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Gender Differences in Conversational Styles

The document discusses differences in conversational styles between men and women. It notes that women's styles tend to focus on establishing relationships through sharing, supporting others, and including them, while men's styles emphasize asserting knowledge and status. The document suggests these differing approaches can lead to miscommunication and that understanding each other's styles can help improve relationships.

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sehrish
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253 views20 pages

Gender Differences in Conversational Styles

The document discusses differences in conversational styles between men and women. It notes that women's styles tend to focus on establishing relationships through sharing, supporting others, and including them, while men's styles emphasize asserting knowledge and status. The document suggests these differing approaches can lead to miscommunication and that understanding each other's styles can help improve relationships.

Uploaded by

sehrish
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd

Communication between men and women

can be like cross cultural communication,


prey to a clash of conversational styles.

Deborah Tannen (1990)


 Women’s
conversational styles
 Men’s
conversational styles
 Conversational
styles in
relationships
 Establish and maintain
relationships
Conversation is an
essential part of a
relationship
 Share and learn about
others
 Show equality
 Show support
 Include others
 Tell about themselves
 Are tentative
 Show equality by
matching
experiences
“You’re not alone in
how you feel.”
“I’ve done the same
thing many times.”
 Women respond and build on each other’s
ideas
Rather than “you-tell-your-idea-then-I’ll-
tell-mine,” voices weave together to
create conversations.
 Make others feel valued
 Understand the other person’s feelings
“Tell me about what happened.”
“How did you feel when it occurred?”
“Do you think it was deliberate?”
 Express sympathy
“Oh, you must feel terrible.”
“I think you did the right thing.”
“I really hear what you are saying.”
 Make others feel valued and included
 Women often start topics for others
“How was your day”
“Tell me about your meeting”
“Did anything interesting happen on your
trip”
 Stories about
themselves
 Share experiences
about themselves
 Verbal Hedges
“I kind of feel you may be overreacting”
“I’m not the best judge of this, but...”
 Use tag questions that invite responses
“That was a pretty good movie, wasn’t it?”
“We should get out this weekend, don’t
you think?”
 Achieve goals
Solve a problem
Win an argument
Make someone
laugh
Get information
 Improve status.
 Show off
 Speak in general
terms
 Are less
responsive
 Talk assertively
 Dominate
conversations
 Knowledge
 Ability
 Skills
 Offer few concrete experiences and personal
feelings
 Talk less about themselves
 Talking about personal problems shows that
you are weak
 Use more “minimal
response cues”
Yeah, uh-uh, hmm,
etc.
 Show less
sympathy
 Sympathy is a way of
looking down on
someone
 Direct & forceful
 Advice is what you
should do
 Men use fewer
hedges
 Talk more than women
 Talk more frequently
 Talk longer
 Select the topic of
conversation
 Interrupt (stop other
people from talking)
more
WOMEN MEN
 A relationship is
 A relationship is
going fine if
going fine if
there is no need
there is talk
to talk
 Talk is a process
 Talk is to solve
to support a
relationship
relationship
problems
 Talk is a way to
 Talk indicates a
show closeness
problem
 “We need to talk,”
 “We need to talk”
shows that we
is a signal to run
care about each
away.
other

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