The Four Agreements

by Don Miguel Ruiz

Best gift for a debutante turning into an adult or earlier like an  The Dream of the Planet
adolescent who is in 3rd Year high school/14 years old? Or - the society’s dream
before stepping to Senior High School - collective dream of billions of smaller, personal
CHAPTERS dreams, which together create a dream of a
I. Domestication and the Dream of the Planet 1-4 family → community → city → country →
II. The First Agreement: WHOLE HUMANITY
Be Impeccable with Your Word 5-7 - include all of society’s rules, beliefs, laws,
III. The Second Agreement: religions, its different cultures and ways to be,
Don’t Take Anything Personally 7-9
IV. The Third Agreement:
its governments, schools, social events and
Don’t Make Assumptions 9-10 holidays
V. The Fourth Agreement:
Always Do Your Best 10-12
 We are born with a capacity to dream, and the
VI. The Toltec Path to Freedom: humans who live before us teach us how to
Breaking Old Agreements 12-16 dream the way the society dreams.
VII. The New Dream o outside dream
Heaven on Earth 16
- rules that when a new human is born, we
hook the child’s attention and introduce
Toltec these rules into his or her mind
- known in southern Mexico as “women and men of - uses Mom and Dad, the schools, and
knowledge” religion to teach us how to dream
- scientists and artists who formed a society to
explore and conserve the spiritual knowledge and  Attention
practices of the ancient ones - ability to discriminate and to focus only on that
- came together as masters (naguals) and students which we want to perceive
at Teotihuacan, the ancient city of pyramids  The adults around us hooked our attention and
outside Mexico City known as the place where put information into our minds through
“Man Becomes God” repetition.
- its knowledge arises from the same essential unity o Through attention, we learn a new reality;
of truth as all the sacred esoteric traditions found
we learn to behave in society.
around the world
- NOT a religion, but honors all the spiritual  Language
masters who have taught on the earth - code for understanding and communication
- embraces spirit - is an agreement
- way of life, distinguished by the ready
 As children, we didn’t have the opportunity to
accessibility of happiness and love
choose our beliefs, but we agreed with the
Don Miguel Ruiz information that was passed to us from the
- nagual from the Eagle Knight lineage dream of the planet via other humans.
 The only way to store information is by
CHAPTER 1: AGREEMENT.
Domestication and The Dream of the Planet o The outside dream may hook our attention,
 Everything you see and hear is a dream. but if we don’t agree, we don’t store that
information.
 Dreaming – main function of the mind o As soon as we agree, we believe it, and this
 The mind dreams, whether your brain is asleep or is called Faith.
awake.
 Domestication of Humans
o When the brain is awake, there is a material
- process wherein as a child, we believe in
frame that makes us perceive in a linear everything adults say, agree with them and our
way. faith is so strong that it controls our whole
o When we go to sleep, we do not have the dream of life; we do not choose them; we may
frame and the dream has the tendency to rebelled against them but not strong to win the
change constantly.

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 rebellion, thus resulting to surrender to the what you believe is going to make you feel
beliefs with our agreement unsafe.
- information from the outside dream is o Even if the Book of Law is wrong, it makes
conveyed to the inside dream, creating OUR you feel safe.
WHOLE BELIEF SYSTEM
 All our normal tendencies are lost in the process
of domestication.
o We only learn to say no when we are old  THAT IS WHY we need a great deal of courage to
enough for our mind to understand. challenge our own beliefs.
o Because even if we know we didn’t choose
 We become auto-domesticated animals when
all these beliefs, it is also true that we
we reach a point that our domestication is so
agreed to all of them.
strong, we no longer need anyone to
o The agreement is so strong that even if we
domesticate us.
o We can domesticate ourselves according to understand the concept of it not being true,
we feel the blame, the guilt, and the shame
the same belief system we were given and
that occur if we go against these rules.
using the same system of punishment and
reward.  Just as the government has a book of laws that
rule the society’s dream, our belief system is the
 Belief System
Book of Laws that rule our personal dream.
- like the Book of Law that rules our mind
o All these laws exist in our mind, we believe
- our TRUTH, without question
- where we base all of our judgements, even if them, and the Judge inside us bases
they go against our inner nature everything on these rules.
- these agreements rule our dream o The Judge decrees and the Victim suffers
the guilt and punishment.
 In our minds, we have:
o the inner Judge  But who says there is justice in this dream?
- uses what is in our Book of Law to judge o True justice is paying only ONCE for each
everything we do and don’t do, mistake.
everything we think and don’t think, and o True injustice is paying MORE THAN
everything we feel and don’t feel ONCE for each mistake.
 Every time we do something against o How many times do we pay for one mistake?
the Book of Law, the Judge says we o The human is the only animal on earth that
are guilty, we need to be punished, we pays a thousand times for the same
should be ashamed. mistake.
o the Victim o Because of our powerful memory, after
- carries the blame, the guilt and the paying for the mistake, we can REMEMBER,
shame we judge ourselves again, we are guilty
- part of us that says, “Poor me, I’m not again, we punish ourselves again and again.
good enough, I’m not intelligent enough, I’m o How many times do we make our spouse, our
not intelligent enough, I’m not worthy of children or our parents pay for the same
love, poor me.” mistake?
 Then the big Judge agrees and says, o Every time we remember the mistake, we
“Yes, you are not good enough.” blame them again and send them all the
 Fear emotional poison we feel at the injustice,
- feeling whenever something goes against the and then we make them pay for the same
Book of Law mistake. Is that justice?

 Breaking the rules in the Book of Law opens your  The whole dream is based on false law.
emotional wounds, and your reaction is to create o Ninety-five percent of the beliefs we have
emotional poison. stored in our minds are nothing but lies, and
o Because everything that is in the Book of we suffer because we believe all these lies.
Law has to be true, anything challenges

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 In the dream of the planet, it is normal for humans o ALL WE SEE is the truth, but with the
to suffer, to live in fear, and to create emotional agreements and beliefs we have stored in
dramas. our mind, we have no eyes for this truth.
o The outside dream is not a pleasant dream; o We are blinded by those false beliefs in our
it is a dream of violence, fear, war and mind.
injustice. o We have the need to be right and to make
o The personal dream of humans will vary, others wrong. We trust what we believe, and
but globally it is mostly a nightmare. our beliefs set us up for suffering.
o We live in a fog that is not even real. The fog
 If we compare the dream of human society with is a dream, your personal dream of life – what
the description of hell that religions all around you believe, all the concepts you have about
the world have promulgated, we find they are what you are, all the agreements you have
exactly the same. made with others, with yourself, and even
o Religions say that hell is a place of with God.
punishment, fear, pain and suffering, a place  Mitote
where the fires burn you. Whenever we - fog
feel these negative emotions, we - condition where a thousand people talk at the
experience a fire burning within us. same time, and nobody understands each
o We are living in a dream of hell. other
o If you consider hell as a state of mind, then - condition wherein you cannot see what you
hell is all around us. really are
o mitote maya
 Every human has his or her own personal dream
- Indian word meaning illusion
and just like the society dream, it is often ruled
- personality's motion of “I am”
by fear.
- everything you believe about yourself and the
o We learn to dream hell in our own life, in
world, all the concepts and programming you
our personal dream. have in your mind
o The same fears manifest, in different ways
for each person, but we experience anger,  We cannot see that who we really are; we
jealousy, hate, envy, and other negative cannot see that we are not free.
emotions.  Death is not the biggest fear we have; our
o Our personal dream can also become an biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive—the risk
ongoing nightmare where we suffer and live to be alive and express what we really are.
in a state of fear. o Just being ourselves is the biggest fear of
o But we don’t need to dream a nightmare. It humans.
is possible to enjoy a pleasant dream. o We have learned to live by other people’s
 All of humanity is searching for truth, justice and points of view because of the fear of not
beauty. being accepted and not being good enough
o We are on the eternal search for the truth for someone else.
because we only believe in the lies we have  During the process of domestication, we form an
stored in our mind. image of what perfection is in order to try to be
o We are searching for justice because in the good enough.
belief system we have, there is no justice. o We create an image of how we should be in
o We search for truth because it doesn’t order to be accepted by everybody.
matter how beautiful a person is, we don’t o We create this image, but this is not real.
believe that person has beauty. o We are never going to be perfect from this
 We keep searching and searching, when point of view.
everything is already within us.  Not being perfect, we reject ourselves.
o There is no truth to find. o The level of self-rejection depends upon
how effective the adults were in breaking
our integrity.

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 o After domestication, it is no longer about  We have the need to be accepted and to be
being good enough for ourselves because loved by other, but we cannot accept and love
we don’t fit with our own image of ourselves.
perfection. o The more self-love we have, the less we
o We cannot forgive ourselves for not being will experience self-abuse.
perfect. And so, we feel false, frustrated and  Self-abuse comes from self-rejection, and
dishonest. self-rejection comes from having an image of
o We try to hide ourselves, and we pretend to what it means to be perfect and never measuring
be what we are not. And so, we feel up to that ideal.
unauthentic and wear social masks to keep o Our image of perfection is the reason we
others from noticing this. reject ourselves;
o We are so afraid that somebody else will o It is why we don’t have accept ourselves
notice that we are not what we pretend to be. the way we are, and why we don’t accept
o We judge others according to our image of others the way they are
perfection as well, and naturally they fall
short of our expectations.
o We dishonor ourselves just to please other
people.
 We sometimes even do harm to our Prelude to a New Dream
physical bodies just to be accepted.
 We are not aware that the problem is  There are thousands of agreements you have
that we don’t accept ourselves. made with yourself, with your dream of life, with
God, with society, with your parents, with your
 Humans punish themselves endlessly for not children. But the most important agreements are
being what they believe they should be. the ones you made with yourself.
o They become self-abusive, and they use o In these agreements, you tell yourself who
other people to abuse themselves as well. you are, what you feel, what you believe
 But nobody abuses us more than we abuse and how to behave. The result is what you
ourselves. call your PERSONALITY.
o It is the Judge, the Victim and the belief  We have many agreements that make us suffer,
system that makes us do this. that make us fail in life.
o If we make a mistake in front of people, we try
 To live a life of joy and fulfillment, you need to
to deny the mistake and cover it up.
find the courage to break those agreements that
o But as soon as we are alone, the Judge
are fear-based and claim your personal power.
becomes so strong, the guilt is so strong, and
o The agreements that come from fear
we feel so stupid, or so bad, or so unworthy.
require us to expend a lot of energy, but
 The limit of your self-abuse is exactly the limit the agreements that come from love help
you will tolerate from somebody else. us to conserve energy and even gain extra
o If someone abuses you a little MORE than you energy.
abuse yourself, you will probably walk away
 Each of us is born with a certain amount of
from that person.
personal power we rebuild every day after we
o But if someone abuses you a little LESS than
rest.
you abuse yourself, you will probably stay in o Unfortunately, we spend all our personal
the relationship and tolerate it endlessly.
power to create all these agreements and then
o If you abuse yourself very badly, you can even
to keep these agreements thus making us feel
tolerate someone who beats you up, powerless.
humiliates you, and treats you like dirt.
o Why? Because in your belief system, you say,  We just have enough power to survive each day,
“I deserve it. This person is doing me a favor because most of it is used to keep the
by being with me. I’m not worthy of love and agreements that trap us in the dream of the
respect. I’m not good enough.” planet. How can we change the entire dream of our

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 life when we have no power to change even the o The word is like a seed.
smallest agreement? o The only problem is that too often it is
 If we can see it is our agreements that rule our fertile for the seeds of fear.
own life, and we don’t like the dream of our life, we o Every human mind is fertile but only for
need to change the agreements. those kinds of seeds it is prepared for.
o What is important is to see which kind of
 Each time you break an agreement, all the power seeds our mind is fertile for.
you create it returns to you.
o If you adopt these four powerful agreements,  Example: Hitler sent out all those seeds of fear
they will create enough personal power for and they grew very strong and beautifully
you to change the entire system of your old achieved massive destruction.
agreements.  During our domestication, our parents and
 You need a VERY STRONG WILL in order to siblings gave their opinions about us without even
adopt The Four Agreements. thinking. We believe these opinions and we lived
o But if you begin to live your life with these in fear over these opinions.
agreements, the transformation in your life will o Someone gives an opinion and says, “Look,
be amazing. this girl is ugly!” The girl listens believes she
o Instead of living in a dream of hell, YOU will is ugly and grows up with the idea that she
be creating a new dream—your personal is ugly. It doesn’t matter how beautiful she
dream of heaven. is; as long as she has that agreement, she
CHAPTER 2: will believe she is ugly. That is the spell she
The First Agreement is under.
 By hooking our attention, the word can enter our
Be Impeccable with Your Word.
mind and change our whole belief for better or
 The first agreement is the MOST IMPORTANT for worse.
ONE and the most difficult one to honor. o You may believe you are stupid and may
 Your word have believed this for as long as you
- power you have to create remember.
 This agreement can be very tricky
 The word is not just a sound or a written symbol; causing you to do a lot of things just to
it is a force, the power you have to express and ensure that you are stupid.
communicate, to think and thereby to create the  You may do something and think to
events in your life. yourself, “I wish I were smart, but I must
 It is through your word, you manifest everything. be stupid, or I wouldn’t have done that.”
o Regardless of what language you speak,  The mind goes in hundreds of different
your intent manifests through the word. directions, and we could spend days
o What you dream, what you feel and what getting hooked by just that one belief
in our own stupidity.
you really are, will all be manifested through
o Then one day someone hooks your
the word.
attention and using the word, let’s you
 The word is the most powerful tool of humans. know you are not stupid.
o But like a sword with two edges, it can  You believe what the person says and
create a beautiful dream, or destroy make a new agreement. As a result, you
everything around you. no longer feel or act stupid.
o One edge is the misuse of the word, which  The whole spell is broken, just by the
creates a living hell. power of the word.
o The other edge is the impeccability of the o Conversely, if you believed you are stupid,
word, which only create beauty, love, and and someone hooks your attention and
heaven on earth. says, “Yes, you are really the most stupid
person I have ever met,” the agreement will
 The human mind is like a fertile ground where
be reinforced and become even stronger.
seeds are continually being planted.
o You plant a seed, a thought and it grows.  Impeccability
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 - means “without sin” o The daughter believed what her mother
 Sin said and made an agreement with herself.
- anything that you do which goes against From then on, she no longer sang, she
yourself became shy to sing and even speaking
- everything you feel or believe or say that goes became difficult for her.
against yourself o Everything changed in the little girl
because of this new agreement: She
 You go against yourself when you judge or blame believed she must repress her emotions in
yourself for anything. order to be accepted and loved.
 Being impeccable is not going against yourself.  Whenever we hear an opinion and believe it, we
o When you are impeccable, you take make an agreement, and it becomes part of our
responsibility for your actions, but you do belief system.
not judge or blame yourself.
 The only thing that can break a spell is to make a
 Sin begins with rejection of yourself. new agreement based on truth. The truth is
o Self-rejection is the biggest sin that you being impeccable with your word.
commit.
 Gossip
 Being impeccable with your word is not using the - black magic at its very worst because it is pure
word against yourself. poison
o If I love myself, I will express that love in my
 We learn to gossip by agreement.
interaction with you, and then I am being
o When we were children, we heard the
impeccable with the word, because that
adults around us gossiping all the time,
action will produce a like reaction.
openly giving their opinions about other
 Being impeccable with your word is the correct people.
use of energy.
 Gossiping has become the main form of
o It means to use your energy in the direction
communication in human society.
of truth and love for yourself.
o It has become the way we feel close to
 If you make an agreement with yourself to be each other, because it makes us feel better
impeccable with your word, just with that to see someone else feel as badly as we do.
intention, the truth will manifest through you
 Using an analogy of the human mind as a
and clean all the emotional poison that exists
computer, gossip can be compared to a
within you.
computer virus.
o This is difficult because we learned to LIE as
o Example: You are beginning a new class with
a habit of our communication with others
a new teacher and you have looked forward
and more importantly to ourselves.
to it for a long time. But a person have
 The power of the word is completely misused in shared a gossip that he is a jerk, pervert and
hell. didn’t know what he was talking about.
o Mostly, we use the word to curse, to blame, o You are immediately imprinted with the
to find guilt, to destroy. word.
o Misuse of the word is how we pull each o As the teacher speaks, you feel the poison
other down and keep each other in a state and you don’t realize you started to see the
of fear and doubt. teacher in the same way. Soon, you hated
 Example: There was a kind and intelligent woman the class and decide to drop out. You blame
the teacher, but it is the gossip to blame.
who had a daughter she loved very much. One
o All of this mess can be caused by one little
night she went from a bad day at work with a
terrible headache. She wanted peace and quiet computer virus. One little piece of
but her daughter was jumping happily and singing information that can break communication
so loud, that it made the woman lost her control between people, causing every person it
and said, “Shut up! You have an ugly voice. Can touches to become infected and contagious
you just shut up!” to others.

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 o Imagine that every single time others gossip to o You will only receive a negative idea if your
you, they insert a computer virus in your mind, mind is fertile ground for that idea.
causing you to think a little less clearly every o When you are impeccable with your word,
time. your mind is no longer a fertile ground for
o Then imagine that in an effort to clean up words that come from black magic, instead,
your own confusion and get some relief from it is fertile for words that come from love.
the poison, you gossip and spread these o You can measure the impeccability of your
viruses to someone else. word by your level of self-love.
o Now imagine this pattern going on in a never- o How much you love yourself and how you
ending chain between all the humans on feel about yourself are directly
earth. proportionate to the quality and integrity of
o This poisonous virus is what the Toltec called your word.
the mitote, the chaos of a thousand different o When you are impeccable with your word,
voices all trying to talk at once in the mind. you feel good; you feel happy and at peace.
 Even worse are the computer hackers who  Use the word in the correct way.
intentionally spread the virus. o Use the word to share your love.
o Think back at a time when you or someone o Use white magic beginning with yourself.
you know was angry with someone else and o Tell yourself how wonderful you are, how
desired revenge. great you are. Tell yourself how much you love
o In order to seek revenge, you said yourself.
something to or about the person with the
intention of spreading poison and making
that person feel bad about him– or herself.
o As children we do this thoughtlessly but as
we grow older, we become much more
calculated to bring other people down.
o Then we lie to ourselves and say that
person received a just punishment for their CHAPTER 3:
wrongdoing. The Second Agreement
o When we see the world through a
computer virus, it is easy to justify the Don’t take anything personally.
cruelest behavior. What we don’t see is that  The next 3 agreements are born from the first
misuse of our word id putting us deeper agreement.
into hell.
 When we take opinions of others personally, we
 For years, we have received gossips and spells agree with whatever was said.
from the words of others but also from the way o As soon as we agree, the poison goes
we use our words with ourselves. through you, and you are trapped in the
o We talk to ourselves constantly and most of dream of hell.
the time we say things like, “Oh, I look fat, I
look ugly. I’m stupid, I never understand  Personal Importance
anything. I will never be good enough, and - taking things personally
I’m never going to be perfect.” - maximum expression of selfishness because
o We often use word against ourselves. we make the assumption that everything is
about “me”
 If we adopt the first agreement, and become
impeccable with our word, any emotional poison  Nothing other people do is because of you.
will eventually be cleaned from our mind and o All people live in their own dream, in their
from our communication in our personal own mind.
relationships, including with our pet dog or cat. o When we take things personally, we make
the assumption that they know what is in
 Impeccable of the word will also give you our world, and we try to impose our world
immunity from anyone putting a negative spell on their world.
on you.
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 Even when a situation seems so personal, even if o The way you see that movie is according to
others insult you directly, it has nothing to do the agreements you have made with life.
with you. o It is no one’s truth but yours.
o What they say, what they do, and the
 There is no reason to get mad if you are not
opinions they give are according to the
dealing with fear.
agreements they have in their own minds.
o If you live without fear, if you love, there is
o If someone gives you an opinion and says,
no place for any of those emotions, it is
“Hey, you look so fat,” don’t take it
logical that you will feel good.
personally, because the truth is that this
person is dealing with his or her own  When you feel good, everything is great, and
feelings, beliefs and opinions. everything makes you happy.
o That person tried to send poison to you and o You are loving everything that is around
if you take it personally, then you take that you, because you are loving yourself,
poison and it becomes yours. because you like the way you are, you are
content with you.
 Taking things personally makes you an easy prey
o In that state of bliss, you are making love all
for these predators.
o You eat all their emotional garbage and now the time with everything that you perceive.
it becomes your garbage.  If they tell you how wonderful you are, they are
o If you do not take it personally, you are not saying that because of you.
immune in the middle of hell. o You know you are wonderful.
o It is not necessary to believe other people
 When you take things personally, then you feel
offended, and your reaction is to defend your who tell you that you are wonderful.
beliefs and create conflicts. o Even if someone got a gun and shot you in
o You make something big out of something the head, it was nothing personal. Even at
so little, because you need to be right and that extreme.
make everybody else wrong. You also try  Even the opinions you have about yourself are
hard to be right by giving them your own not necessarily true; therefore, you don’t need to
opinions. take whatever you hear in your own mind
 “What you say, what you do, and the opinions you personally.
have according to the agreements you have made— o The mind has the ability to talk and listen to
and these opinions have nothing to do with me.” itself.
o It is not important to me what you think about  The mind is a mitote, part of the mind is
me, and I don’t take what you think speaking, part of it is listening.
personally. o It is a big problem when a thousand parts of
o I don’t take it personally when people say, your mind are all speaking at the same time.
“Miguel, you’re the best,” and also when they
 The mitote can be compared to a huge
say, “Miguel, you are the worst.”
marketplace where thousands of people are
o I KNOW you are happy when you say,
talking and bartering at the same time.
“Miguel, you are such an angel!” But when you
o Each one has different thoughts and
are mad, “Miguel, you are such a devil!”
feelings; each one has a different point of
o Either way, it does not affect me because I
view.
know what I am. I don’t have to be accepted.
o The mitote is the reason human hardly
o Whatever you think, whatever you fell, I know
know what they want, how they want it or
is your problem and not my problem.
when they want it.
o It is the way you see the world.
o They don’t agree with themselves because
o It is nothing personal, because you are dealing
there are parts of the mind that want one
with yourself, not with me. thing, and other parts that want exactly the
 You create an entire picture or movie in your opposite.
mind, and in that picture, you are the director, o Only by making an inventory of our
producer, main actor. It is your movie. agreements will we uncover all of the

8
 conflicts in the mind and eventually make o When we make assumptions, we are asking
order out of the chaos of the mitote. for problems.
 Don’t take things personally because by taking o We make an assumption, we
things personally, you set yourself to suffer for misunderstand, we take it personally, and
nothing. we end up creating a whole big drama for
o Humans are addicted to suffering at nothing.
different levels and to different degrees,  The big mitote of the mind creates a lot of chaos
and we support each other in maintaining which causes us to misinterpret everything.
these addictions. o We only see what we want to see and hear
o If you have the need to be abused, you will what we want to hear.
find it easy to be abused by others. o We have the habit of dreaming with no
 You have to trust yourself and choose to believe basis of reality.
or not to believe when someone says to you. o Example: You see someone you like. That
o Wherever you go, you will find people lying person turns to you, smiles and walk away.
to you, and as your awareness grows, you You can make a lot of assumptions just
will notice that you also lie to yourself. because of this one experience. You create
o Do not expect people to tell you the truth a fantasy/ And you want to believe this
because they also lie to themselves. fantasy and make it real. But this fantasy is
in your mind, in your personal dream.
 When we really see other people as they are,
 Making assumptions in our relationships is really
without taking it personally, we can never be
hurt by what they say or do. asking for problems.
o Even if others lie to you, it’s okay. o We often make assumption that our
o They are lying to you because they are partners know what we think and that we
don’t have to say what we want.
afraid, afraid you will discover that they are
o If they don’t do what we assume they
not perfect.
o You will be lying to yourself if you don’t should do, we feel so hurt and say, “You
should have known.”
listen to their actions.
o In any kind of relationship, we can make an
o Telling yourself the truth about it may hurt,
assumption that they know what we think,
but you don’t need to be attached to the
and we don’t have to say what we want.
pain.
o A whole drama is created because we make
o Healing is on the way, and it’s just a matter
this assumption and then put more
of time before things will be better for you.
assumptions on top of it.
 If someone is not treating you with love and
respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you.
 We have the need to justify everything, to
o If that person doesn’t walk away, you will
explain and understand everything to feel safe.
surely endure many years of suffering with
o It is not important of the answer is correct;
him or her.
just the answer itself makes us feel safe.
o Walking away may hurt for a while, but
o This is why we make assumptions.
your heart will eventually heal.
o If others tell us something, we make
o Then you can choose what you really want.
assumptions, and if they don’t tell us
 You are never responsible for the actions of something, we make assumptions to fulfill
others; you are responsible for you. our need to know and to replace the need
to communicate.
CHAPTER 4:
 These assumptions are made so fast and
The Third Agreement
unconsciously most of the time because we have
Don’t make assumptions. agreements to communicate this way.
o We have agreed that it is not safe to ask
 The problem with making assumption is that we
questions; we have agreed that if people
believe that they are the truth.

9
 love us, they should know what we want or o When you see what you didn’t want to see
how we feel. before, it becomes amplified by your
o When we believe something, we assume emotional poison. Now you just have to
we are right about it, to the point that we justify your emotional pain and blame them
will destroy relationships in order to defend for your choices.
our position.
 We don’t need to justify love; it is there or not
 We make assumptions that everyone sees life there.
the way we do. o Real love is accepting other people the way
o We assume that other think the way we they are without trying to change them.
think, feel the way we feel, judge the way o If we try to change them, this means we
we judge, and abuse the way we abuse. don’t really like them.
o This is the biggest assumption that humans o If others feel that they have to change you,
make. that means they really don’t love you just
o And this is why we have a fear of being the way you are.
ourselves around others. o If you decide to live with someone, if you
o Because we think everyone else will judge make that agreement, it is always better to
us, victimize us, abuse us, and blame us s make that agreement with someone who is
we do ourselves. exactly the way you want him or her to be,
o So even before others have a chance to someone whom you don’t have to change at
reject us, we have already rejected all. Also, that person must love you just the
ourselves. way you are, so he or she doesn’t have to
change you at all.
 We also make assumptions about ourselves, and
this creates a lot of inner conflict.  We have to be what we are, so we don’ have to
o When we make an assumption, “I think I am present a false image.
able to do this,” then you discover you  The way to keep from making assumptions is to
aren’t able to do it, you overestimate or ask questions.
underestimate yourself because you haven’t o Make sure communication is clear.
taken the time to ask yourself questions o Have the courage to ask questions until you
and to answer them.
are clear as you can be, and even then, do
o Perhaps you need to gather more facts
not assume you know all there is to know
about a particular situation. Or maybe you about a given situation.
need to stop lying to yourself about what o Once you hear the answer, you will not
you truly want.
have to make assumptions because you will
know the truth.
 Also, find your voice to ask what you really want.
 Often, when you go into a relationship with o Everybody has the right to tell you no or
someone you like, you have to justify why you yes, but you always have the right to ask.
like that person.  When you stop making assumptions, you will be
o You only see what you want to see and you able to communicate cleanly and clearly, free of
deny there are things you don’t like about emotional poison.
that person. o Without making assumptions, your word
o You lie to yourself just to make yourself becomes impeccable.
right. YOU MAKE ASSUMPTIONS. o With clear communication, all of your
o One of these assumptions is “My love will relationships will change.
change this person.” o This is what I want; this is what you want.
o But it is not true. Your love won’t change
 We have all these habits and routines we are not
anybody. If they change, it is because they
even aware of.
want to change, not because you change
o Becoming aware is the first step.
them.

10
 o But understanding is not enough. hours a day, how many will it take me to
Information or an idea is merely the seed in transcend?”
your mind. o The Master looked at him and said, “if you
o What will really make the difference is meditate 4 hours a day, perhaps you will
action. transcend in 10 years.”
o Taking the action over and over again o Thinking he could do better, the man then
strengthens your will, nurtures the seed and said, “Oh, Master, what if I meditated eight
establishes a solid foundation for the new hours a day, how long will it take me longer
habit to grow. if I meditate more?”, the man asked.
o The Master replied, “if you meditate 8 hours
CHAPTER 5: a day, perhaps you will transcend in 20
The Fourth Agreement years.”
o “But why will it take me longer if I meditate
Always do your best. more?”, the man asked.
 This fourth agreement allows the other tree to o The Master replied, “You are not here to
become deeply ingrained habits. sacrifice your joy or your life. You are here
o It is about the action of the first three. to live, to be happy, and to love. If you can
do your best in 2 hours of meditation, but
 Keep in mind that tour best is never going to be
you spend 8 hours instead, you will only
the same from one moment to the next.
grow tired, miss the point, and you won’t
o Everything is alive and changing all the time,
enjoy your life. Do your best, and perhaps
so your best will sometimes be high quality, you will learn that no matter how long you
and other times, it will not be as good. meditate, you can live, love, and be happy.”
o In your everyday mood or condition, your
best can change from one moment to  Doing your best, you are going to live your life
another. intensely.
o Your best will also change over time. o You are going to be productive, you are
o As you build the habit of the four new going to be good to yourself, because you
agreements, your best will become better will be giving yourself to your family, to
than it used to be. your community, to everything.

 Regardless of the quality, keep doing your best,  But it is the action that is going to make you feel
no more, no less than your best. intensely happy.
o If you try too hard to do MORE than your o When you do your best, you take action.
best, you will spend more energy than is o Doing your best is taking action because
needed and, in the end, your best will not you love it, not because you’re expecting a
be enough. reward.
o When you overdo, you deplete your body o Most people do exactly the opposite: They
and go against yourself, and it will take you only take action when they expect a
longer to accomplish your goal. reward, and they don’t enjoy the action.
o But if you do LESS than your best, you o Rewards will come, but you are not
subject yourself to frustrations, self- attached to the reward. They won’t matter
judgement, guilt and regrets. much because the process itself makes you
happy.
 If you do your best, no way you can judge
yourself.  When you do your best, you learn to accept
o And if you don’t judge yourself there is no yourself. But you need to be aware and learn
way you are going to suffer from guilt, from your mistakes.
blame and self-punishment. o Learning from your mistake means you
practice, look honestly at the results, and
 Anecdote: There was a man who wanted to keep practicing.
transcend his suffering, so he went to a Buddhist o This increases your awareness.
temple to find a Master to help him. He went to
the Master and asked, “Master, if I meditate four  Doing your best doesn’t feel like work because
you enjoy what you are doing.
11
 o You do your best because YOU WANT TO
DO IT, not because you want to do it, not
because you have to do it, not because you
are trying to please the Judge, and not
because you are trying to please other
people.
o If you take action because you have to,
then there is no way you are going to do
your best. Then it is better not to do it.
 Action is about living fully.
o Expressing what you are is taking action.
o It’s taking risk to go out and express your
dream.
o This is different than imposing your dream
on someone else, because everyone has the
right to express his or her own dream.
 Inaction is the way we deny life.
o Inaction is sitting in front of the television
every day for years because you are afraid
to be alive and to take risk of expressing
what you are.
o You can have many great ideas in your
head, but what makes difference is the
action.
 Taking a shower is a ritual for me, and with that
action, I tell my body how much I love it.
o I feel and enjoy the water on my body.
o I do my best to fulfill the needs of my body.
o I do my best to give to my body and to receive
what my body gives tom me.
 Let go of your past and live in the present, right
here and now.
o If you live in a past dream, you don’t enjoy
what is happening right now because you
will always wish it to be different than it is.
o There is no time to miss anyone or anything
because you are alive.
o Not enjoying what is happening right now is
living in the past and being only half-alive.
o This leads to self-pity, suffering and tears.

12
 You were born with the right to be happy.
o You are alive, so enjoy it.
o Don’t resist life passing through you,  It is important to have a very strong will to keep
because that is God passing through you. these agreements.
 We don’t need to know or prove anything. o Why? Because wherever we go, we find
o Just be. that our path is full of obstacles.
o Say no, when you want to say no, and yes o Everything around us is a setup for us to
when you want to say yes. break them. All the other agreements are a
part of the dream of the planet.
 When you don’t do yourself, you are denying
yourself the right to be you.  Be a great warrior who can defend these Four
o You express your own divinity by being Agreements in your life.
alive and by loving yourself and others. o If you fall, do not judge. Do not give the
Judge the satisfaction of turning you into a
 The first three agreements will only work if you victim. Be tough with yourself.
do your best. o Stand up and make the agreement again.
o Don’t expect that you will always to be
impeccable with your word, not to take  If you break an agreement, begin again and again.
things personally or not to make o It will be difficult at first, but each day will
assumptions, but you can certainly do your become easier and easier until someday you
best. will discover that you are ruling your life
o By doing your best, you’ll improve yourself. with these Four Agreements.
o You don’t need to judge yourself, keep o Your love and self-respect will grow.
guilty, or punish yourself if you cannot keep o Do not be concerned about today. Just live
these agreements. one day at a time.
o It is important to acknowledge these, then
keep doing your best. CHAPTER 6:
The Toltec Path to Freedom
 Doing your best, over and over again, you will
become a master of transformation. Breaking Old Agreements
o Practice make the master.
o Everything you have learned, you learned  True Freedom is the freedom to be who we really
are.
through repetition.
o Action is what makes the difference.  If we see a child who is two or three, we find a
free human.
 If you do your best in the search for personal
o Just like a flower, a tree or animal that has
freedom, in the search for self-love, you will
not been domesticated— wild!
discover that it’s just a matter of time before you
o Children, most of the time, have a big smile
find what you are looking for.
o It is not about daydreaming or sitting for on their face and they’re having fun.
o They are exploring the world. They are not
hours dreaming in meditation.
afraid to play.
 Your own body is the manifestation of God, and o They are afraid when they are hungry,
if you honor your body, everything will change when some of their needs are not met, but
for you. they don’t worry about the past, don’t care
o Stand up and be human. about the future, and only live in the
o Honor the man that you are. present moment.
o Respect your body, enjoy your body, love o They are not afraid to express what they
your body, feed, clean and heal your body. feel.
o When you practice giving love to every part o Our normal human tendency is to enjoy life,
of your body, you plant seeds of love in to play, to explore, to be happy and to love.
your mind, and when they grow, you will
 What has happened with the adult human?
love, honor and respect your body
immensely.
13
 o What happened is that we have the Book - to be aware of who we are, with all the
of Law, the big Judge, the Victim and the possibilities
belief system don’t allow us to be who we 2. Mastery of Transformation
really are. Once our minds have been - how to change, how to free of
programmed with all that garbage, we are domestication
no longer happy.
3. Mastery of Intent
 This chain of training from human to human, - Mastery of Love
from generation to generation, is perfectly
normal in human society.
o You don’t need to blame your parents for  Intent is part of the life that makes
teaching you the programming they transformation of energy possible.
received, so they couldn’t have behaved o It is the one living being that seamlessly
any differently. encompasses all energy.
o There is no time to blame anyone who o It is life itself.
abused you in your life, including yourself.  From the Toltec Point of View, all humans who
o But it is time to stop the abuse. are domesticated are sick.
o It is time to free yourself of the tyrant of o They are sick because there is a parasite
the Judge by changing the foundation of that controls the mind and controls the
your own agreements. brain.
o It is time to be free from the role of the o The food for the parasite is the negative
Victim. emotions that come from fear.
 The real you is still a little child who never grew o If we look at the description of a parasite,
up. we find that it is a living being who lives off
o In the happiest moments of your life, the of other living beings, sucking their energy
real you come out, when you don’t care without any useful contribution in return,
about the past and you don’t worry the and hurting their host, little by little.
future. You are childlike. o The Judge, the Victim and the belief system
fit this description very well.
 But there is something that changes all that: We
call them responsibilities.  The freedom we seek is to use our own mind and
o The Judge says, “Wait a second, you are body, to live our own life, instead of the life of
responsible, you have things to do, you the belief system.
have to work, you have to go to school, you  When we discover that the mind is controlled by
have to earn a living.” the Judge and the Victim and the real “us” is in
 Awareness is the first step towards personal the corner, we have just 2 choices:
freedom. o One choice is to keep living the way we are,
o With awareness, you can rebel and say, to surrender to the Judge and the Victim, to
“This is enough!” keep living the dream of the planet.
o You can look for a way to heal and o The second is to do what we do as children
transform your personal dream. when parents try to domesticate us. We
can rebel and say no.
 That is why it is important for you to master your
own dream; that is why the Toltecs became  The parasite can be compared to a monster with
dream masters. a thousand heads.
o One solution is to attack the parasite head
 To be a Toltec is a way of life. by head, which means we face our fears,
o It is a way of life where there are no leaders one by one. This is a slow process, but it
and no followers, where you have your works. Every time we face one of the fears,
truth and live your own truth. we are a little more free.
 There are 3 masteries that lead people to o A second approach is to stop feeding the
become Toltecs: parasite. To do this we have to gain control
of our emotions, we have to refrain from
1. Mastery of Awareness
14
 fueling the emotions that come from fear. o Start breaking agreements that are very
It is difficult to do because the Judge and small and require less power until you reach
the Victim exists and controls our mind. a point you can conquer bigger demons in
o A third solution is called the initiation of the your mind.
dead. This is a symbolic death which kills
 For every agreement you break that makes you
the parasite without harming our physical
suffer, you need to replace it with a new
body.
agreement that makes you happy.
o This will keep the old agreement form
coming back.
o There are many strong beliefs in the mid
that can make this process look hopeless.
The Art of Transformation:
The Dream of the Second Attention
o This is why you need to go step-by-step
and be patient with yourself because this is
 The process of domestication can be called the a slow process.
dream of the first attention because it was how o The way you are now is a result of years of
your attention was used the first dream of your domestication. You cannot expect to break
life. domestication in a day.
 One way to change your beliefs is to focus your o Breaking agreement is very difficult because
attention on all those agreements and beliefs and we put the power of the word (which is the
change the agreements with yourself. power of our will) into every agreement we
o In doing this, you are using your attention have made.
for the second time, thus creating the  We need the same amount of power to change
dream of second attention or the new an agreement.
dream. o Almost all our personal power is invested in
o The difference is that you are no longer keeping the agreements we have with
innocent. When you were a child, this was ourselves. They are like a strong addiction.
not true; you didn’t have a choice. Now you o We are addicted to beliefs that tell us, “I’m
have the choice of what to believe and not good enough, I’m not intelligent
what not to believe. You can choose to enough. Why even try? Other people will
believe in anything and that includes do it because they’re better than me.”
believing in yourself. o All of these old agreements which rule our
 The first step is to become aware of the fog that dream of life are the result of repeating
is in your mind. them over and over again.
o If you have the awareness that the whole o Therefore, to adopt the Four Agreements,
drama of your life is the result of what you you need to put repetition in action.
believe, and what you believe is not real,
then you can begin to change it. The Discipline of the Warrior:
o However, to really change your beliefs, you Controlling Your Own Behavior
need to focus your attention on what is it  Every day we awake with a certain amount of
that you want to change. mental, emotional and physical energy that we
 The next step is to develop awareness of all the spend throughout the day.
self-limiting, fear-based beliefs that make you o If we allow our emotions to deplete our
unhappy. energy, we have no energy to change our
o You take an inventory of all that you lives or to give to others.
believe, all your agreements, and through  The way you see the world will depend on your
this process, you begin the transformation. emotions are feeling.
 Practicing the four new agreements is a big act  Imagine the all humans have a skin disease. Nobody
of power. can touch each other. Everyone has wounds on their
o Every time you break an agreement based skin and the pain is considered normal; we believe
from fear, you gain extra power. we are supposed to be that way.

15
 o The human mind is exactly like this description o These lies are called the denial system.
of the skin infected with the disease. o The denial system allows us to cover the
o Every human has an emotional body wounds and still function.
covered with infected wounds. o But once we no longer have the wounds,
o Each wound is infected with emotional we don’t need to lie anymore.
poison—the poison of all the emotions that o We don’t need the denial system anymore
makes us suffer, such as hate, anger, envy because a healthy mind, like a healthy skin,
and sadness. can be touched without hurting.
o The mind is so wounded and full of poison
 The problem with most people is that they lose
by the process of domestication that
control of their emotions.
everyone describes as normal.
o It is the emotions that control the behavior
 We have a dysfunctional dream of the planet, of the human, not the human who controls
and humans are mentally sick with a disease the emotions.
called fear. o When we lose control, we say things we
o The symptoms of the disease are all the don’t want to say, and do things that we
emotions that make humans suffer: anger, don’t want to do.
hate, sadness, envy and betrayal. o That’s why it is so important to be
o When the fear is too great, the reasoning impeccable with our word and to become a
mind begins to fail, and we call this mental spiritual warrior.
illness. o We must learn to control our emotions so
 If we can see our state of mind as a disease, we that we have enough personal power to
find there is a cure. change our fear-based agreements, escape
o First, we need the truth to open the from hell and create our own personal
emotional wounds, take the poison out, and heaven.
heal the wounds completely.  How to be a warrior?
o How do we do this? o The warrior has awareness. We are aware
o We must forgive those we feel have that we are at war, and the war in our
wronged us, not because they deserve to minds require discipline. Not the discipline
be forgiven, but because we love ourselves from the outside to tell us what to do and
so much, we don’t want to keep paying for what not to do, but the discipline to be
the injustice. ourselves, no matter what.
o We can choose to forgive because we feel o The warrior has control. Not control over
compassion for ourselves. We can let go of another human, but control over one’s own
the resentment and declare, “That’s enough! emotions, control over one’s own self.
I will no longer be the big Judge that goes o It is when we lose control that we repress
against myself. I will no longer beat myself the emotions, not when we are in control.
up and abuse myself. I will no longer be the o The big difference between a warrior and a
Victim.” victim is that a victim represses, the warrior
o Once you forgive our parents, our brothers, refrains.
our sisters, our friends, and God. Once you o Victims repress because they are afraid to
forgive God, you can finally forgive yourself, show the emotions, afraid to say they want
the self-rejection in your mind is over. Self- to say.
acceptance begins, and the self-love will o To refrain is not the same thing as
grow so strong that you will finally accept repression.
yourself just the way you are. o To refrain is to hold the emotions and to
o You will know you have forgiven someone express them in the right moment, not
when you see them and you no longer have before, not later.
a negative emotional reaction.
 The truth is painful. Like a scalpel, it opens all the The Initiation of the Dead:
wounds which are covered by lies so that we can Embracing the Angel of Death
be healed.
16
 If we go to the hospital and the doctor tells us that o Imagine living your life without the fear of
we have one week to live, what are you going to do? being judged by others.
We have 2 choices: o Imagine your life without judging others.
o One is to suffer because we are going to o Imagine living without the fear of loving and
die, and to tell everyone, “Poor me, I am not being loved.
going to die,” and really create a huge o Imagine living your life without being afraid
drama. to take a risk and to explore life.
o The other choice is to use every moment to o Imagine that you love yourself just the way
be happy, to do what we really enjoy doing. you are.
If we have one week to live, let’s enjoy life.
Let’s be alive. We can say, “I’m going to be  They are entirely possible! But in order to
myself.” experience this dream, you must understand what
it is.
 Prepare for the initiation of death.
o Be completely open— to know there is
nothing to be afraid of.
o And of course, to treat people you love
 Only love has the ability to put you in that state
with love because this may be the last day
of bliss.
that to tell how much you love them.
o Life can be very easy when love is your way
o Do not deny your love. It is not important if
of life.
you love me back. I may die tomorrow, or you
o You can be loving all the time.
die tomorrow, what makes me happy now is
o This is your choice.
to let you know how much I love you.
o You may not have a reason to love, but you
 To surrender to the angel of death we will can love because to love makes you so
survive the most wonderful gift—the happy.
resurrection. o Love in action only produces happiness.
o To receive the resurrection is to arise from o Love will give you inner peace.
the dead, to be alive, to be ourselves again. o You can see everything with the eyes of
o The angel of death comes to us and says, love. When you live this way, there is no
“You see everything that exists here is mine; longer the mitote, the fog in your mind.
not yours. You house, your spouse, your
children, your car, your career, your money
— everything is mine and I can take it away
when I want to, but for now you can use it.”
o The angel of death teaches us to live in the
present.

CHAPTER 7:
The New Dream

Heaven on Earth
 The dream you are living is your creation.
o It is your perception of reality that you can
change at any time.
 Imagine seeing yourself living in a new life, a new
dream, a life where you don’t need to justify your
existence and you are free to be who you are:
o Imagine that you have permission to be
happy and to really enjoy your life.
o Imagine living your life without fear of
expressing your dreams.

17