Coping with 2020 – a workbook

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 Introduction

So the 2020s have just started. This is a brief workbook to help you cope with the
forthcoming decade and beyond. This workbook is being sent to all my students
on all my courses as coping skills are needed by everyone.

Remember this is a WORKBOOK – if you choose to put elements of it into practice

then you will gain more.

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Chapter One: Effective Coping Techniques to Use When You Are Feeling Down

This chapter is based on this article – please click the link and visit the site. As this is
a WORKBOOK I have adapted the article so you can (if you wish) put some of the
ideas into practice.

Remember the original article is here

Technique one: Confide In Others

Name Contact details

When I feel isolated I can
confide in:

One of the lies depression tells the individuals it affects is that they are alone. This is
not the case, and isolation can make things worse. Thus, patients with depression
should try to create relationships with others to ensure there is a support system
handy when needed.

Technique two Physical Activity

Intermittent movement: how I can move

more during the day….

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 Park Run contact details:

Outdoor activities Social walkers:

Technique 3: Think Positive Thoughts

When negative thoughts start creeping in, it is crucial for individuals to change or
challenge them as much as they possibly can. One great way for individuals to
change their negative thoughts into positive ones is for them to ask themselves
about what their best friend might say about the negative thought. What might this
friend say in response?

Negative thought Best friend’s likely Family’s response

response

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Technique 4: Try To Keep Eating Healthy

Paying conscious attention to nutrition is a vital part of self-care, especially when not
feeling well. When individuals feel down, it can be tempting to binge on large
quantities of ‘comfort food’ to temporarily feel better. Alternatively, some individuals
might not be interested in eating much at all.

 First, individuals should eat often enough. This means eating several times
throughout the day, including both meals and snacks. If individuals eat at
around the same times each day, their blood sugar stays steady, which keeps
them from having energy and mood crashes.

 It’s important to not skip meals, either, as this makes the body have to work
harder to digest food.

 Refined carbohydrates like sugar can have a negative effect on mood

because of how aggressively they affect blood sugar.

 On the other hand, diets rich in protein, vitamins, and fiber will help boost the
digestive system and improve blood sugar levels.

Ten Tips for Healthy Eating

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Ten Tips Do I do this?

Choose good carbs, not no carbs. Whole grains are your

best bet.

Pay attention to the protein package. Fish, poultry, nuts,

and beans are the best choices.

Choose foods with healthy fats, limit foods high in

saturated fat, and avoid foods with trans fat. Plant oils,
nuts, and fish are the healthiest sources.

Choose a fiber-filled diet, rich in whole grains, vegetables,

and fruits.

Eat more vegetables and fruits. Go for color and variety—

dark green, yellow, orange, and red.

Calcium is important. But milk isn’t the only, or even best,

source.

Water is best to quench your thirst. Skip the sugary

drinks, and go easy on the milk and juice.

Eating less salt is good for everyone’s health. Choose

more fresh foods and fewer processed foods.

Moderate drinking can be healthy—but not for everyone.

You must weigh the benefits and risks.

A daily multivitamin is a great nutrition insurance policy.

Some extra vitamin D may add an extra health boost.

Also read this from the NHS

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Technique 5: Get Sufficient Sleep

Many studies have established a strong link between sleep levels and mood. When
individuals don’t get enough sleep, or their sleep quality is poor, they’re more likely
to experience stress, irritability, and depression. Healthy sleep, by contrast, gives a
boost to emotional processing and emotional regulation. When feeling unhappy or
anxious, individuals might lay awake at night or be tempted to stay up later than
usual. It’s important to try to get sufficient sleep.

One way is by practicing good sleep hygiene.

This includes avoiding eating for about four hours prior to bedtime, keep the
bedroom temperature at around sixty-five degrees Fahrenheit, and avoiding looking
at screens before bed. A white noise machine or earplugs may be helpful for those
often awoken by noise during the night.

Also read this: 17 tips to get better sleep

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Tip Do I do this?
Increase Bright Light Exposure During
The Day
Reduce Blue Light Exposure in the
Evening
Don't Consume Caffeine Late in the Day

Reduce Irregular or Long Daytime Naps

Try to Sleep and Wake at Consistent

Times
Take a Melatonin Supplement

Consider These Other Supplements

Don't Drink Alcohol

Optimize Your Bedroom Environment

Set Your Bedroom Temperature

Don't Eat Late in the Evening

Relax and Clear Your Mind in the Evening

Take a Relaxing Bath or Shower

Rule Out a Sleep Disorder

Get a Comfortable Bed, Mattress and

Pillow
Exercise Regularly — But Not Before Bed

Don't Drink Any Liquids Before Bed

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Technique 6: Participate In Happy Things

As the saying goes, ‘Fake it until you make it.’ Acting happy during times of
depression can work wonders in increasing positive feelings. Doing joyful activities
such as caring for a pet, walking through the park with a friend, volunteering, or
practicing meditation can be a mood enhancer. Keep busy by signing up for an event
during a particularly tough weekend to prevent the opportunity for sadness to creep
in.

Activity that makes me happy When can I regularly do this?

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Technique 7: Engage In Mindfulness and Meditation

With stress and depression, one of the most common therapeutic techniques is to
engage in mindfulness and meditation. Taking time to relax is just as important for
health as being active. Many individuals are so focused on productivity that they
neglect to relax the way their body needs. Mindfulness is the concept of being fully
present in a moment. It’s a good technique to practice for both relaxation and
emotional regulation. With mindfulness, individuals become aware of their body,
where they are, what their senses are observing, and what they’re feeling. Rather
than being distracted by their thoughts, individuals focus on details outside
themselves and engage with the world. Meditation tends to incorporate mindfulness
techniques with calm breathing exercises and, sometimes, relaxing stretches. When
individuals meditate, they should take ten to twenty minutes of their day to focus on
their body and mind. It’s a way of getting in touch with oneself and becoming more
self-aware.

Here are TEN Mindfulness activities that you can practise today

TWENTY TWO MINDFULNESS ACTIVITIES PLUS PDF

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Technique 8: Turn To a Professional for Help

If an individual has engaged in lifestyle changes including sleep hygiene, healthy

eating, time with friends, time doing activities they enjoy, and meditation, and yet
these feelings seem to persist, the next step is to turn to a professional for help.

When feelings of sadness, stress, and anxiety persist despite there being no known
external cause, they may be a sign of a chemical imbalance in the brain.

Emotional regulation and healthy moods are the products of neurotransmitters. If

certain neurotransmitter levels are too high or too low, it can lead to mood disorders
that don’t seem to go away.

Talking to a professional is the first step to getting on the right track to

improvement.

Key contact details for medical professionals, self-help groups, counselling

groups etc

Name of contact Contact details

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Technique 9: Try Some Aromatherapy

Individuals might also wish to try some aromatherapy to help with their mood. One
important note: most essential oils are toxic for both cats and dogs to inhale, so they
should not be used in areas with pets. There are a number of different essential oils
used in aromatherapy.

 Lavender is meant to be soothing and calming when someone is stressed.

 Vetiver is used to ground thoughts and help individuals become more aware
of the moment.

 Geraniums are supposed to help balance emotions, while rosemary stimulates

the senses.

 Peppermint is similarly invigorating, while ylang-ylang is used for emotional

balancing, jasmine is used to boost mood and relieve stress, rose is used to
relax, and bergamot is meant to provide a refreshing feeling.

[Link]

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Chapter Two: Five ways to deal with emotional stress

I have a personal involvement with Multiple Sclerosis. Here is my Justgiving Page.

[Link]

The following is from THIS site.

Please read the full article

The techniques apply to everyone, not just those with MS.

Anxiety looks and feels different to each person, but common emotional symptoms
include excessive nervousness or worry, difficulty controlling worry, fear, and
apprehension. Physiological symptoms of anxiety can include butterflies in the
stomach, increased heart rate, rapid breathing, cognitive complaints, fatigue, and
more.

If you find that you are noticing symptoms of anxiety, it is important to learn to cope
with it, as excess stress and anxiety can lead to worse MS disease outcomes, overall
poorer physical health, and difficulty in both relationships and everyday function.
Here are some suggestions to help cope with anxiety.

1. Recognize symptoms and seek professional help

Key contact details:

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2. Get outside: Try this: when you are outside, if you are able, find a comfortable
place to sit in the grass and notice your senses. What do you hear? What do you
see? What do you physically feel? What do you smell? What do you taste? You will
notice that while doing this experiment, you are likely focused only on the present
moment and not thinking about the past or the future (whether 10 minutes or 10
years in the future).

Where can I go? What may I see?

3. Invest in meaningful relationships: Meaningful relationships serve as a buffer

to stress. Invest the time to develop a deeper relationship with someone that is
important to you by giving them your attention and time. When you do this, you are
also receiving an increase of endorphins (the feel good hormones), which help
reduce anxiety and have many other positive health benefits. Try asking a friend for
coffee, lunch, or a walk. You could also go to a colleague’s office, instead of
interacting through electronics.

Key contact details

Friend Contact details and best time to
contact

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4. Get better sleep

Bed time
Approx sleep hours
Regular wake time
Morning routine

5. Practice deep breathing and mindfulness techniques: Practice deep

diaphragmatic breathing.

Here’s how you can do deep breathing.

 Sit or lie in a comfortable position.

 Next put one hand on your chest and the other on your diaphragm, which is
the area below your ribs.
 Now, take a slow, steady breath in and allow your breath to push out the
hand that is on your diaphragm.
 Notice if your breath is stopping in your chest, which does not oxygenate
your body and relaxing.
 Do this for as many times as you can, aiming for five minutes.

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Chapter Three : Cumulative Grief

When life hits hard, sometimes the only option through the difficult time is to just get
through it. Get through the next minute, the next hour, the next day, the next week, etc.
You will get through it. It will take time to find a new normal, but it will come.

While dealing with the full swing of emotions grief brings isn’t something we always have time for
in our busy lives, when we don’t address our losses we allow grief to accumulate and overwhelm
us down the road.

However, there’s an option to work through the emotions and gather a deeper meaning of
the losses starting today.

You are experiencing something we all experience―life and death.

These recommendations are to help guide you as you navigate uncertainty and begin
to feel the true depths of grief. It may get worse before it gets better, but it will
get better.

Realize each loss must be grieved individually.

The first step to begin working through the monstrous accumulation of grief is to
acknowledge that it will take time, patience, and some unravelling.

Every relationship is different. The love and memories shared between partners, best friends,
parents of pets are as unique as accompanying grief when one part of the relationship is lost.

“Dealing with all of these memories of loss may seem like an impossibility. That is because
we have been taught our entire lives to suppress our feelings of loss, rather than to deal
with them. They cannot all be dealt with at once. It’s a bit like the old question: ‘How do you
eat an elephant?’ The answer to this is: ‘One bite at a time!’ That is how you can effectively
deal with your many losses as well: one at a time.” –– Grief Recovery Method

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WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Creating space to process each individual death and celebrate each life is
something that will allow for clearing out the messiness of cumulative grief.

To start, recognize each life you’ve lost.

Name Memories
S/he used to make me laugh by….
His/her strengths were:

If he/she was here now I would say:

Name Memories
S/he used to make me laugh by….
His/her strengths were:

If he/she was here now I would say:

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Name Memories
S/he used to make me laugh by….
His/her strengths were:

If he/she was here now I would say:

Name Memories
S/he used to make me laugh by….
His/her strengths were:

If he/she was here now I would say:

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Name Memories
S/he used to make me laugh by….
His/her strengths were:

If he/she was here now I would say:

Be mindful of your thoughts, emotions, body & environment.

The emotional response to the loss of a loved one sends individuals into a severe state of
stress. A surge of stress hormones is released into the bloodstream, sending the body into
shock. The intensity and duration of symptoms depends on the individual body’s response to
these stress hormones.

Being mindful means being aware of what’s going on during this process. It can be both
bringing attention to what’s happening internally―thoughts, feelings, breath, tension, or
pain―and to what’s happening in the world externally.

Bringing attention to what’s happening internally can help to recognize and label strong
emotions for what they are―an always changing feeling that will pass. Inquiring about the
sensations throughout the body, such as pain, can also uncover how those emotions
are affecting the physical body.

Being mindful of thought patterns can help to recognize when thoughts are going down a dark
hole and stop them in their tracks.

If bringing attention internally becomes overwhelming, that’s okay. Moving this awareness to
the outside world can help anyone live in the present moment, even if it’s for one simple
breath.

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WHAT YOU CAN DO:

To practice being mindful of what’s going on inside of your body and mind, start with a slow
deep breath and then walk yourself through the following questions:

 Can I feel the air moving in and out of my body?

 Am I holding tension anywhere in my body?
 What are my thoughts? Can I find something more positive to replace these with?
 Am I dwelling in the past? Can I focus instead on the present?

To increase an awareness of the world around you, walk yourself through the
following questions:

 What do I see around me?

 What do I smell?
 What do I hear?
 What is the furthest sound I can hear?

Whenever grief becomes overwhelming, return to your breath and allow it to guide you
through life. Come back to your breath often and if you’d like extra guidance, try
downloading and listening to guided meditations on the free app InsightTimer.

[Link]

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Talk to trusted friends or family.

By suppressing grief or experiencing multiple losses all at once, it’s common to feel numb
and go about life in a fog.

This leaves many people unintentionally isolating themselves by telling people they are “OK” as
they don’t believe there’s another option.

When losses add up, it’s important to have a support system and people to talk to like
supportive, close friends and family, all while steering clear of people who tell them to “get
over it.”

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Find your closest friend or family member and let them know you want to begin unravelling
the accumulated grief you’ve experienced. Share with them the individual lives you’re
grieving and ask for their support as you navigate a time you know will bring up intense
waves of emotions.

If you find that a friend or family member is guiding you to avoid your feelings, remember
that it’s perfectly fine to set up boundaries that allow you to feel whatever you’re feeling. If
that means finding another friend or family member to help support you, so be it.

Join a support group.

Name of support group Contact details

During this time of loss, people can feel lonely, lost, and unsure of what should
happen next. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. There are support groups that
bring people going through loss together to work through the pain of loss.

Hire professional help.

Sometimes when individuals experience loss, especially multiple losses at once, it can be
difficult to navigate alone what should be done and how life can continue in such a chaotic
state.

Finding professional help with a grief counselor or therapist is a great option for those experiencing
cumulative grief.

Not only will this person be an unbiased person to share the experience with, but they are
also highly trained to help get people through this challenging part of life.

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WHAT YOU CAN DO:

If you have a therapist you already work with, schedule an appointment with them to
discuss the loss you’re facing and let them know that you’d like to address your grief with
their help and support.

Take time for yourself, self care is important.

One of the easiest things to do during bereavement is to deny self care. However, at this
point, it’s one of the most important things a person can do to help get through the
otherwise impossible time.

Self care can come in many forms and finding the right type will depend on what the individual
enjoys and can help them relax.

However, the basics of drinking water to stay hydrated, eating healthy food to
ensure the body has nutrients, getting 7-8 hours of sleep, and moving the body
to stay healthy should be addressed first.

Then, as the basics are covered, self care may look like:

 Spending time with friends and family

 Getting a massage to help release tension
 Traveling to an old favorite place or somewhere completely new
 Creating art―painting, drawing, making jewelry, etc.
 Playing, singing, or listening to music
 Renovating a part of your home
 Going to the theatre
 Walking, hiking, or climbing in nature
 Writing or journaling
 Sweating in a sauna
 Reading
 Meditating

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Know that whatever you choose to do for your self-care is okay, as long as you’re not relying
on drugs and alcohol as part of your self care. What may work for you may not work for
someone else, and vice versa.

Take time to think about what you enjoy most or simply try a few different options to learn
for yourself what feels good during this time.

Schedule at least a weekly self-care time where you check in with yourself and do
something that helps you relax. If you can work self-care into your daily routine, even
better!

[Link]

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Chapter Four: Looking forward to 2020

New Year Resolutions

We’ve come up with 10 resolutions for 2020 that are easy to stick to and important
when it comes to improving your mental health.

1. Limit your time on social media

Research has shown that social media can negatively impact our mental health, so it
might be worth limiting time on apps or even cutting them out of your life completely
in 2020. Social media can heighten anxiety by increasing your ability to keep up to
date with the activities of other people, which may cause you to develop Fear of
Missing Out (FOMO). This in turn can make you obsess about what other people are
doing – or even make yourself feel bad because you’re not doing that specific thing.
Apps like Instagram only paint a small picture of someone’s life, many of whom only
post the good things and never the bad, but try not to compare your life with others
online. It might be healthier to take a step back from this false sense of reality next
year.

2. Go to bed earlier

Getting an earlier night will help you feel rested the following day – which is more
beneficial to your mental health, as a lack of sleep can heighten anxiety and
irritability. Try turning off your phone an hour before bedtime and not watching
anything on Netflix. Instead, use this hour to relax in your bed without any
distractions. Other ways to help you fall asleep include exercising, avoiding tea and
coffee and not drinking alcohol before bed, as well as only using your bed for sleep
or sex – so that you associate it with these things. Establish a regular, relaxing
bedtime routine that lets you unwind and sends a signal to your brain that it’s time
to sleep.

3. Cut down on drinking

Many people drink more during the holiday season. These substances can be harmful
to both your physical and mental health; alcohol is a depressant which can
negatively affect your mood, and according to Drink Aware, can increase anxiety and
stress. Giving up or cutting down on alcohol could help you sleep better, improve
your mood and save you money. What’s not to love?

4. Exercise more

Try to exercise more Exercise boosts ‘happy hormones’ in the brain known as
endorphins, which will improve your mood and sense of wellbeing. We’re not saying
join a gym and live there, but making small, positive changes can help. Why not try
something soothing like going swimming a couple of times a week or make a plan to
go on a walk or a run in the morning? Engaging in some form of exercise every day,
even if it is just going for a short walk outside, is likely to make you feel better both
physically and mentally.

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5. Practise self-care

Self-care comes in many forms. For some, it’s a nice long bubble bath with a lit
candle and relaxing music. For others, it’s a face mask, chocolate and their favourite
comedy movie. But self-care isn’t just about pampering. It can also be reading a
book, meditating, going for a run or even just saying no to things that you don’t
want to do. Whatever self-care means to you, know that it is not selfish. It’s
important to look after your mental wellbeing in the best way you know how, so
make time for yourself next year.

6. Be more trusting

People who suffer from loneliness or mental health problems such as depression and
anxiety can often isolate themselves from friends and family, according to research
by the Mental Health Foundation. If you’re having a bad time, seek support. Try to
be more trusting and know that there are people who love you and will be there for
you. A coffee with a friend can do wonders for your mental health, and can make
you feel less alone. You may even discover that things aren’t as bad as they seem,
and even if they are, at least you have someone to talk to about it, who will
hopefully understand and try to help.

7. Improve your diet

Try to make an effort to eat better in the New Year. We’re not talking about counting
calories, but rather getting more nutrients such as vitamins, healthy fats, magnesium
– all things that our bodies need and may have a positive effect on your mental
wellbeing. Research has shown that foods which are rich in folic acid like avocado
and spinach and omega-3 acids such as salmon and tuna, can lower stress,
according to the Priory Group. This doesn’t mean that you have to restrict yourself –
just make a conscious effort to eat a healthy balanced diet every day. Try to eat
better

8. Keep a diary

Keeping a diary can help reduce anxiety, according to Psychology Today. Whether
it’s jotting down your thoughts and feelings to get them out of your head or to track
your mood daily, this can provide an outlet to clear your head. Even if you write
everything down and then throw the paper away, it may still help you make sense of
things that have been troubling you.

9. Be more selfish

This isn’t to say that you should make everything about yourself, but next year, be
more selfish by saying no to things you don’t want to do. If you don’t want to go on
a night out, and would rather stay home in your pyjamas in front of the telly, do
that. Tell your friends and family when they have upset you, tell people when they
are being hurtful. Be honest with people about what your feelings and try not to feel
guilty about the fact you might be letting others down. MORE: MENTAL HEALTH
What it's like to suffer with obsessive compulsive disorder throughout pregnancy
What to do if you find yourself in a mental health crisis over New Year's People tell
us the biggest lessons they've learned in 2019

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10. Seek help

If you’re struggling with your mental health, ask for help. See your GP if you are
having a hard time, and if you believe there is something more going on below the
surface, ask to be referred to a mental health professional. Don’t feel embarrassed
about asking for help. Mental illness can be lonely and overwhelming and it can be
hard to cope with it on your own. If you find yourself struggling and your local GP
surgery isn’t open, you can call 111 for advice or go down to A&E, who may be able
to refer you to an on-duty psychiatrist to help you then and there.

[Link]
health-in-2020-11965371/

Summary Am I doing this?

Limit your time on social media
Go to bed earlier
Cut down on drinking
Exercise more
Practice self-care
Be more trusting
Improve your diet
Keep A DIARY
BE MORE SELFISH
Seek help

More…

READ THE FULL ORIGINAL ARTICLE HERE – AND CLICK THE LINKS IN THE ARTICLE

1. Find moments of peace daily — and consider a ‘resolution’ buddy

“My resolution is to look for ways to be less busy overall, but also less busy within
each day,” says Mary Rourke, a psychologist and the Director of Widener University’s
Institute for Graduate Clinical Psychology. “I am aiming to slow down, be more
intentional in every moment, and try to find moments of peace in each day. These
are things I recommend often to clients, and things I strive to do myself (when I
stop to think about it). My resolution is to build in ways each day to stop and think
about it, and hopefully do it more consistently. Not sure yet how I will stick to this
resolution — I am considering enlisting the help of a ‘resolution buddy’ — someone
who shares my goal and with whom I can have regular brief check-ins to discuss
how we are both doing.”

2. Pursue joy over happiness

“I have two resolutions for the new year,” says Monte Drenner, a licensed mental
health counselor. “First, pursue being joyful over being happy. This goal is important
because joy is a constant delight whereas happy is brief and circumstantial. The
second goal is to be more content which is continual satisfaction rather than getting
my emotional state from my surroundings. [My resolutions] are related, which will

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help me be successful. My desire is for my emotional state to be dictated by more
meaningful things in life rather than the momentary annoyances. Growth in one area
will help dictate growth in the other. I plan on sticking to them by meditating on
them daily as well as directing my reading and listening materials towards these
topics.”

3. Treat time like money — on a budget

“The way I budget my money will be the outline on how I budget my time,”
says Shannon Battle, a licensed professional counselor. “I can always make more
money but I can't make more time. You either maximize it or lose it. If you invested
in your education you made sacrifices that deserve to be remunerated. Next
time somebody wants to pick your brain send them an appointment, invite with an
invoice attached.”

4. Be mindful of media consumption

“While I do a good job on carefully selecting food and relationships that nurture me,
I can definitely improve the quality of the media allowed into my psyche,” says Paul
L. Hokemeyer, a licensed marriage and family therapist. “Since the 2016 election, I
have been pulled into the hostility, vulgarity and division that has come to define
American politics. This consumption has left me feeling anxious, depressed, angry
and at times plagued by fear. Moving forward, I'm resolving to only consume media
that supports the narrative of empathy, compassion and understanding — traits that
we need more of in our individual psyches, our relationships, our families and our
country.”

5. Become aware of resistance to change

"I don't make New Year's resolutions to do something new; however, the New Year
does offer me an opportunity to let go of what no longer serves me,” says Dr. James
S. Gordon, MD, founder and executive director of the nonprofit Center for Mind-Body
Medicine. “This year, what I'd like to let go of is my resistance to change. How do I
personally plan to stick with this? By paying attention. When I pay attention, I am
aware of my resistance to change [experiencing]:
 A tightening in my body.
 A narrowing of my understanding.
 A tinge of defensiveness in my voice.

This awareness will help me contribute to the process of accepting change by simply
using these symptoms of resistance as cues to relax and remember that change is in
the order of nature.”

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6. Practice more gratitude

“In this crazy, busy world, it seems far too easy to move onto what's next on my to-
do list without savoring what I've just completed,” says Sharon Saline, a
psychologist. “I'm planning to write three good things about each day in my journal
before bed so I can focus more on the positive and derive greater satisfaction from
my days.

7. Learn new perspectives

"2019 has been such a year of division across the globe, so my resolution for 2020 is
to try and bring back the empathy,” says Clinton Moore, a clinical psychologist. “The
world is a more beautiful place when we connect, so my aim is to learn one new
thing from one new person every week. That means 52 new ways of looking at the
world by the time 2020 is done."

8. Exercise your creative mind

“In the new year I would like to embrace creativity by doing at least one activity
each week in which I create something — big or small,” says Rebecca B. Skolnick,
licensed clinical psychologist. “Exercising the creative part of my brain helps me see
things from different perspectives, process emotions, and generally feel calmer. I
committed to this resolution by signing up for a series of watercolor classes, and I
have a list of museum and gallery exhibits that I would like to attend for inspiration.”

9. Commit to stillness

“This year, I’m committing to 15 minutes of sitting in stillness a day,” says Amie Roe,
a licensed clinical social worker. “Lately I’ve been wishing for more spaciousness in
my life and I think this is an attainable way to create that for myself. I chose 15
minutes because that’s what feels manageable for me. I’m also going to grant myself
tons of flexibility around how, where, and when in the day I sit in stillness. The more
flexible and gracious I am with myself, the more successful I know I’ll be.”

10. Schedule self-care so it actually happens

“As a couple's therapist and discernment counselor, I know that the transition to
parenthood can be hard on a marriage. Which is why I'm really committing to myself
and my marriage in the new year,” says Theresa Herring, a licensed marriage and
family therapist. “I always tell my clients that if you don't schedule it, it won't
happen. So, with my brand new 2020 planner, I am scheduling moms' night outs
with girlfriends, date nights (both going out and staying in!), and an exercise
routine.”

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11. Work smarter, not harder

“My New Year's resolution is to ‘work smarter not harder’,” says Carrie Mead, a
licensed clinical professional counselor. “I am continually working to create a healthy
work-life balance. The reason for this is that I consistently work with people who feel
the pressures and challenges associated with this imbalance and it’s prudent that I
lead by example. To keep myself accountable to this goal, I set my schedule so that
I have ample time for my clients, my family and myself. Including quiet time for
myself is key to creating the harmony I crave. I have witnessed many clients forget
this key component and they continue to struggle with stress, anxiety, exhaustion,
and health issues despite their dedication to change. I schedule my self-care time
the same way I schedule clients or date-nights; it goes on the calendar with
everything else.”

12. Embrace play

“This year, I intend to focus on nurturing my sense of play and curiosity,” says Jo
Eckler, a clinical psychologist. “Every week, if not every day, I will try something
new, finding ways to laugh and/or play. As adults, we can become rigid in our
thinking and feel that life is a boring treadmill. Play reminds us of who we truly are,
who we've always been and gives us permission to be gloriously imperfect and have
no idea what we're doing.”

13. Continue to achieve work/family balance

“This year, I will continue to work on work/family boundaries,” says Lynn Zakeri, a
licensed clinical social worker. I was impacted by Laura Vanderkam's book, ‘I Know
How She Does It’, which got me thinking about all I do in 168 hours a week. I really
[love] my work, and I also really love my family. Each year I am better at managing
the work/family balance but it is hard trying to ‘do it all’. I will continue to remind
myself that doing it all is sometimes simply accepting the best I can do on a given
day.”

14. Make time for nourishing friendships

“As a very busy clinician who talks to clients all day long, the last thing I want to do
at the end of a long day is to chat with people,” says Rita Eichenstein, a therapist
and neuropsychologist. “To that end, research shows the greatest level of health
comes from those who have an active and nourishing group of friends. So, I’ve
already made a list of those who are dear to me, or those who seem interesting.
Instead of the usual ‘let’s meet for coffee’, I’m scheduling hiking, walking, museum
browsing and beach walking together to deepen my friendships.”

28
15. Bring your dream project to life

“My New Year's resolution is to average 500 words of writing, every weekday, until
Thanksgiving,” says Jon Reeves, a clinical psychologist. “I have always wanted to
write a book, but until now have not prioritized consistent writing. I'll stick to it in
three ways: (1) structuring the resolution as specific, concrete daily habits that
accumulate towards the ultimate goal (a book); (2) making it flexible enough to miss
a day and catch up by writing more the next day or on the weekends; and (3)
scheduling an hour for writing every weekday on my calendar. At the end of the
resolution, I'll have about 118,000 words — enough for a book.”

16. Listen more, talk less

“My New Year's resolution is to slow down and listen far more than I speak, at least
a 2:1 ratio in my relationships with both clients and personal relationships,”
says Brent Sweitzer, a licensed professional counselor. “It may seem like an odd
thing for a therapist to say, given that's a crucial part of their job, but I saw the new
‘Mr. Rogers’ movie recently and was so moved to see how the act of listening and
being with another person led to such transformation. By listening attentively to
another person, we convey our love to them. It helps them know that that unseen
part of them is worthy of our attention.”

17. Work on healing everyday

“My New Year's resolution is to do things every single day that foster healing and self
care,” says Shari Botwin, a licensed clinical social worker. “I counsel people who are
recovering from all types of trauma. I am also a childhood sexual abuse survivor. I
need to work on taking the time I need for my own healing and continue to find
balance as a therapist, mama and survivor. I’m going to take in the advice I give to
my patients and work on giving myself more time to have fun and have more
balance in my personal life.”

Read the original article here

29
Summary Am I doing this?
Find moments of peace daily

Pursue joy over happiness

Treat time like money – on a budget

Be mindful of media consumption

Become aware of resistance to change

Practice more gratitude

Learn new perspectives

Exercise your creative mind

Commit to stillness

Schedule self-care so it actually happens

Work smarter, not harder

Embrace play

Continue to achieve work/family balance

Make time for nourishing friendships

Bring your own dream project to life

Listen more, talk less

Work on healing every day

30
Chapter Five: 23 More Resolutions

Make sure you read the original article and click the links to the research

1. Eat more whole foods

One of the easiest and most sustainable ways to improve overall health is to eat
more whole foods.

Whole foods, including vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, whole grains, and fish, contain
a plethora of nutrients that your body needs to function at an optimal level.

Research shows that following a whole-foods-based diet may significantly reduce

heart disease risk factors, body weight, and blood sugar levels, as well as decrease
your risk of certain diseases, such as type 2 diabetes (1Trusted Source, 2Trusted
Source, 3Trusted Source)

What’s more, adding more whole foods to your diet can be done slowly and
consistently. For example, if you’re not used to eating vegetables, start by adding
one serving of your favorite veggie to your diet every day.

2. Sit less and move more

Whether it’s due to having a sedentary job or simply being inactive, many people sit
more than they should. Sitting too much can have negative effects on health. In fact,
it may be linked to an increased risk of overall mortality (4Trusted Source).

Making a resolution to sit less is an easy and attainable resolution that can be
tailored to fit your lifestyle.

For example, if you have a desk job that requires long periods of sitting, make a
resolution to go for a 15-minute walk at lunch or to get up and walk for 5 minutes
every hour.

3. Cut back on sweetened beverages

Cutting back on sweetened beverages is a smart idea considering that sugary drinks
are linked to an increased risk of obesity, fatty liver, heart disease, insulin resistance,
and cavities in both children and adults (5Trusted Source, 6Trusted Source, 7Trusted
Source, 8Trusted Source, 9Trusted Source).

Though quitting sweetened beverages cold turkey is always an option, gradually

minimizing your intake may help you kick your sugary drink habit for good.

31
4. Get more quality sleep

Sleep is an essential part of overall health, and sleep deprivation can lead to serious
consequences. For instance, lack of sleep may increase your risk of weight gain,
heart disease, and depression (10Trusted Source, 11Trusted Source, 12Trusted
Source).

There are many reasons why people don’t get enough sleep, so it’s important to
focus on your schedule and lifestyle to determine the best ways to improve sleep
quantity and quality.

Decreasing screen time before bed, reducing light pollution in your bedroom, cutting
back on caffeine, and getting to bed at a reasonable hour are some simple ways to
improve sleep hygiene (13Trusted Source, 14Trusted Source).

5. Find a physical activity that you enjoy

Every New Year, people purchase expensive memberships to gyms, workout studios,
and online fitness programs in hopes of shedding excess body fat in the year to
come. Though most people start strong, the majority don’t make their new routine
into a lasting habit.

Still, you can increase the chances of making your fitness resolutions stick. To get
started, choose an activity based on enjoyment and whether it fits into your
schedule.

For example, taking a half-hour walk, jog, or bike ride before work, or swimming at a
gym that’s on your way home, are simple and sustainable exercise resolutions.

Then, set an attainable goal, such as planning to walk a few specific days per week
instead of aiming for every day.

Making a more realistic goal can enhance the chances of making your new routine
last, especially if you’re new to working out.

6. Take more ‘me time’ and practice self-care

Taking time for yourself is not selfish. In fact, it’s imperative for optimal health and
wellbeing. This is especially true for those in caretaker roles, such as parents and
healthcare workers (15Trusted Source, 16Trusted Source).

For people with busy schedules and limited time, making a resolution to engage
in self-care may take some planning. However, it’s well worth the time investment.

Self-care doesn’t have to be elaborate or time consuming. It can simply mean taking
a bath every week, attending your favorite weekly yoga class, preparing a healthy
meal for yourself, going for a walk in nature, or getting an extra hour of sleep.

32
7. Cook more meals at home

Research shows that people who cook more meals at home have better diet quality
and less body fat than people who eat more meals on the go (17Trusted Source).

In fact, a study in 11,396 adults found that those who ate 5 or more home-cooked
meals per week were 28% less likely to be overweight, compared with those who ate
fewer than 3 home-cooked meals per week (17Trusted Source).

Start by making one meal a day, then increase the frequency over time until you’re
making the majority of your meals and snacks at home.

8. Spend more time outside

Spending more time outdoors can improve health by relieving stress, elevating
mood, and even lowering blood pressure (18Trusted Source).

Making a New Year’s resolution to spend more time outside every day is a
sustainable and healthy goal that can benefit most everyone, no matter where you
live.

Taking a walk outside during your lunch break, hiking on weekends, going camping
with friends, or simply soaking in the beauty of your backyard or local park are all
ways to incorporate nature into your daily routine.

9. Limit screen time

Many people depend on their phones and computers for work and entertainment.
However, spending too much time on electronic devices — particularly on social
media — has been linked to depression, anxiety, and loneliness in some studies
(19Trusted Source, 20Trusted Source, 21Trusted Source).

Setting a resolution to cut back on the time you spend scrolling through social media,
watching TV, or playing computer games may help boost your mood and enhance
productivity.

10. Try meditation

Meditation is an evidence-based way to promote mental well-being. It may be

particularly helpful for people who have anxiety or depression (22Trusted
Source, 23Trusted Source).

Trying out this practice is a perfect New Year’s resolution because there are many
ways to meditate, and it’s easy to find books, podcasts, and apps that teach you how
to start a meditation practice.

33
11. Rely less on convenience foods

Many people rely on convenience foods, such as packaged chips, cookies, frozen
dinners, and fast food, for a quick meal or snack. Though these items may be tasty
and readily available, they can have detrimental effects on your health if eaten too
often.

For example, frequent fast food intake is associated with poor overall diet quality,
obesity, and an increased risk of numerous conditions, including heart disease and
diabetes (24Trusted Source).

To cut back on your consumption of convenience foods, make a resolution to

prepare more meals at home using healthy ingredients.

12. Stop dieting

Chronic dieting is harmful to both physical and mental health. Plus, most people who
lose weight through restrictive dieting regain up to two-thirds of the weight lost
within 1 year (25Trusted Source, 26Trusted Source, 27Trusted Source, 28Trusted
Source).

Dieting can also make it harder to lose weight in the future.

Rather than setting a New Year’s resolution to lose weight by using restrictive
measures, such as a fad diet, try a healthier, more sustainable method of weight
loss by focusing on increasing physical activity and eating healthier foods.

13. Go grocery shopping regularly

Having a well-stocked pantry and fridge is necessary to prepare healthy, home-

cooked meals.

If you’re not used to going grocery shopping, make a New Year’s resolution to go to
the supermarket or farmer’s market more regularly to stock up on nutritious
ingredients.

Depending on your schedule, it may be helpful to designate 1 day each week as your
day to shop. Ensuring that you have time to buy the groceries you need to make
tasty, nourishing meals is a savvy way to improve your diet quality.

14. Use healthier household products

It’s obvious that what you put into your body can significantly impact your health.
However, what you choose to put onto your body and what products you use in your
home matter, too (29Trusted Source).

34
Make a New Year’s resolution to purchase more natural beauty products, household
cleaners, laundry detergents, and personal care products to create a healthier
environment for yourself and your family.

15. Add more produce to your diet

Adding more cooked and raw vegetables and fruits to your diet can go a long way
towards improving your health in the new year.

Numerous studies have shown that eating a diet rich in produce helps protect
against various illnesses, such as diabetes, heart diseases, certain cancers, and
obesity, as well as overall mortality (30Trusted Source, 31Trusted Source).

16. Cut back on alcohol

Though alcohol can certainly fit into a healthy diet, imbibing too often can negatively
affect your health. What’s more, drinking alcohol frequently may keep you from
reaching your health and wellness goals (32Trusted Source).

If you think cutting back on alcohol may be helpful for you, set a reasonable goal to
keep yourself on track, such as limiting drinking to weekend nights only or setting a
drink limit for the week.

If you need a non-alcoholic beverage idea to replace your usual cocktail of choice,
try fruit-infused sparkling water, kombucha, or one of these fun mocktails.

17. Be more present

Research shows that being more present may improve life satisfaction by decreasing
negative thoughts, which may thereby improve psychological health (33Trusted
Source, 34Trusted Source).

Making a New Year’s resolution to be more mindful and present may help you feel
more content in your everyday life.

Spending less time on your phone, stopping to notice your environment, and
listening intently to others are simple ways to be more present.

18. Take a vacation

Taking a vacation — even a short one — may have significant and immediate
positive effects on stress levels and may enhance well-being (35Trusted Source).

In the new year, make a resolution to take a vacation with friends or family
members, or on your own. Whether you travel to an area you’ve always wanted to
visit or simply plan a staycation at home, taking some time for rest and relaxation is
important for health.
35
19. Try a new hobby

It’s common for adults to let once-loved hobbies fall by the wayside as they get older
due to busy schedules or lack of motivation.

However, research shows that partaking in a hobby that you love can help you live a
longer, healthier life (36Trusted Source).

Make a resolution to try out a hobby that you’ve always been interested in — or pick
back up a hobby that used to bring you joy.

20. Stop negative body talk

Talking negatively about your body can lead to feelings of body shame. In fact,
research shows that engaging in and hearing negative body talk is associated with
higher levels of body dissatisfaction and decreased self-esteem in both women and
men (37Trusted Source, 38Trusted Source, 39Trusted Source).

Make a healthy New Year’s resolution to engage in positive self-talk regularly and
reduce negative body talk. This may not only help improve your relationship with
your own body but also encourage others to stop talking negatively about
themselves.

21. Visit your doctor

Getting examined regularly by your healthcare practitioner is important for many

reasons. Having regular blood work and necessary screenings can help spot potential
problems before they turn into something more serious.

Though your pace of doctor’s visits depends on many things, including the type of
medical care, your age, and your medical history, most experts recommend seeing
your primary care physician at least once a year for a checkup.

22. Take care of your teeth

Maintaining your oral health is a New Year’s resolution idea that can and should be
sustained for life.

Brushing and flossing your teeth regularly can help prevent oral conditions like gum
disease and bad breath (40Trusted Source).

What’s more, some research suggests that gum disease may be associated with
serious health conditions, such as Alzheimer’s and heart disease, making oral care all
the more important (41Trusted Source).

In addition to regular brushing and flossing, most dentists recommend a checkup

and cleaning at least once a year (42Trusted Source).

36
23. Create a sustainable, nourishing diet

You may be making a resolution to eat healthier or lose weight year after year
because you’re prioritizing short-term changes over long-term health benefits.

Instead of making a plan to follow yet another restrictive fad diet, this New Year,
make a resolution to break the dieting cycle and create a sustainable, nourishing
eating pattern that works for you.

The healthiest diet is one that’s rich in whole, nutrient-dense foods and low in
heavily processed, sugary products. A healthy, long-term diet should not only be
nutritious but also adaptable, meaning you can follow it for life — no matter the
circumstances.

A sustainable eating pattern can be maintained on vacation, during holidays, and at

parties because it’s unrestrictive and suited to your lifestyle. Check out this
beginners’ guide to healthy eating to get started.

[Link]
line

37
Steps (Make sure you read the original Do I do this?
article)

Eat more whole foods

Sit less and move more

Cut back on sweetened beverages

Get more quality sleep

Find a physical activity that you enjoy

Practice self-care

Cook more meals at home

Spend more time outside

Limit screen time

Meditate

Rely less on convenience foods

Stoop dieting

Go grocery shopping

Use healthier household products

Add more produce to your diet

Cut back on alcohol

Be more present

Take a vacation

Try a new hobby

Stop negative body talk

Visit your doctor

Take care of your teeth

Create a sustainable nourishing diet

38
10 Healthier New Year's Resolutions

The new year is the perfect time for a healthier change. New Year’s resolutions don’t
have to be strict rules, sacrifices, or all-or-nothing guidelines. Instead of common
New Year’s resolutions, try these healthier alternatives.

Instead of “Lose Weight”

Try “Balance Health”

One of the most popular New Year’s resolutions is to lose weight, but having that as
the goal may not be the best way to achieve good overall health. Try to aim for
balancing your health. Start at the foundations of a healthy lifestyle, including
nutrition, exercise, and emotional well-being. Quit smoking and kick bad habits. Once
you ease your way into a healthy lifestyle, it may become easier for you to lose that
excess weight. Talk with your doctor about what you can do to get your health back
on track.

Instead of “Give Up Junk Food”

Try “Make A Healthy Swap”

It can be difficult to give up junk food all at once, and sometimes it can lead to a
junk food binge later on. Depriving your body of certain foods all at once can make
your body crave it even more. Instead, whenever you start reaching for that bag of
potato chips, swap it for low-salt, unbuttered popcorn. Instead of having a can of
soda, swap it for fruit juice with no added sugar. Feel free to indulge in a bit of dark
chocolate or snack on some pretzels every now and then, but each time you make a
healthier swap, your body will thank you for it.

Instead of “Train for Marathon”

Try “Start Jogging”

Setting large goals for the new year is a great way to get motivated, but if you are
looking for a lifestyle change, starting off with smaller steps might be the best way
to go. Beginning with intense physical activity can be harmful to an unconditioned
body, and the lack of quick goal attainment can be discouraging. Speak to your
doctor about what physical activity is best for you, especially if you have any chronic
conditions. The recommended amount of exercise is at least thirty minutes of
moderate physical activity a day. All you need is the right program and preparation.

Instead of “An Apple a Day Keeps the Doctor Away”

Try “Make Regular Appointments”

Going to the doctor for your annual health exam is one of the best forms of
preventive care. Even if you feel fine, there could be underlying conditions that can
increase your risk of illness. Make an appointment to get a mammogram, have your
prostate checked, or make sure your blood pressure is controlled. Take care of your
health for the new year and make an appointment today.

39
Instead of “Take On More”

Try “Simplify”

It may seem like a good idea to dive into the new year by checking as many things
off your list as you can and staying one step ahead of your busy schedule, but it may
not be the best idea for your mental health. Negative responses to stress can lead to
major health problems, including an increased risk of heart disease. Sometimes it is
better to take a step back and prioritize, let go of certain pressures, and take time
for yourself. Manage your stress and declutter your thoughts by taking a walk,
listening to music, or practicing yoga. Decide what is necessary to devote your time
to and put a hold on the rest.

Instead of “Make Lots of New Friends”

Try “Stay in Touch with Old Friends”

Building a social support network is essential to maintaining good health. While

making new friends is great, one thing to keep in mind is quality over quantity.
Making shallow relationships with a large number of people may not do as much
good as having deep relationships with a few people. Keep in touch with those who
matter most to you. Schedule time to speak face-to-face rather than just “liking” a
post on social media. Make meaningful connections and benefit from the physical
power of social support.

Instead of “Limit TV Time”

Try “Read More”

Instead of taking away certain pleasures or setting limits on what you can do, try
making a positive twist to your resolution. Rather than establishing what you cannot
do with your time, make a promise to engage in other positive activities. Make a
resolution to spend some time each day reading, walking your dog, or learning a
new language. This will leave less time for you to engage in other activities like
sitting down watching television.

Instead of “Get Rid of Wrinkles”

Try “SPF”

Sticking to a beauty routine with the latest anti-aging products is not the best way to
care for the future of your skin. The best way to prevent skin damage is to wear
sunscreen with an SPF of at least 15 daily. Whenever your skin is exposed to the
sun’s harmful rays, your risk of skin cancer and premature aging increases. You can
still keep up with your regular skincare routine, but we definitely recommend
following sun safety tips.

Instead of “Save Money”

Try “Spend Wisely”

If you decide to save money for your New Year’s resolution, make sure you are
saving up for something in particular. Instead of being more money-conscious just to
have cash, try looking into purchases that invest in your health. Save up for a much-

40
needed vacation or spend that money on a spin class membership. If you have the
disposable income, you have the option to use it to take care of your health.

Instead of “Better Yourself”

Try “Help Others”

It is always good to take care of yourself, and you can also benefit from taking care
of others. Volunteering can give you a sense of purpose in life and boost your mental
health. Volunteer at CHI St. Luke’s Health or visit residents at the nursing home. No
matter how you wish to help, taking the time to create healthier communities
benefits everyone.

[Link]
resolutions

41
Chapter Six : Finally….

As a reward for getting to the end…only valid for a very very short time…

Free course

Another free course

And another

One for the economic students

Real World….

Dogonomics

Hygge for the 2020s

Lagom

Business

Depression

Business Certificate

Health

Dramatherapy

Cope with old age

42