Enhancing the Feelings of Positive Emotions in Emotionally Abused

People.

Positive Psychology

PSYC 324

B.A. (Hons.) APPLIED PSYCHOLOGY

Submitted By

MAHEK DOSHI

Enrollment No: A91306920158

Batch: 2020-2023

Faculty Guide

Dr. Malabika Tripathi

Amity institute of Psychology and Allied Sciences

AMITY UNIVERSITY KOLKATA

May,2022
 Index

1. Introduction ……………………………………….…………… 3

2. Methodology …………………………………………………… 3

3. Literature Review ……………………………………………… 4

4. Implications …………………………………………………….. 6

5. Interventions ……………………………………………………. 7

6. Conclusions …………………………………………………… 11

7. References ……………………………………………………. 11
 Introduction

Abuse is the mistreatment of power that intentionally harms or injures another person.. It is
when one purposefully does something to harm the other, be it physically or emotionally. All
types of abuse, be it physical, mental, sexual, or emotional causes pain and psychological
distress, in not just the victim but sometimes also on the abuser too.

A person who is subjected to emotional abuse, either as a child or within a relationship, are more
likely to not trust people in the future, leading to trust issues. 9/10 times the victims blame
themselves, although it is never their fault.

Emotional abuse is generally seen to be overlooked, when in fact, it is the most dangerous of
them all. The problem with abusive people is that they always think they are right and most
times, the victims do not even think that they are being abused. Words are like a sharp sword.
Once the sword pieces a person, the harm is already done and no amount of apologies can repent
for them. An emotional scar can haunt a person forever, and may never heal no matter how much
love would be streamed on it. This form of abuse can show up as verbal abuse, passive
aggression, gas lighting, or social isolation.

Methodology
8 research papers and 4 journal articles have been collected from different sources of e-library.

● Google scholar
● PubMed
 ● Ncbi
● Researchgate
● [Link]
● Sage journals
● [Link]

Keywords:- emotional abuse, interpersonal aggression, suicide attempt, psychological disorder,

mental health, adult social behavior, intimate partner violence, positive emotions, self-efficacy,
happiness.

Literature Review

The effects of physical abuse are more-or-less obvious like a black eye, a cut or a bruise, but the
effects of emotional abuse may be harder to spot. Emotionally abusive people can affect work,
school, mood and other vital areas of life. One cannot stress enough how the effects of emotional
abuse can be just as severe as those from physical abuse.

Even worse, the victims of emotional abuse are more likely to blame themselves and downplay
their abuse, claiming that it was "just" emotional and that "at least he/she didn't beat me."
However, minimizing adult emotional abuse will neither alleviate or disguise its deadly
consequences.

Emotional abuse may take the form of verbal abuse. Verbal abusers use words or other
several intonations to terrify or emotionally harm others. Yelling, name-calling, intimidating, and
threatening are just a few examples of verbal abuse. For instance, "When one tells their spouse
they desire a divorce, the other threatens to sue for full custody of the children,"

Emotional abuse may also take the form of passive aggression. Passive-aggressive
individuals employ indirect methods to express their negative feelings toward the target. "The
spouse suddenly won't hold their partner's hand or touch them," for instance, or "the husband
starts sleeping with his back facing his wife indirectly indicate his displeasure."

Social Isolation. Social isolation is the third kind of emotional abuse. This type of abuse is
designed to prevent one from socializing with others, thus potentially making them feel lonely
and depressed. For instance, “The wife informs her husband's friends and relatives that the
latter was unstable and that the friends and relatives should avoid contacting the husband for a
time."

Gas lighting. The fourth type of emotional abuse is gas lighting. Gas lighting is a covert form of
abuse that denies what one feels they know with certainty, thus making them question their
senses, judgments, and sanity.
For instance, “When the husband was not looking, the wife intentionally drops his phone,
cracking the screen and then blaming it on the husband saying how she saw him dropping it on
the floor herself”.

Emotional abusers generally use words and behaviors to frighten someone or cause emotional
pain or distress without physically assaulting them. While some abusers may derive pleasure
from one’s suffering, they may also use abuse to obtain something they can't otherwise get. In
other words, the abusers use well-crafted words to manipulate the victim to do things according
to them.

The manipulation is done in such a sweet and unharmful manner, that most often even the victim
gets tricked and remains unknown to the real truth behind said words. For example, a 15-year old
girl had a very caring mother, who helped her in her school work and motivated her in winning
various championships. But, the girl never wished to even take part in the said championships; it
was the mother who made her do them. What was not instantly noticeable was the way the
mother said some words deliberately in a manner, to make her daughter docile. Her mother
usually manipulated her daughter by threatening to kill herself, by eating all the sleeping pills,
unless the daughter agrees with her. Later, the mother would always manipulate her daughter by
saying things like, “When I’m dead, you will be all alone because your father doesn’t want you.
You know that, right?” causing the daughter to believing that she would be nothing without her
mother and that she should be thankful for whatever her mother does.

Emotional abusers tilt the power balance in the relationship, entering into a position of
"authority", wherein they believe (and most often do so as well) they control the other person
entirely, in a way ‘own’ them, and it is the “Authority’s” decision of what the other can do, eat,
dress, and most often talk to. Abusers train the others to treat them with deference and respect,
which means that they have to behave as if they were in a position of authority relative to the
victim. To respect their "authority," the other must follow their orders and requests or meet their
desires and needs.

Emotional abuse may occur in a variety of situations, including those involving romantic
partners, friends, siblings, ex-spouses, coworkers, neighbors’, elderly and their caretakers, and so
on.

Emotional abuse affects almost everyone. Even a control freak may run into someone who is
more power-hungry or skilled at employing devious abuse methods.
Physical wounds may heal in time, but scars on memories are hard to remove. Calling names,
grounding children for illogical reasons, verbally abusing them, yelling at them, degrading them
in front of people, etc., all of these eventually lead the individual to self-doubt, and feel like they
are not enough.

Implications

The victim of emotional abuse may find it difficult to accept the abuse.
They may first be unaware that the person with whom they are in a relationship is emotionally
abusive, and once they do they start feeling:-
• shame\s
• hopelessness\s
• fear\s
• Confusion
They may begin to experience some bodily symptoms of the abuse while they deal with the
emotional ramifications. Among these impacts are:

• Irritability-aches and pains

• Inability to concentrate
• Muscular tightness

The longer emotional abuse is allowed to persist, the longer these consequences might last.
A person may also experience the following consequences in addition to the ones listed above:

• Guilt
•anxiety
• Sleeplessness
• Chronic pain
• Social isolation or loneliness

Interventions

Abuse can create psychological scars that are more difficult to repair than physical ones. Long
after the assault has stopped, survivors of abuse may experience deep, unpleasant sentiments.
People who have been abused frequently endure anxiety, flashbacks, and trust concerns. It has
the potential to affect a person's capacity to develop connections and achieve happiness.

The consequences of abuse, however, do not have to be permanent. A therapist can assist
survivors of abuse in overcoming obstacles and addressing symptoms. Abusers can also benefit
from therapy to help them quit abusing others, but they must sincerely want to change.

Abuse is a difficult problem to solve alone. Support is, fortunately, offered. People can get
support from a mental health expert to assess and leave such harmful environments. In
counseling sessions, survivors of abuse can work through their unpleasant feelings and
recollections of the abuse.
Rebuilding self-esteem is a common goal in therapy. Abuse almost always, breaks one’s
confidence, and it becomes extremely important to increase one’s self-efficacy. Cognitive-
behavioral therapy (CBT) can help one, to challenge unrealistic expectations of them.
Experiential techniques such as art, music and dance therapy can also boost confidence.

Group therapy has demonstrated effectiveness in helping survivors. Social support can help
one cope with any stigma they may have encountered. Talking with others who have similar
experiences can help one feel less isolated.

Though emotional abuse can happen in any relationship, in India it is mostly seen in the cases of
domestic violence, wherein the wife is emotionally blackmailed or criticized. Most often, people
tend to dismiss emotional abuse, believing it is to be a normal part of life, and only acknowledge
it when it becomes a larger issue, such as domestic violence.

The first step to seeking emotional abuse therapy is admitting and accepting that they are stuck in
an abusive relationship. Once an individual identifies any aspect of the emotional abuse, it’s
important to accept it and seek out a therapist. Once the person is honest about what they’re
going through, they can start taking control of their own life by seeking therapy for emotional
abuse.

Some self-help methods for coping with abuse are:-

Making oneself a priority:

Whether it’s mental or physical health, one needs to make themselves a priority. One can start by
stopping to worry about pleasing or seeking validation from their abuser, taking care of their own
needs, and doing something that will help them think positive thoughts and affirm who they are.

Creating boundaries:
This can be done only when one becomes stern with their abuser and they have to sternly tell
them that they cannot yell at them, call them names, insult them, or be rude to them.
For instance, one can inform their abuser that if they continue to abuse them in any manner, they
will end the conversation and leave the room. However, they must also follow through with their
set boundaries.

Admitting to oneself that they can’t fix them:

No matter how hard a person may try, they can never fix another broken person. One cannot
change an emotional abuser by doing something different or by trying something different. The
abuser behaves negatively by choice, and the victim needs to keep reminding themselves that it
isn’t their fault. The only thing one can do is fix or control one’s responses to said actions.

Building a support network:

Many therapists have stated how one must talk to a trusted family member, friend, or even a
counselor about what they are going through. The victim must take time away from their abuser
and spend it with people who love and support them. But putting a distance between oneself and
the abuser does not mean isolating oneself, because that will deteriorate one’s mental health
more severely. Isolating oneself from everyone makes one trapped in their mind, thinking,
thinking and thinking continuously about the all the bad things happening in life, blaming
oneself again for the actions, and overall plunging oneself deep into a pool of self-loathing,
which can lead to major depression or even in some cases, suicidal tendencies. A healthy
network of loved ones helps one speak out the truth and gain some much-needed perspective.

Although all the above points are some steps that emotionally abused people can take, to cope
with said abuse they face. The best and most effective step/solution to the problem would be to
get out of the situation itself. An emotionally abused person would continuously feel
disheartened, sad, and experience negative emotions as they are stuck in the abusive relationship.
Breaking off the relationship at least cuts the continuous oncoming source of abuse, and it
becomes incredibly easier for the survivor to recover from it now, rather than from the situation
before.
Enhancing positive emotions in these survivors is a critical stage in the treatment process. The
first thing, to do is to make them stop blaming themselves, and make them see how the abuse
was not and never will be their fault. At the initial stage, it is difficult for them to understand this
point, but as time goes on, their treatment progresses, and they not only understand the reasoning
behind the fact but also accept it.

The next stage is to teach them how to live again, because abuse generally drains not just the
positive emotions out of a person, but also the life out of the victims. To live again, find
happiness in one’s environment, interact with others (not just family or friends, but also with
strangers or meeting new people), and go out and in short live for oneself, and not for others.

Finding happiness is the major step in enhancing positive emotions, and this stage is not just
limited to the people who have left the abuse in their past, but can also become a daily happiness
exercise for those who are still stuck in the situation. The stage is basically where an individual
has to make note of every small event that made the person feel happy. It may be someone
helping them out with something or just simple things like gentle breezy weather. Finding
happiness in small things, makes a person see how their life is not just filled with black spots, but
also has little rays of sunshine seeping through the cracks of the door. An increasing sense of
happiness is the most effective way of enhancing positive emotions, as once a person is happy,
they feel energized, and are more open to adapting to an optimistic view of the world, having
hope for the future, and most importantly have faith again in love.

Conclusion

All forms of abuse revolve on the abuser's desire for power and control over his or her victims.
Emotional abuse is any type of non-physical abuse inflicted on another individual. Emotional
abuse victims are repeatedly threatened, manipulated, intimidated, and isolated, leading to
feelings of worry, dread, self-blame, and worthlessness. They may believe that no one else cares
about them. They often stay in abusive environments because they think they have no other
options. Emotional violence, in contrast to physical violence, is difficult to detect since it is not
visible. Physical violence can occasionally follow emotional abuse. It is linked to a range of
negative psychosocial outcomes like adult depression, suicidal tendencies, anxiety, dissociation
and excessive drug and alcohol use among people. Adult depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety,
detachment, and excessive drug and alcohol use are among the poor psychosocial effects
connected to it. The victim’s life becomes void of any and every positive emotions, which leads
to depression, and the main element involved in the treatment process, involves enhancing
positive emotions.

References
Briggs, F., & Hawkins, R. (2020). ‘Emotional Abuse’. 10.4324/9781003134701-2.

Brogaard B.(2022) ‘5 Reasons People Emotionally Abuse Others’, Psychology Today.

Goldsmith, R., & Freyd, J. (2005). Awareness for Emotional Abuse. Journal of

Emotional Abuse. 5. 95-123. 10.1300/J135v05n01_04.

cadabam Hospital. 2022. ‘Psychological therapy for mental health & family in

Bangalore’. [online] Available at: <[Link]

emotional-abuse-therapist-for-emotional-abuse-in-bangalore/

[Link]. 2022. ‘Therapy for Abuse Survivors, Survivors of Abuse’. [online]

Available at: <[Link]

Krumins, G. (2011). ‘The Detrimental Effects Of Emotional Abuse’. Bloomington,

IN:Author House.

Messman-M., Terri L. and Coates, A.A., (2007) 'The Impact of Psychological Abuse on

Adult Interpersonal Conflict', Journal of Emotional Abuse, 7: 2, 75 — 92.

Muetzelfeld, H., & Mcwhirter, P. (2015). ‘Surviving to Thriving: Positive Psychology

Perspectives on Trauma, Violence and Abuse’.

 O’Hagen, K. (2006). ‘Identifying Emotional and Psychological Abuse: A Guide For

Childcare Professionals’. Philadelphia, PA: McGraw-Hill.

Stark, Sharon. (2015). ‘Emotional Abuse’.

Testa, A. (2007). ‘The Bully In Your Relationship: Stop Emotional Abuse and Get The

Love You Deserve’. Philadelphia, PA: McGraw-Hill.

Tracy, N. (2012, July 24). ‘Emotional-Psychological Abuse Articles’, HealthyPlace.

Retrieved on 2022, May 7 from [Link]

psychological-abuse/emotional-psychological-abuse-articles