VERBATIM

The counseling process takes place at a room in an old folks house. A young-rich man has
been asked to undergo a counseling session by the management of the old folks house
because he can’t accept his father in his life anymore.

First Stage – Attending

This is the first stage of counseling process where a counselor tries to attend his/her client
in order to make something clearer. The counselor will provide a comfortable
environment so that the process can be done smoothly.

Dialogue

A client knocks hardly at a door’s room.

Counselor : Come in. (a young and handsome man Non-verbally – open

enter the room). Assalamualaikum. (raise posture to show receptive
hand for handshake)

Client : Waalaikumussalam (shaking hands with

counselor arrogantly).

Counselor : Have a seat, [Link].

Client : Thank you.

Counselor : So, what should I call you?

Client : Just call me Jeff.

Counselor : OK Jeff, please make yourself at home. Eye contact and facial
(the counselor smiling to the client). expression

Client : Thank you (the client doesn’t reply the

smiling back).

Counselor : I’m Wan Najmu’deen Wan Omar, your Attract client’s attention
counselor for today. Wow, the condition
outside there is quit cool right? It seems
like the rain would fall anytime from now.

Client : Yes, I think so. (the client replied

hesitantly)

Counselor : Don’t you feel comfortable now, Jeff? Concerning of client’s

feeling
Client : I’m just fine.

Counselor : Are you sure Jeff?

Client : Yeah, I’m just fine.

Counselor : Ok Jeff, you don’t have to worry. You Answer the client’s
can put you trust on me. As far as you can anxiety and curiosity
see, there is no camera in this room. There
is also no recorder that can record our
meeting today. Everything that you tell me Staying confidential
will be our secret, just between us.

Client : Yeah (nodding, but unintentionally). But

I don’t think that I should be here. I’m not
a prisoner that should attend a counseling
session. I have my own career.

Counselor : No Jeff, you are not. Don’t think that you

Gain client’s trust
have attended a counseling session. I’m
here to help you as my friend that needs
my advice. You are like my friend, not my
client.

Client : Whatever (sighed).

Counselor : Well Jeff, I’m so bored last night. I went Attract client’s
to play paintball last night. Don’t you attention
think that game was great?

Client : You play paintball? That is my favourite

activity. (the client throw a smile to the
counselor). Where do you play that game?

Counselor : Sultan Salahuddin Club. I went there

with my friend. So, where do you usually Determine hidden
play that game? I’m sure that you have a feelings
lot of friends, right? Surely you feel enjoy
with them.

Client : Yes, since I don’t have any family

anymore, so my friends are everything.
They are my family for me. I’m all alone
without them.
Counselor : Yeah, I see your situation now. You are Show empathy
all alone, right? You don’t have family,
you just have your friends in your life. So, Paraphrasing
that’s why we call you to come here, to
give back what you should have. The one
that you should take care for him when he Promoting decision
is not able to take care for himself making
anymore.

Client : My father? No way. I prefer to be with

my friends rather than him. He had died
long time ago in my life. My family
suffered because of him.
Second Stage – Exploration

This is the second stage of counseling process where a counselor enabling clients to
examine themselves, their internal and external worlds. The counselor will encouraging
client to describe their problem and expectation, to examine their own behaviour, to
clarify and find meaning in their feelings and to consider how they might resolve their
concerns. This will help clients in the often painful process of sharing their shame,
humiliations, hopes and fantasies.

Dialogue

Counselor : Just calm down Jeff. I know your

situation now. That’s why I’m here to help Staying confidential
you. Just tell me everything that bothers
you now. It’s all just between us.

Client : I don’t know where I should start. I never

have a father’s love before. I’m feeling
like I was born to this world without a
father. And I really don’t have father
actually, I just have mother and sister. My
mother passed away 7 years ago, and I’m
the one who take care for my family after
that. Now, my sister also has her own
career. She can live on her own feet
because of me.

Counselor : You are a good son, Jeff. You are willing Respect and positive
to take care for your family alone. But that regard
doesn’t mean that you can deny that you
have a father in this world, isn’t it? Ask for clarification

Client : Oh man, you really don’t know what had

happened to my family. There were a lot
of miserable things happened because of
him.

Counselor : I see your situation Jeff. Just continue Verbal reinforcer

with everything that bothers you now.

Client : Okay, frankly said, he is really an

irresponsible father. He doesn’t have any
job, and always come home late at night.
He is a gambler that likes to drink a lot.
 Oh my god, I really hate him. I feel
ashamed of having a father like him.

Counselor : Okay Jeff, you said that you really hate Paraphrasing
him and ashamed of having a father like
him since he is a gambler that likes to
drink, right? What’s more that have been
Perception check
done by your father that make you can’t
accept him in you life anymore?

Client : Since I was child, I never saw my mother

be in happy situation. Most everyday she
will be hit because of irrelevant reason.
Can you imagine that? I still remember
that night, he mad at me because I stared
at him. Then he tried to hit me but my
mother protected me. Because of that, my
mother fell down and bleeding on her
head. He innocently left the house after
that, without knowing that how my mother
felt at that time.

Counselor : I don’t blame for your feedback towards

your father. It is natural to behave like that
Genuineness
as a reflection of what had happened. But I
know there is something behind what had
happened right.

Client : I don’t know what I want to say

anymore. What I know is I hate him damn
much. I can’t see his face anymore, or else
I feel like I want to kill him.

Counselor : Wow, your expression shows that you are

very angry with him. Its okay, I
understand. But what I want to say is the Summarising
feeling will not bring this problem
nowhere. As a son, you will know what
you have done one day.

Client : I knew it, but what can I do? I’m just an

ordinary people that have feelings, just
like you.

Counselor : Yeah, that’s true. Every normal people Reflection of feeling

have feelings. My advice is, it’s not the
 feelings that control ourselves, but we
have to know how to control the feelings.
Well, before we proceed, let me check out
what you have told me just now. You said
that you hate your father and you feel
Summarising
ashamed of having a father like him.
Because of that, you never feel happy with
your father since you was child. Then,
your family suffers because of him. Is it
right, Jeff?

Client : Yeah, right (the client stared to the floor).

Third Stage – Understanding

This is the third stage of counseling process where a counselor attempt to grasp as fully
as possible the messages that client are trying to convey by both their verbal and non-
verbal behaviour.

Dialogue

Counselor : Well Jeff, don’t you feel anything by Confrontation

neglecting your father just like that?

Client : Did you say neglecting? Ahh, come on.

He is the one who neglected us. So, he
should accept what he had done to us. He
deserves to be here.

Counselor : Yes, that’s right. But you have to know

that whatever happens, he is still your Immediacy
father, your biological father. He is the one
who brought you into this world.

Client : Yes, I knew it. But what can I do. As I

said just now, I’m an ordinary people, I
have my own feeling. I want him to realize
that what he had done is wrong.

Counselor : You want him to realize that what he had Paraphrasing and
done is wrong. It sounds like revenge, isn’t clarification
it?

Client : Revenge? I don’t know. Umm, maybe

yes. I want him to know who am I. I want
hi to know that I can survive without him.
I can achieve my ambition job as an
engineer. Moreover, I have a lot of money
now although I have to go through a dark
life with him.

Counselor : I impress with you because you succeed

in your life apart of being through a hard Respect and positive
moment. But Jeff, your father is still your regard
father. Try to learn to forgive him, and
build a new life with
 him. I’m sure that he has changed. He has
no one in this world except you.

Client : You can say that because you don’t feel

what I feel. I still can be considered as a
good son because I put him in this old-
folks house. Or else, I just throw him away
at any paveyard and let him live there
without any shelter and food.

Counselor : You said that you are a good son, but is

that the characteristic of a good son? You Confrontation
are wrong Jeff. You can’t be considered as
a good child if you willing to do that to
your own father.

Client : (sigh).

Counselor : Jeff, it’s all about your relationship with

your father. He has no one in this world
Immediacy
except you. What your father had done in
the past, let it be a bad memory for you.
Try to learn to forgive him.

Client : It’s very hard for me to think about this.

Counselor : Jeff, I know that you believe in God,

right? So, just think about what I am trying
to say. You have gone through a dark
experience in your life. So do with your Reflection of feeling
father, he had made a big mistake in his
life. Now, you are comfortable with your
life, you have a lot of money, you feel
happy, but try to think about your father.
He has to suffer for the rest of his life if
you don’t do the right thing starting from
now.

Client : (the client just quiet and look

downwards).

Counselor : So from now, you have to think about

this. Think about the God’s power. You Immediacy
said that you have a lot of money, you
 have a good job, but that entire can
disappear in a split of second if God want.
What you have done to your father can be Reflection of feeling
considered as disobey to your parents. You
have committed a big sin Jeff. I’m not
trying to warn you, but this is the reality of
life.

Client : (the client still quiet, just nod upward and

downward)
Concerning of client’s
Counselor : Are you all right Jeff? feeling
Client : Oh, sorry. Yes. I’m all right.
Fourth Stage – Action

This is the fourth stage of counseling process where both client and counselor move to
the process of solving problem.

Dialogue

Counselor : Jeff, there surely a way in every problem.

First of all, don’t think that you can’t Genuineness
handle this situation. Believe in yourself.

Client : Yes, I get what you are trying to say. I’m

trying to think about this. It’s very hard for
me to decide on this since it involves with
my past.

Counselor : I’m proud of you Jeff, you still can

consider with this situation. Not all people Respect and positive
are like you. I have handled a lot of such regard
cases, and it’s very hard to find a person
like you.

Client : Thanks. I don’t need such of that

compliment. You had made me feel guilty.

Counselor : It’s okay to feel guilty actually. Like I Reflection of feeling

said, family is everything for us. Your
father is also a part of your family. So Jeff,
now you have two choices that you have
to think deeply, whether you want to Promoting decision
accept your father back in your life, or just making
let us to look after for him till the end of
his life.

Client : (the client stays quiet for a while). I don’t

know.

Counselor : Maybe you need time to think about this,

right? It’s okay. I’m not force you to
accept you father back. But I just perform Reflection of feeling
my responsibility to God as well as to you,
to inform you about the right and the
wrong thing. That’s all, Jeff.
Client : Yes, I just realize that. But everytime I
think about my father, I will remember
about what he had done to us. That’s
terrible for me.

Counselor : That’s a good sign actually, to show that

you are respond to the normal life. You Concreteness
can learn to adapt with that situation, Jeff.

Client : I have tried, but I failed.

Counselor : Take the fail as a catalizer for you. What

your father had done in the past, let it be a Reflection of feeling
relation between him and God. Only God
knows how to deal with your father. You
have to realize that you will marry and get
children one day. Can you imagine if the Open-ended question
same situation happens to you one day?

Client : I hope not. (the client show a sad

expression)

Counselor : So, like I said just now, only you can

make the decision. I don’t force you. If
Promoting decision
you willing to accept your father back,
making
that’s Alhamdulillah. But if not, it still
okay because God still wants us to
continue our responsibility to keep your
father.

Client : Well, I think I need time to think about

this. There are a lot of things that I have to
think about.

Counselor : It’s okay if you want that. I understand. Arranging follow up

Take your time to think about this. When session
do you think you can give the answer?

Client : Give me two weeks time. When I have

made the decision, I will let you know.

Counselor : My pleasure. I will wait. I know that you

will make the best decision.
Fifth Stage – Termination

This is the fifth stage of counseling process where a client has accomplished the goals
whether it set by the counselor or the client himself or herself during the evaluation. The
client is ready to end the counseling session.

Dialogue

Counselor : Okay Jeff, let us check what we have Summarizing as well as

discussed during this session. We have reviewing the whole
identified your problem regarding on your process
situation. Then we have set some goal for
you to achieve. Apart from that, there are
also some solutions for your case. So, how Perspective check
do you feel now?

Client : I feel much better. I never think about my

father before. I just think about what he
had done. Now, there are people who
concern about me.

Counselor : Okay, that’s good for you. That’s a

function for us as human being. Apart of Gives feedback and
care for ourselves, we also have to care for affirmation
others as long as it is not beyond the limit.

Client : Okay, I will bear in mind about that.

Thank you for understand me and for
everything. Hmm, I will tell my decision
in two weeks time from now.

Counselor : Welcome. That’s my responsibility. I will Unconditional positive

wait for your answer. It’s very nice to regard
know and deal with you.

Client : Okay, see you. Assalamualaikum.

Counselor : Waalaikumussalam.