ManPretty big.

Woman: Excuse me?

Man: Im sorry. I was just sort of, you know, speaking out loud. Pretty big in here. Thats what Im saying

Woman: Oh. Right.

Man: Lots of room for, you know, people.
Woman. Yes, its popular. You can eat here if you want.
Man: You sure?
Woman: Of course.
Man: Thanks
Woman: I thought you meant me.
Man: Im sorry?
Woman: When you said that pretty big. I thought you were saying that to me. About me.
Man: Oh no no
I wouldnt
You did?
Woman: For a second.
Man: Why would I do a thing like that? Im not .
Woman: Youd be surprised. People say all kinds of things here.
Man: So you mean, people actually ..what? Say things to your face?
Woman: Of course. All the time.
Man: About what?
Woman: My hair color. What do you think?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------Tracy: Like it or not, appearances matter. But sometimes we have to look beyond appearances to discover a
persons true character.
Robert: But sometimes the discovery of this character can be the ugliest discovery of all.
Tracy: Fat Pig.
Robert: By Neil Labute.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------Man: So where do you work?
Woman: The library?
Man:Oh, youre a librarian
Woman: Yeah, well we dont really use that term anymore, but
Man: Sure, I know, its probably like a printed word specialist or something now I suppose
Woman: Exactly:Theyre always coming up with these new names for stuff, something to make the person feel
better, like refuse technician,
Man: Thats so true
Woman: Right. The problem is you still find yourself picking shit up off the street no matter what they call
you you know
Man: You have a terrific laugh
Woman: Thanks.
Man: Your welcome. A potty mouth , but a really cute laugh.
Woman: Thats sweet, thank you. Now that I am so self-concious that Ill never do it again
Man: Exactly.
Woman: Although, I mean, if were gonna start dating .
Man: What?
Woman: Im kidding.
Man: Oh, right. Got it. Little slow.
Woman: Im sorry. You should have seen your face..
Man: What. No.
Woman: I thought you were going to choke
Man: Thats not true, come on.
Woman: Pretty close.
Man: No, thats not why would you say that? You just caught me off guard is all. Seriously.
Woman: Anyway, I was just playing. Big people are jolly, remember.
Man: Ummmmmm-hmmmmmmm
Woman: Its one of our best qualities.
Man: Well, at least you have one.
Woman: And you dont
Man: [Link] for debate
Woman: Really?
Man: I mean .you know, if really had to come up with one for the big guy upstairs or whatever, Id probably
do does notrun with scissors
Woman:Really?
Handsome guy like you and thats all youre good for? To look at?
Man: Pretty much.
Woman: How about a good lover? Not on the list?
Man: Thats very direct.
Woman: Librarians are fu nny people
Man: I guess I shouldnt have let my card lapse
Woman: No, look what youve been missing
Man: Yeah
Woman: You dont have to answer that. It was rude.
Man: No, its OK.
Woman: Youre just OK?
Man: Something like that. I do fine. Wow. Ive never been asked hat before. In that way.
Woman: No?
Man: Not at lunch anyhow. Its kind of invigorating actually. You seem like a really I dont know. An
interesting person I guess.

Man: Listen, Im Im I need to get back to the office . Downtown.

Woman: All right. Sorry if I was
Man: No no, it was but could we. I dunno what Im asking here. Should we
see each other again.
Woman: Why?
Man: I dunno I mean Im just asking could we. Im not trying to pick
you up or anything.
Woman: Too bad. Yes. We should.
Man: For lunch. Or ummmm, dinner.
Woman: I dont only eat.
I can be coaxed into doing other stuff, too
Man: Of course. I didnt mean
Woman: I know. Its a joke.
Man: Right, sure Im really striking out on the humor part here.
Woman: Youre doing fine. So how about Friday?
Man: Ummm. Yeah. Evening..
Woman: Great:
Man: OK Library Lady, Ill call you..
Woman: Helen. My names Helen
Man: As in of Troy? That was so lame, sorry
Helen: Right, the thousand ships and all, because it would take that many to
lift me.
Man: You shouldnt do that. Make so much fun of yourself.
Helen: Why not?
Man: Ummmmmm Im sure there is a very good reason. Ill get back to you.
Helen: You do that. Youve got the number there
Tom: Right. Ill call you. Im Tom by the way.
Helen: Ill see you Tom.

Helen: So, you feel comfortable with me? I mean

Tom: Im ..yeah, Ive honestly never been more relaxed around a person
I mean, my mother , but that gets into a weird area
What?
Helen: I dunno .I just feel ..kind of isolated. At times.
Tom. Helen, havent I been with you every day? I mean, my friends have even
said things, noticed it. Im hardly with them anymore.
Helen: Butthats what I mean.
Tom: What?
Helen: Neither am I? Weve been going out for like however long and I
havent met any of your friends.
Tom: Thats true but, ..I mean Ive been waiting for the, maybe, a right
time or something. One of those office parties or
Helen: Tom.
Tom: No truthfully, I thought maybe on the Fourth or we do a big party at
the beach.
A cookout and stuff.
Helen: Great. Should I go with a thong or a little more conventional.
Tom: Very funny.
I was being serious.
Helen: Its just a little like were I dunno, hiding or whatever. From
people.
Tom. No.
Helen: You dont think.
Tom: No, Helen, I dont. At all. I mean, were not exactly hanging out
with all your pals, either. Weve barely
Helen: Thats not true. I asked you all the time if youd, want to.. or if
we
Tom: Yeah but
Helen: Im dying to show you off Tom, if you let me. Ive told you to pick
me up at work All kinds of things!
Helen: I just hope your not embarrassed by me in some way, because, well, I
mean, I dont know what..
Tom: No. Why would you say that? Im not at all Why would you say that.
Helen: Nothing. Im not saying anything. Except I need you to be honest with
me here. Today, if possible.
Tom: Well, what am I supposed to say now?. To that?
Helen: Just the truth.
Tom: Fine. Look, Im gonna be truthful now so just let me you know,
bumble along. All right?
Helen: Please. Bumble.
Tom: Helen I want you. Both mentally and physically. Each curve, every
last inch of you. Id hope you can see that by now
Look, Im falling
for you, falling hard yeah I am and I hope you give me a chance to prove
that in the near future, at the afore-mentioned volley ball slash beach party
or at some other to-be determined public gathering. Okay. That sort of
sucked, but most of the ingredients were in there
Helen: Yeah and it was kinda lovely
Tom: Then, good, thanks
Helen: No, thank you, Tom Sullivan
Tom: Your welcome, Helen, whats your last name.
Helen: You ass.
Tom: I know it starts with a B Its like
Tom/Helen
Bond
Tom Youre awesome.
Helen: You, too Tom. Youre a good man.

Helen: How long do these things usually go? Any idea?

Tom: Ummmm, no but we dont need to stay or anything. Thats fine, I
just need to put in an appearance .
Helen: No, I like it. Being here with you and all your . Its great.
Tom: No, Helen, what?
Helen: Same ol stuff. Doesnt matter.
Tom: Of course it does. Of course tell me.
Helen: Look where were at. I mean, Tom, its .forget it.
Tom: This isnt Helen, I just wanted to get us near the dunes here, so wes
have a little protection from the wind. Thats all,
Helen: Tom
Tom: Im serious
Helen: But we didnt hardly talk to
Tom: I introduced you to people
Helen: In the parking lot. As you and I were unloading stuff out of the
car. Thats not an introduction.
Tom: Come on. I dont wanna just eat something, all right. We shouldnt
fight.
Helen: Its not fighting Tom. When you and I talk thats not fighting Its
talking. Thats what people do.
Tom: Whatever.
Helen: Tom whats going on.
Tom: Nothing,
Helen: I told you .weeks ago I said to you that you needed to be honest .
More than anything else.
Tom: I know. I know that
Helen: But youre this isnt
Tom: Helen, come on, stop now! Shit. This is my company picnic, Okay?.
Were supposed to be having some fun.
Helen: Fun? Okay, lets chat, because its pretty damn hard to just sit
here with a smile plastered on my face .
Tom: All right.
Helen: Tom, you are aware that I like you. You already know that.
Tom: Yes.
Helen: I mean, its now pretty obvious that there are some problems here.
Tom: I guess.
Helen: Please, You need to stay in this. Focused on it, so you dont drift
off or anything. I love you so much, I really do [Link] a connecgtion with
you that I havent allowed myself to dream of, let alone be a part of, in so
long, Maybe ever,
But I cant be with you if your feeling somethingother than that same thing
that I am. Im worried sick Look at me, when did you ever see me not eat a
hot dog that was placed in front of me, huh, I know you hate those jokes,
sorry, but Im one more thing .Just this .And Ive never said this to
anyone, not any other person in the world. Ever. My parents or a no one.
I would change for you. I would. I dont mean slim fast that the guy on TV
and the sandwiches from Subway, S
Tom: Helen thats not .
Helen: Ill do something radical to myself if you want me to. Like be
stapled or have some surgery or whatever it takes because I do not want
this to end. Im willing to do that, because of what you mean to me. The
kind of just ecstasy that youve brought to me. So
I just wanted you to
know that.
Helen: This would be an excellent time to say something sweet to me. If you
at all care about my feelings.
Tom: I know .Im Helen, that was such a nice thing to offer,

Helen: Oh No
Tom: I do think that some time would be good here, I dunno
Helen:

Oh.

Wow.

That;s a bit of a

Tom: Listen if it were in some other time or land that nobody else was
around on...like a deserted island then everything. I wouldnt be so fucking
paranoid. About what people around me are saying. Or even thinking. But I
guess I do care what my peers feel about me, or how they view my choices, and
yes, maybe that makes me not very deep or petty or some other word hell, I
dunno, Its my Achilles flaw or something, Im
Helen:

Tom, Dont do this, okay, Please dont .

We can, I dunno,

Tom: No, just let me finish! I dont want to fight this, anymore. Im just
so tired of fighting this. And I guess thats what I have to say to you. Is
that Im not brave. I know you always thought I was and that I could be, but
Im not. I am a weak and fearful person, Helen. And Im not going to bet
any better any time soon.
Helen:
Tom:

Tom, we can work on this...

No.

No, I dont think I can.