Unit 5

Essay Writing Skills

Essays are essentially arguments. The word essay comes from the French
word meaning “to try.” The writer tries to show or prove something to the
reader. The audience for students’ essays is their professor or teacher. The
purpose is purely academic; instead of giving new information (the purpose
of most written communication), student essay writers are charged with
the task of showing what they have learned, synthesizing information, and
explaining the thesis in a way that shows their understanding of the subject.
Students are being tested on both their thinking and their communication
skills, so essay writing requires logical organization of ideas.

Understanding Essay Structure

The essay structure often taught in school is the five-paragraph essay. It has
an introduction, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Even though this
type of essay is rarely seen outside the classroom, the form is adaptable to
other kinds of writing. Business reports, for example, are longer than five
paragraphs, but they too have an introduction, a body divided into different
ideas, and a conclusion. Most importantly, the five-paragraph essay model
can be expanded by simply adding paragraphs to the three basic sections.
In a five-paragraph essay, the first paragraph is the introduction. It pro-
vides background for the reader, gets the reader’s attention, and prepares the
way for the thesis statement. The thesis gives the main argument of the essay
and comes at the end of the introduction.
The thesis statement is supported in the three body paragraphs. The
arguments are divided so that each paragraph has a different main idea. The
body paragraphs start with a topic sentence giving the main idea of that para-
graph. A good body paragraph has support for the points made, has unity
(only one main idea), is coherent (the sentences flow and follow logically),
and has transition markers (to signal the relationship between ideas). These
aspects were explained in Unit 4.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 145

The conclusion generally starts with a restatement of the thesis and

goes on to give a “so what?” idea to lead the reader back out of the essay.
The conclusion should not give new ideas to support the thesis. In a short
essay, the conclusion should not summarize the essay because it would be
too repetitive.
Sometimes this type of essay is referred to as a “hamburger essay,” with
the introduction and conclusion serving as the bun holding the meat of the
essay (the body) together. This analogy simply tells students that the body of
the essay is the most important part.

Comparing the paragraph and the essay

Unit 4 focuses on the structure of a paragraph. An independent, developed
paragraph is like a mini-essay. Moving from paragraph writing to essay writ-
ing is not difficult. You need to expand on ideas and write introductory and
concluding paragraphs. Compare this independent paragraph and the five-
paragraph essay on the same topic that follows:

Even with the wide variety of prepared foods available

today, cooking is a worthwhile skill for anyone to have. Most
important, home-cooked foods are more nutritious. Processed
foods contain high amounts of salt, sugar, and fat. People
who cook at home have control over the ingredients. They can
tailor the dishes to their family’s tastes and avoid any food to
which someone may be allergic. Second, being able to cook is
a useful social skill. Inviting friends over for dinner is a time-
honoured method of entertaining. In Canada, home-cooking
has an added dimension when immigrants can share their
ethnic foods with people of a different ethnic background.
For example, many Canadians would love to try home-cooked
Chinese food rather than the typical restaurant fare of
sweet ‘n sour chicken balls. Finally, knowing how to cook is
an important part of self-sufficiency. As much as possible,
people should be able to take care of themselves and not
rely on others. Cooking is not difficult, and people who cannot
even boil water are pitiful. People should start learning to
cook when they are children, but it is never too late to start
learning. [191 words]

The Value of Home-Cooking

With the modern busy lifestyle, people seek to save time in
meal preparation. They often eat out, whether at fast-food
places or upscale restaurants. They buy prepared foods from
the deli counter of the supermarket or frozen meals that just
have to be warmed up in the microwave. As a result, cooking

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 146 part 1: skill development

is becoming a lost skill. While it is possible to survive without

knowing one end of a chef’s knife from the other, the ability
to prepare a home-cooked meal is a valuable skill.
The most obvious benefit of home-cooking is the ability to
control the quality of the food. Processed foods contain high
amounts of sugar, salt, and additives, while fast food is high
in fat. Cooks choose their own raw ingredients and control
the seasonings, so they can ensure freshness and make the
dishes to their taste. This is especially important for people
with allergies or restricted diets. An added benefit is the
lowered cost. Cooks provide their own labour and can thus
spend more on superior ingredients. The same quality of food
would not be found outside of expensive restaurants.
Cooking is also a valuable social skill. Hosting a dinner
party is a time-honoured method of entertaining guests.
Even for casual get-togethers, it is gratifying to be able to
serve food that is homemade. In the dating game, moreover,
cooking is useful. It is said that the way to a man’s heart is
through his stomach, but women are also attracted to men
who are handy in the kitchen. Parents may also expect their
adult children to cook well enough to contribute to holiday
dinners and to carry on their family traditions. For immigrant
families, preparing ethnic foods is a way to keep their native
culture alive.
In addition to the social rewards, cooking has
psychological benefits. People can feel personal satisfaction
when they produce a delicious meal. Self-sufficiency is a
goal in itself because it is humiliating to have to admit to an
inability to provide the basic necessities of life. Cooks can
also exercise their creativity: They can tweak recipes and even
develop new flavour combinations. Working with food takes
people back to nature, especially when they avoid modern
gadgets in favour of working by hand. For example, kneading
bread dough and beating cream can relieve stress as well as
give muscles a workout.
These many benefits of cooking show that it is still an
important skill despite the proliferation of restaurants. Even
people who grew up in homes devoid of the heady aroma of
home-cooking are turning to the kitchen. The popularity of
cooking shows on television, how-to videos on YouTube, and
expensive, illustrated cookbooks shows that cooking is not
entirely disappearing from modern life. If foodies can convert
more people to the benefits of home cooking, everyone will live
better. [470 words]

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 147

Planning an Essay
An essay requires more planning than an independent paragraph. Writers
must make sure that the essay is well-balanced. For example, the three body
paragraphs should be approximately the same length. Each paragraph should
have different ideas with no repetition or overlap.
Writing is generally a three-stage process: planning, drafting, and edit-
ing. The planning stage includes researching, thinking about the topic,
brainstorming ideas, and putting together an outline. The drafting stage
is when the actual writing is done. The final stage involves rereading the
draft, revising, editing, proofreading, and correcting. However, writing
does not always proceed in such a clear-cut way. For instance, writers may
revisit the outline once they start writing because they think of a better
way to organize it. People who compose on a computer may find their
essay evolves from their brainstorming with less of a progression from one
step to another.
Students often spend too little time in the first and third stages; they rush
to get words on paper without thinking about how they want to develop
their ideas, and they are too easily satisfied with what they have written,
reluctant to delete sections that do not work or to proofread carefully to
catch mistakes. Granted, students are often put into writing situations in
which they do not have the luxury of time to plan or edit. If they are
required to write a 500-word essay in an hour, they must concentrate on
getting words down as quickly as possible. However, if they have practised
writing an essay with the three stages, they can work more efficiently when
they are under tight time constraints.

Choosing a topic
The first step is choosing a topic. Usually, teachers give their class a choice of
topics, perhaps related to assigned readings or current events. Often the top-
ics are discussed in class before students have to write about them. Students
should pick the topic they are most comfortable with. They probably have
choice within the topic, such as agreeing or disagreeing with a statement,
or they may have to narrow the topic down. If students can generate their
own topic, they should do this in consultation with their instructor because
it is too easy to flounder without direction.
Here are some typical essay topics:

Describe an ideal job.

How can the use of public transit be increased?

What can be done to make post-secondary education more

affordable?

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 148 part 1: skill development

Why do people get tattoos?

What are the benefits of married life as opposed to remaining

single?

What factors determine how well an immigrant will adapt to life

in Canada?

Activity
In groups, make a list of essay topics you would like to write about.
Exchange your list for another group’s, and rate the other group’s list as to
which topics you like the best and which the least.

Generating ideas
Before you start writing your essay, make sure you have enough to say.
Indeed, if you find you do not have enough to say on one topic after you
have brainstormed, then it is a good idea to go back to the topic choices and
consider doing a different topic. One of the best ways to brainstorm is just to
jot down point-form ideas about your topic. Consider the topic from differ-
ent viewpoints. For example, if you are going to write about the advantages
of wearing school uniforms, jot down points about the disadvantages at the
same time. As you think of the disadvantages, you may think of counter-
arguments that might fit in your “pro” essay. If you are asked to come up
with a solution to a problem, make sure you spend enough time considering
the problem itself and the different ramifications.
Here is an example of brainstorming on the topic “Explain the advan-
tages or disadvantages of living in residence”:

Advantages Disadvantages
• less travelling to and from school • always on campus with students, can’t
• close to facilities on campus (gym, get away
library) • may have to live with people you don’t
• get to meet other students, not just know, can’t choose roommates
classmates • noisy because of student parties
• can be cheaper because you don’t pay • can be more expensive per month
for 12 months accommodation • may have to live on school cafeteria
• don’t have to cook for yourself food, if no kitchen facilities

By brainstorming on both sides of the topic, students can then choose to

write on the side for which they have more to say.
Brainstorming in this manner is an efficient way to start your essay
writing process, but there are other ways of doing it. People who think
visually may use bubble diagrams for their points with lines to connect

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 149

related ideas. Free-writing is a method in which students just write what

comes into their heads and then look through the writing for an argument
they can develop. Some writers ask themselves questions about a topic
(“Why does this happen?” “What can this lead to?” “Who is affected?”)
to generate ideas.
You may need to experiment to find out what works for you.
Whichever method you use, it’s important to think about the topic thor-
oughly to generate enough ideas to choose from and not just grab the first
three random arguments that come to mind.

Activity
With your instructor and classmates, discuss the techniques you have found
helpful for getting started with an essay or for getting past writer’s block.
Consider different ways of brainstorming.

Writing a title
A title is not always necessary, but writing one can help you start your essay.
It gives you a perspective and helps you limit the scope of your paper. If
you need a title for your essay, make sure it is an appropriate phrase. Do not
just put the essay topic question on your cover page. Generally, titles are
phrases, not full sentences or questions. For example, a story in this book is
called “Why My Mother Can’t Speak English” rather than “Why Can’t My
Mother Speak English?”
Newspaper articles have headlines rather than titles. These generally
give the main idea. Short forms are common to save space. Often a tele-
graphic style is used, leaving out grammatical words such as articles and
auxiliary verb. This style is not appropriate for essay titles.

Activity
In small groups, look over the titles of the sample essays in Units 5 and 6.
In addition, look at the titles of the readings in Part 2 as listed in the table of
contents. Discuss the titles. Which ones give you a good idea of the contents
of the essay or article, and which do not?

Exercise 5.1
Write an appropriate essay title for the following topics:
1. Why are male children preferred in some Asian cultures?
(Specify one country.)
2. Should religious schools be funded by the government?
3. What kind of adjustments do adult children and their parents
have to make when the children move back home after college
or university?

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 150 part 1: skill development

Exercise 5.1 – continued

4. What can people do in their everyday lives to lessen
environmental damage?
5. What are the advantages of sending text messages over voice
calls?

Writing an outline
An outline is a plan for an essay. Following the plan keeps you on track as
you write. An outline can be very detailed or very simple. It can be written
in full sentences or have point form. A basic outline for a five-paragraph
essay would have the thesis and the three topic sentences; these sentences
would be revised as you write the draft. You can also include the supporting
points in your outline.
Here is an example of an outline, followed by the full essay:

Thesis: The family meal lets people share food, learn good
behaviour, and spend time together.

1. Eating together:
home-cooked, more nutritious food
eating slowly
variety of foods
traditional foods

2. Good behaviour:
table etiquette
sharing chores

3. Time to talk:
news to share about the day
current events

The Family Meal

In today’s hectic lifestyle, meals have become little more
than pit stops. People grab something on the run, often
fast food or processed foods, and rarely take the time to
sit down and enjoy a meal together with the most important
people in their lives—their families. However busy their
lives become, they should take the time to gather together
for meals. The family meal provides people with an

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 151

opportunity to share food, learn good behaviour, and spend

time together.
A meal is primarily about the food, and a shared family
meal offers many health benefits. The food is generally more
nutritious, since it is more likely to be home-cooked. It is
usually consumed more slowly—which is also good for the
digestive system. Children are introduced to foods they might
not eat if they are accustomed to having individual meals.
Shared dinners often feature food that is traditional to the
family and its ethnic culture. Moreover, children may learn how
to appreciate and prepare such foods.
The family meal also offers opportunities to learn good
behaviour. Children can practise proper table etiquette when
they share a relaxed meal at home rather than grabbing a
burger at a drive-through. These good manners will serve
them well later when they are attending business lunches or
wedding receptions. The meal also offers a good opportunity
for family members to share the chores of preparing and
serving the meal and cleaning up afterward. Children who
have learned to work together in this way grow up to be more
considerate and less likely to sit around expecting to be
waited on.
Finally, dinnertime is an occasion for enjoyable, relaxed
conversation. Because the meal is at the end of the day,
everyone will have news to share, so it is the best time for
conversation. Children can tell what they learned at school,
and parents can relate events from their workday. They can
discuss current events and exchange opinions. They can even
discuss problems and find solutions. Not only will they practise
communication skills but also problem-solving techniques. With
everyone leading such busy lives, a shared meal is a uniting
element, giving family members an opportunity to communicate
with one another.
The benefits of a shared family meal are so profound
that people should not eliminate it from their lives, no
matter how busy they get. Modern families must take a
good hard look at their schedules and take some time off
from business meetings, extracurricular activities, and clubs
to spend time together as a family sharing a meal. Even
if they find it impossible to arrange to eat together every
evening, they should schedule a family meal once a week at
the very least.

You can compare this essay to paragraph C on pages 140–1.

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 152 part 1: skill development

Exercise 5.2
Here are some brainstorming notes on the topic “What factors
determine how much second-generation immigrants will maintain
their mother tongue?” Arrange the ideas in three paragraphs. Write
a topic sentence for each paragraph. Work with a partner or in a
small group:
a) whether they attend language school for their mother tongue
b) how well their parents speak English
c) the birth order (oldest child versus youngest)
d) whether they visit their parents’ native country
e) whether they live with or frequently visit grandparents who do
not speak English
f) whether the children live in a community where many
immigrants speak that language
g) the attitude of the second generation toward the ethnic culture
h) whether they can read and write in that language
i) how useful the language is for international business or travel
j) whether the parents encourage the children to speak the
language

Writing a Thesis Statement

The thesis statement is the most important sentence in the essay. It comes
at the end of the introduction. A thesis statement is a complete, concise,
grammatical statement that presents a supportable idea that can be explored
in the scope of the essay. The thesis gives the writer’s viewpoint. It answers
the question posed and narrows the topic. For instance, if the topic question
is, “Should religious schools be funded?” a possible thesis would be “Public
funding should be extended to all religious schools in Ontario.” In addition,
the thesis should be in the essay writer’s own words and should not repeat
the phrasing of the topic question.
A thesis statement should not be a fact:

The size of the average family grew during the baby boom.
[poor thesis]

The baby boom had sociological, economic, and political

effects in Canada. [better]

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 153

It should not present a personal opinion that cannot be argued:

I like biking. [poor thesis]

Biking is an enjoyable, healthy, and socially responsible

activity. [better]

It should not be too broad for the essay:

Teenagers face many problems growing up. [poor thesis]

Children of immigrant parents have to deal with cultural

differences. [better]

It should not be too narrow:

Second-generation immigrants may not like the potential

spouse picked out by their parents. [weak]

Second-generation immigrants may not accept the idea of a

traditional arranged marriage. [better]

It should not be an announcement:

In this essay, I am going to compare big-box stores with

independent businesses. [poor thesis]

Independent stores offer knowledgeable service, good product

choice, and shopping convenience. [better]

Note that a thesis statement is a complete, concise, grammatical statement.

It cannot be a fragment:

Working at home. [incorrect]

Working at home offers several advantages over working in an

office. [better]

It cannot be a question:

What is the best way to stop teenagers from smoking?

[incorrect]

Anti-smoking campaigns need to be tailored to teenagers’

concerns. [better]

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 154 part 1: skill development

It cannot be a command:

Note the differences between King Lear and Macbeth. [incorrect]

Shakespeare’s King Lear and Macbeth are two very different

rulers. [better]

It must be one statement, not four:

Swimming pools in school are a good investment for three

reasons. First, swimming is so important that all children
should learn how to swim. Second, having pools on-site is very
convenient for lessons. Third, the community can use the pool
after school hours, making it more economical. [incorrect]

Swimming pools in school are a good investment because of

the need for basic swimming skills, the convenience of the
on-site facility, and the potential for community use. [better]

If the thesis lists the arguments of the body paragraphs, it must have parallel
structure (see page 84 for an explanation of parallel structure):

The family meal means that people can share food, spending
time together, and they can learn good behaviour at the table.
[incorrect]

The family meal provides people with an opportunity to share

food, spend time together, and learn good behaviour at the
table.

In a five-paragraph essay, the thesis statement may state the three main ideas
to be discussed in the body, but in a longer essay this is not practical and a
less specific thesis is presented:

Teenagers often conflict with their parents on their social life,

appearance, and household responsibilities. [good for a five-
paragraph essay]

Teenagers’ relationship with their parents is often full of conflict.

[good for a longer essay]

If the thesis statement lists the arguments of the body paragraphs, the
thesis should be concise, with the three main ideas expressed in short phras-
es. Care must be taken to ensure that the sentence is grammatical, follow-
ing parallel structure. In addition, the body paragraphs should explore the
arguments in the same order that they are presented in the thesis statement.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 155

Exercise 5.3
Choose which sentences would work best as a thesis statement.
Explain why. Look for the statements that actually answer the
question. Discuss why the statement is appropriate or not for a thesis.
Topic: In Canada, single adults now outnumber married ones.
There is less pressure to get legally married today. Women are not
financially dependent on men, and religious and social pressure
to marry has diminished. Can marriage survive as a vital social
institution?
a) Today people do not get married or stay married long.
b) In this essay, I will show that marriage can survive as a vital
social institution.
c) Despite its usefulness, marriage is unlikely to continue to be
essential in Canadian life.
d) Marriage is a social institution in Canada.
e) People get divorced because they fall out of love, they change
their outlook on life, or they get tired of staying with one
person.
f) Today there is no reason to get legally married in North
American society.
g) People get married because of financial, social, and religious
reasons.
h) Marriage will remain important in Canadian society because of
tradition, legal incentives, and the human desire to mark life
events.
i) People do not have to get married any more because our
society accepts unmarried couples.
j) It is difficult to stay married through decades of being with one
person.

Exercise 5.4
Here are incorrect four-sentence theses. Rewrite them into one
concise, grammatical thesis statement. Take out any information
that can be explained in the body paragraphs:
1. There’s a lot of evidence to show that fast food is unhealthy,
but people keep eating it. They like it because it’s cheap. It
tastes good. Fast food is very convenient.

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 156 part 1: skill development

Exercise 5.4 – continued

2. People get tattoos for many reasons. One, they want to
decorate their bodies. Two, they want to show that they belong
to a specific group. Three, tattoos illustrate what they are
attached to.
3. There are three main reasons for leasing a car. First, the monthly
payments are lower. Second, you can always drive a new car after
the three-year lease is over. Third, I don’t have to worry about
breakdowns as usually everything is covered under warranty.
4. For students who are at a loss during a teachers’ strike, these
are things they can do. They can read their textbook and review
their notes. They should complete any assignments given
before the strike so they will be up-to-date and maybe even
ahead when the strike is over. They could do extra reading on
the subject material to truly master it.
5. There are several basic types of tv commercial. One is the
lifestyle ad where advertisers want consumers to think they will
have the kind of life depicted in the commercial if they use the
product. Another kind is the humorous commercial that tries to
make the consumer laugh and therefore remember the product.
Third, there are straight information commercials that tell the
consumer what he needs to know.
6. The transportation system can be fixed if everyone cooperates.
First, the public transit system needs to be improved to make
it more convenient to use. Second, more goods need to be
shipped by rail instead of by truck. Finally, use of personal
vehicles needs to be controlled with fines or incentive programs.

Exercise 5.5
Rewrite these thesis statements so that they are concise and
grammatical, with parallel structure:
1. The government should encourage young people to vote by
teaching them about politics in schools, showing political news
on television shows geared to them, and how easy voting is.
2. By reducing the workweek, the employment rate would be lower
with more people working, productivity would go up, and more
time for families and to enjoy life.
3. Parents can help their children go off to college by giving them
money for tuition and living expenses, help them choose a

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 157

Exercise 5.5 – continued

school and program, and to encourage them when they are
feeling discouraged.
4. The advantages of shopping online are that buyers can choose
from a wide array of items, many of which may not be available
in local stores, and they can do this shopping at home which
is more convenient than going to the mall, and compare prices
and read reviews before they buy.

Exercise 5.6
Write a thesis statement for the following essay topics:
1. What is the key to success in college?
2. Should second-generation immigrants be encouraged to marry
within their ethnic group?
3. How do high school students benefit from a part-time job?
4. Why are extracurricular activities important in school?
5. What factors should a student consider when choosing post-
secondary education?
You can also write thesis statements for the topics you generated in
the activity on page 148.

A thesis statement should

• answer the essay question;
• show the point of view of the writer;
• be one sentence;
• be the last sentence of the introduction;
• be concise;
• have parallel structure.

Writing an Introduction
The function of an introduction is, of course, to introduce the topic to the
reader. In a five-paragraph essay, the first paragraph is the introduction,
while in a longer essay or report, the introduction may extend to several
paragraphs or a whole section or unit. In an essay, the introduction generally

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 158 part 1: skill development

ends with the thesis statement. The introduction leads the reader gradually
to the thesis, provides any background information the reader may need,
and narrows the topic.
What is actually in the introduction depends on the topic. For
instance, an essay discussing solutions to a problem should have an intro-
duction that explains the problem for the reader. In an essay discussing one
side of a controversial issue, the main opposing arguments can be men-
tioned briefly in the introduction as a lead-in. If a reading (e.g., a book, a
story, an article) is a point of departure for the essay, the point of view of
the reading’s author may be mentioned before the essay writer goes into
his or her own thesis.

Sample introductions
A) In an essay that discusses the effects of overwork, it would be appropri-
ate to explain the causes first:

Although it was once predicted that technology would result in

too much leisure time for workers, the opposite seems to have
happened. Instead of working fewer hours, we are working
harder than ever. Downsizing has put pressure on surviving
employees. Cellphones and laptops mean that workers are in
contact with clients and their work at all times. As a result,
stressed-out workers are showing signs of physical, mental,
and social problems.

B) In an essay in favour of euthanasia, the main arguments against it could

be mentioned in the introduction:

Even though euthanasia is already practised in Canadian

hospitals, many people do not want the procedure legalized
and controlled. They fear that it would lead to the “murder” of
the terminally ill, the elderly, and the disabled. They think that
life and death should be in the hands of God. However, mercy
killing can mean a more humane way of dying, a return to a
natural life cycle, and a measure of control to those whose life
spans are at an end.

C) This introduction establishes that starting college is both exciting and

challenging before explaining the difficulties:

Graduating from high school and going off to college is an

exciting time. Students look forward to being on their own and
pursuing the studies that will lead them to a career. However,
many find that this is not as easy as they thought it would be.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 159

First-year students may even drop out when they find they
cannot make the transition to college successfully. College
students have to adjust to living on their own, being
responsible for their studies, and coping with financial
limitations.

D) In an essay that responds to a reading, it is useful to recap the author’s

arguments:

In “The New Heavyweight Champions,” Margaret Wente

explains that as men are losing their well-paying jobs in the
recession, women are becoming the primary breadwinners.
Men are not pursuing the education required for employment
in the knowledge economy. Wente wonders what will happen
to marital relationships in the future. These social changes
will require men and women to abandon traditional roles and
establish equality in their relationships.

Students often struggle writing the introduction. It is helpful to

remember that an introduction does not have to be written first—it
appears first in the essay, but it might be easier to write it when the body
of the essay is drafted, as long as the writer has a thesis as a beginning point.
Because the introduction and conclusion often contain ideas that do not
fit the body, writing the introduction later can work. Moreover, writers
who are blocked at the introduction might find that drafting the body can
cure this block.
One common mistake is starting the introduction with the thesis—
this leaves no room to do anything else but proceed to the arguments
of the essay. Here is an example for the topic “What are the benefits of
studying abroad?”

When it comes to the benefits of studying abroad, it is

often said that people who have an opportunity to study
abroad will have a new life and a bright future. Because
of the development of the global economy and education,
an increasing number of students choose to study abroad.
This phenomenon has become more common than it was
30 years ago. Studying abroad can help students learn
a new culture, have friends from different countries, and
acquire an advanced education.

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 160 part 1: skill development

Note that this introduction lacks a linear progression of ideas; it zigzags, giv-
ing an advantage of studying abroad, then explaining that the phenomenon
is increasing, and then going back to advantages. Note also that the writer
keeps repeating the phrase “studying abroad,” whereas the improved intro-
duction below uses synonyms:

Choosing to take a university year in another country is an

increasingly popular option. Even though it can be expensive
and difficult to arrange, many students take advantage of the
opportunity to study overseas. They realize that the benefits
are worth the effort. Studying abroad can help students learn
a new culture, make friends from different countries, and
acquire an advanced education.

While an introduction usually moves from general statements to more

specific statements, thus leading to the thesis, it is important not to start
too broad, as in this example:

Technology has advanced greatly through the years. We rely

on technology. We cannot live without it. Banning cellphone
use in class is unfair.

In a nutshell, the introduction should catch readers’ attention and prepare

them for the essay. It does not have to be very long (the body paragraphs
should be longer), so do not overdo it.

Exercise 5.7
Write an introduction (three to five sentences) for the thesis
statements you generated in Exercise 5.6.

Tips for an introductory paragraph

• It should gradually lead the reader to your thesis, which is the
last sentence of the introduction.
• It should give background information to the reader or prepare
the way for your thesis.
• It should not mention arguments in support of your thesis
(i.e., it should not repeat statements that are in your body
paragraphs).
• It should not be longer than a body paragraph, in most cases.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 161

Writing Body Paragraphs

Body paragraphs in an essay are essentially the same as the developed para-
graphs discussed in Unit 4. Each starts with a topic sentence giving the main
idea. The rest of the paragraph has points and support. A body paragraph,
however, is generally shorter than an independent paragraph, and it does not
require a concluding sentence.
In an essay, the topic sentences of the body paragraphs take their cue
from the thesis statement. In other words, they should relate to the thesis by
taking the same idea but narrowing it down for the focus of the paragraph.
The wording should be different so that the sentences are not repetitive.

Thesis statement: Public transit is a worthwhile investment

because it is good for citizens’ health,
finances, and quality of life.

Topic sentence #1: Public transit leads to health benefits for

the whole population.

Topic sentence #2: Investing in a better transit infrastructure

ultimately saves money for everyone.

Topic sentence #3: Citizens’ quality of life improves as more

people use public transit and the number
of cars on the roads decreases.

A topic sentence such as “Cars produce a lot of pollution” does not link
directly to the thesis because it does not mention the benefits of transit. The
reference is oblique; the readers have to make the connection rather than the
writer having made it for them.
Remember that the topic sentence of each body paragraph should be
clear on its own. Use nouns, not pronouns, in the first sentence of a para-
graph. For example, Topic sentence #1 above cannot read “It leads to health
benefits for the whole population” because the “it” cannot refer back to a
noun (public transit) in the previous paragraph. Each paragraph is a new
beginning, so nouns should be clearly identified.
The topic sentence sometimes links to the previous paragraph. For exam-
ple, if the first body paragraph of the essay talks about the money earned at a
part-time job, the second paragraph might begin “In addition to the much-
needed income, part-time jobs offer an opportunity to learn new skills.”
Body paragraphs in an essay do not need concluding sentences, especially
concluding sentences that just repeat the topic sentence. However, you can
use a concluding sentence in the paragraph if it is necessary and works well.

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 162 part 1: skill development

Exercise 5.8
Here is an introduction with a thesis statement. For each body
paragraph, choose the best topic sentence of the four choices.
Explain your choice.
Personal vehicles have long been recognized as major sources of
pollution. While it is relatively easy to give up driving a car in major
cities that are well served by public transit and have other initiatives
such as car sharing, a personal vehicle is a necessity for most
Canadians. Even if they must drive, however, they can reduce the
harm caused by their car by changing what, when, and how they drive.
1. a) Bigger vehicles such as suvs burn more gas and therefore
emit more toxic gas.
b) Canadians should choose a more fuel-efficient vehicle.
c) All Canadians should buy hybrid cars because they produce
less pollution.
d) People should take public transit instead of driving.
2. a) Most Canadians can reduce the number of trips they take
by car.
b) Car-pooling is a good method to reduce the use of personal
vehicles.
c) The government should improve the public transit system.
d) When should people use a car?
3. a) Most people drive too fast and too far, and so they burn too
much gas.
b) In addition to using public transit, Canadians should walk
and cycle more.
c) Using a gps system can prevent getting lost and driving too
much.
d) Good driving habits can also lead to a reduction in the
polluting effects of cars.

Exercise 5.9
Write three topic sentences for each of the following thesis
statements:
1. Students should pick a post-secondary program based on their
interests, their skills, and the job prospects.
2. History courses are important because they teach critical
thinking skills, explore life lessons, and inform students about
their heritage.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 163

Exercise 5.9 – continued

3. How easily immigrants adapt to their new country depends on
their educational background, their language skills, and their
personality.

Writing a Conclusion
Conclusion paragraphs are similar to introduction paragraphs. Unlike body
paragraphs, they are not developed with a topic sentence, arguments, and
support. Like an introduction, a conclusion should not contain ideas that
support the thesis statement. The conclusion starts with a restatement of
the thesis, but that is the only repetition, and it should not be in the same
words. In longer essays, you can write a short summary in a conclusion, but
this is not advisable in short essays because it is too repetitive. Similar to the
introduction, the conclusion should be shorter than the body paragraphs.
A conclusion can give the “so what?” idea showing the significance of
what has been argued in the essay. It can offer suggestions for improvement
or predict the future. It should not spring on the reader a preference or
point of view because this should have been clear in the thesis statement. A
conclusion should not apologize for brevity (e.g., “These are only some of
the problems teenagers face”) or make new points to support the thesis. It
is the last thing said to the reader, so the conclusion should have a punch.
Here are sample conclusions for the same topics as the sample introduc-
tions on pages 158–160:

A) With all these harmful effects of working long hours, we

should make a change in our work habits. Even though
cutting hours would result in lower pay, we have to value
our health above anything else. We need to make sure we
lead a balanced life and not work ourselves to death.

B) Euthanasia must be considered now that life and death is

no longer a simple matter. Society must come to grips with
the issue, and people must acknowledge that it already
happens. Physicians play an important role, as does
technology. We cannot turn back the clock, so we must
accept dealing with a complex issue in a complex world.

C) If students can make these adjustments to college

life, they will be successful in school. Moreover, they
will have gained maturity and learned to deal with
responsibility. This will be as valuable as their education
in their future life.

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 164 part 1: skill development

D) By sharing household responsibilities, pooling financial

resources, and avoiding gender stereotyping, couples can
adapt to the new economic realities and forge a life together.
The future, however, will undoubtedly hold more social
change that families will have to adapt to. The key to this
adaptation is not to be bound by traditional roles and rules.

Exercise 5.10
Write conclusions to go with the introductions you generated in
Exercise 5.7.

Practising Essay Writing

Here are some brainstorming notes you can use for practice. You can work
alone, with a partner, or in a group. Working with the same base allows
you to compare results in the class. You can focus on different parts of the
essay: the outline, the thesis, topic sentences, body paragraphs, introductions,
and conclusions. For example, each group can write an introduction for the
essay on immigrant assimilation and then compare the introductions to see
the range of possibilities. You can add ideas or eliminate any you do not
think fit your essay.
You can also start the process from scratch, coming up with essay topics
and brainstorming as a class or in small groups. In addition, you can look
back over this unit and develop some of the essay ideas in other activities
and exercises. You can choose to work on one of the essay assignments from
the reading selections or on one of the topics on page 147–8 or page 165–6.

Topic: How can at-risk students be encouraged not to drop out

of high school?
a) arts courses (music, drama, art)
b) counselling
c) visits to post-secondary schools, work sites
d) speakers from the work world, former drop-outs
e) alternatives to regular courses (co-op, independent
study)
f) tutoring for students who are failing
g) variety of courses, both academic and hands-on
h) extracurricular activities to engage the students
i) mentoring with graduates who have gone on to post-
secondary education

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 165

Topic: What factors determine how readily immigrants will

assimilate into Canadian society?
a) their education level
b) their attitude to their new culture, open-mindedness
c) whether they live in an ethnic neighbourhood or not
d) their age
e) their family structure
f) whether they work with Canadians
g) whether they have immigrated reluctantly
h) how similar their native language and culture are to
their new ones
i) how much they have travelled and seen other countries
j) their willingness to learn

Topic: What should parents teach teenagers to prepare them for

living on their own?
a) budgeting
b) cooking nutritious meals
c) keeping track of their bank and credit card statements
d) saving money on food purchases
e) cleaning rooms (bathroom, kitchen, living areas)
f) doing their own laundry
g) dealing with utilities (hydro, gas, cable)
h) dealing with emergencies such as toilets flooding and
power failures
i) how to use basic tools (hammer, screwdriver, paint
brush)

Use the following structure when you divide up the points for your essay:

Outline
Thesis statement:
Topic sentence 1:
Points for this paragraph:
Topic sentence 2:
Points for this paragraph:
Topic sentence 3:
Points for this paragraph:

Additional essay topics

1. Why are some people slaves to fashion?

2. Should textbooks be replaced by e-books?
3. Is money the prime motivator for how hard people work?
4. Why should students read fiction?

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 166 part 1: skill development

5. Why should students study history?

6. What are the advantages of being famous? (Note: focus on fame alone,
not fortune.)
7. Why are hairstyles so important to image?
8. People who do not vote do not have the right to criticize their govern-
ment. Discuss this statement.

Sample Essays
Read the following sample essays, examining the structure. Identify the
thesis statement, and see how the topic sentences relate to it. Look at the
support given for the points made in the essay. Examine the introductions
and conclusions.

The Definition of Success

Many people equate success with wealth. If someone has a mansion and a
fleet of luxury cars, that person must be successful. However, even though
few people ever attain that degree of affluence, many can look proudly upon
their many achievements. Success means making worthwhile contributions
in work, finding a place in society, and gaining contentment in life.
Because work is so important in human life, people need to do a
worthwhile job to be considered successful. It does not matter whether
the job is running a global corporation or cleaning the streets; all work
contributes something to society and need doing. Some work may not pay
very well, such as artistic endeavours, but it should still be recognized as
valuable. Artists contribute memorable performances, written works to
educate and entertain, and sculptures and paintings to satisfy the aesthetic
needs of their audiences. People need to take pride in their work and do it
to the best of their ability to be deemed a success.
A successful life is one that also makes a mark on society. People can
do this through their work but also through other achievements, such as
participating in political movements or doing volunteer work. Raising children
to become valued members of society is a way of making a difference in
the world. Having friends and helping those in need are important aspects
of human existence. Human beings are social animals above all else, so
lives spent in isolation cannot be viewed as valuable as those that involve
reaching out to people.
Aside from what they contribute to society, people are not successful
if they have not achieved some measure of contentment in their own lives.
This may not involve vast sums of money or numerous possessions but
enough to have their basic needs met, such as a home and a family. Studies
have shown that people in poorer countries actually have more joy in their
lives than those in rich Western countries. Moreover, people who gripe and
complain about every facet of their existence must be judged as failures.

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 167

When people want to evaluate the success of their lives, they must look
at what they have accomplished through work, through their contributions
to society, and in their individual existence. A life well-lived is one that has
made a mark as well as one that satisfies the person living it. People only get
one chance at life—they must do what they can with the time they are given.

The Success of Fast-Food Restaurants

Since the first drive-in restaurants of the 1950s, fast food has increased
in popularity so much that the industry is a dominant player in the global
economy. The golden arches of McDonald’s restaurants are one of the most
recognized corporate symbols in the world. The industry has so much clout
that it can influence government policies such as the minimum wage. Fast-
food businesses are successful because they offer food that is cheap, tasty,
and convenient.
Price is an important consideration in the food industry, and fast food
is less expensive than other restaurant meals. A combo at Harvey’s, for
example, is less than $10, so a family can get a meal out for less than $25.
The industry strives to keep prices low by keeping wages low. The factory
approach to meal preparation allows it to hire untrained workers willing to
accept this wage. The industry has also sought to control food production
costs through vertical integration, getting into the agriculture business and
meat processing. The bottom line is that the low price of fast food makes
it attractive to most segments of society.
The fast-food industry has mastered the art of offering food that
appeals to the taste buds of human beings. High fat content is one of the
main characteristics of fast food, and fat makes food taste good, despite
the nutritional drawbacks. French fries, for example, are the most consumed
restaurant food. Leaner, more nutritious offerings are less appealing and
sell poorly. High starch, salt, and sugar content also make the food taste
good and satisfy cravings.
Convenience is probably the most important consideration in the
popularity of fast food. The restaurants are ubiquitous in both small towns
and big cities. The main streets leading into town are often fast-food strips
where McDonald’s, Wendy’s, Taco Bell, and Tim Hortons coexist side by
side. Fast service is a hallmark of these restaurants; the name “fast food,”
after all, suggests speed. Customers can either use the drive-through or walk
up to the counter and get a hot meal delivered in a couple of minutes. They
do not have to cook or do dishes. With North American families struggling
with overloaded schedules, the lure of quick, easy food is irresistible.
Fast-food restaurants offer inexpensive, delicious, and convenient
food to a North American market that needs it. Added to these basics is
the clever marketing of the industry, such as making fast food particularly
appealing to children with toys and play areas. Even though consumers
know that fast food is not particularly nutritious, they line up to fill their
stomachs and fill the coffers of the franchise owners.

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 168 part 1: skill development

Reasons for Body Art

Many people today sport tattoos and body piercings. Although these
adornments have been around for thousands of years, their current
popularity is somewhat surprising, since it does not result from long-
standing cultural traditions. Now it is not only bikers, soldiers, sailors,
and criminals who go for tattoos; middle-aged, middle-class people are
also following the current fashion for such epidermal embellishment. The
reasons that body art is popular stem from artistic pursuits, personal
expression, and image projection.
Tattoos and body piercing can simply be viewed as another form of
human decoration. Body art has its place along with make-up, hairstyles,
jewellery, and fashion. People want to enhance their physical attributes.
A colourful tattoo is just a pretty picture—but one that is permanently
inscribed on the skin. A glittering navel stud is considered sexy when a
young woman has a well-toned midriff to show it off. Tattoos and piercings
draw attention to the body, something people have sought to do since
prehistoric times.
In addition to being attractive, body art can express various attachments.
Some people have a tattoo of the name or image of a loved one. A biker
may have the name of his gang inscribed on his body. People can choose
a tattoo that shows their ethnic heritage, such as a Chinese character,
which might even express a concept the person admires, such as “joy” or
“wisdom.” The tattoo shows what the person believes in.
Tattoos and piercings also promote a certain image that young
people value. They still have some shock value in society, so they are
often chosen by rebellious adolescents. This is no different from earlier
generations sporting long hair to annoy their parents. Moreover, because
the processes involved are painful, people might enjoy the “tough guy”
image associated with these types of body art.
The motivations behind body art vary, but it is currently very much in
style. It will be interesting to see how long tattoos and piercings remain
on the scene. All fashion and fads have their day. While piercings can be
easily removed, leaving only a small hole, tattoos require sophisticated
removal treatments. Plastic surgeons may well be busy in the future
removing the indiscretions of youth, especially tattoos that have blurred or
stretched along with the body.

Personal versus impersonal essays

Some instructors assign personal topics to their students in an effort to
engage them more in their writing. Others want students to practise
writing objectively and impersonally as training for the work world. You
should be able to handle both kinds of essays and know what is called for.
Your instructor should make his or her preferences clear. The question
asked will also indicate whether the response should be personal. Here

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 169

are two essays on the same topic, one personal and one impersonal. (See
page 8 for more on writing impersonally.) Notice that the personal essay
is more specific, while the impersonal one is more general and can apply
to a variety of situations.

Topic: “McJob” is the term coined to refer to low-paying, often

menial jobs that frequently involve serving the public,
based on the model of working at McDonald’s. What
can students learn from working in such jobs part-time
and during the summers?

The Benefits of McJobs

Students often work at part-time or summer jobs to pay their way through
school. These positions are usually “McJobs”—low-paying labour, often
involving serving the public. While many people disdain such menial
labour, students can actually benefit from such work in more than
monetary terms. Students can learn time management, practical skills,
and personal skills.
By working part-time, students learn to manage their precious time.
First, they have to balance their school and work responsibilities. They
know they cannot procrastinate with their academic assignments because
they have little time to waste. Moreover, they learn to be punctual because
bosses are less accepting of tardiness than teachers are. Finally, they
learn to get their work done efficiently and use their time productively.
There is a wide range of practical skills that can be acquired on the
job. These skills can be carried over to other jobs or even to everyday
household chores. For example, students who work as landscapers will be
able to take care of their yard and garden when they become homeowners.
Restaurant cooks can serve their future families good meals. Cashiers can
handle money for everyday transactions. Clerks in clothing stores become
adept at pressing and folding clothing.
Since so many McJobs involve dealing with the public, student
workers develop valuable people skills. They learn how to be polite and
cheerful and how to listen to a complaint without flying off the handle.
Because they deal with such a wide range of people, they have a
better understanding of humanity. For example, a cashier in a fast-food
restaurant will see people struggling to come up with a few dollars to pay
for a meal. Camp counsellors learn how children develop and learn. As a
result, students develop the emotional intelligence that will serve them
well throughout life.
Part-time and summer jobs allow students to grow and acquire skills.
Students have to make sure that they do not take on too many hours,
because their school work is still the priority. However, learning does
not stop at the classroom door, and students should be open to these
experiences that they may not have a chance at again. [358 words]

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 170 part 1: skill development

Topic: What have you learned from working at McJobs?

What McJobs Have Taught Me

As a student, I had my share of McJobs. I worked as a waitress, a cashier,
and tour guide. Although some of my friends sneered at my jobs and
chose to get into debt with student loans instead, I found that working
like this was a good experience. My jobs taught me valuable skills in time
management, food and drink preparation, and speaking to the public.
My work experience taught me how to use my time and energy
profitably. Not only did I have to balance my studies, work hours, and
social life, I learned how to get the most out of my work hours. As a
waitress, I never went anywhere empty-handed; I had enough miles to
walk without having to do them twice. If I took plates of food or drinks to
the tables, I went back to the kitchen with empty plates from other tables.
Even today, as I clean house, I find that I work as efficiently as I did in
my days as a server, making sure I am carrying something both coming
and going.
The skills I learned in the food service industry carry over to everyday
life. Sometimes I had to mix drinks, so I picked up some bartending skills
that still come in handy at parties. At times I had to help the kitchen staff,
so I learned to cook and plate food. I did not even know how to cook eggs
before I had to help prepare breakfast at a truck stop restaurant where I
worked. When we have large family dinners, my skill at balancing plates is
impressive and useful.
Probably the most important skills I acquired were people skills. As
a waitress, I had to deal with rude and picky customers. Serving food
for a catering company took me to formal functions at embassies and
government buildings where I had to contend with a demanding clientele
including dignitaries such as Pierre Trudeau and René Lévesque. As a tour
guide, I learned to project my voice and keep my audience interested—
skills that later helped in my career as a teacher. Because I worked in
Ottawa, I had to be bilingual, so my fluency in French increased.
Even though working part-time made it difficult to spend enough time
on my school work, I don’t regret the hours I worked because of all I
learned. I probably would have wasted more time if I didn’t have jobs, and
my marks would not have been much better. I gained much more than just
the income. [424 words]

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 unit 5: essay writing skills 171

Essay Checklist
• A five-paragraph essay has an introduction, three body
paragraphs, and a conclusion.
• Your thesis statement should be the last sentence of the
introduction. You restate this thesis as the first sentence of
your conclusion.
• Each body paragraph should start with a topic sentence that
relates directly to the thesis.
• The arguments in support of your thesis are in the body
paragraphs and not in the introduction or conclusion.
• Support your points with specific examples or explanation.

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