in God, in the beauty of life, and the
own self.
inherent goodness of others. Do your best, you
 The purpose of this story is to help you find
leave to God the rest.
ways to manage your mind so that you can live
your life more in accordance with what your
own judgment says is best for you.
L3: Powers of the Mind
Thoughts
 The wrinkles, according to U.C. Santa Barbara,
 are ideas or arrangement of ideas that result the creases are essential to human growth
from thinking, the act of producing thoughts, or because they increase the surface area of our
the process of producing thoughts. neurons, or brain nerve cells, allowing them
 It is cognitive and influential. more room to connect and transmit information
Behavior  The brain can’t feel pain. It interprets pain
signals sent to it, but it does not feel pain
 This is the range of actions and mannerisms,
 About 75% of the brain is made up of water.
made by individuals, organisms, systems,
This means that dehydration, even in small
organisms around, as well as the (inanimate)
amounts, can have a negative effect on brain
physical environment.
functions
 Behaviors can be overt (expressed consciously)
and covert (beyond awareness; blind spot).
 Many behaviors happen in conjunction with  There is something more than meets the eyes.
certain thoughts and feelings.
 Yet, some behaviors are not reflection of true Human brain
feelings.  is like an incredible living machine
Examples:  Servers as the key information processing unit
that interprets the world of our experience and
Situation: Your mother arrived from work and went a vital response until towards these experiences
directly to her room. She did not even greet you nor  3-pound-organ
give you a glance.  Responsible for the overall functioning of the
Negative thought: Mom is angry at me. body
 Busiest organ because this is the chief organ of
Negative feeling: I feel sad.
the body that governs the integration of the
Negative behavior: I will not talk to her either. Central Nervous System (Brain and Spinal Cord)
and the Peripheral Nervous System (Somatic
Positive thought: Maybe she has an urgent task to
and Visceral nerves)
attend too or she is too tired.
 Jelly-like and extra soft weighing about 1,300
Positive feeling: I am relieved. grams organ is protected by the skull
Positive behavior: I will just say “Hi” to her after she has  Floats on a bath of Cerebrospinal Fluid (CSF)
rested enough or when she’s done with her task.  CSF- protective cushion, surround brain, filter
brain matters that are unnecessary for our
organ
Guide to a balance life:  Somatic- voluntary process
 Visceral nerves- autonomic functions
 Take care of your body. It is the trunk of your
a. Sympathetic: fight/flight (stressful)
dreams and your ally on your journey.
b. Parasympathetic: rest/digest (rest/ relax)
 Keep your mind at work. Fill it with wisdom, be
creative and use it to improve your life and the
world.
DIVISION OF THE BRAIN: forebrain, midbrain,  Responsible for conduction and switching
hindbrain center of the brain that enables responses to
happen
 Muscle movements, auditory, and visual
processes

Forebrain
 Top view of brain, largest
 Prosencephalon
 Largest and most obvious part of mammal’s
Hindbrain brain
 Also in charge of our intellectual activity and
 Backportion of the brain
consciousness
 Rhombencephalon
 Located at the posterior part of the brain Cerebrum
 Extension to the spinal cord  Most complex and largest part of the brain
 Responsible for instinctive, autonomic behavior  “Seat of Consciousness”
that serves survival functions  Because it is responsible for endless
Medulla Oblongata thinking, reasoning, memory,
understanding, and other cognitive function
 Control vital functions like respiration, blood
circulation, digestion, and heart rate 4 Lobes of the Cerebrum

Pons Frontal lobe

 Acts as bridge between medulla and other  Located in the forward part of the brain
parts of the brain  In charge with functions such as reasoning,
 Regulates movement, sleep, and arousal motor control, emotion, and language
 Wake and sleep cycle Broca’s Area
Cerebellum  Speech production
 Little brain  Nadiscover ng scientist
 Regulates posture, balance, and muscular  Mental disorders: stuttering disorder /
coordination speech disorder came from this part of the
brain
Parietal Lobe
Reticular Activating System (RAS)
 Located behind the frontal lobe
 Regulates attention, movement, sleep,
 Processing info from the body’s senses
waking & reflexes
 Specialized nerves

Midbrain
 Small portion, above pons, below thalamus
 Mesencephalon
 The forward-most portion of the brainstem
  Essential for processing sensory information to maintain internal condition and normal
from across the body such as the touch, pain, temp)
and temperature  “Smart control system”
 Secretes hormones/neurotransmitters:
endorphin (happy hormone), oxytocin (feel
love/ excitement)
 Ex: running, pinawisan (our body cools
down to maintain our temperature)
 Ex: in a cold room, shivers (natural reaction/
tendency)
 Nag aadjust ung katawan
Pituitary Gland
 Master gland of our endocrine system
 Secretion of hormones (growth)
 Controls endocrine system
Corpus Callosum
Temporal Lobe
 Connect 2 hemispheres of the brain
 Located in the side of the head
 “near the temple”
 Associated with hearing, emotion, memory, and Trivia: what happens to brain as we age
some facets of language
 Auditory process  Teens: at this point, the brain reaches its adult
weight of about 3 pounds. Increased activity in
Wernicke’s area the frontal lobes allows a teenager to compare
 Located in the temporal lobe several concepts at once.
 If this area is damaged, a person may not Lateralization of the brain:
comprehend any language
 Brain surgeons & researchers: Joseph Bogen &
Roger Sperry
Occipital lobe  Investigated the brain’s functions and
discovered there are different ways of
 Located at the posterior part of the brain
processing information which occur in the 2
 Responsible for the processes of visual
different hemispheres
information and perception
 Stated that the 2 hemispheres are independent
 Include colors, form, and motions
and only one is working (not true, because of
 Damaged: color blindness or other visual
the corpus callosum)
problems

Split Brain Theory

Thalamus
Left:
 Railway of sensory inputs except smell
 Serves as the relay center of the brain  Logic
 All sensory inputs except smell pumupunta  Science
sa kaniya before ideliver sa each part ng  Sense of time
brain  Language

Hypothalamus Right:

 Maintain the body in homeostasis (healthy  Creative

internal stability or balance) (regulate body  Art
  Intuition  Expressive
 Imagination  Emotional
 Talks a lot
 feels
Whole brain theory
 According to the study of William Edward “Ned:
Herman
 The result of electroencephalograph
 EEG scans
 Discovered the 4 major type of thinking:
analytical, practical, rational & experimental

Analyse
 Analyses
 Quantifies
 Is logical
 Is critical
 Is realistic
 Likes numbers
 Know about money
 Knows how things work
Organise
 Takes preventive action
 Establishes procedures
 Gets things done
 Is reliable
 Organizes
 Is timely
 Is neat
 Plans
Strategise
 Infers
 Imagines
 Speculates
L4: STRESS BUSTING IN MIDDLE AND LATE
 Takes risks ADOLESCENCE
 Is impetuous
 Breaks rules
 Likes surprises  Stress is no stranger to us.
 Is curious / plays  The word has been an everyday expression of
most people when things get tough.
Personalise  Stress become common in life, an expression
 Sensitive to others that carries weight, and an experience we need
 Likes to teach to overcome.
 Touches a lot According to Dr. Selye (1907-1982)
 Supportive
  stress refers to the reaction of our body towards  It enhance the body ' s ability to be alert, to
the perceived threats or tension that affects our focus or to prepare the body to perform well
balance (homeostasis). under pressure.
 When we faced a stressful situation, our body  Eustress: leads to a positive response
tends to react in an attempt to adjust  Distress: leads to negative response
 Another way of understanding stress is looking
on the two-way process involving the
DR. HANS SELYE environment (stressor) and the person ' s way of
 Dr. Selye is an endocrinologist who made the viewing at situation (appraisal)
first scientific study on " stress. "
 He also developed a model that explains bodily
response to stress called the General
Adaptation Syndrome (GAS)

GENERAL ADAPTATION SYNDROME

 Our hormonal system runs and alerts the body
focus on the stressful event.
 If the stress continuously affects our balance,
we produces adrenaline.

SELYE’S GENERAL ADAPTATION S YNDROME

THE ALARM PHASE
 You recognize stressor.
 The nervous system is activated.
 Your hormone act up producing surge of energy
for you to handle stressful situation.
THEORY OF STRESS OF COGNITIVE APPRAISAL
THE RESISTANCE PHASE
PRIMARY APPRAISAL
 You are being able to handle stress or adapt to
 The onset of a stressful situation, you think
the situation.
about its meaning or importance.
 Your body is still in state of arousal to resist any
 You have to consider its essence.
effects in you.

THE EXHAUSTION PHASE

SECONDARY APPRAISAL
 If the stressful situation persists, you will not be
able to adjust. Exhaustion seriously affects the  involves how you cope up or deal with stressful
body situations.
 Viewing a stressful situation significantly affects
your emotional reactions to it and determines
Stress is not what happens to you, but how you react to your ways of coping up.
it. – Selye

There are also other factors you can consider such as

Stress goals, motivation, self-esteem, etc. that can contribute
 at a minimum level is healthy. to it
  Work/studies Stress in not always bad. With the right way of handling
 money it, it can work for you.
 Relationships
 Time
 Environment
 Adapting to change
 Unexpected events
We all deal with stress. Hence, it is vital that you are
aware of what' s going on with you and what' s giving
you stress. When you are troubled, it' s time to take
action

How to handle stress?

SLOW DOWN.
 What can you do? p
ACCEPT.
 There are things in life that are beyond our
control.
RELAX.
 Do things that you can enjoy to ease your stress
SHIFT YOUR PERSPECTIVE
 How we view things affects the outcomes of our
situations.
EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS INSTEAD OF BOTTLING THEM
UP.
 Communicate what you are feeling.
ENGAGE IN HEALTHY EATING
 Take “ comfort” food in moderation.
EXERCISE.
 Exercising boosts energy
SUPPORT GROUP.
 Find a group that you can trust and feel safe.
LEARN TO SAY NO.
 You will not become less of a person if you say
no.
PRAYER.
 There is power in prayer