Nes/

Terms to Lea

accountabl
characte
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conscienc
empath
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maturit



Objective
This chapter will help you
 Define character.
 Explain what values are .
 Describe the influences on values and how to
choose them.
 Analyze your own values.
 Describe personal responsibility and give
 Mia listened quietly as her friend Ashley members to work together fosters coopera -
talked. Ashley's mother had been laid off from tion. A family that sets aside time to spend to -
work, and Ashley was very worried. Mia gether shows respect and caring. As people
thought for a long moment. "Did you know live each day, they turn to their values to
that Mr. Dobson is looking for a part-time guide them.
babysitter after school and on weekends?"
Mia asked. Kinds of Values
Ashley's eyes brightened. "He is? Why, that
would be perfect for me. I'll give him a call Some values are mostly a matter of per -
tonight. Thanks, Mia. See you tomorrow." sonal preference. For example, Todd and
Mia smiled as she walked down the hall. I'll Nikki both wanted to join a school activity. Be-
find something else later, she thought to herself cause Todd enjoys government, he chose to
as she tossed the piece of scrap paper with enter the student council. Nikki, on the other
Mr. Dobson's phone number on it into the hand, likes the outdoors, so she joined the en-
wastebasket. vironmental club. Values helped Todd and

A Look at Character
What is it about Mia that shows character? In a recent survey on values, 5,000 young people
were asked the following question: "If you were
The word may not be easy to explain, but most unsure of what to do in a situation, how would
people know it when they see it. you decide what to do?" The pie chart below
shows their answers.
People who have character possess m o r a l
strength and integrity. They show
these qualities through their:
 Ability to understand the I would follow
difference between right and my own
wrong. I have
 Commitment to doing I
no
I would do what
what is right. do is best for
 Acceptance of a set of wha
universal values. t
 Demonstration of impro
responsible behavior. ve my

These are the main components of what

character. As you continue to read, you woul
will see their impact—on you, on oth- d get
ers, and on society. me

Values As a Guide
Values are the foundation upon
which character is built. Values are be- I
liefs, feelings, and ideas about what is follow I would
follow the
important. Your actions, the decisions my
advice of an
religiou
you make, and the kind of person you I would do
are all reflect your values. what

A teen who always remembers the

birthdays of family members values Source: Girl Scouts of the
thoughtfulness and family relation -
ships. A coach who encourages team

CHAPTER 3 Developing Character 45

 I Values are shaped in many ways. As this young
Jewish woman accepts religious duty and
responsibility at her Bat Mitzvah ceremony, she
demonstrates the value that religious principles have
in her life.

stealing are subject to argument. Should you kill

in self-defense? Can you steal food to feed your
starving family? Issues like these will always be
debated. They make the formation of your own
value system difficult at times.

Nikki make their responsibility.

choices. Were they Fundamental values
right or wrong? With like these guide people
values like these, and help them live in
there is no right and society.
wrong. Thus personal The interesting, and
preference is an perhaps most frus-
acceptable way to trating, thing about
choose them. values is that they
Many values are aren't always clearly
viewed as either right negative or positive.
or wrong. You might Even values as strong
look at them as positive as those against
or negative. Love and killing and
patience are examples
of positive values
because they are not
harmful. In fact, they
are helpful to people
and bring good
feelings. Envy and
dishonesty are ex-
amples of negative
values. These and
others like them cause
problems in life.
Some positive values
are universal to all so-
cieties. In other words,
they are accepted by
nearly all people as
right for everyone.
Universal values
include respect,
tolerance, com-
passion, fairness,
trust, honesty, and
 Learning values have you noticed
in the behavior of a
Values coach, Scout leader,
You began learning or neighbor? What
values as soon as you values are shown by
were born. All your life friends and
you will be examining classmates?
your values, living by For many people
them, and modifying religious beliefs and
them when necessary.
Values are learned teachings provide
both directly and indi- values. These
rectly. For example, principles
when a father tells his offer a base for forming
children not to hit guidelines to live by.
people, but to solve Som e va l ue s c om e
arguments in from c ul t ura l ba c k -
reasoned, peaceful grounds. For example,
ways, this is direct many Asian cultures
teaching. Values can emphasize that young
also be learned people should respect
indirectly, by
observing the behavior
of others. When Cal
was in the eighth grade,
for example, his
mother went back to
school at night,
eventually earning a
college degree. He and
his sisters were proud
of her. Her graduation
was a very special
event in their lives.
Through his mother's
example, Cal saw the
value of his own

46 UNIT 1 Personal Development

education.

Influences on
Values
People first learn
values as children.
The family is a
fundamental source of
values that people use
effectively throughout
their lives.
Values are also
demonstrated by other
people you know. What
 their grandparents and other elders. Chil - aware of choosing values, and sometimes you
dren learn to value the experience and aren't. With so much information to absorb,
knowledge of older people. Can you identify you may feel overwhelmed at times. You may
any values that come from other cultures? even feel pulled in different directions by con-
Society teaches values in many ways as flicting values. How can you decide which val-
well. Laws, for example, very clearly set forth ues to accept as your own?
what is important and what isn't. You learn
that safety is a value because of laws limiting Developing Values
speed on roads and requiring people to wear Think about this situation. Garrett has been
safety belts. hunting with his family and friends for years.
The arts and media also send messages As hunting season approaches again, Garrett
that are laden with values. Think about all the senses a growing unease about killing ani -
attempts by advertisers to have you form spe- mals, and he's wondering what to do.
cific values. Sometimes these ads give nega- The teen years are a time for increasing
tive values a positive twist. For example, the self-awareness. Exploring values is part of
cigarettes that will eventually give smokers that process. Like Garrett, you may be think-
wrinkles, a cough, and perhaps cancer are ing more about your own opinions and ideas
shown in the hands of vibrant, good-looking about what is right and wrong. How can you
people. Can you identify any media messages make the right decisions?
that operate this way? Comfort comes in knowing that many val-
As you can see, opportunities to form val - ues tend to become clearer in time. There is
ues are all around you. Sometimes you are danger along the way, however. You will al-

Acting
Do You Show Integrity?
I
Integrity means acting according to a code of "You're probably right," Marta said. 'Why not just
values, including honesty. People want integrity in cash the check? The company can afford it."
their friends. How would you feel if a friend lied to It was tempting to do so, but Sumi wanted to be
you? Would you still be trusting? Employers look for honest. Instead, she took the time to write a letter
integrity in their employees. They want to hire explaining the situation. She mailed it to the company
workers they can count on. Voters want integrity in with the second check. A few weeks later, she
elected officials, who handle taxpayers' money and received a thank-you letter from the company and a
make decisions affecting whole communities. discount coupon for her next purchase.

Integrity in Action
Sumi sent away for a shirt from a mail-order
Yo4A4 44144
catalog. When the shirt arrived, it didn't fit properly.
Sumi decided to return it for a refund, but the refund
didn't come.
After calling the company, Sumi finally got a check
in the mail. Then, the next week, she got another
refund check. 'Their computers are really mixed up,"
Sumi told her friend Marta. "I bet they don't even
know that they paid me twice."
1. Do you think that most people
would do what Sumi did? Why or why
not?
2. What positive results other than
the thank-you letter and coupon might

CHAPTER 3 Developing Character 47

ways face negative influences and pressures
to change your values. Here are some ways of
choosing values:
 Aiming for positive values. Ask
yourself: "Will the values I have chosen
result in harm to me or to anyone else?
Will they cause me to do anything
illegal? Will they lead me to regrets? A
yes to any of these questions means
that the values may not be positive
ones.
 Listening to your conscience.
Your conscience is the inner voice
that tells you what is morally right.
Often that nagging feeling that you
have when you are about to do
something wrong is your conscience
trying to steer you in the right
direction.
 Turning to family. Family is often
the first source of guidance on values.
Many people think about what they
have been taught and then live by
those principles. 48 UNIT 1 Personal Development
 Gaining knowledge. When
faced with a decision involving values,
become knowledgeable about the
situation. Get the facts before you
act.
  Evaluating the source. Before Many teens, based on their values, act to promote a
healthier environment.
accepting someone else's values, look
at the source. Is it reliable? For
example, would the values suggested in
a tabloid newspaper, in an
advertisement for beauty products, or
by a gang leader be acceptable? Use
reason and logic to reach your
decision.
 Talking to others. When you
have doubts or concerns, talk to adults
you trust and respect. Reliable people
can help you sort things out.

Your Value System

Once you have a strong value system in
place, it can work for you. Values continually
back up your actions and decisions. Knowing
what's important to you gives you confidence
to behave accordingly. You can make choices
because you know what you believe in.
Why not begin now to explore your values?
Try answering these questions:
 What are your best inner
qualities?
 What do you like best about your
closest friends? Why?
 How do you want other people
to treat you?
 If you could do anything in the
world, what would you choose?
 What people do you admire
most? Why?
 How do you spend your free
time?
 What principles would you
stand up for?
 What values have been
important to your family as you have
grown?
Your value system begins with you, but it
doesn't end there. Your values affect others—
your family, friends, and everyone you meet
every day. Your value system has to operatE
smoothly beside the systems of others. Yot
can accomplish this in two ways. First, use the
ideas already suggested for choosing stron
positive values. Second, use empathy.
Empathy is understanding someone else
feelings and point of view. In a sense, yo
place yourself in the other person's shoe