ACBC Counseling - Question 7

7. List several reasons for concluding a counseling case. For each, describe how you would go about
ending the counseling.
I. Overview
A. Introduction
B. Graduation
C. Admonishment
D. Termination
II. Introduction
A. Galatians 6:1-2 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual
should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be
tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
1. This verse in Galatians lays out a basic concept in biblically counseling. We
who are knowledgeable, equipped, and skilled in wielding the Word of Truth
can restore our brothers and sisters in Christ when they encounter issues. We
do this by bearing one another’s burdens for a time while gently restoring
them.
a. James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of
various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces
steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be
perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
2. Our goal is to walk our counselees to a place where they are not only able to
bear their own burdens but are knowledgeable, equipped, and skilled in
wielding the Word of Truth in such a way that they can restore another brother
or sister in Christ.
III. Graduation
A. “Graduating a counselee is a time to celebrate the changes that God has made and an
opportunity to integrate your counselee into the regular discipleship of the church.” 1
1. As soon as we can, we should begin integrating them into the regular ministries
of the church as part of the counseling process. This allows the counselee to
build bonds with other believers and provides an opportunity for them to see
how believers behave in everyday life.
a. Developing relationships with others in the church might be one of the
best tools for continued discipleship after the counseling case ends.
2. When considering graduating your counselee, it’s wise to provide a bit of
warning. Let him know a few sessions before you plan on ending the case so
that it’s not a surprise, as they may feel overwhelmed and not ready. This
process might work for birds leaving the nest, but just consider the stakes for
the baby bird.

1
Cubby Westerberg, How to End a Counseling Case, from an outline at the 2018 Biblical Counseling Conference at
Cross Pointe Church.

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3. Consider meeting them a few times monthly for some time for a check-up to
ensure they are continuing the right path.
B. 8 indicators that your counselee is ready to graduate. 2
1. Your counselee understands his problem and the biblical way of handling it.
2. Your counselee becomes comfortable with the new response pattern(s).
3. Your counselee begins to practice the new pattern(s) automatically.
4. Your counselee has failed and can diagnose the reason for the failure and make
plans for correcting the problem.
5. Your counselee can state specifically how he has changed.
6. Your counselee has been tested and has been victorious in the test.
7. Others can verify the changes in your counselee.
8. Your counselee starts to share with others what he is learning in counseling,
effectively becoming an informal and spontaneous counselor to others.
IV. Admonishment
A. Should you simply end a case if your counselee is no longer showing signs of biblical
change in their life? What should I do if my counselee is not completing their homework,
or only doing it half-heartedly? Before you terminate a case, consider admonishment.
1. The definition of admonish is “to express warning or disapproval to especially
in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner.” 3
B. 1 Thessalonians 5:14 And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the faint-
hearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.
1. There are times when your counselee may begin to stagnate, no longer showing
any signs of growth. What should you do about this situation?
a. Try to determine whether or not your counselee is saved. Have they been
presented with the gospel?
b. Are there circumstances that are causing a significant amount of
difficulty with your counselee?
c. Has the problem and solution been made explicitly clear?
d. Would your counselee have better success by meeting with another
counselor? Is there a personality conflict or another counselee that has
more expertise in this specific area of difficulty?
e. Are you failing to hold your counselee accountable?

2
The following list of eight signs is derived from “When to Stop Counseling,” [Link]
counseling/.
3
[Link]

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1) 2 Corinthians 7:10 For godly grief produces a repentance that

leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief
produces death.
V. Termination
A. It can be difficult to know when it’s time to terminate a counseling case when it’s not
going well. We have often devoted a significant amount of time and effort to the case and
care a great deal for our counselee.
1. 1 Thessalonians 2:7-9 But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother
taking care of her own children. So, being affectionately desirous of you, we
were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but our own selves,
because you had become very dear to us. For you remember, brothers, our
labor and toil: we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any
of you, while we proclaimed to you the gospel of God.
B. Understanding what to look for will greatly assist a beginning counselor in knowing
when it’s time to suspend or terminate the counseling case. Here are a few specific
behaviors that point toward termination.
1. Lack of seriousness concerning counseling.
a. “Absenteeism. A person who frequently cancels appointments,
particularly for questionable reasons, may be avoiding confrontation. If
this is a repeated pattern, the counselee may be unwilling to change.
Chronic tardiness can also be a sign that the counselee is avoiding
pertinent issues.” 4
b. “Failure to do homework. A second symptom of covert resistance is
failure to complete homework assignments. A pattern of incomplete or
sloppy homework may indicate that the counselee prefers talking to
working.” 5
c. “Distancing. In instances of distancing, the counselee keeps the
counselor at arm’s length. When asked about his or her life, the
counselee is unwilling to reveal detailed information. This reticence may
indicate that a lack of desire to change. Unfortunately, counselors cannot
help people who shut them out of their lives.” 6

4
Wayne Mack, “Biblical Counseling and Inducement,” in John MacArthur, ed., Counseling: How to Counsel
Biblically, 184.
5
Wayne Mack, “Biblical Counseling and Inducement,” in John MacArthur, ed., Counseling: How to Counsel
Biblically, 184.
6
Wayne Mack, “Biblical Counseling and Inducement,” in John MacArthur, ed., Counseling: How to Counsel
Biblically, 184.

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2. Lack of growth and change.

a. During the counseling process, you may notice that your counselee has
begun to stagnate and is no longer progressing. If your counselee has not
progressed in the past 2-3 counseling sessions, admonish them. Let them
know that if there is no progress in the next session, you may have to
terminate their case due to a lack of growth and change. If they fail to
progress after that, terminate the case.
b. An unregenerate heart.
1) Our counselees must have a regenerate heart for biblical
counseling to have any lasting effect. It’s noteworthy that an
unrepentant sinner could receive a significant amount of relief
from their troubles by applying biblical principles to their life.
However, it wouldn’t take long for that individual to fall into
another sinful snare as his own sinful flesh drags him away and
entices him (James 1:14).
i. Ezekiel 36:26-27 And I will give you a new heart, and a
new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the
heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of
flesh. And I will put my Spirit within you, and cause you
to walk in my statutes and be careful to obey my rules.
C. What should you do when you terminate a counseling case?
1. Provide a clear explanation for why are you are terminating the counseling
case. Do this in a spirit of love and with an open door for the person to come
back.
a. One way that you might want to phrase this, is that you don’t think they
are ready for counseling at the moment. That if something changes in the
future, they should reapply for counseling through the proper process.
2. Continue to pray for that counselee.
3. Emphasize the seriousness of refusing to repent for sin.
a. Proverbs 28:13 Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper,
but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.
b. 1 John 3:8-10 Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for
the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God
appeared was to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God
makes a practice of sinning, for God's seed abides in him, and he cannot
keep on sinning because he has been born of God. By this it is evident
who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil:
whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one
who does not love his brother.

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4. What do you do if you terminate a case and your counselee is a member of

your church?
a. If the case is being terminated because of a refusal to change or a lack of
repentance, the steps of church discipline need to be followed according
to Matthew 18:15-20 and your church’s policy on church discipline.
5. What do you do if you terminate a case and your counselee is a member of
another church?
a. Inform the counselee that you will be contacting his or her pastor to
update them on the situation and that you will recommend church
discipline for their lack of repentance.
VI. Suggested Reading
A. John MacArthur, Counseling: How to Counsel Biblically, 176-202.
B. Jay Adams, A Theology of Christian Counseling, 123.
C. Jay Adams, The Christian Counselor's Manual, 232-341.