compass

DIRECTION FOR THE

DEMOCRATIC LEFT

Boris Johnson
a member of the hard Tory right
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contents

Boris Johnson – a member of the hard Tory right

Part 1. A brief analysis of Boris Johnson’s politics – a hard line right winger

Part 2. Boris Johnson’s political views in detail

“Boris Johnson is by far the

most right wing candidate
ever to be presented by a
major party for Mayor of
London. This reality gives a
tremendous opportunity to
expose the real politics of the
Tory Party not only in London,
in the elections for Mayor and
the London Assembly, but
also nationally in the run up
to the general election. “

Compass publications are intended to create real debate and discussion

around the key issues facing the democratic left - however the views
expressed in this publication are not a statement of Compass policy.
 compass

Boris Johnson women with a candidate who extols cars as ‘chick pulling’?
– a member of the hard Tory right How can the Tory Party attempt to present itself as being
concerned with the poor with a candidate who opposed the
Part 1. A brief analysis of Boris Johnson’s politics – national minimum wage and opposed full pension rights for
a hard line right winger part time workers? It will have a candidate who whole
heartedly supports grammar schools. How can you present the
Compass wants to help develop a Tory party as socially concerned when Boris Johnson was a
progressive consensus for political member of one of the most socially elitist and yob-dominated
advance across London that is drinking clubs at Oxford University – and when it will draw
based on greater equality, a attention to the fact that David Cameron was also a member?
deepening of democracy, improved How can you present the Conservative Party as interested in
quality of life and well-being for all morality in politics when its candidate for Mayor of London was
as well as environmental prepared to discuss with a fraudster and fellow Etonian, Darius
sustainability. We believe there is a Guppy, about supplying a private address so that a journalist
very large progressive consensus in could be beaten up?
the capital for these politics. Boris
Johnson would only be a real The dynamic is clear. One of the most important Tory Party
electoral threat if Londoners do not websites, Conservative Home, was already debating by mid-
know what his real views are - August the acceptability of calling black people ‘picaninnies’.
which is why his campaign will try The overwhelming response of Tories replying was that it was.
desperately to hide them. But he ([Link]
will endeavour to stir up a [Link]). Such discussion, defence of such
regressive consensus. The battle lines of future political wars positions and language, will destroy any image of the
between left and right are going to be fought in London over Conservative Party as even faintly progressive – and destroy the
the next ten months. It is essential that people know the truth false image Cameron has spent the last eighteen months trying
about Boris Johnson and the politics he represents through his to create.
own words.
Such hard line right wing views are not surprising given that
Boris Johnson is by far the most right wing candidate ever to Boris Johnson is the former editor of The Spectator and chief
be presented by a major party for Mayor of London. This reality columnist for the Daily Telegraph – both publications of the Tory
gives a tremendous opportunity to expose the real politics of right. Some of his remarks are now rightly getting the attention
the Tory Party not only in London, in the elections for Mayor that they did not receive when he was running for nothing
and the London Assembly, but also nationally in the run up to more serious than chairing Have I Got News for You and
the general election. therefore could be treated as an irrelevant joke. But it is very
important to realise that these types of statements, such as
By running such a hard-line right wing candidate for a powerful those on ‘picaninnies’ and ‘water melon smiles’, are not just a
and high profile position, as well as one who has no record of few isolated comments taken out of context or misrepresented.
any serious managerial competence, the Tory Party will be It is to avoid any such impression that Boris Johnson’s views
directly associating itself with Johnson’s views. Johnson’s are outlined comprehensively and at length here.
extremely right wing positions will not only seriously damage
the attempt of the Tory party to present any type of Boris Johnson is frequently presented in the press merely as a
progressive image, but will particularly damage their relations buffoon. It is certainly true he has never shown any serious
with all the groups they have been trying to woo by managerial experience or competence, that he regularly makes
camouflaging the character of the party. huge mistakes and reverses positions, and this is an extremely
serious impediment to running a huge city such as London. But
How can the Conservative Party seek to gain credibility among as is shown here his buffoonery conceals a hard line right wing
black people while referring to them, as Boris Johnson has set of views – a type of Norman Tebbit in clown’s uniform.
done, as ‘picaninnies’ - and Africans as having ‘water melon
smiles’? How can the Tory Party pretend to be environmentally This point is important to make because Boris Johnson himself,
concerned while having a candidate for Mayor of London who from his earliest career, has always attempted to conceal his
opposed, as Boris Johnson did, the Kyoto Treaty on climate positions when he found it advantageous to do so – one of the
change? How can you attempt to get rid of a sexist approach to features even his fellow right wingers found undesirable.
Andrew Gimson, in his mainly supportive and airbrushed

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biography Boris, notes the following of Boris

Johnson’s earliest electoral campaign – when he
was a Tory but running for the President of the
Oxford Union:

‘Boris... practiced a series of bold deceptions about

his own political opinions... This behaviour was
witnessed by Frank Luntz, an American at Oxford,
[now a Republican Party pollster] whose outrage at Boris’s
conduct can be heard even down a transatlantic telephone line
twenty years later. Luntz says: “He renounced his
Conservative affiliation and fully embraced the SDP
and the principles and people who supported the SDP
to help him get elected. At that time being a member
of the Social Democrats was the best thing to be at
Oxford. I said to him ‘You don’t do this, this is a very
small country and it’s not right and it will come back
to haunt you.’ He abandoned them to get elected and
after he was elected he said he was a Tory again.”

Radek Sikorski confirmed this: “Boris made these SDP

speeches at the Union which was how he got elected”...
‘To pass himself off as a Social Democrat was not Boris’s only
deception. At Balliol, according to Lloyd Evans: “He never stood
in the Conservative interest. When he stood for the Union he make sure that everyone knows these views and that what is
told us he was an environmentalist.” (Andrew Gimson, Boris: being dealt with are not a few odd offensive remarks. It is an
the Rise of Boris Johnson p71) important opening to debunk any newly more progressive
image that the Tory Party has tried to create for itself in London
Boris Johnson is also not above straightforward invention – The and throughout the country.
Times sacked him as a journalist for inventing a quotation. The
Guppy affair also shows his very ‘singular’ sense of political Part 2. Boris Johnson’s political views in detail
morality. Standing for Mayor of London is certainly not the type
of amateurish politics of the Oxford Union. Boris Johnson will be International and overall politics
forced to stand nine months of full scale examination of his * Fanatical support for the Iraq war
politics and views. But it shows the type of activity he, and * Supporting both the election of George W Bush in 2000 and
those in the media who support him, will get up to. his re-election in 2004
* Opposed the Kyoto treaty on climate change
Boris Johnson can be elected MP in a constituency such as * Is an evangelist for nuclear power – and opposes wind
Henley, one of safest Tory seats in the country, by honestly farms
presenting his views. But he cannot be elected presenting * Is a fanatical Thatcherite
these views in London. Therefore the aim of those supporting * Considers Liberal Democrats have ‘a characteristic human
him – including in the media - is to conceal his views by psychological deformity’
presenting the whole election as a ‘joke’.
Economic Policies
The aim of the material collected here is therefore simple. It is * Opposed the introduction of the national minimum wage
to state the reality of Boris Johnson’s hard line right wing * Opposition to full pension rights for part-time workers
political views. There is not the slightest need to rip isolated * Believes trouble comes from ‘too zealous’ attempts to tackle
phrases out of context or to misrepresent them. He has had inequality
twenty years to put them down so there is no shortage of * Calls for large scale sacking of public sector workers as good
expressions of his positions. ‘for themselves’
* Defends privatisation of the railways
The job of progressives both in London and nationally is to

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Social and Environmental Policies drop a bomb on any house in any third world capital, at a time
* Attacks the welfare state as ‘excessive disbursements that of her choosing. And she certainly did not have the licence to
warp honest people’ do so.
* Wants to introduce the private sector into the NHS and
believes patients should pay more ‘It was mesmerising, in April 2003, to stand in Baghdad and
* Is opposed to the Social Chapter of the EU and also against look at the contrast between the Americans and the people
its provision on paternity leave they had liberated. The Iraqis were skinny and dark, badly
* Supports grammar schools and public schools dressed and fed. The Americans rode in their Humvees (a
* Does not support affordable housing vehicle that is eloquently bigger than our Land Rover: more
* Opposition to the congestion charge slouching, bigger tyred, cooler). The marines had the shades
* Is in favour of not only fox but stag hunting with the slick little nick in the corner. They were taller and
* Opposes the ban on smoking in restaurants and public squarer than the indigenous people, with heavier chins and
places better dentition. They looked like a master race from outer
space, or something from the pages of Judge Dredd…
Attitude to black people, women, gay rights, the Chinese
and others ‘But as I looked at the American effort, at the vast caravanserai
* Refers to black people as ‘picaninnies’ and ‘with of victualling lorries, I felt a real sense of awe. Saddam may
watermelon smiles’ have turned out to be a papier mache dictator. But it was still
* Attitudes to the black community and calls the Stephen an astonishing military achievement to remove him with so
Lawrence Inquiry ‘Orwellian’ few casualties on either side; and the political achievement
* Believes in South Africa there is the ‘majority tyranny of was still greater.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p1)
black rule.’
* On Africans and ‘instant carbohydrate gratification’ 'America's performance in Iraq was formidable, and made
* Believes Chinese culture is merely imitative Europe look ridiculous.' (Lend Me Your Ears p26)
* Sexism
* Labour’s ‘appalling agenda’ of ‘the teaching of ‘If we know the Pentagon, there must be a very good chance
homosexuality in schools’ that this will be an outstandingly successful and stress-free war,
* Attitude to the Koran with computerised drones queuing up over Baghdad and Basra
to pulverise the relevant silos and barracks.’ (Lend Me Your Ears
Political morality p363) ‘There must also be a risk, however, that the war will
* Considers Edward Kennedy faced a dilemma on whether to not only involve the deaths of many innocents, but will also
‘come clean’ on Chappaquiddick cost the British taxpayer considerable sums. The latest figures
* Supports Silvio Berlusconi suggest our bill could be £5 billion, which is almost as much as
Labour blew on foot and mouth. That is why it is so important
Other positions to persuade the public to snap out of their current
* Opposes devolution for Scotland and Wales curmudgeonliness.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p363)
* Insults New Guniea
* Insults Liverpool ‘Since it is time to put the good news into our utilitarian scales,
* Insults Portsmouth here is a statistic that you should be aware of, all you Fisks and
* Insults the Dutch Pilgers and Robin Cooks, who prophesied thousands and
* Believes ‘former crypto communists’ run the BBC thousands of deaths. I went to see Qusay Ali Al-Mafraji, the
* Is prepared to discuss how seriously a journalist should be head of the International Red Crescent in Baghdad. Though
beaten up and whether to supply his address some nametags have been lost, and though some districts
have yet to deliver their final tally, guess how many confirmed
Iraqi dead he has listed, both military and civilian, for the
Fanatical support for the Iraq war Baghdad area? He told me it was 150, and he has no reason to
lie.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p375)
‘Crumbs, I thought, as I stood on the edge of the crater. Crumbs
was the word. Or perhaps that should be fragments, little fist- ‘That is the best case for Bush; that, among other things, he
sized fragments of house. Whatever explosive the US Air Force liberated Iraq. It is good enough for me.’ (Daily Telegraph 26
use in their bunkerbusters, it is powerful stuff… When I first February 2004)
became a journalist fifteen years ago, America had not yet
reached this pitch of technological virtuosity, of being able to ‘We taxi pass the other Strike Eagles [US F15] 92 of them

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arrayed on either side like a guard of honour on their high, it entirely from a Ladybird book. It was called “Atomic Power”,
spindly legs, £4 billion worth of testosterone wrapped in steel I produced it at the age of nine, and in a spirit of unabashed
and titanium.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p310) and exuberant technological optimism I hymned the wonderful
things that followed the fission of an atom of uranium-235…
Supporting both the election of George W Bush in 2000 This is the nation that split the atom and yet now, my friends,
and his re-election in 2004 how fallen, how changed we are from that position of global
eminence.
‘You know, whenever George Dubya Bush appears on
television, with his buzzard squint and his Ronald Reagan side- ‘There is now a growing agreement that for the first time in a
nod, I find a cheer rising irresistibly in my throat. Yo, Bush baby, quarter of a century we must build nuclear reactors; there can
I find myself saying, squashing my beer can like some crazed be argument about how many, but they must be a part of the
redneck; you tell ‘em boy. Just you tell all those pointy-headed solution to our increasing energy problems….
liberals where to get off.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p317) ‘Will Bush
win…? Does he deserve to win? It may seem unwise to ‘As I said on this page recently, I am far too terrified to dissent
forecast the outcome of an election where there are 60 days to from the growing world creed of global warming.
go and even pollsters, such as my old friend Frank I. Luntz, say
that the result will be a matter of 1 per cent either way; and it ‘But even if it turns out that the worry has been overdone (by
may seem especially perverse for me both to think that he will the way, jolly nippy today, eh?), then there still seem to be
win, and – on the whole – to want him to win.’ (Have I Got overwhelming arguments for going nuclear. Look at the size of
Views for You p260) your gas bill…

‘Not only did I want Bush to win, but we threw the entire ‘We need an alternative, and one that doesn’t just involve
weight of The Spectator behind him.’ (Have I Got Views for You crucifying our landscape with wind farms which, even when
p272) they are in motion, would barely pull the skin off a rice
pudding.‘That is why I am reverting to my nine-year-old self’s
Opposed the Kyoto treaty on climate change evangelism for nuclear power.’ (Have I Got Views for You p83)

‘But of all the tough-guy acts that Bush has performed in his Is a fanatical Thatcherite
first few months, of all the pieces of exuberant Reaganism,
nothing has so intoxicated the world with hate as his decision 'There is no need here to rehearse the steps of the matricide.
to scrumple up the Kyoto protocol and use if for putting practice Howe pounced. Heseltine did his stuff. After it was all over, my
in the White House… wife, Marina, claimed that she came upon me, stumbling down
a street in Brussels, tears in my eyes, and claiming that it was
‘Because we still need a rich, confident America; not just to as if someone had shot Nanny.' (Lend Me Your Ears p13)
provide the cash for the global military leadership that the
United States has to give from the Gulf to Kosovo, but also to On Blair: 'Give that man a handbag! And while you're at it, tell
keep the world economy moving…. If America were to meet him to wear a powder blue suit and a pineapple-coloured wig
its Kyoto targets now, it would require a cut of 30 per cent in next time he wants to impersonate this century's greatest
emissions, and how, exactly, is that supposed to work in the peace time prime minister.' (Lend Me Your Ears p132)
current economic downturn…. It would exacerbate the
recession, and when Bush says no, he is doing what is right not 'Mrs Thatcher pioneered a revolution that was imitated in one
just for America but for the world.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p318) way or another, around the world.' (Lend Me Your Ears p134)

Is an evangelist for nuclear power – and opposes wind Considers Liberal Democrats have ‘a characteristic human
farms psychological deformity'

‘We are responsible for just about every ground breaking ‘there is a third group, a minority, but a minority that possesses
scientific advance… Above all we were the nation that ushered a characteristic human psychological deformity. They can’t
in the dawn of the atomic age. stand the pettiness of intellectual consistency. They want it all
ways, and are capable of holding to mutually contradictory
‘That was the subject of the first major essay I ever wrote, and positions at once. Their policy on cake is pro-having it and pro-
I am happy to confess now, at a safe distance, that I plagiarised eating it, and they need a party that reflects them and their

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politically schizophrenic personalities… There are not many Lib Calls for large scale sacking of public sector workers as
Dems in Parliament, but even in that tiny group they incarnate good ‘for themselves’
dozens of diametrically opposing positions. You want to know
what the Lib Dem policy is on taxation, for instance, and you ‘It is agreed across the political spectrum that the public sector
want to know whether you are for or against a 50 per cent tax is growing at too fast a rate, and that this involves much waste.
rate. One half of your cerebrum thinks it quite right that the When we Tories discuss this subject, we invariably speak with
rich should pay more; the other lobe thinks tax is quite high brutal impersonality. We rave about the new public sector jobs
enough already. You are a perfect Lib Dem, a mass of that have been created since 1997, which we estimate at
contradictions, and your party supplies exactly what you are between 530,000 and 650,000. We wave copies of the
looking for.’ (Have I Got Views for You p90) Guardian appointments pages, where weird, politically correct
non-jobs are advertised, week in, week out, often with very
Opposed the introduction of the national minimum wage attractive salaries and perks.

‘Not even Mr Blair has been able to erode the unions’ ‘Or we might cite Ross Clark's Job of the Week column (in a
conviction that we all have a “right” to a minimum wage… magazine I dare not name), in which he picks the barmiest sits
Both the minimum wage and the Social Charter would palpably vacs, the waist-upwards gender awareness co-ordinators, the
destroy jobs.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p387) innumerable outreach and diversity officers, and we make the
whole thing sound - as indeed it is - not just expensive but
Arguing for a Tory election victory in 1997: ' Golly it occurs to also ludicrous.
you: no more minimum wage. The polls had been so
confidently predicting a Labour victory that you had already ‘We point out that, from April 2003 to April 2004, the number
made provision to pay your workers at least £4.10 an hour, of officials in Whitehall alone expanded by 12,280. That is
putting up your costs and greatly reducing your ability to re- bigger, my friends, than the entire population of Henley-on-
invest. Your mood lifts a notch higher at the thought.' (Lend Thames. It is bigger than Thame. If we Tories wished to reverse
Me Your Ears p104) just one year's growth in Whitehall, we would have to sack the
equivalent of the entire population of Ilfracombe, the seaside
Opposition to full pension rights for part-time workers town in Devon!

‘It's like Brussels imposing full pension rights for part-time And that is a problem about which we need to think more
workers. The guys who turn up at the end get as much as the keenly, and not just because I am fond of Ilfracombe, and used
people who worked all day!’ (The Spectator 16 December to have a jacket that was made there. It may be that many of
2000) these 650,000 new jobs are "non-jobs", in that they have been
generated according to some demented politically correct
Believes trouble comes from ‘too zealous’ attempts to algorithm. But we should also accept that the holders of these
tackle inequality jobs are flesh and blood; they have families; they have
mortgages; they have votes.
Conservatives: 'accept that material inequality is inevitable, and
that trouble comes from too zealous an attempt to change ‘It is the most ingenious feature of Labour's public sector
this.'(Lend Me Your Ears p126) expansion that they have thereby created a clerisy of officials
who depend for their livelihoods on a high-taxing, high-
‘We seem to have forgotten that societies need rich people, spending politically correct government; and therefore any
even sickeningly rich people, and not just to provide jobs for incoming Tory administration must realise that shrinkage of that
those who clean swimming pools and resurface tennis courts.’ public sector will necessitate real courage, and will involve real
(Lend Me Your Ears p384) pain... that is why we must explain to them why their
dismissal could be good not only for the economy as a whole,
[On test driving a Nissan Murano] “Tee hee,” I said to myself as but also for themselves... It is also worth reiterating that many
I took in the ludicrously arrogant Darth Vader-style snout. What of these jobs are the result of reckless legislation and
was it saying, with the plutocratic sneer of that gleaming grille? regulation: if you endlessly pass pointless health 'n' safety law,
It was saying “out of my way, small car driven by ordinary you will need pointless compliance officers, and so on.
person on modest income. Make way for Murano!”’ (Life in the
Fast Lane p239) ‘But the most important point is that these public sector jobs
represent a huge transfer of wealth from the productive to the
non-productive sectors of the economy, at a time when the

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private sector labour market is very tight, and skills are in short Mr Rodney Walker, former chairman of the NHS Trust
supply. There are other jobs waiting to be done and, if the federation, is also bang on the nail when he says that in the
coming shake-out directs people back on to the market, that future the NHS should be for those who are genuinely sick, and
will be no bad thing. (Daily Telegraph 2 December 2004) for the elderly. There is a moral point. If NHS services continue
to be free in this way, they will continue to be abused, like any
‘We should never forget that in asking people to vote for us we free service. If people have to pay for them, they will value
are essentially asking to take charge of taxation and spending, them more.' (Lend Me Your Ears p408)
and that our prime duty is to bring a new and more sensible –
and more Conservative – style of economic management… the 'we need to think about new ways of getting private money
public sector is continuing to expand, and Brown is taking ever into the NHS.' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen p15)
more money from the private sector to fund this expansion,
and therefore preventing its use in wealth creation or the 'my sermon about the beauties of putting private money into
generation of new jobs.’ (Have I Got Views for You p95) the the NHS... You can continue to believe in the NHS as the
sole and sufficient provider... or you can conclude that this is
Defends privatisation of the railways one of the reasons why we have a system which treats the
patients as dolts and serfs...
‘For all its faults, privatisation led to a 25 per cent increase in
railway use; it allowed huge quantities of cash to be raised on 'My point is not that we should scrap the NHS; of course not.
the markets - £2 billion in 2000 alone; and, in spite of the But in so far as we push new money into health, we should
crashes at Paddington and Hatfield, you were far safer shorten the distance that money travels between leaving our
travelling on the privatised railways than you were on British pockets – as taxpayers or premium-payers – and buying the
Rail. operation or service we need. As it happens, Dr Laura, my
friend the South Oxfordshire GP, is more robust. “Privatise the
‘What has caused the railways' recent cardiac infarct has been lot,” she tells me.
four years of Prescottian inertia, coupled with a hysterical
reaction to the Hatfield crash, which drove Railtrack into a 'And usually, as I say, these points – once taboo – are
bankruptcy that secretly or openly delighted every section of increasingly well taken, especially during the election.' (Friends,
the Labour Party. The railways have been managed fantastically Voters, Countrymen p134)
badly by this Government.’ (Daily Telegraph 10th January 2002)
Is opposed to the Social Chapter of the EU and also against
Attacks the welfare state as 'excessive disbursements that its provision on paternity leave
warp honest people'
Arguing for a Tory victory in 1997: ' Golly it occurs to you: no
'With £90 billion circulating through the tax and benefit system, more minimum wage. The polls had been so confidently
and with one in three households receiving a major benefit, predicting a Labour victory that you had already made provision
Beveridge's plan has become like the Common Agricultural to pay your workers at least £4.10 an hour, putting up your
Policy. People feel silly, indeed irresponsible towards their costs and greatly reducing your ability to re-invest. Your mood
families, if they pass up their chance to take a slice of the lifts a notch higher at the thought…You close your eyes, and
enormous communal pie, especially while everyone else is then you remember that the Social Chapter won't be coming
doing the same. The logical answer might be to apply free into force after all. Hmm. None of that mandatory four week
market principles, and attack this irrational system of subsidy, holiday for the staff, none of that ridiculously compulsory paid
the excessive disbursements that warp honest people.' (Lend paternity leave, none of those extra non-wage costs....It has to
Me Your Ears p412) be said, you reflect, that you have been spared Labour's
windfall tax on utility profits.' (Lend Me Your Ears p104)
Wants to introduce the private sector into the NHS and
believes patients should pay more Supports grammar schools and public schools

'I was much struck to read the words of Sir Duncan Nichol, the 'And then another happy thought strikes you. Your children are
former NHS chief executive, who has said that the only way to at a local grammar school, and you had been dreading that
solve the service's long-term funding problem is “increased Labour imposed ballot about abolishing selective admissions.'
private expenditure through, for example, an extension of user (Lend Me Your Ears p104)
charges and patient co-payments”. Good point, Sir Duncan...

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'there was one new concrete promise, that every child of five, cruel! We don’t need some report by scientists to show that
six or seven shall be educated in a class of fewer than 30 the animals suffer “stress”. No one looking at that deer could
pupils. This, said the Fettes-educated Mr Blair, would be paid deny that this was a sentient being in the extremity of
for by cancelling the assisted places scheme, and the chance of suffering. This wasn’t the stopping of some Cartesian clock. This
thousands of children to attend independent schools.' (Lend Me was savagery…
Your Ears p96)
‘When the 80,000 or so marchers for the preservation of
'He [Blair] wanted to scrap the assisted places scheme. The country sports arrive in Hyde Park tomorrow, they will have my
£100 million raised by this petty mutilation, by which the support…
Fettesian will deprive thousands of children of the chance he
had at an independent school, is to be used to take 250,000 ‘the strongest argument for protecting the Devon and Somerset
youngsters off the dole and put them into makework schemes stag-hounds – and I pick the staghounds because those are the
of moss-picking and origami.' (Lend Me Your Ears p117) ones I have observed the closest and which are, in the popular
imagination, even more brutal than the fox-hounds. The best
Does not support affordable housing argument in favour of keeping them is that hunting is the best
for the deer.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p413)
'the solution actually being deployed, which is to build some
affordable housing, and designate it specifically for the use of ‘Among the many reasons for mourning the passing of
local people. For instance, South Oxfordshire District Council can Auberon Waugh is that he will not be here to witness the final
require that, if there is a new development, it should contain a obliteration of hunting by the Labour Party... If I were not a
proportion of “starter homes”, and it can ensure that exceptions Tory, I think I would become one on this issue alone.’ (Daily
are made to normal planning rules to build social housing. You Telegraph 18 January 2001)
can see the problems already. How can you tell who is “local”?
How can you stop the market from asserting itself, as it always 'I will never vote to ban hunting. It is a piece of spite that has
will, and tempting the owners eventually to achieve the real nothing to do with animal welfare, and everything to do with
value of the property? And what, above all, do you do with the Blair's manipulation of rank-and-file Labour chippiness and class
Nimbies.' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen p74) hatred.' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen p146)

Opposition to the congestion charge 'I remember thinking to myself that if the future Member for
Henley-on-Thames goes shooting, he should damn well look as
‘In these dark days of the New Labour tyranny, when the though he knows the business.' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen
maniac Ken Livingstone is charging you an extra £1,200 for the p61)
privilege of using the Queen’s highway’ (Life in the Fast Lane
p185) 'Ok, I said to myself as I sighted the bird down the end of the
gun. This time, my fine feathered friend, there is no escape.'
Is in favour of not only fox but stag hunting (Friends, Voters, Countrymen p59)

‘All the warning we had was a crackling of the alder branches Opposes the ban on smoking in restaurants and public
that bend over the Exe, and the stag was upon us. I can see it places
now, stepping high in the water, eyes rolling, tongue
protruding, foaming, antlers streaming bracken and leaves like ‘Lefties are fundamentally interested in coercion and control,
the hat of some demented old woman, and behind it the and across British society you can see the huge progress they
sexual, high pitched yipping of the dogs. You never saw such a are now making in achieving their objectives: in the erosions of
piteous or terrible sight… free speech and civil liberties that are taking place under this
government, in the ever more elaborate regulation of the
‘I remember the guts streaming, and the stag turds spilling out workplace, the ban on hunting, smacking, smoking.’ (Have I
onto the grass from within the ventral cavity. Then they cut out Got Views for You p153)
the heart and gave it to my six-year-old brother, still beating,
he claimed ever afterwards, or still twitching, and he went 'I want now to reassure all smokers that in one way I am on
home singing “We’ve got the heart! We’ve got the heart!” so their side. It is precisely my continued failure to take up
we cooked it up with a bit of flour... smoking that leads me to oppose a ban on smoking in public
places... It is extremely difficult, statistically, to contract a cancer
‘No you don’t need to tell me that hunting with hounds is from passive smoking - far more difficult than contracting HIV,

Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right [Link] PAGE 8

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and no one is going to ban HIV sufferers from having sex... A Attitudes to the black community and calls the Stephen
ban on smoking in public places would not only take away Lawrence Inquiry ‘Orwellian’
discretion from the many establishments that want a smoking
clientele - people who want to enjoy a legal substance in 'Thoughtful Labour figures have for some years been brooding
perfect understanding of the risks. Above all, a ban on smoking on why Peckham, and other such areas, are so much nastier
in public places substitutes the discretion of the state for the than, say, the Nigerian suburbs from which Damilola originated.
individual will, in a way that is morally sapping. The answer, they think, is to do with the anomie of the
inhabitants, a sense that they have no stake in their society.
'If this stuff is legal, then people should be left to make up They take their benefits from the state, but feel no particular
their minds. They have the facts. We can all read the cartons. If loyalty in return. In areas where primary immigration is still
there is one thing wrong with us all these days, it is that we taking place on a large scale, there is only the vaguest sense of
are so mollycoddled, airbagged and swaddled with regulations belonging. To what do they belong? The African-Caribbean
and protections that we have lost any proper understanding of community? The Vietnamese community? The answer is often
risk. As long as tobacco is legal, people should be free to unclear, and this has psychological consequences. There seems
balance the pleasures and dangers themselves.' (Daily no reason to behave respectfully towards that little old woman
Telegraph 23 June 2005) coming out of the Post Office if you feel that she belongs to a
culture that is alien from your own... Why not piss against the
Attacks Tory Party admirers of Polly Toynbee wall if you feel that it is not really your wall, but part of a
foreign country.' (Lend Me Your Ears p207)
‘She [Polly Toynbee] incarnates all the nannying, high-taxing,
high-spending schoolmarminess of Blair's Britain. She is the 'When I shamble around the park in my running gear late at
defender and friend of everyone whose non-job has ever been night, and I come across that bunch of black kids, shrieking in
advertised in the Guardian appointments page, every gay and the spooky corner by the disused gents, I would love to
lesbian outreach worker, every clipboard-toter and pen-pusher pretend that I don't turn a hair.
and form-filler whose function has been generated by mindless
regulation. Polly is the high priestess of our paranoid, 'Now you might tell me not to be such a wuss. You might see
mollycoddled, risk-averse, airbagged, booster-seated culture of that I am no more at risk than if I had come across a bunch of
political correctness and 'elf 'n' safety fascism.’ (Daily Telegraph winos. But somehow or other a little beeper goes off in my
November 23, 2006) brain. I'm not sure what triggers it (the sayings of Sir Paul
Condon? The Evening Standard?), but I put on a pathetic turn of
Refers to black people as ‘picaninnies’ and with speed. You might tell me that when they shout their cheery
‘watermelon smiles’ catcalls, I should smile and wave. And, you know, maybe a big
girl's blouse like me would break into an equally rapid lollop if
‘What a relief it must be for Blair to get out of England. It is it were a gang of white kids.
said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth,
partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of 'Quite possibly. The trouble is I am not sure. I cannot rule out
flag-waving picaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice that I have suffered from a tiny fit of prejudice. I have
victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by prejudged this group on the basis of press reports, possibly in
foreign politeness. the right-wing newspapers, about the greater likelihood of
being mugged by young black males than by any other group.
‘They say he is shortly off to the Congo. No doubt the AK47s And if that is racial prejudice, then I am guilty.
will fall silent, and the pangas will stop their hacking of human
flesh, and the tribal warriors will all break out in watermelon 'And so are you, baby. So are we all. If there is anyone reading
smiles to see the big white chief touch down in his big white this who has never experienced the same disgraceful reflex,
British taxpayer-funded bird.’ (Daily Telegraph 10 January 2002) then – well I just don't believe you. It is common ground
among both right-wingers and left-wingers that racism is
‘He cannot resist the sort of public-school joke that falls badly “natural”, in that it seems to arise organically, in all
on black ears. Rod Liddle recalls that when he and Johnson civilisations.' (Lend Me Your Ears p210)
went to Uganda together to look at the work of Unicef, Johnson
cheerily remarked to the Swedish Unicef workers and their 'Heaven knows why Macpherson made his weird
black driver: “Right, let's go and look at some more recommendation, that the law might be changed so as to
picaninnies.”' (The Observer Sunday October 5, 2003) allow prosecution for racist language or behaviour other than in

PAGE 9 [Link] Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right

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a public place. I can't understand how this sober old buzzard Believes in South Africa there is the ‘majority tyranny of
was prevailed upon to say that a racist incident might be so black rule.’
defined in the view of the victim or any other person’. This is
Orwellian stuff. ‘Mandela never accepted the Swiss-style constitution he [de
Klerk] proposed; and last year, fed up with being marginalized,
'Not even under the law of Ceausescu's Romania, could you be de Klerk quit the government. He must have known that this
prosecuted for what you said in your own kitchen. No wonder would happen, that the minority tyranny of apartheid would be
the police are already whingeing that they cannot make any followed by the majority tyranny of black rule.’ (Lend Me Your
arrests in London. No wonder the CPS groans with anti- Ears p464)
discrimination units, while making a balls-up of so many cases.'
(Lend Me Your Ears p211) On Africans and 'instant carbohydrate gratification'

'it is as if the PC brigade, having punched this hole in the 'The problem is not that we were once in charge, but that we
Metropolitan Police, having forced this admission, is swarming are not in charge any more... Consider Uganda, pearl of Africa,
through to take over the entire system. There has been a whiff as an example of the British record. ... the British planted
of the witch-hunt as the Lawrence road-show tours the country, coffee and cotton and tobacco, and they were broadly right... If
demanding confessions of racism from senior officers, and left to their own devices, the natives would rely on nothing but
excoriating those, like Sir Paul [Condon] who are not prepared the instant carbohydrate gratification of the plantain. You never
to defame their entire force. If, in a few years' time, you were saw a place so abounding in bananas: great green barrel-sized
to ask a member of the public: “Who killed Stephen bunches, off to be turned into matooke. Though this dish
Lawrence?”, the answer would probably be “The Police.” Am I (basically fried banana) was greatly relished by Idi Amin, the
alone is wondering whether a sensible attempt to find justice colonists correctly saw that the export market was limited...
for the family of Stephen Lawrence has given way to hysteria?' The best fate for Africa would be if the old colonial powers, or
(Lend Me Your Ears p426) their citizens, scrambled once again in her direction; on the
understanding that this time they will not be asked to feel
'What about the Ceaucescu-ish recommendation that it should guilty. (Spectator 2 February 2002)
be possible to legislate against racism even in a private place.’
(Lend Me Your Ears p216) Believes Chinese culture is merely imitative

'we could probably achieve the same results, if not better, if ‘Chinese cultural influence is virtually nil, and unlikely to
we axed large chunks of the anti-racism industry, stopping increase… Indeed, high Chinese culture and art are almost all
taxing so many people with the threat of legal action, and left imitative of western forms: Chinese concert pianists are
a bit more of the struggle against racism to tolerance and good technically brilliant, but brilliant at Schubert and Rachmaninov.
manners.' (Lend Me Your Ears p212) Chinese ballerinas dance to the scores of Diaghilev. The number
of Chinese Nobel prizes won on home turf is zero, although
‘It may be that The Spectator will be burnt across Britain this there are of course legions of bright Chinese trying to escape to
morning by a public which feels that this time we have gone Stanford and Caltech… It is hard to think of a single Chinese
too far. We carry the first English-language post-election sport at the Olympics, compared with umpteen invented by
interview with Jean-Marie Le Pen.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p297) Britain, including ping-pong, I’ll have you know, which
originated at upper-class dinner tables and was first called
‘[Boris Johnson] Do you really mean to say the empire wasn’t a whiff-whaff. The Chinese have a script so fiendishly complicated
good thing? that they cannot produce a proper keyboard for it.’ (Have I Got
‘[Clare Short] No it wasn’t Views for You p277).
‘[Boris Johnson] The British empire ended slavery, though; no
one else. "A sweet-faced Chinese air stewardess [is] standing over me in
‘[Clare Short] The British empire helped to organise slavery. my aisle seat. 'Prease, sir,' said the BA girl, 'Prease come with
‘[Boris Johnson] Well, I say, it was the native rulers of West me. I have found a better seat for you in row 52'." It transpires
Africa who invented and also helped organise slavery. that BA have a policy of separating adult men from young
‘[Clare Short] It was the black African kings who had feudal children. But one of Boris's offspring gives the game away:
friends in Europe. They both organised slavery,’… and our "'He's our father!'... 'Oh,' said the stewardess, flummoxed. 'Velly
discussion on slavery ends with a nil-nil scoreline.’ (Lend Me solly.'" (The Spectator 4 January 2003)
Your Ears p454)

Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right [Link] PAGE 10

 compass

Sexism sun”… No one knows whether this is caused by the

fecklessness of the modern British male, or by women’s
'none was hotter than the shadow social security secretary, liberation; or whether it is because divorce has become too
David Willetts. Round and round he twirled, squiring one Tory easy.’ (Lend Me Your Ears p395)
filly after another, until flushed and satiated they could take no
more. Around him we moved in our admiring orbits, old ‘Alan Clark… Here was a man, just like the readers of GQ,
beldames, jigging white-haired captains of industry, but none Esquire, Loaded – all the reassurance-craving magazines that
was faster than Willetts... Why was the evening such a have sprouted in the last 10 years – who was endlessly
success? There is one measurement I hesitate to mention, since fascinated by the various advantages and disappointments of
the last time I did, I am told, the wife of the editor of the his own gonads. He was interested in cars; he had Bentleys
Economist cancelled her subscription to the Daily Telegraph in bulging with tinplate testosterone; he had Rollers and Aston
protest at my crass sexism. It is what is called the Tottometer, Martins and special chickwagons for arriving at the Spectator
the geiger-counter that detects good-looking women. In 1997, I party… Above all, like the ideal Loaded reader, he had a selfish
reported, these were to be found in numbers at the Labour side to him. (Lend Me Your Ears p500) 'Some dream their teeth
conference. Now - and this is not merely my own opinion - the are falling out, or that they are about to be executed with a
Tories are fighting back in a big way. ' (The Spectator 10 scimitar by a beautiful black woman (I have this quite often,
February 2001) actually).' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen p48)

[On driving a Ferrari]: 'I seemed to be averaging a speed of X Labour’s ‘appalling agenda’ of ‘the teaching of
and then the M3 opened up before me, a long quiet Bonneville homosexuality in schools’
flat stretch, and I am afraid it was as though the whole county
of Hampshire was lying back and opening her well-bred legs to ‘Labour's appalling agenda, encouraging the teaching of
be ravished by the Italian stallion.' (Life in the Fast Lane p261) homosexuality in schools, and all the rest of it.’ (The Spectator
15 April 2000) ‘the essence of that Tory case is unchanged... it
Or on a Lotus: 'That is why it was such a huge moment when is more sensitive to spare parents' anxieties, than to allow Left-
two of the biggest cheeses in the Lotus group came in to my wing local authorities to waste taxpayers' money on idiotic and
office to hand over the swishest, fastest, most chick-pulling irrelevant homosexual instruction.’ (Daily Telegraph 3 August
Lotus ever devised.' (Life in the Fast Lane p243) 2000)

‘The chicks in the GQ expenses department – and if you can’t ‘Slowly Labour is winning the battle it really cares about, the
call them chicks, then what the hell, I ask you, is the point of Kulturkampf, adjusting what can be said, and what cannot be
writing for GQ.’ (Life in the Fast Lane p57) said... Homosexuality is to be taught in schools.’ (The Spectator
29 April 2000)
[On driving an Alfa Romeo] ‘She was blonde. She was
beautiful. She was driving some poxy little Citroen or Peugeot ‘I first met the Bishop [of Liverpool] a few weeks ago at a
thing... And she had just overtaken me... And let me tell you, I gloomy convocation of top clergy and journalists in Windsor
wasn’t having it. Castle. The hacks were thin on the ground... I can say that the
clerics gave us a wigging for being so mean to the Church of
‘Because if there is one thing calculated to make the England... Why did we draw attention to tricky subjects like
testosterone slosh in your ears like the echoing sea and the red homosexuality, aka the Pulpit Poofs issue?’ (The Spectator 16
mist of war descend over your eyes, its being treated as December 2000)
though you were an old woman by a young woman... the
whole endocrine orchestra said: “Go. Take.” You can’t be dissed 'if gay marriage was OK – and I was uncertain on the issue –
by some blonde in a 305. then I saw no reason in principle why a union should not be
consecrated between three men, as well as two men; or
‘Yes there is something about the very marque, Alfa, that indeed three men and a dog.' (Friends, Voters, Countrymen
makes the seminal vesicles writhe like a bag of ferrets.’ (Life in p96)
the Fast Lane p26)
‘When the [hunting] ban is blocked in the Lords, as it surely
‘Like much of western Europe, Britain faces a demographic will be, Blair will have his excuse for another attack on the
quandary. In the words of a recent UN interview the Upper House. If Labour wins the election, Blair will invoke the
populations of EU countries are “melting like snow in the Parliament Act to sweep aside the opinion of the peers, as he

PAGE 12 [Link] Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right

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did over homosexual sex at 16, making a mockery of the Lords recent edition it laid 28 charges against him and said that not
and consolidating his elective dictatorship. (Daily Telegraph 18 only was he unfit to govern Italy, he was also unfit to be
January 2001) president of the EU… It is the Economist attack which may
have contributed to the presence of The Spectator here amid
‘Notice the way Peter Mandelson is pictured out on the town the wattle and rosemary of his 170-acre Costa Smeralda
with his boyfriend; not that there is anything wrong with that, estate…
perish the thought, just that it would have been unimaginable
before the last election.’ (The Spectator 29 April 2000) ‘But we know that we are unlikely to reach a verdict on the key
questions, relating as they do to the abortive 1985 sale of a state-
‘More important, I am not sure how widespread this new right- owned biscuit company to Buitoni, the spaghetti kings. Let us
on mood really is. Metropolitan opinion was wrong-footed over leave those matters to the lawyers and desiccated calculators of
Section 28, where the public thought differently from New the Economist. We have a broader and higher purpose: that is, to
Labour; and three days after the event it was clear that the establish whether or not we feel that Sig. Berlusconi is on the
country did not agree with the editorialists on the verdict whole a force for good in Italy, Europe and the world…
passed on Tony Martin. You can say that William Hague is
opportunist to see the gap between the polite view and the ‘We have drunk pints of sweet iced tea, brought silently and
public view. But you can't deny that he is right to go for it.’ unprompted, as he has outlined his robust, neo-conservative
(The Spectator 29 April 2000) views of the world… We have heard him extol Thatcher, praise
Blair (“I have never known us to disagree on anything”), laud
Attitude to the Koran Bush…

‘The proposed ban on incitement to “religious hatred” makes ‘It is quite the done thing, he protests, to pass a law exempting
no sense unless it involves a ban on the Koran itself.’ (Daily himself from prosecution for the term of his office. Chirac has done
Telegraph 21 July 2005) the same. But it was never our goal, in this interview, to establish
the dodginess of his business practices…
‘When is Little Britain going to do a sketch, starring Matt Lucas
as one of the virgins? Islam will only be truly acculturated to ‘If we are obliged to compare Silvio Berlusconi with Anna Lindh
our way of life when you could expect a Bradford audience to [the Swedish foreign minister], and other bossy, high-taxing
roll in the aisles at Monty Python’s Life of Mohammed.’ European politicians, I agree with Farrell: as the narrator says of Jay
([Link] Gatsby, a man Berlusconi to some extent resembles, he is “better
religious_hatred_bi_1.php) that the whole damn lot of them”.’ (Have I Got Views for You
p384)
Considers Edward Kennedy faced a dilemma on whether to
‘come clean’ on Chappaquiddick Opposes devolution for Scotland and Wales

‘It is difficult to keep a clear head when you’ve driven off the Imagining the Tories had won the 1997 election: 'As you saunter
bridge at Chappaquiddick in the middle of the night, and the along the sunlit street, it strikes you that the United Kingdom as a
water is closing around your head and you have to order your whole has escaped destruction at the hands of Blair, and his plan
priorities: save self; save pretty blonde co-passenger? And you for Scottish devolution.' (Lend Me Your Ears p105)
then have to work out whether to deny all knowledge of Mary-
Jo Kopechne in the hope of protecting your political career, or 'It is utterly absurd that Labour should be calling on us all to
whether to do the right thing and come clean.’ (Lend Me Your remember the value of that inclusive word “British”, when it is the
Ears p401) government's own devolution programme which has fomented
the rising sense of Scottishness, and Englishness.' (Lend Me Your
Supports Silvio Berlusconi Ears p209)

‘You could try the Italian political establishment; or the Insults New Guinea
European liberal elite; or just civilised Western opinion: all
things which Silvio has scandalised and divided… But it was "For 10 years we in the Tory Party have become used to Papua
the attack by the Economist newspaper that, I suspect, got in New Guinea-style orgies of cannibalism and chief-killing, and
among Berlusconi and his team. ‘Twice now, this distinguished so it is with a happy amazement that we watch as the
paper (motto: the wit to be dull) has given Silvio a frenzied madness engulfs the Labour Party."
kicking. It has said that he is not fit to govern Italy, and in a

Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right [Link] PAGE 12

 compass

Insults Liverpool Is prepared to discuss how seriously a journalist should be

beaten up and whether to supply his address
Boris Johnson did not write the notorious article on Liverpool (the Darius Guppy transcript)
that appeared in The Spectator after the murder of Ken Bigley.
But as editor he approved its publication as a leader article and The most notorious episode concerning Boris Johnson and his
therefore bears full responsibility for it: concept of personal morality was the telephone conversation
he had with the convicted fraudster Darius Guppy about the
‘Liverpool is a handsome city with a tribal sense of community. later’s proposal to have the journalist Stuart Collier beaten up.
A combination of economic misfortune - its docks were, Guppy wanted Johnson to supply Collier’s address. The
fundamentally, on the wrong side of England when Britain transcript of this conversation has been published in Private Eye
entered what is now the European Union - and an excessive and elsewhere.
predilection for welfarism have created a peculiar, and deeply
unattractive, psyche among many Liverpudlians. They see Johnson did not tell Guppy to go to hell, or threaten to inform
themselves whenever possible as victims, and resent their the police if anything happened to the journalist but instead
victim status; yet at the same time they wallow in it. Part of discussed how badly Collier was to be beaten up.
this flawed psychological state is that they cannot accept that
they might have made any contribution to their misfortunes, ‘GUPPY: ‘Not badly at all.
but seek rather to blame someone else for it, thereby ‘JOHSON: ‘I really want to know…
deepening their sense of shared tribal grievance against the ‘GUPPY: ‘I guarantee you he will not be seriously hurt.
rest of society. ‘JOHNSON: ‘How badly will he be…
‘GUPPY: ‘He will not have a broken limb or broken arm. He will
The deaths of more than 50 Liverpool football supporters at not be put into intensive care or anything like that. He will
Hillsborough in 1989 was undeniably a greater tragedy than probably have a couple of black eyes and a… cracked rib or
the single death, however horrible, of Mr Bigley; but that is no something like that.
excuse for Liverpool's failure to acknowledge, even to this day, ‘JOHNSON: ‘Cracked rib?
the part played in the disaster by drunken fans at the back of ‘GUPPY: ‘Nothing which you didn’t suffer at rugby, OK?’
the crowd who mindlessly tried to fight their way into the
ground that Saturday afternoon. The police became a The conversation ended with Johnson saying ‘OK, Darrie, I said
convenient scapegoat, and the Sun newspaper a whipping-boy I’ll do it and I’ll do it.’
for daring, albeit in a tasteless fashion, to hint at the wider
causes of the incident.’ (The Spectator 16 Oct 2004) The Daily Mail carried a comprehensive account of the
background to this phone call on 16 July 1995:
Insults Portsmouth
‘The telephone call to the Brussels office of the Daily Telegraph
Portsmouth is: ‘one of the most depressed towns in Southern was from a desperate man. Darius Guppy, ex-Eton and Oxford...
England, a place that is arguably too full of drugs, obesity, and soon to become one of Britain’s most notorious fraudsters
underachievement and Labour MPs." (MP slammed over 'fat was becoming agitated.
city' slur", BBC, 2007-04-03.
[Link] ‘For weeks, Guppy had been trying to track down a man with
whom he had become obsessed, News of the World journalist
Insults the Dutch Stuart Collier, who had been inquiring into his background.

'It is a wonder that the Dutch look so tall and healthy, when ‘Guppy wanted him stopped, frightened and physically
you consider what they eat.' (Lend Me Your Ears p19) assaulted – and had lined up a mysterious South London figure
to arrange it. However, one crucial part of the plan remained
Believes 'former crypto communists' run the BBC elusive – Collier’s private phone number and address.

‘the former crypto communists who now run the BBC.’ (Have I ‘One man could provide the key: Guppy’s old school and
Got Views for You p151) university confidant, Boris Johnson, then the Telegraph’s
European correspondent in Brussels.

‘Today, Johnson and his Right-wing clique enjoy the company of

PAGE 13 [Link] Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right

 compass

ex-Cabinet Ministers... In the pages of the Spectator magazine – to realise that he’s ****** someone off and that whoever he’s
the bible of those who believe they have a divine right to tell ******* off is not the sort of person he wants to mess around
the rest of us how to behave and to vote – he might like to with. “
think he has become a modern day sage...
‘Johnson had evidently spoken of Collier before: the
‘Johnson also believes in friendship. When Darius Guppy conversation begins with him telling Guppy he has someone
telephoned him about his plan for Collier, Johnson led Guppy to “going through the files”, news Guppy describes as “brilliant”
believe that he had arranged for a number of “contacts” to try and “fantastic”.
to get Collier’s details. It was taking some time, and Johnson
appeared worried that he would be caught out. He knew what ‘But there is no doubt Johnson appears to be afraid of
Guppy was planning for Collier – but, amazingly, Guppy assured detection. “If you **** up, in any way,” he warns Guppy, “if he
him the “beating up” would not be too severe. suspects I’m involved...”

‘The details of Guppy’s extraordinary plan are revealed in a Guppy: “No, no, he won’t, Boris.”
secret tape recording made of Guppy’s home telephone some
months before he was charged with a £1.8 million insurance When Johnson says Collier will go “apeshit” if he finds out who
swindle. Guppy was jailed for five years... In the recording, is responsible for the attack, Guppy says he “doesn’t give a
which has been vice analysed by experts, Guppy rehearses **** because no one he has ever met is “as psychopathic
with Johnson why he wants to take violent revenge on Collier – potentially as me”.
and how he desperately needs his friend’s help. Guppy and
Johnson had a close relationship, forged amid the privileged ‘Both agree that things are “getting serious”.
surroundings of Eton and then Oxford, where the pair became
leading lights in one of the university’s most blue-chip dining ‘Johnson: “If it got out...”
societies, the Bullingdon.
‘Guppy interrupts: “That he’d been beaten up.”
‘In the 21 minute conversation, in the summer of 1990, Guppy
says he is a potential psychopath, before comparing himself to ‘Johnson: “Beaten up, it would inevitably get back to the
history’s great generals from Rommel and Patten to Napoleon. contact.’
Sometimes shouting, sometimes cajoling, he explains he
cannot afford to “look stupid” by delaying the attack on Collier. ‘Johnson says he has used four contacts to track down
information about Collier, and is worried one of them “might
‘He says Johnson has his “word of honour” that his (Johnson’s) put two and two together, if he heard this guy [Collier] had
role in the assault will remain undetected. been beaten up.”

‘More than once, Johnson tries to find out how severely Collier ‘Guppy interrupts: “But Boris there’s absolutely no ****** proof:
is to be injured. Guppy tells him “not badly at all”. you just deny it. I mean, there’s no proof at all.”

‘Johnson: “I, really, I want to know...” ‘Johnson interrupts: “Well, yeah.”

‘Guppy: “I guarantee you he will not be seriously hurt.” ‘Guppy: “I mean, you know, big deal. You’re sitting in Brussels
and the day it happens you’re in Brussels, its as simple as
‘Johnson: “How badly will he be...” that.’

‘Guppy, interrupting: “He will not have a broken limb or broken ‘He repeatedly appeals to Johnson so have faith in him. At one
arm; he will not be put into intensive care or anything like that. stage, Johnson replies: “I do have faith in you.”
He will probably get a couple of black eyes and a... cracked rib
or something.” ‘Guppy insists: “As far as I’m concerned, I have never told you
what I require this number for. You do not know at all... so you
‘Johnson: “Cracked rib?” are totally off the hook.” He adds: “You have nothing to fear. I
give you my personal guarantee, OK, and my word of honour.”
‘Guppy: “Nothing which you didn’t suffer at rugby, OK? But he’ll By the end of the conversation, Johnson is volunteering to do
get scared and that’s what I want... I want him to get scared, I what he can to help.
want him to have no idea who’s behind it, OK? And I want him

Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right [Link] PAGE 14

 compass

‘Guppy: “Well do it discreetly. I... if it’s in that way going to look

suspicious. That’s all I require – just the address: the address
and the phone number... all right? Now I guarantee you, you
have nothing to worry about. [Slowly, emphatically] Believe
me. All right? You have my personal guarantee. I’ve never let
you down, all right?”

‘Johnson: “OK Darrie, I said I’ll do it and I’ll do it. Don’t worry.”

‘Guppy: “Boris, I really mean it, I love you and I will owe you
this, all right? And I’m a man who keeps my word.”

Bibliography

Boris Johnson (HarperPerennial, 2004), Lend me your ears

Boris Johnson (HarperPerennial, 2006), Have I got views for you

Boris Johnson (HarperPerennial, 2007), Life in the fast lane

Boris Johnson (HarperCollins, 2002), Friends, voters and country

PAGE 15 [Link] Boris Johnson - a member of the hard Tory right

 Compass is the democratic left pressure group,

“ whose goal is to debate

and develop the ideas for a more equal
and democratic world, then
campaign and organise to help ensure
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they become reality.

Join today and you can help change the world of tomorrow -
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compass
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