Scene 1

Reporter - Hum log aaye hai babuji ke banglow pe.. Dekhte hai unka kya kehna hai..

Babuji, apne state me ab tak ki sab se badi baadh ayi hai.. Us bare me apka kya kehna hai?

Babuji - idhar humari bivi hamari sunti nahi hai, Bhuk laga hai, khana bana do, kahe to 2
thappad khilati hai.. Aur tum humko puch rahe ho ki humara kehna kya hai?

R- Babuji, Bivi aur baadh do alag alag bate hai, Unka ek dusre se kya hi sambandh?

B - apni bivi bahut khatrnak hoti hai, Itna to mante ho?

R - Apni bivi? Apki alag hai meri alag hai...

B - are vahi.. Kisi ki bhi ho, Khtrnaak to hoti hi hai na...

P1- Hamari bivi ke liye to aur bhi khatrnak naam dhundna padego..

P2 - Hamari bivi ne muh khola nahi ke aag ka gola bahar nikal ke ata hai..

P1- Matbal?

P2 - Galti se bhi kuch iyya uvva bol diye to, humre peeche belan liye daudti hai...

P1 - Fir to tumri haalat iyya uvva ho jati hogi..

R - Maine babuji se sawal pucha hai to babuji hi jawaab denge.

B - Dekhiye baadh yaani...

P1 - Bahut Buri baat hai... (babuji ka look) Sorry.

B - Ab badh ayi barabar?

R - Barabar

B - To ab uske bare me..

P2 - Kya hi kare ab jo ho gaya so ho gaya...

(babuji Look) babuji ab aap hi boliye.. Hum kya hi bolenge...

B - to hum kaha the?

R - Badh aur bivi ka kya connection hai?

B - Baadh aur bivi dono hi...

P1 - Vaat lagati hai.. Barabar na babuji...

B- Ab yaha se niklo varna vaat laga denge tumhari...Interview humara hai ya tumhara?

R- aap boliye..

B - To hum keh rahe the...

C - Thoda jor se boliye...

B - Bivi jab bol bol ke kano ka kachumbar bana deti hai, to kaano se khun aur akho se baadh
nikal ke aati hai..

C - Thoda dheere boliye.. Ab aapke muh se baadh aa rahi hai...

B - Tum pehle kuch ek decide karo.. Dheere bole ya jor se.. ekdum humari bivi jaise ho tum...

R - Babuji aapki bivi ko thoda side me rakhiye...

B - Kiske side me?

R - (frustrated) kisike nahi.. Aap ka is vishay me goal kya hai?

B - Dekho bhai ye goal voal sab football me hota hai... Aur humko football ka CH bhi nahi
ata.. Hum kaha se goal kare bhai?

C - Football me CH nahi FA hota hai...

B - Ab humko kaha pata hum to bas Gilli Danda khele hai...

C - ( to himself) Usi dande se maar maar ke apki dhoti geeli karni chahiye...

B - Kya bole? (confused) (did'nt hear it properly)

R - Are pure sheher me paani bhar chuka hai.. Aap MLA reh chuke hai is shahar ke.. Apka kuch
to kehna hoga..

B - Paani hi hai jeevan, Kariye uska sevan, aur humare bunglow ka naam hai BABU BHAVAN...

R - Aap ki baadh ke bare me kya ray hai vo bataiye (frustrated)

B - Baadh pehle bhi aati thi Ab bhi aa rahi hai usme naya kya hai...

C- are yar Camera Roll karna hi reh gaya..

R - Chhod na.. Vaise bhi kaha IMP bola vo...

C- Election ke time pe to bade bade bhashan karte firenge, in issues ke bare me pucho to
bato ko ghumate hai..

C - Vohi to ata hai unko... Chal kahi aur jagah puchte hai...

Scene 2

M1 - Did you hear about some floods somewhere? I don't remember where exactly but I
heard it was the massive flood.

M2 - No man... If something more massive happened, then it was the Royal wedding of
Ambanis.

M3 - yah man.. Justne bieber was paid whooping 80 Cr.

M1 - Lets go Lets go. Train has come.

Continued-

R - Namashkar, Bihaar me sab se badi baadh aayi hai, Logo ki jaane gayi hai, Khana tak
naseeb nahi ho raha, Log sadak par aa chuke hai, aaapki kya raay hai?

M1 - Already office ke liye late ho chuka hoon, Usme aap aur late mat kijiye..

R - Aap is shehar ke jagruk naagrik hai.. Aap us lihaaj se to boliye..

M1 - Mai kon hoon aur mujhe kya karna chahiye ye aap mujhe mat sikhaiye..

C - Aap TV pe live ho..

M1 - Tu camera band karega ya me band karu...

M2 - Are nahi nahi camera band mat kijiye.. Ham dikh rahe hai kya TV pe..
C - Ha vo bhi live

M2 - Mujhe puchiye me javab dunga..

R - Bihaar me sab se badi badh ayi hai.. kya aap un logo ki halat samajh sakte ho.. aap us
situation me hote to kya hota....

M2 - Me to mast badh me dubki laga ke swimming karta.. Bohot saal pehle humare gaav me
badh ayi thi.. Chhota tha to kisi ne bahar jaane nahi diya..

R - hum abhi ke baadh ke bare me aap se puh rahe hai...

M2 - Are aap suno to.. Bachpan se muzhe swimming pasand hai..

W - Mujhe bhi.. ( suddenly she sees camera and enters in the TV scene.)

M2 - Nadi, talaab, Kua, har jagah pe swimming ki hai..

W - Maine bhi

M2 - Mera to sapna tha.. ek din me tair ke badh me sab ki jaane bachaunga..

W - Mera bhi..

M2 - Ek kaam kijiye aap hi boiye..

W - Mujhe chalega. Piche hatiye (Pushes him behind)

M2 - Me pehle aya hoon, Aap baad me ayiye..

W - Lekin maine unhe pehle dekha hai

M2 - Sabse pehle me aya hoon to me hi Bolunga...

W - But ladies First na..

C - Are zagda mat kijiye aap lo TV pe live ho.. Sab log dekh rahe hai apko Zagadte hue..

(now they both act very sophisticated and well mannered)

W - Aapko kya lagta haihum log zagad rahe hai?

P2 - Are hum to bohot achhe friends hai... Pata hai hum log sath me kaha mile hai?

W - School

P2 - College

W - College
P2 - School

C - Aaplog kahi pe bhi mile ho, Yaha mat zagda karo..

W - Hum bilkul zagad nahi rahe.. Aap pehle baat kijiye..

P2 - Ladies First na.

W - Aaj Gents First.

Random middle class Corporate office Guy - Kya chal raha hai yaha aap logo ka.. Yaha
already train late hai.. Aur usme aap dono ki bakbak.. Badh jaisi serious situation hai... Logo
ki maut hui hai... Bachhe anath hue hai, logo ke ghar nahi rahe.. aur aap logo ko kuch farak
bhi padta hai? Humanity naam ki koi cheez hoti hai...Hai aap logo me? Vaha hazaro logo ka
nuksaan hua hai aur aapne us baat ko mazaak samajh rakha hai?

Scene 3

R - Hum hai gandhi Street pr.. Dekhte hai logo ka kya kehna hai flood ke bare me..

Hello ma'am, Abhi recent flood ke bare me apka kya kehna hai ?

G1 - Yess Japan me Tsunami aya... bohot bura hua.. Japan ka bohot Nuksan hua..

R - Bihaar me jo hadsa hua hai us baare me puch raha hoon

G1 - Achha Bihaar me Tsunami ayi hai kya?

R - Ye kya baate kar rahi hai aap? Apne desh ke Bihaar me baadh ayi hai.. Log mar rahe hai,
Logo ka nukaan hua hai... Aur apka alag hi Tsunami Stunami chal raha hai..

G1 - Are tuze kahi jaana tha na.. (with embarrassment that she does not know about what
sad thing happened in our own country)

R ( To other Girl) - At least aap bata sakti hai?

G2 - Han

G1 - Nahi

G2 - Hann... Chillati hai lekin G1 use kheech ke le jati hai...

Scene 4