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Surrendering to God's Will in Recovery

This document discusses the third step of Alcoholics Anonymous which involves surrendering one's will to God. It provides guidance on writing a third step prayer and understanding what surrender means. It includes exercises to help the reader reflect on how they see themselves 'playing God' and whether they are ready to turn their will and life over to a higher power.

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Robert Owen
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0% found this document useful (0 votes)
25 views9 pages

Surrendering to God's Will in Recovery

This document discusses the third step of Alcoholics Anonymous which involves surrendering one's will to God. It provides guidance on writing a third step prayer and understanding what surrender means. It includes exercises to help the reader reflect on how they see themselves 'playing God' and whether they are ready to turn their will and life over to a higher power.

Uploaded by

Robert Owen
Copyright
© All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd

Step Three

Exercise 1: Surrender

Alcoholics Anonymous, page 63, suggests one possible Third-Step


Prayer:
Many of us said to our Maker, as we understood Him: "God, I offer
myself to Thee to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self. that I mav better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness
to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!"

1. Write your own Third-Step Prayer.

Just how important is Step Three? With 15 years of personal


recovery and the benefit of significant input from others about their
experiences with the Steps, Bill W. wrote:

In fact, the effectiveness of the whole A.A. program will rest upon
how well and earnestly we have tried to come to "a decision to turn
our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
" (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, 34-35)
Step Three

2. What does surrender mean to you?

Write your own letter of surrender. For example: "God, I surrender! I


am tired of getting beat down and hurting myself and those I love..”

Surrender is the simple but profound wisdom of yielding to rather


than opposing the flow of life. (Eckhart Tolle, Practicing the Power
of Now)
Step Three

3. Where are your actions or thoughts in opposition to the flow of


life?

"We thought well before taking this step making sure we were
ready...." (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 63). "We thought well" about
what? We thought about what it really means to make this decision
to surrender control.

Have you ever thought about what a recovery-centred life would feel
like versus a self-centred life?

We often hear the suggestion, "Let go and let God." Who


consciously decides to play God? Not me. Not you. But many of us
have a terrible time letting God as we understand God run the world
(having a new Employer, Director, etc.). No matter how much we
resolve not to, we try to control things we can't control. That's what
playing God is, and that's what a lot of us have practiced for a long,
long time. Playing God is not only hard work, it's also a good way to
ruin relationships!
Step Three

4. How do you see yourself playing God?

Exercise 2: We Thought Well Before Taking This Step

1. Do you have a sufficient belief in a Higher Power to trust that


Power with your life?

2. You are making a decision to turn from self-will toward Higher


Power's will. How has your self-will affected you?

3. What is God's will for you?


Step Three

4. What does your will look like?

5. What's the difference between your will and God's will?

6. How can you tell if you’re in God's will?

7. How can you tell if you’re in self-will?


Step Three

8. To what other things have you turned over your will and your
life?

9. What is your current concept of a Higher Power, and is it


working for you?

10. What does the word care mean to you?

11. Are you truly surrendered, or just compliant?


Step Three

12. Are you just going through the motions?

13. Are you fighting anything right now?

14. Are you convinced that a life run on self will not work?

15. What do you chase that takes you away from your Higher
Power?
Step Three

16. How do you feel when you chase things that don't matter?

17. Do you think God has ever punished you?

18. Do you want to run the show? Have you ever run the show
well?

19. Finish this sentence: "Self-will makes me_________________”

Exercise 3: Defining Responsibility


Step Three

Write two lists. On one, write what you are responsible for and on
the other, what is God's responsibility. With these two completed
lists, we can see what is our part and what is not.

What are you responsible for?

What is your Higher Power responsible for?

Common questions

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Self-will is characterized by attempts to control circumstances and dictate outcomes based on personal desires, often leading to tension and conflict. In contrast, God's will involves accepting the guidance of a Higher Power and allowing life to unfold naturally. Indicators of self-will include stress, frustration, and strained relationships due to attempts to manage every detail of life. Conversely, when operating under God's will, individuals often experience peace, acceptance, and improved interpersonal dynamics as they trust in a path that aligns with a higher purpose .

Surrender in the Alcoholics Anonymous program is a critical component as it involves yielding control and accepting the flow of life rather than resisting it. This is closely related to the concept of 'letting go and letting God,' which emphasizes the importance of relinquishing personal control and trusting in a Higher Power to guide one's life. This act of surrender is fundamental to the effective implementation of the AA program, as it is only through acknowledging one's limitations and seeking strength from an external source that a person can truly work towards recovery. The realization of not having to control everything allows individuals to stop 'playing God,' thereby improving relationships and reducing personal struggles .

Belief in a Higher Power is fundamental in Step Three of the Alcoholics Anonymous program, where individuals decide to turn their will and lives over to the care of this power. This belief provides a foundation of trust, allowing individuals to relinquish control and accept guidance beyond their understanding. Without a genuine belief, the individual may lack the conviction needed to sincerely surrender, potentially undermining the effectiveness of their recovery journey as personal resistance and fear could persist. Thus, belief acts as the catalyst that enables the transformative process of Step Three .

Defining individual responsibilities versus those of a Higher Power aids in the recovery process by providing clarity and balance in one's life. By discerning what one can directly control and what should be entrusted to a Higher Power, individuals reduce unnecessary stress and focus efforts on actionable goals. This distinction empowers them to accept their limitations and cultivate a sense of peace, knowing that not every burden must be borne alone. It enables a cooperative dynamic where individuals can seek guidance and find reassurance in their Higher Power, further reinforcing their trust and promoting sustainable recovery .

An over-reliance on self-will often leads individuals in recovery to face challenges such as intense stress, persistent feelings of inadequacy, and damaged relationships. This self-reliance involves trying to dictate outcomes without recognizing one's limitations, setting unrealistic expectations, and resisting necessary change. Such an approach can exacerbate feelings of failure and self-doubt when inevitable setbacks occur, impeding progress in recovery by fostering frustration rather than acceptance and growth. Additionally, it can limit openness to guidance and support from others or a Higher Power, which are essential components of the recovery process .

'Playing God' in one's life, as discussed in the Alcoholics Anonymous context, can lead to strained relationships, heightened stress, and an overwhelming sense of responsibility. This approach often results in conflict with others, as individuals impose their desires and interpretations on situations rather than listening and adapting. It can also cause significant internal distress as one grapples with the unrealistic goal of controlling outcomes, potentially leading to feelings of failure and isolation. Moreover, this mindset hinders spiritual growth by preventing individuals from embracing the guidance of a Higher Power, thereby stifling progress in the recovery process .

Exploring and reconsidering one's current concept of a Higher Power is crucial in recovery as it ensures that the individual's spiritual foundation remains relevant and effective. As people progress through recovery, their experiences and understanding evolve, potentially necessitating adjustments in how they perceive and interact with their Higher Power. This reflection allows for the cultivation of a more personalized and meaningful spiritual connection, which is vital for maintaining motivation, spiritual growth, and openness to guidance. Without such exploration, individuals risk stagnation or disconnect from spiritual elements crucial for recovery success .

The Alcoholics Anonymous program emphasizes 'having a new Employer' or 'Director' as part of surrendering to a Higher Power to illustrate the need for a paradigm shift in which an individual relinquishes personal control. This metaphor suggests that, by entrusting their life to a higher authority, they are no longer burdened with the impossible task of managing every aspect of their existence. This change is crucial as it not only eases the individual’s psychological burden but also symbolizes a deeper commitment to trusting a greater force, thus facilitating recovery by promoting acceptance and spiritual growth .

Writing a Third-Step Prayer can significantly contribute to an individual's recovery journey in AA by fostering reflection and personalization of their relationship with a Higher Power. This exercise encourages individuals to articulate their desire for guidance and relief from self-bondage, reinforcing their commitment to letting go of self-will. By drafting a prayer in their own words, participants can deepen their spiritual connection, making the abstract concept of surrender more tangible and personal, thus enhancing their dedication to the recovery process and promoting greater self-awareness and spiritual growth .

Turning one's life over to a Higher Power can fundamentally change how individuals respond to trivial desires by shifting focus from self-centric pursuits to a more fulfilling, purpose-driven life. This practice encourages a reevaluation of priorities, helping individuals discern between what truly matters and what is superficial. As a result, it fosters a deeper sense of contentment and reduces the temptation to chase ephemeral pleasures that divert attention from recovery goals. By aligning actions with the values of a Higher Power, individuals achieve a more balanced and centered approach to their lives .

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